There were 212 spoof news stories published in August 2021. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Funny story: Texas Governor Greg Abbott Named The Biggest Asshole Governor of All-Time

Texas Governor Greg Abbott Named The Biggest Asshole Governor of All-Time

DIME BOX, Texas – (Satire News) – People who know Greg Abbott personally say off-the-record, that he is the meanest, cruelest, most heartless, despicable person since Adolf Hitler; actually according to many political pundits, G.A. is a close second…

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Funny story: Events That Nearly Brought Down The Government

Events That Nearly Brought Down The Government

Since democrats are claiming the peaceful January 6th protest was an insurrection, and nearly brought down the government, I think it's time we created a list of other 'watershed' events that also nearly toppled democracy. Please add your own 'lif…

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Funny story: The United States House of Representatives Votes to Prohibit Travel to and From Florida

The United States House of Representatives Votes to Prohibit Travel to and From Florida

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Ipso Facto News reports that due to the huge rise in Delta Dawn Virus cases in the Plywood State, the House of Representatives has voted 234 to 201 to restrict travel to and from the state of Florida. Governor Ro…

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Funny story: Vice-President Kamala Harris Has Just Tagged Marjorie Taylor Greene With a Brand New Nickname That Fits Her Like a Latex Glove

Vice-President Kamala Harris Has Just Tagged Marjorie Taylor Greene With a Brand New Nickname That Fits Her Like a Latex Glove

SAUSALITO, California – (Satire News) – The vice-president was in Sausalito at a high school dedication. The citizens of the town of Sausalito, decided to rename Ronald Reagan High School to Kamala Harris High School. Needless to say VP Harris…

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Funny story: 'Amazion' sell millions of Hijabs in Afghanistan as Taliban run riot!

'Amazion' sell millions of Hijabs in Afghanistan as Taliban run riot!

Afghanistan, a nation filled with rugged mountains, valleys, and just happens to be the largest drug producing country on the planet is unconquerable proclaim the Taliban! Brits attempted to syphon off Afghanistan's major export many years ago but…

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Funny story: German OAP puts his Y-fronts on back to front and attempts to pee out of his slit!

German OAP puts his Y-fronts on back to front and attempts to pee out of his slit!

As one approaches the ripe old age of 85, simple things in life tend to become more complicated! A German OAP residing in Ravensburg, whose wife observed him doing the usual OAP things like: Putting his slippers in the fridge, not flushing the bog, f…

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Funny story: LPGA’s Sensational Sexy Sexpot Paige Spiranac Gets Invited To The White House After Winning The Indianapolis Invitational

LPGA’s Sensational Sexy Sexpot Paige Spiranac Gets Invited To The White House After Winning The Indianapolis Invitational

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Sports Satire) – White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki has informed the White House Press Corps that President Biden and First Lady Dr. Jill Biden have invited the stunningly sexy pro lady golfer Paige Spiranac to the White House…

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Funny story: Vice-President Harris Will Visit Afghanistan and Meet With The New Taliban Leader

Vice-President Harris Will Visit Afghanistan and Meet With The New Taliban Leader

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (U.S. Satire News) – The Chicago Wind newspaper has confirmed that VP Harris will be flying to Kabul, Afghanistan on Air Force One to have a private meeting with the top ranking Taliban leader. The vice-president is scheduled to…

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Funny story: A U.S. C-17 Cargo Plane Loaded With 917 Afghani Refugees Bound For New York City is Diverted To Montreal, Canada

A U.S. C-17 Cargo Plane Loaded With 917 Afghani Refugees Bound For New York City is Diverted To Montreal, Canada

NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Vice-President Harris, in her capacity as the second most-powerful person in the country, has announced that she has diverted an Afghani C-17 cargo plane loaded with close to 1,000 refugees that was headed to the USA t…

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Funny story: Kim Jong-un Wants In-N-Out Burger Restaurants in North Korea

