BEVERLY HILLS – (Business Satire) – The Come As You Are Sperm Bank of Beverly Hills proudly announces that it’s business has increased by a little over 300%.
Sperm bank director, Olivia Tiburon, told Pico de Gallo, with Tittle Tattle Tonight, that the idea for having a sperm bank employee collect the sperm in the privacy of one’s home was her grandfather’s.
She said that Granddaddy Gregory has had a bit of trouble getting around ever since the woodchuck attack back in May 2020.
Tiburon said that he asked her if there was any way that he could have his cum collected and sold, without leaving the comfort of his own home.
Mrs. Tiburon said there was, and that it was a fantastic idea, and so was born the Come-as-You-Are Sperm Bank’s Mobile In-Home Sperm Collection Program.
Customers say that this program is the greatest thing since reusable condoms.
Tiburon pointed out that her sperm bank has a special multi-sperm collecting program, where 2 or more males can schedule a group collection procedure at the same time, and get a 25% discount on the package deal.