Funny story: China's Military Aspirations A Concern Says Wee Jimmy Krankie

China's Military Aspirations A Concern Says Wee Jimmy Krankie

China’s military capabilities are growing deadlier and more technologically sophisticated, says former cabaret and TV star, Wee Jimmy Krankie. China is likely training for bombing strikes against American targets, and also strengthening its nuclear c...

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Funny story: Redundancies At Travelling Circus As Virus Lockdown Hits Tourism

Redundancies At Travelling Circus As Virus Lockdown Hits Tourism

Citing a lack of visitors, spiralling food costs, and other financial issues due to the current global pandemic, Tatty Mullett's Travelling Circus and Freak Show announced they would be laying off nearly seventy members of staff, including clowns, f...

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Funny story: Self-Isolating 50-Year-Old Bachelor Reflects On Life

Self-Isolating 50-Year-Old Bachelor Reflects On Life

Self-isolating Blackpool bachelor, John Hunt, 50, is dwelling and reflecting on his past, according to reports emanating from the northern seaside town. Hunt, who lives alone, is nostalgically reflecting on happier times, such as when he was a membe...

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Funny story: Overzealous UK Police Launch Operation Powertrip

Overzealous UK Police Launch Operation Powertrip

Assistant Commissioner Neil Basu demanded that officers maintain the British tradition of 'policing by consent', despite launching 'Operation Powertrip', the plan that calls for the harassment of joggers and easter egg shoppers, and the random shooti...

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Funny story: Thousands Naming Newborns After Virus

Thousands Naming Newborns After Virus

Thanks to the coronavirus, Corano has grabbed the No. 1 spot on Babynames.com list of most popular male baby names of 2020 so far. Sanitizrella was the most popular girl's name. "The overwhelming news saturation of the virus led to the popular...

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Funny story: Man's Ford Capri Has Coronavirus

Man's Ford Capri Has Coronavirus

A man in Bradford has said that his car, which he has been driving for more than forty years, has come down with the Coronavirus. Phil Riddiough, 62, has been driving his yellow Ford Capri, Maisie, to and from work - and other places - since 1978,...

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Funny story: Woman intrigued by man walking past her window

Woman intrigued by man walking past her window

Since she is now in lock-down, Hull-based hairdresser, Donna Brassingthwaite, is finding a man walking past her house increasingly intriguing. She told us: 'I watch him walk past my door every morning at about 11.30pm. Obviously, he could have bee...

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Funny story: Comedy legend Eddie Large dies

Comedy legend Eddie Large dies

The world of showbusiness was in mourning today, when one of the greatest comedians who ever lived sadly passed away. Eddie Large, 78, died of coronavirus yesterday. He was famous during the 80s as the loud half of double act Little and Large. "He...

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Funny story: Nightmare Coronavirus Succession Scenario Could See Meghan Crowned Queen

Nightmare Coronavirus Succession Scenario Could See Meghan Crowned Queen

The Prince of Wales has tested positive for coronavirus, Clarence House has announced, resulting in a revised succession schedule that could see Prince Harry and Meghan Markle being crowned King and Queen, while living abroad in Canada. Prince Ch...

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Funny story: Man swims to the Moon in his bathtub

Man swims to the Moon in his bathtub

Bored of being stuck indoors due to the coronavirus, Gloucester man Geoff Sweat, decided to perform a feat never before attempted - to swim the distance to the Moon in his bathtub. Mr Sweat, 41, has an Olympic-sized bathtub in his basement, and, d...

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Funny story: Coronary Heart Disease Patients Worried Their Condition Sounds Like Coronavirus

Coronary Heart Disease Patients Worried Their Condition Sounds Like Coronavirus

Patients suffering from coronary heart disease have said they are concerned that their illness sounds too much like the Coronavirus, and the unfortunate similarity is making them nervous. Sixteen sufferers from Coventry also said that its allocate...

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Funny story: Haggis ignore social-distancing

Haggis ignore social-distancing

Coppers have arrested a gaggle of raucous haggis who decided to turn deaf ear to new social-distancing regulations by having a tear-up on Glen Tilt. Authorities arrived at scenes of utter degradation just after one o’clock this morning, after bein...

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Seven day catch up

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Funny story: Non-Hipster now has a hipster beard

Non-Hipster now has a hipster beard

Non-hipster, Barry Gillespie, a 46-year-old senior accountant from Mithering on the Trent, has grown a hipster beard, even though he never wanted one. The hirsute former bank worker, is currently missing the Stray Ferret domino's team, but feels h...

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Funny story: Game of Swingball becoming increasingly violent

Game of Swingball becoming increasingly violent

What started out as a friendly game of Swingball has turned increasingly violent, as Thomas Johnson and his dad, Gary, discuss the finer points of gamesmanship. 'It was all going so well,' said Thomas, 'but Dad got into a bit of a strop when he hi...

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Funny story: Family saving box set of Last of the Summer Wine

Family saving box set of Last of the Summer Wine

Mother and father, Gary and Lorraine Johnson, are saving their family box set of Last of the Summer Wine for either, when son, Thomas, 14, is able to enjoy it for the comedy classic that it is, or the family get so bored during Lockdown, that it is u...

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Funny story: Ethiopia to hold benefit concert for Brits

Ethiopia to hold benefit concert for Brits

Musicians in Ethiopia are coming together to hold a benefit concert on Wednesday, to raise money for people in the UK impacted upon by the coronavirus. The concert named “Now It's Your Turn", will be held on Wednesday at the Addis Ababa Stadium.

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Funny story: Sacred Gifts for the Homeless

Sacred Gifts for the Homeless

With the corona lockdown, curfews and general ruling of not being allowed to do anything or go anywhere, Church attendance figures have nosedived even further. In fact, the current average across British chapels and temples is nil. This worrying deve...

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Funny story: Nurses get the clap from grateful patients

Nurses get the clap from grateful patients

In a moment of national dignity, nurses and other NHS workers, who have been selflessly working flat out in this time of crisis, were warmly given the clap by grateful patients. One male patient said, "When she saw me struggling to breathe through...

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Funny story: Penis Jokes: the Problem and the Cure

Penis Jokes: the Problem and the Cure

As a spoof writer, Geoff Todger likes penis jokes. He gets his out at any opportunity, and stuffs it into every story, regardless of whether it is related to penises or not. "I usually love to show off my penis jokes. No matter what I'm writing ab...

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Funny story: Man Felt A Bit Of A Fool

Man Felt A Bit Of A Fool

There was confusion and a certain sense of torrid self-consciousness about one man when he woke up and got out of bed on Wednesday morning, leaving him uncertain as to what was wrong with him. The situation unfolded in the early hours after the ge...

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