Kim Jong-un Wants In-N-Out Burger Restaurants in North Korea

PYONGYANG, North Korea – (Satire News) – North Korea’s Rice Paddy News Agency has stated that North Korean leader Kim Jong-un has requested that the In-N-Out burger chain build several of their restaurants in North Korea. Kim Jong-un recently stat…

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Funny story: The US Chinese-American Federation of Chinese People Demand That The NBA Implement An Asian Player Quota

The US Chinese-American Federation of Chinese People Demand That The NBA Implement An Asian Player Quota

SAN FRANCISCO – (Sports Satire) - The organization known as The US Chinese-American Federation of Chinese People has issued a strong statement to the National Basketball Association. In a letter to NBA Commissioner Adam Silver, the group states t…

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Funny story: Political Correctness Gone Amuck: Dallas Cowboys Must Change Name

Political Correctness Gone Amuck: Dallas Cowboys Must Change Name

Following the Cleveland Indians and the Washington Redskins, the Dallas team in the National Football League has announced that when the season begins the team will no longer carry the nickname Cowboys. Until a new nickname is adopted, the team will…

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Funny story: A Hooters Girl With a Huge Mouth Is Noted For Giving The Best You-Know-Whats In Chattanooga

A Hooters Girl With a Huge Mouth Is Noted For Giving The Best You-Know-Whats In Chattanooga

CHATTANOOGA, Tennessee – (Satire News) – An employee of the national Hooters chain is noted for two things being able to speak six languages fluently, and for having the biggest, most amazing mouth on both sides of the Mississippi River. Daniella…

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Funny story: US Military Drones Totally Destroy Two Terrorist-Controlled Towns In Iraq

US Military Drones Totally Destroy Two Terrorist-Controlled Towns In Iraq

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The FBI and The CIA have confirmed that at least 16 American military drones invaded Iraq and destroyed 9 Iraqi military bases, 4 Iraqi bullet factories, 2 Iraqi Motel 6’s, and an Iraqi camelburger restaurant that w…

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Funny story: Elmer Smuckmeister Wins Olympic Cow Pie Throwing Gold Medal

Elmer Smuckmeister Wins Olympic Cow Pie Throwing Gold Medal

BILLINGSGATE POST: Not since Joe Cocolochek won the shot put gold medal in the 1936 Summer Olympics in Berlin, Germany, has anyone from Beaver Crossing, Nebraska, won an Olympic medal. Although overshadowed by Jesse Owens, who won gold medals in t…

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Funny story: Should New York Governor Cuomo Resign?

Should New York Governor Cuomo Resign?

The question is, as is often asked should Governor Andrew Cuomo resign or should he remain? Fast answer: He wasn't elected by the (covering all bases) maybe 100 women who presented sexual harassment charges and or complaints about his behavior. H…

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Funny story: Love Birds Guilty Of Inappropriate Sex Chatter: The Durham Report Alleges

Love Birds Guilty Of Inappropriate Sex Chatter: The Durham Report Alleges

BILLINGSGATE POST: After over two years and breathless speculation that John Durham would finally exonerate the Love Birds for engaging in inappropriate sexual chatter, it appears that the Justice Department will finally complete the long awaited re…

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Funny story: Football team unrecognizable after Messi departure: Fanatic

Football team unrecognizable after Messi departure: Fanatic

After the recent news of the departure of Lionel Messi from FC Barcelona many sports fans are left confused and intrigued about the future of their favorite star and of course team. This news came as a surprise to all our sports analysts that are…

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Funny story: President Biden Hires Donald Trump’s Niece, Mary Trump, To Be a CIA Advisor

President Biden Hires Donald Trump’s Niece, Mary Trump, To Be a CIA Advisor

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Many close friends of the Trump family have said off-the-record that Donald’s niece Mary Trump is the only member of the family who isn’t an arrogant, sarcastic, hateful, racist piece-of-crap. Mary Trump, who is…

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Funny story: Where’s Kamala? The Search Goes On For Elusive Termagant

