Life still isn't a choose your own adventure book
A man who found out to his cost that life still isn’t a choose-your-own-adventure story is telling people on his blog. Bumbling buffoon Gene Daffney took out a dice and rolled it, leaving his fate to chance. Instead of going to work for a week…
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Teasmaid going to its sixth car boot sale
Teasmaid Jacqui Smith has returned unsold from her fifth car boot sale and will be trying again tomorrow. The relic of a bygone era, car boot sales were the old-school eBay, without all of the palavers of postage. Jacqui, who has been sadly gather…
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Prince Harry, son of King Charles III, says he was snubbed by the royal family and he will never set foot in England again
Prince Harry attended the royal coronation of his father to honor him, but he says that upon reflection, he would have preferred to have stayed in America and taken his family to eat at The La Brea Tar Pits Diner. The Prince, who is a big fan of T…
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Old people remembering the Coronation of their youth
83-year-old Edna and 79-year-old Tom, stalwarts of the Wet Sprocket pub in Mithering on the Trent, are both reminiscing about the previous coronation in 1953. "Do you remember that day?" asked Tom. "I do. I remember my neighbors had to hire the te…
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Andy Dung, a school wierdo, makes a Big Mac
A MCDONALD’S fan Andy Dung, who believes he has the ultimate “Big Mac hack” has been called a lunatic by his school mates. Everton East ghetto dweller, Sir Andy Dung, whose Dad brought him home after a stay at a state mental hospital has claimed…
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All British beer to dry up and all pubs to close by Michaelmas
On par with telling an American that their Second Amendment will be erased and all their guns taken away, the people of Britain will soon be up in arms this coming September when all beer production will stop and all pubs closed. This is coming fr…
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A new island rises between Britain and Europe
The Archers' cricket team, it must be the summer then
Elton John caught with an inflatable doll at Heathrow Airport
Tom from MySpace was never really your friend
Did King Charles III Invite Anyone From The Spoof To Attend His Coronation?
Lesbian Frankenstein Monster Terrorizes London
Sensitivity Reader now Desensitised
Man realises his high horse is lame
Mick Lynch Wins UK Bowling Championship After Record Number Of Strikes
Judi Dench to be the face on the new £1 coin
BoJo gone cuckoo
The Spoof Press Cleared By British Courts Of Illegal Eavesdropping, Hacking Or Wire Tapping
The United Kingdom's 19th Heavy Artillery Tank Regiment defeats Russia's 3rd St. Petersburg Volunteer Regiment
The Twickenham Times Telegram Newspaper's intrepid reporter, Tango Brisket, provides a unique glimpse into the valiant exploits of the 19th Heavy Artillery Tank Regiment during his six-month embedded assignment. Brisket's observations underscore t…
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King Charles Said To Harry: “I’m Not A Bank!”
Demanding additional money daily from his sixteen-bathroom, $15 million Montecito home, Prince Charles slammed his foot down on his Aston Martin brakes and told his son, Harry, “I am not a bank!” Bravo, King Charles! Raise the Union Jack! Imagi…
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Postage stamp released to honor Queen Elizabeth
The True Dat News Agency reports that King Charles III has just announced a new postage stamp to pay tribute to his late mum, Queen Elizabeth. According to TDNA writer Reggie Rickenracker, the stamp is no ordinary creation. It features a whimsical…
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Royal submarine, the HMS Sea Scoundrel, hits a school of orca whales and receives heavy damage
Ta Ta For Now News reveals that the royal submarine, HMS Sea Scoundrel II, has sustained extensive damage after an unexpected collision with a pod of orca whales. The submarine's commander, none other than Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex, 38, explain…
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King Charles hints that he may put Windsor Castle up for sale
In a shocking revelation, Ta Ta For Now News reporter Petula Tart unveils the surprising decision of the King to put the historic Windsor Castle up for sale. The King explained to Miss Tart, the 954-year-old castle is facing an array of challenges…
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King Charles III, invites President Biden to visit Buckingham Palace
Tickety Boo News reporter Grover Buck reveals that King Charles III has extended a warm invitation to President Biden for a visit to Buckingham Palace. During the visit, the distinguished pair intends to discuss the ongoing Russian invasion of Ukr…
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The holy medieval Merlin shall never die!
And lo! They did bring out the Holy Hand Grenade, and all cheered and bowed low and kissed the earth that was trod upon by the King... How medieval is Britain? The nation itself was created by Merlin the Wizard in the year 3, and from then on, it…
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Like a bad penny, this fantasy movie has bad actors
And lo, the Lady of the Lake did come to the aid of the party, wielding a sword to establish government in the British Isles. The people, covered in mud from the majestic horses of the King, joyfully wiped it off as His Shortness and his Lady in Arms…
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King Charles did not enter Westminster Abbey playing a tambourine
Rumors were flying about the Coronation ceremony of King Charles. Will he or won’t he? Not King Charles, but Harry? Will Harry or won’t he? Will Harry actually go to his father’s Coronation? He didn’t want to be seated in Peterborough but wanted a…
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Meghan wants her own crown – NOW!
Despite media reports saying she wouldn't attend the coronation, Meghan Markle, or Merkle or MarkieMark, made an unexpected appearance. She stood, biting her tongue, as she gazed at the grandeur, trying to resist the urge to shout to the flying buttr…
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The mighty and manly king has a run in his stockings
King Charles had a run in his stocking, but he couldn't find a seamstress – the kind they had in the good old days of the 19th century, possibly a three-year-old covered in soot, smoking cigars, and hacking out a lung or two – so he must do it himsel…
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Experts say that Great Britain's Robin Hood Volcano could erupt at anytime
Esteemed geologist Abner "Flasher" Cockburn has raised the alarm about the newly formed Robin Hood Volcano, nestled in the picturesque English Channel just off the coast of Portsmouth. Flasher has expressed grave concerns that the volcano could unlea…
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What will you be doing at the Coronation?
What are your plans for the Coronation this year? Are you a monarchist, supporting everything that the King says? Did you buy Spare? Did you read it? Do you know anyone who bought Spare? Do you like them? What do you think of Camilla? Really? Well…
Read full storyLatest Spoof UK Headlines
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Agatha Christie fell in love with Ted Bundy
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It's been discovered that Religion is a lie
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Jack The Ripper was a Knights Templar
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Dominic Raab set to return the keys, and all of the AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA's
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Liberal Democrats won't disturb you again, until the next time
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Landscapers discover that Windsor Castle actually has a moat
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Suella’s speed is scraping her calloused heels
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Jacob Rees-Mogg wants more names
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Prince William says that the photo of him and the Soho pole dancer holding hands was photoshopped
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King Charles says that the clock in the Big Ben Tower will need to be replaced
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Michael Madeup's New Year Message
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The Fog In London Is So Thick Blackbirds Are Actually Eating It
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Queen Camilla: Squiffy is the head that wears the crown
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God smites Archbishop of Canterbury for speeding
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Michael Madeup's leaving speech
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Is there a lion lying in the middle of the road? 5 signs you are in a safari park
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King Arthur was a womanizer
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Government resigns over Phillip Schofield’s lying about an affair at work
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James Bond is a terrorist, but Pussy is galore
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King Charles says that he is seriously considering buying Wembley Stadium
