There were 2,524 spoof news stories published in 2021. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to browse the spoof news archives.
Seattle Is Sizzling As The Heat Index Hits 119 Degrees!
SEATTLE – (Satire News) – The city famous for coffee, Bill Gates, and asparagus, has just hit a sweltering heat index of 119 degrees. Many residents of Seattle stated that anyone who still does not believe in climate change is either stupid, hard-…
Read full storyAfrican Americans & Other Minorities Should Be Fitted With Body Cameras Say BLM
African Americans and other racial minorities across the United States should be equipped with body cameras in an attempt to combat the ever-increasing crimes committed against them by law enforcement officers. A spokesman for Black Lives Matter s…
Read full storyTyson Fury To Fight Anthony Joshua AND Deontay Wilder On Same Night
It has been announced that WBC Heavyweight king, Tyson Fury, has been ordered to fight Deontay Wilder and Anthony Joshua on the same night by boxing authorities. Fury, 32, who won the WBC world heavyweight title from Wilder in a rematch in Februar…
Read full storyNFL Network's Siciliano is determined not to let giant ears slow him down
The NFL Network just announced that afternoon anchor Andrew Siciliano is "scheduled for a surgical procedure" in June to remedy resistance problems caused by his drastically oversized ears. Siciliano recently has griped on a few occasions that the…
Read full storyThe NFL's First Transgender Cheerleader Comes Out
TAMPA BAY, Florida – (Sports Satire) – Sporting Chance Magazine has confirmed that a Tampa Bay Buccaneers cheerleader is the NFLs first transgender rah-rah girl. Twenty-four-year-old Gayle Wanderlust, of Tallahassee, who has been cheering for the…
Read full storyHarry Proclaims Himself The King In The North!
"Harry 'the Bastard' Windsor has avenged the Paris Betrayal He is the Ginger Wolf! The King in the North of LA! The King in the North LA!" Was the chant from California that announced that Prince Harry has laid down the gauntlet to the British Royal…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene is Extremely Depressed Because Her Nude Calendar Only Sold 6 Copies Nationwide
BALTIMORE – (Satire News) – According to the Daily Dirt, Marjorie Taylor Greene was in The Crab Cake Capital of the World stocking up on crab cakes and getting some much-needed work on her pubic region (very private). She was asked by DD reporter…
Read full storyMy Pillow To Go Bankrupt Because of It’s Asshole CEO Michael Lindell
CHICAGO – (Satire News) – The Chicago Daily Wind has just announced that Michael Lindell, CEO of the My Pillow Corporation, and man who would marry Donald Trump in a nano-second, is standing in deep dodo, as they say down in Arkansas. Lindell, who…
Read full storyGolfing Beauty Paige Spiranac Returns To The Ladies PGA With Her Sizzling Hot Glam and Sex-Appeal
AUGUSTA, Georgia – (Sports Satire) – The world of women's golf is extremely excited as one of it’s former members has returned and caught the attention of the viewing public. Paige Spiranac, the 28-year-old Colorado sexpot, is back and she is play…
Read full storyTexas Governor Greg Abbott Named The Biggest Asshole Governor of All-Time
DIME BOX, Texas – (Satire News) – People who know Greg Abbott personally say off-the-record, that he is the meanest, cruelest, most heartless, despicable person since Adolf Hitler; actually according to many political pundits, G.A. is a close second…
Read full storyTrae Young Has Been Given Full Ownership of the New York Knicks, Although It Seems Like He Took It
New York Knicks owner James Dolan, who most people know from the Spike Lee incident at Madison Square Garden, has awarded full ownership of the team to Atlanta Hawks point guard Trae Young. This includes Madison Square Garden, all copyrights, and all…
Read full storyThree Men Arrested For Molesting Three Giant Goldfish
WOODPECKER BAY, Florida – (Satire News) – Boom Boom News has revealed that three fishermen from Georgia have been arrested by members of the Woodpecker Bay Police Department. The three individuals, who work for the Diddling Dixie Sheetrock Company…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Denies That Her Nipples Are Inverted
BROOKLYN – (Satire News) – Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene, who has become the most hated woman in the entire country was in Brooklyn to see her gynecologist. Pico de Gallo with Tittle Tattle Tonight caught up with MTG and asked her if she ev…
Read full storyRussia Has a Sure-Fire Plan To Discourage Homosexuality