Where’s Kamala? The Search Goes On For Elusive Termagant

BILLINGSGATE POST: Pressed for information by George Staphylococcus regarding the whereabouts of Kamala Harris, his peripatetic partner-in-crime, President Biden smiled and dropped his voice an octave. Crooning an old melody made famous by Paul Anka…

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Funny story: The Three Little Pigs and The Gay Wolf

The Three Little Pigs and The Gay Wolf

The best version: Once upon a time there was a mother pig who had three little pigs named Corn, Biscuit and Doughnut. Her husband was a drunkard who would listen to pop music all day. One day she said to them, "It's time for you to go out into…

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Funny story: Beyonce Has Just Bought The Tijuana Tamale Packers of Mexico’s Baja California Football League

Beyonce Has Just Bought The Tijuana Tamale Packers of Mexico’s Baja California Football League

BEVERLY HILLS – (Sports News) – It’s a well known fact that Houston native Beyonce (Knowles) has always been a big fan of football. As a little girl she used to cheer on the then Houston Oilers (now the Tennessee Titans) on her parents 19-inch bl…

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Funny story: Putin Reveals That He Has Always Seen Trump as Nothing But a Submissive Pussy

Putin Reveals That He Has Always Seen Trump as Nothing But a Submissive Pussy

MOSCOW – (Satire News) – Moscow’s Red Press has just confirmed that Russian President Vladimir Putin has always looked upon Donald Trump as nothing more than a pathetic, little submissive pussy, who has the biggest inferiority complex of anyone on ea…

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Funny story: Home Depot Announces Why They Will No Longer Be Selling Grass Fertilizer

Home Depot Announces Why They Will No Longer Be Selling Grass Fertilizer

CHICAGO – (Satire News) – A corporate executive with the huge home improvement retailer has just revealed that it will no longer sell grass fertilizer. Miles F. Furshetta, 63, who is the company’s director of Customer Relations and Possible Lawsui…

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Funny story: A Montreal College Cheerleader Injures Her Camel Toe During a Very Difficult Cheerleading Maneuver

A Montreal College Cheerleader Injures Her Camel Toe During a Very Difficult Cheerleading Maneuver

MONTREAL – (Sports Satire) – The local newspapers are reporting that the head cheerleader for the Montreal Jr. College Beavers hurt her pubic region when a very difficult cheerleading maneuver went horribly wrong. Joanie F. Mackinberger, 19, was t…

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Funny story: The Taliban Has Confiscated 3,000 Camels and They Have Put Them All on Craig’s List

The Taliban Has Confiscated 3,000 Camels and They Have Put Them All on Craig’s List

KABUL, Afghanistan – (Business Satire) – Reports out of the Taliban-Controlled Afghanistan republic say that Taliban General Abdali Tibia Nim-Nim has ordered that all Afghani camels be rounded up. His troops, which he has christened the Nim-Nimers…

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Funny story: Jimmy Carter And Joe Biden Battle For WOAT (Worst Of All Time) President

Jimmy Carter And Joe Biden Battle For WOAT (Worst Of All Time) President

BILLINGSGATE POST: Just when Jimmy Carter believed he was a mortal lock for the coveted WOAT (Worst Of All Time) American President, Joe Biden raised the stakes by enabling the Afghan airport evacuation debacle in Kabul this week. Jimmy Carter is…

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Funny story: Switzerland’s Moonshot Rocket Lifts Off The Launch Pad and Quickly Crashes Into The Alps

Switzerland’s Moonshot Rocket Lifts Off The Launch Pad and Quickly Crashes Into The Alps

WOODEN CLOG, Switzerland – (Sci-Tech Satire) – Swiss news agencies are reporting that Switzerland’s attempt to land a space ship on the moon has sizzled big time. National authorities with the Swiss Moon Federation (SMF) commented that they are em…

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Funny story: Senator Rand Paul is The Granddaddy of Misinformation and Unadulterated Bullshit!

Senator Rand Paul is The Granddaddy of Misinformation and Unadulterated Bullshit!