MOSCOW – (Satire News) – The Kremlin has announced that they will no longer tolerate the comingling between same-sexers. Stavros Nickavich, spokesperson for the Kremlin, has made it clear that Moscow is not San Francisco, and anyone who wants to k…
Read full storySexual Predator Ghislaine Maxwell Says Prison Has Turned Her Into A Flaming Lipstick Lesbian
OSSINING, New York – (Satire News) – The biggest female sexual predator of our time, Ghislaine Maxwell, was recently interviewed by a reporter with The Channel 69 Eye Gazer News, in her cell at Sing Sing Federal Prison for Women. Maxwell told Cha…
Read full storyPresident Biden Says That Donald Trump Will Be Wearing An Orange Prison Jumpsuit By Christmas
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – President Biden was recently asked what he really thinks about the man who lived in the White House right before him. Can you be more specific? he asked. Yes sir, the Racist-in-Chief, came the reply. Oh, ok…
Read full storyDairy Queen Closes It’s 3 Kabul Restaurants Due To Constant Daily Gunfire
KABUL, Afghanistan – (Business Satire) – Executives with the Dairy Queen franchise have stated that they are going to have to close their 3 DQ’s in the Afghanistan capital of Kabul. The Sandstone News Agency reported that half of the Mickey D's em…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene is Definitely The Most Horrible, Coyote-Ugly-Looking Space Cadet in The Entire USA
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Tabloid Today is reporting that in the history of the U.S. Congress, there has never been a meaner, more Naziesque, more hate-filled bitch or bastard than Marjorie Taylor Greene. TT’s Papaya Bamboo pointed out se…
Read full storyThe California Wildfires Are So Damn Hot That Fisherman Are Catching Fish That Are Already Cooked
MARILYN MONROE, California – (Satire News) – The hundreds of California wildfires continue to burn out of control. Ipso Facto News reports that meteorologists have verified that some of the fires including the Tinsel Town fire and the Avocado Vall…
Read full storyTexas Is Sending 900 Bulldozers To Fight The Out-of-Control California Wild Fires
AUSTIN – (Satire News) – The Texas Senate has announced that they have agreed to send 900 fire-fighting bulldozers to help fight the dozens of fast-moving wild fires in the Left Coast state. Senator Harmon K. Finstermund, a Democrat from Nacogdoch…
Read full storyTexas Is Crushing Voting Rights
First, it was women’s health rights, as in Roe v Wade, limiting women to receive a legal termination within the first 5 weeks of pregnancy. That was a Texas decision by men (Guess what?) who have never been or will ever be pregnant. Why did men e…
Read full storyNude Photos of Sarah Ferguson Have Surfaced In Birmingham, England
BIRMINGHAM, England – (UK News)- Scotland Yard has just been informed that a dozen X-rated photos of Sarah Ferguson, “The Duchess of York” have been found in a pawn shop in Birmingham. A spokesperson for Scotland Yard, Wilmington McWax, 43, inform…
Read full storyTexas Governor Abbott Is The Wizard Of Pregnancy
What if a 12-year-old girl, who hasn't started her menstrual cycle, is raped by a relative or neighbor? How could she know if she were pregnant before 5 weeks, Governor Abbott? What if there isn't a doctor in the area or a Planned Parenthood? Supp…
Read full storyCalifornia’s Dixie Land Fire Is So Huge It Can Be Seen From Saturn
AVOCADO HEIGHTS, California – (Satire News) – Planetary scientists now say that the Dixie Land Fire is so gigantic that it can be seen from as far off as Saturn (a distance of over 742 million miles, as the crow flies). The “Fire From Hell” as the…
Read full storyToyota Using Ass-Kicking Taliban in New Ads
Tokyo, Japan - The Toyota Motor Corporation unleashed a new commercial today, marketed towards Authoritarian regimes and Dictators around the globe. The commercial plays heavily on the recent success of the Taliban in Afghanistan. A victory that c…
Read full storyChic-fil-A Says That Due To The Employee Shortage They May Be Forced To Hire Inmates Who Are On Parole
CHICAGO – (Satire News) – BuzzFuzz reports that one of the biggest fast food corporations is having trouble hiring (and keeping) employees. Agatha Agave, a spokeswoman for the fast food giant, told Sonora Cahoots, with BuzzFuzz that young people j…
Read full storyA Montreal College Cheerleader Injures Her Camel Toe During a Very Difficult Cheerleading Maneuver
MONTREAL – (Sports Satire) – The local newspapers are reporting that the head cheerleader for the Montreal Jr. College Beavers hurt her pubic region when a very difficult cheerleading maneuver went horribly wrong. Joanie F. Mackinberger, 19, was t…
Read full storyGerman Loony freezes his sperm in freezer and his freezer conked out!
Wiesbaden, Germany: A rather eccentric, scientific experiment, ended in disaster as German Nutter, Friedrich von Schmitz (real name, Freddy Schmitz, common as muck), decided to freeze his sperm in his own freezer so he could be reincarnated after he…
Read full storyToyota Develops The New Military Tank Cycle
SAN ANTONIO – (Satire News) – The Toyota Corporation has just developed the new, state-of-the-art military Patton 17 Tank Cycle X. The new military war machine was tested out recently in Iran against Isis soldiers who ran for the hills (or rather…
Read full storyShot Of Botox Versus Shot Of Covid Vaccine?
Why do some anti-vax people use Botox to eliminate lines and wrinkles but reject the Covid-19 vaccine that can save their life? Botox is made from a toxin. "Set it up, Joe. Let me have a shot between the eyes and get rid of my 11's.
Read full storyA 27-Year-Old Woman Bowler in Baltimore Bowls a Perfect 300 Game Using a Baseball
BALTIMORE – (Sports Satire) – A 27-year-old female bowler in Baltimore has just bowled what is perhaps the most amazing bowling game in the history of the 10-pin sport. Sportsapalooza reporter Pia Confetti, reported that Lila P. Festivus, who is a…
Read full storyIkea UK reports empty shelves and Brits are now sleeping on ancient, sagging, yellow stained, Made in UK mattresses!
Post Brexit consequences are being swept under the carpet (not made in the EU, Made in Iran) as UK mega-large retailers are beginning to complain that their shelves are becoming emptier and emptier! Brit supermarket shoppers are hoarding olive oil…
Read full storyA Fighting Bull In The Mexicali Bullring Jumps Into The Stands and Attacks Dozens of Spectators, Including a Taco Vendor, a Beer Vendor, and a PETA Representative
MEXICALI, Mexico – (Sports Satire) – Mexico’s Las Maracas News Agency has commented that during the last fight of the afternoon, the featured bull, named El Bravisimo Numero Ocho, suddenly lost his footing and ended up in the first row of the Salma H…
Read full storyPinocchio The Puppet
The best version: Long ago, an old satanist named Geppetto was caught shoplifting in his village. He was sent to a dungeon where he was tortured without mercy. His hands and head were put in a Pillory and afterwards fire ants were placed on them w…
Read full storyBezos-Musk Inc. Wants To Buy Manchester United
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – The largest company in the entire world, Bezos-Musk, Inc., has just made an offer to purchase England’s most popular football team (soccer in the US), the Manchester United Red Devils. Jeff Bezos said that althoug…
Read full storyMeghan Markle Arrested At Santa Monica Beach
Things just seem to go from bad to worse for former British royal family member, the ex-Duchess of Sussex, Meghan Markle, after the latest news that she has been arrested by uniformed officers at the Santa Monica beach in Los Angeles on Sunday, and c…
Read full storyThe Reason That The Taliban Closed Three McDonald’s Restaurants
KABUL – (Business Satire) – Afghanistan’s Sandstone News Agency reports that Taliban spokesperson Sabeen Siri Yasim has informed the world-wide news media that the new regime has shut down three Mickey D’s. When asked why, Sabeen Siri Yasim simply…
Read full storyMelania Trump Tells Sean Hannity She’s Filing For Divorce
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The nation’s First Lady called in to the "Sean Hannity Show," and informed him that she has finally decided to file for divorce from Donald Johnny Trump. Mrs. Trump told the Fox News host that she has had it wit…
Read full storyWeirdo International Space Station Gets Special Delivery From Enabler SpaceX
SpaceX has sent up another supply ship to the International Space Station, (because NASA is too busy doing their nails), but an increasingly bizarre list of supply items is raising eyebrows. The Falcon rocket, launched on August 29 from Elon Musk'…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Flat Out Denies That She Has a Swastika Tattoo on Her Bikini Line