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Political pundits agree that more bullshit comes out of Rand “The Weasel” Paul’s mouth than anyone else in the entire country; except maybe for Trump, McConnell, Gaetz, Jordan, Graham, Hannity, Carlson, Gutfeld, and…

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Funny story: President Biden is Considering Invading Afghanistan and Totally Destroying The Taliban Terrorist Troops

President Biden is Considering Invading Afghanistan and Totally Destroying The Taliban Terrorist Troops

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki has stated that the United States is more than likely going to invade the Taliban-held nation of Afghanistan. She said that both President Biden and Vice-President Harris are…

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Funny story: The Taliban's 82nd Volunteer Division Invades Herzegovina

The Taliban's 82nd Volunteer Division Invades Herzegovina

BANJONOOKI, Herzegovina – Radio Herzegovina has confirmed that members of the Taliban’s 82nd Volunteer Division have invaded Herzegovina. A spokesperson for the country stated that the Herzegovinian army is fighting gallantly, but being outnumbere…

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Funny story: Unfit man complaining about Athletes again

Unfit man complaining about Athletes again

Chutney on the Fritz's most famous inhabitant Brian Asshat has been complaining about the efforts of Athletes, as he always does. The mildly obese thrower of shoes gets slightly breathless in his garden but still likes to believe that he could hav…

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Funny story: The lost art of Umbrella wrangling

The lost art of Umbrella wrangling

Recent news footage has shown that the British Prime Minister Boris Johnson, cannot be trusted to put up an Umbrella. It shows the lovable buffoon trying to erect an umbrella dangerously close to Prince Charles, before the wind, joining in the revelr…

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Funny story: A White House Source Says Trump Will Be Arrested Very Soon

A White House Source Says Trump Will Be Arrested Very Soon

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – A highly reliable source within the White House, who knows the New York attorney general, says that the word on the streets of Manhattan, is that the worst president in the history of presidents – Donald John Trump,…

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Funny story: One of Al-Qaeda’s Meanest and Most Notorious Leaders Captured By The US Navy Seals

One of Al-Qaeda’s Meanest and Most Notorious Leaders Captured By The US Navy Seals

SUKAHATU, Afghanistan – (Satire News) – The Chicago Daily Wind reports that one of the most notorious Al-Qaeda leaders Omar Shaker Fasheen is now is custody. A team of 6 Navy Seals captured Fasheen as he was having kinky sexual relations with his…

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Funny story: England Wanker Team wins Gold at Wanker Olympics!

England Wanker Team wins Gold at Wanker Olympics!

England continue to achieve great success as a bunch of 'Wankers' after successfully leaving the EU as renowned 'Tossers!' They now have won a gold medal at the alternative Olympics held in 'Willy Wanker Land' better known as Vatican City! Several…

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Funny story: Congressman Kevin McCarthy Threatens Gavel Hit On Nancy Pelosi

Congressman Kevin McCarthy Threatens Gavel Hit On Nancy Pelosi

California Congressman and minority leader of the House of Representatives Kevin McCarthy is still selling baloney from the good old days of working at his deli. While the keynote speaker at a Tennessee Statesman’s dinner, he predicted that when…

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Funny story: Books We'd All Love to Read

Books We'd All Love to Read

Donald Trump - One Tweet Over the Line (a winners book for pussies who still pretend I lost) Christopher Wray - How I Maintained My Integrity While Others Chose to Follow the Law Leonardo DeCaprio - The Man Who Single Handedly Ended MMGW By Fly…

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Funny story: Bertie Wooster and Jeeves bombard Jaggedone's demented Cerebral Cortex from the Unknown!

Bertie Wooster and Jeeves bombard Jaggedone's demented Cerebral Cortex from the Unknown!

Lying in bed, propellers in your head, dreaming naughty dreams instead, then suddenly voices appear from the dead! "Jaggedone, we are back as we said, posh, aristocratic bred, Jeeves, you dastardly rascal tell us the latest scandals circling under th…

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Funny story: Al-Qaeda and Hezbollah Are Planning on Invading Afghanistan and Driving the Taliban Out!