MUFFIN BUSH, New Jersey – (Satire News) – One of the most hated women in the entire nation, Marjorie “Horseface” Taylor Greene told CNN’s Don Lemon that she is getting sick and tired of all of the rumors that the California rumor mills are putting ou…
Read full storyRepublicans Lose Minds Over Biden Vaccine Mandate
“Stop medical tyranny.” - Real medical tyranny advised people to drink Clorox and Lysol, but Republicans never said peep over that. So who needs a vaccine anyway? Well, who goes into a battle without a rifle? The Covid pandemic is a battle. A…
Read full storyPresident Biden Donates His Entire $400,000 Presidential Salary To 2 Very Worthy Causes
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – As every American voter knows by now comparing Trump to President Biden is like comparing a Mississippi jackass to a Kentucky thoroughbred. There just is NO fucking comparison! President Biden is very intelli…
Read full storyPresident Biden Says He Is Sick and Tired of Trump and His Never-Ending Lies And So He Is Going To Show The Orange Bitch Who The Boss Is
BALTIMORE – (Satire News) – President Biden was in Baltimore to help dedicate the new, President and Mrs. Joe Biden High School, which is a state-of-the-art school of higher learning. He was asked by reporters about the on-going crisis between Chi…
Read full storyIt's Switzerland's Turn To Invade Afghanistan
Switzerland is about to invade Afghanistan. The reasoning is Afghanistan must be invaded by someone, and Switzerland felt they had to get into the action before Canada or Finland. And besides, what else does Switzerland have to do all day besides…
Read full storyThe Washington Football Team, Formerly The Redskins, Tease Their Brand New Name
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Sports Satire) – According to The Sports Bet Gazette, there is no more troubled owner in the world of sports, than Daniel Marc Synder, owner of the Washington Football Team, formerly known as The Washington Redskins. Snyder has…
Read full story"Is that it then?" Asks sad swingball
After spending the summer in the garden, slightly rusty swingball set Leonardo Flumpski is feeling slightly sad. 'Yes. there I was' said Flumpski 'standing in the garden, waiting for someone to play with me, I mean people don't even need a partner…
Read full storyA List of 10 Things About Meghan Markle That No One Knows
Since moving to America, Meghan Markle and her husband Prince Harry have become one of the most popular couples in the nation, including Beyonce and Jay-Z. They have rubbed elbows with the likes of Jeff Bezos, LeBron James, Oprah Winfrey, Bob Baf…
Read full storyCeline Dion Down To 81 Pounds Insists She Is Not Anorexic
LAS VEGAS – (Entertainment Satire) – Close friends of songstress Celine Dion are extremely worried about her, as she has dipped down to a skinny-as-hell 81 pounds. A member of her Las Vegas band, who begged not to have his name released, said that…
Read full storyIce Cream Maker Brought Vagina Cream Mainstream
The Great British Ice Cream Company food scientists explain how they created the new vulva Phish Food flavor by unlocking the secrets to their Vagina Cream Swirl. Male and lesbian customers were nothing but grateful when The Great British Ice C…
Read full storyBuzzFuzz Has Uncovered a Box Full of Nude Photos of Paula Deen
HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – BuffFuzz has just received a box full of naked pictures of Paula Deen, that were taken back when she was the head cheerleader at Johnny Reb College in Burnt Corn, Alabama. The photos which were sent to BuzzFuzz by UPS w…
Read full storyThat book could have been a bit shorter, say book group
Members of Chutney on the Fritz's book club, which meets at the Hipster and Farrow pub in Grange Lane, have all said that their latest choice 'How to do something to some people and get away with it' could have been a bit shorter. Former teacher,…
Read full storyThe Aberdeen Sea Wolves Defeat The Killarney Archers In The Scottish-Irish Football League’s Opener
ABERDEEN, Scotland – (Sports Satire) – The reigning champions of the Scottish-Irish Football League, the Aberdeen Sea Wolves, easily defeated their long time rivals the Killarney Archers 6-2. The game was held at the newly remodeled Mrs. Sean Conn…
Read full storyTo Combat Methane, Biden Giving Every Home A Labrador Retriever
Washington, D.C.—Climate scientists all agree that food waste is a massive contributor to methane, which goddamnit, also causes global warming. Just in time for Glasgow's big COP26 Climate Meeting, Biden has a plan to make it all go away. And ye…
Read full storyTrump Switches From Twitter to PornHub Comments Section
WASHINGTON- The followers of President Donald J. Trump are still recovering from a shock caused by the news of an unjustified and brutal Twitter ban. If only they knew that the President and what’s left of his staff have been working on creative and…
Read full storyAaron Rodgers and Danica Patrick Are Getting Back Together
GREEN BAY – (Sports Satire) – The word on the streets and the cheese shops of Green Bay is that Packers quarterback and his ex-NASCAR girlfriend Danica Patrick are getting back together. The two dated last year and even had a reality show called A…
Read full storyWoman has the birdie song as an ear-worm
Penny Farthing, a 39-year-old woman about town has told people that she currently has The Birdie Song as an earworm. 'I had a really bad fever dream last night, remembering a family wedding, and seeing Uncle Derek dancing to the Birdie Song, and n…
Read full storyNancy Pelosi Discovered Masturbating In Capitol Building Horror
A male intern administrative assistant working in the Capitol Building in Washington DC has walked in on his boss, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, masturbating in her office, according to unverified rumors circulating online. Marvin Shawshank says hi…
Read full storyCaitlyn Jenner Announces She’s Engaged To a Member of Donald Trump’s Base
RANCHO SANCHO, California – (Satire News) – Ipso Facto News reports that trangender/transsexual Caitlyn Jenner is thrilled to announce that (s)he has become engaged. The former Bruce Jenner, told IFN’s Redwood Fingerboo, that her fiancé is Harvey…
Read full storyMan living his life like it is a choose your own adventure book, again
Derek Smallwood is living his life as if it is a choose your own adventure book, even though the last time he tried it it was a disaster. Derek revealed the story in his recently Amazon Kindle Published best-seller, CYOA - Just Do it, wherewith e…
Read full storyOprah Winfrey Interviews The Extremely Hateful Marjorie Taylor Greene
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – It is no secret that Marjorie Taylor Greene has become the most hated, despised, piece-of-shit politician in the entire United States, and there are lots of them! The National Whispers News Agency has just named Mar…
Read full storyWoman with dreadful taste in music has bought two new albums from the top ten
Mavis Davidson has always known that she has a bad taste in music, but for the first time in her life, she has actually bought two albums that are high in the music charts. 'Yes' said a clearly delighted Mavis 'I have the new albums by Steps and A…
Read full storyCitizen Donald Trump Is Selling All of His McDonalds Restaurants
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) – The ex-resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in Washington, D.C., spoke with GOPicky Magazine. He was asked how he felt now, being a plain, simple, ordinary citizen. The former president made a face, and rep…
Read full storyMan curating his pencil shavings collection
Brian Asshat, Chutney on the Fritz's most colourful character will spend today curating his pencil shavings, after sneezing on them last night. 'Yes, it is a complete nightmare' wrote Brian on his blog 'I sneezed, and my carefully curated collecti…
Read full storyFirst non-binary computer introduced
It is the largest milestone in computing since the invention of the internet-enabled fridge. This week, computer manufacturer BigHard has developed the world's first non-binary computer. The computer is called Bernard, but prefers to use the prono…
Read full storyHere’s A Nightmare: Joe Biden Impeached
The situation in Afghanistan is a mess. Joe Biden spoke the truth about getting U.S. troops out of a twenty-year war on the other side of the world. But, unfortunately there appeared to be no planning for the U.S. exit. Biden's dog Major might have b…
Read full storyA Great White Shark is Spotted in the Canals of Venice, Italy
VENICE, Italy – (World News) – Scientists are puzzled-as-hell as to how the hell, a 16-foot great white shark ended up in the canals of Venice. The shark was seen by two different gondoliers who remarked that the shark looked exactly like the one…
Read full storyQAnon's Marjorie Taylor Greene is Hated as Much as Ann Coulter, Donald Trump, and Mustafa Haliboo Combined
DICKWEED, Mississippi – (Satire News) – Marjorie Taylor Greene self-proclaimed darling of the QAnon movement and human tampon, has just become even more hated than Ann Coulter, Donald Trump, and Al Qaeda leader Mustafa Haliboo. The sewer water blo…
Read full storyVice-President Kamala Harris Has Just Tagged Marjorie Taylor Greene With a Brand New Nickname That Fits Her Like a Latex Glove
SAUSALITO, California – (Satire News) – The vice-president was in Sausalito at a high school dedication. The citizens of the town of Sausalito, decided to rename Ronald Reagan High School to Kamala Harris High School. Needless to say VP Harris…
Read full storyVice President Harris to address a bowl of tuna salad
The Vice President will travel to the headquarters of Subway sandwich shops to talk to a “large, restaurant style bowl of the famous Subway tuna salad.” A spokesperson for the Vice president emphasized that he bowl “was quite large and was the…
Read full storyMelania Trump Resigns
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – iRumors is reporting that the first lady, Melania Trump, has resigned her position as the executive director of the Be Best Organization and can hardly wait to get her ass out of the White House, which she has desc…
Read full storySitcom Writer loses place on the moral high ground
After posting something on Twitter, a man vaguely famous for writing a sitcom that is little remembered realises that he no longer has the moral high ground. Speaking to us over zoom he said 'Yes, I know my show was cancelled, because the BBC was…
Read full storyNASCAR’S 1st Transgender Driver Wins Her First Race
TOLEDO, Ohio – (Sports Satire) – The NASCAR organization is proud to announce that the Toledo 300 Invitational was won by the organization’s very first transgender driver. Twenty-eight-year-old Catalina Puffinpick captured the coveted race from a…
Read full storyTiger Woods Seriously Hurt In Masturbation Accident
The world of professional golf was on tenterhooks tonight, after the former world number one player, Tiger Woods, was reported to have been admitted to hospital in a critical condition after being seriously injured whilst 'spanking his monkey'. Wo…
Read full storyPresident Biden Is Sending a Naval Flotilla Off The Coast of China
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki informed the news media that the president has made good on his promise to protect the island of Japan. POTUS has sent some strong messages to Chinese President Xi Jinping an…
Read full storyNASCAR Openly Welcomes Its First Transgender Race Car Driver
DAYTONA BEACH, Florida – (Sports Satire) – NASCAR was founded in 1948, and now after 73 years, the National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing is proudly boasting that they are finally getting with the racing program. Sports Territory Magazine…
Read full story#DeleteFacebook! Facebook Group Deleted
A Facebook Group created calling for a boycott of Facebook after it took the extraordinary step of banning users in Australia from accessing news in a row over paying for content, has been deleted, by Facebook. 'Delete Facebook', 'Boycott Zuckerbe…
Read full storyRussia’s Most Advanced Stealth Bomber Flies Across The United Kingdom Totally Undetected
LONDON – (Satire News) – England’s Tickety Boo News is reporting lots of red faces at 10 Downing Street, Buckingham Palace, and Wembley Stadium. TBN reporter Brompton Boxgrove, stated that the Royal Air Force has admitted that a Russian Stealth Bo…
Read full storyThe World’s First Transgender Sumo Wrestler Gets Her Ass Kicked
KAGOSHIMA, Japan – (Sports Satire) – The Saki-Saki News Agency has stated that the world’s first transgender wrestler, Yamaha Wasabi, 37, has lost for the first time in her 12-month career. Wasabi, who weighs a whopping 521 pounds, was clobbered b…
Read full storyTexas And Taliban Women’s Rights
While the roaming Taliban men use their whips on women who are not fully covered, Texas is forcing women who are victims of rape or incest to give birth to unwanted pregnancies. While the Texas legislators have not okayed stoning women for pre-ma…
Read full storyOprah Winfrey Lands An Exclusive Interview With Donald J. Trump
NEW YORK CITY – (Magazine Satire) - The woman who has interviewed more famous people than even Barbara Walters, recently sat down with a man who says he came very close to becoming America’s first king, Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump. OPRAH: Well h…
Read full storyDelaware’s Naked Bingo Night is a Huge Success
DELAWARE PUNCH, Delaware – (Entertainment Satire) – The state of Delaware has just revealed that its brand new Naked Bingo Night has proved to be a tremendous success. State Attorney General Kathy Jennings informed the news media that when the ide…
Read full storyA Volcano Is Discovered In Lake Michigan
CHICAGO – (Satire News) – US meteorologists from Maine to Oregon are puzzled-as-hell at the discovery of a volcano that has suddenly formed overnight in Lake Michigan. The Alpha Beta News Agency was the first news outlet to report on the volcano,…
Read full storyGov. Greg Abbott of Texas Has Just Used a Hell of a Lot of State Taxpayers Money To Pay For His Brand New Customized $487,000 Wheel Chair
AUSTIN – (Satire News) – The governor of Texas, who was recently named “The Biggest Asshole Governor of All-Time” by the Chicago Daily Wind newspaper, has just had the unmitigated gall to use nearly half a million dollars of state taxpayers money to…
Read full storyThe Three Little Pigs and The Gay Wolf
The best version: Once upon a time there was a mother pig who had three little pigs named Corn, Biscuit and Doughnut. Her husband was a vagrant who would listen to pop music all day and who failed school. One day she said to them, "It's time…
Read full storyA 7 Million-Year-Old Nipple Fish Discovered In Lake Michigan
MUSKEGON, Michigan – (Satire News) – A fisherman has just discovered what is believed to be the last existing Nipple Fish in existence. Andrew “Fishy” Attapooni, 47, caught the fish which is believed to be 7-million-years-old. He said he was us…
Read full storyRussia and China Are Planning on Jointly Invading Japan
MOSCOW – (Satire News) – Word has leaked out of the Kremlin that two of the world’s super powers are finalizing plans to invade Japan. A Kremlin insider, who would only give his initials X.V.Z, told BuzzFuzz that Russia and China are in serious ne…
Read full storyTed Cruz Has Been Banned From All Taco Bells
GUCAMOLE GROVE, Caifornia – (Satire News) – The news media is reporting that the Taco Bell board of directors has just voted 27-1 to ban Ted Cruz from getting within 75 feet of Taco Bell property. Board member Antonio Lopez de San Saludos, remarke…
Read full storyThe In-N-Out Burger Franchise Will Be Changing Its Name
AVOCADO HEIGHTS, California – (Business Satire) – The Left Coast hamburger chain known as In-N-Out has just announced that it is in the process of changing it’s corporate name. The change, according to Mimosa Sabrosa with the Alpha Beta News Agenc…
Read full storyToday's Most Popular Dog Name in the U.S. is ______
If you guessed Biden, you’re close. The most popular dog name today is Brandon. This is not too surprising since one of the most popular slogans in parts of the country is: Let’s go Brandon. That is supposedly equivalent to or at least mostly…
Read full storyPutin Reveals That He Has Always Seen Trump as Nothing But a Submissive Pussy
MOSCOW – (Satire News) – Moscow’s Red Press has just confirmed that Russian President Vladimir Putin has always looked upon Donald Trump as nothing more than a pathetic, little submissive pussy, who has the biggest inferiority complex of anyone on ea…
Read full storyAre Greeks and Italians White?
Yes, this is a real question, and one seriously debated in a recent UN Sponsored scholarly convocation at the request, it is said, of certain influential officials of southern European ancestry who wished to be classified as persons of color (POC).
Read full storyElon Musk Reveals That Tesla Has Just Developed An Electric Self-Driving 30-Passenger Bus
AUSTIN – (Satire News) – The Alpha Beta News Agency recently interviewed Elon Musk, and asked about his new all-electric self-driving passenger bus. Musk told reporter Mimosa Sabrosa that the bus will comfortably accommodate 30 passengers, and it…
Read full storyThe U.S. Navy Is sending The Powerful Aircraft Carrier The USS Barack Obama To The Mediterranean To Defend Israel Against An Attack From Libya
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Press Secretary Jen Psaki informed the White House press corps that President Biden is not going to tolerate Libya’s warmongering posture. POTUS stated that the CIA intercepted a message, that Libya is planning a…
Read full storyAustralia Is Hit By A Devastating Category 7 Typhoon
BRISBANE, Australia – (Satire News) – Australia’s Boomerang News Agency has just put out that the typhoon that just hit the country is one of the most powerful on record. KNA reported that the typhoon, named Keith, in honor of Keith Urban, struck…
Read full storyElon Musk Will Lead a Group of Volunteers To Colonize The Moon Very Soon
AUSTIN – (Satire News) – One of the world’s foremost space explorers recently told Alpha Beta News Agency’s Mimosa Sabrosa of his next space exploratory goal. As of September, 2021, Musk is the second richest man in the world, right behind Amazon’…
Read full storyOne of The Largest Meteors In History Is Heading Towards Alabama
DUCK DUNG, Alabama – (Satire News) – Ipso Facto News reports that it has just learned from information guru Andy Cohen, that one of the biggest meteors in the history of the world is speeding towards Earth, and is expected to hit the state of Alabama…
Read full storyFive Guys Burgers Adds a Partner And Will Now Become Six Guys Burgers
IN-A-GADDA-DA-VIDA, Virginia – (Satire News) – Five Guys Burgers first came into being in 1986, and now 35 years later, they have just announced that they will be changing their corporate name. Five Guys executives state that effective immediately…
Read full storySperm Bank Triples Its Business with Its New Mobile In-Home Sperm Collection Program
BEVERLY HILLS – (Business Satire) – The Come As You Are Sperm Bank of Beverly Hills proudly announces that it’s business has increased by a little over 300%. Sperm bank director, Olivia Tiburon, told Pico de Gallo, with Tittle Tattle Tonight, that…
Read full storyArrest Warrant Issued For Donald J. Trump For Inciting A Riot
The DC police department issued an arrest warrant for Donald J. Trump for inciting a riot. Bellyaching since he lost the presidential election on November 3, 2020, Trump called for the Proud Boys and every other unemployed supporter to march to t…
Read full storyElon Musk's Space X’s "Imagination-4" Returns Triumphantly After a Successful 3-Day Orbit
CAPE CANAVERAL, Florida – (Satire News) - A team of 4 unprofessional astronauts who lifted off on board the Falcon-9 rocket "Imagination-4," from the President Joseph “Joey” Biden Launch Complex 39-IUD at the Kennedy Space Center for a 3-day explorat…
Read full storyPfizer denies Covid-19 vaccine has Viagra content!
After several reports of weird 'side effects' being noted by doctors observing lucky first vaccinated patients, they decided to contact the producers, pharmaceutical giants Pfizer, to ask why ageing males have suddenly been fondling young female nurs…
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