Al-Qaeda and Hezbollah Are Planning on Invading Afghanistan and Driving the Taliban Out!

KABUL, Afghanistan – (World News) – The Middle East news agency known as Sandstone News has just reported that two very popular terrorists groups have plans to invade Afghanistan and kick the Taliban out. Al-Qaeda leader Zabu Isbad Fufu, and Hezbo…

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Funny story: Last Seen, Prince Harry Juggling Balls

Last Seen, Prince Harry Juggling Balls

Yes, it has come to that: The very ridiculous. Prince Harry is seen through a window outdoors juggling his balls while his wife sits at a table, used as a desk, directing a not at all funny and bizarre video. If that video doesn’t point out the su…

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Funny story: Donald Trump Reveals That His 2024 Presidential Campaign Running Mate Will Be The Gorgeously Hot, Sexy-As-Hell Ivanka Trump

Donald Trump Reveals That His 2024 Presidential Campaign Running Mate Will Be The Gorgeously Hot, Sexy-As-Hell Ivanka Trump

PALM BEACH, Florida - ( Satire New) – Word coming out of the spider-infested Mar-a-Lago mansion is that Donald John Trump is thrilled to announce that his vice-presidential running mate will be none other than his hot, sexy, lusciously delicious daug…

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Funny story: President Biden Moves To Condemn Mar-a-Lago

President Biden Moves To Condemn Mar-a-Lago

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Word filtering out of the White House is that after receiving a private report from a private report reporting firm, President Biden will be signing a Presidential Executive Order condemning Trump’s Florida home – M…

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Funny story: Dodgers and Astros Fans Fight and Fight and Fight in The Stands

Dodgers and Astros Fans Fight and Fight and Fight in The Stands

LOS ANGELES – (Sports Satire) – Needless to say there is no love-lost between Los Angeles Dodgers fans and Houston Astros Fans. The sports animosity goes back to 2017, when the Astros beat the Dodgers to capture the World Series Championship. A…

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Funny story: A Meteorite Crashes Into An Alabama Cotton Field Destroying Over 700,000 Cotton Balls

A Meteorite Crashes Into An Alabama Cotton Field Destroying Over 700,000 Cotton Balls

DIXIELAND, Alabama – (Satire News) – Radio station KDIX 101, reported that a 2.7 ton meteorite has crashed into an Alabama cotton field causing extensive damage. The meteorite, believed to have originated in Uranus, landed smack-dab in the middle…

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Funny story: Vice-President Harris Promises That Trump Will Be a Jailbird By “Turkey Day”

Vice-President Harris Promises That Trump Will Be a Jailbird By “Turkey Day”

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Vice-President Harris told Ipso Facto News that she is 99.998% certain that the former “Divider-in-Chief” aka Donald Jonathan Trump will be wearing an orange inmates jumpsuit and sitting in a jail cell before Thanks…

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Funny story: President Biden Vows To Issue Heavy Fines To Bikers Who Attend The Annual Sturgis Bike Rally

President Biden Vows To Issue Heavy Fines To Bikers Who Attend The Annual Sturgis Bike Rally

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The 81st Annual Sturgis Motorcycle Rally is underway and President Biden is highly upset. White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki informed the news media that last year 461,307 bikers attended the rally and Fox New…

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Funny story: Boss Pleads Allergic Reaction

Boss Pleads Allergic Reaction

Pleading against a charge of wrongful dismissal, national distribution centre boss, Niall Nash claimed he suffered an unavoidable allergic reaction to the plaintiff, Mr ‘Stumpy’ Foot. “After the accident he wouldn’t even look at me,” complained Mr F…

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Funny story: A Man In Hot Springs, Arkansas, Holds Up a McDonald’s Drive-Thru Window

A Man In Hot Springs, Arkansas, Holds Up a McDonald’s Drive-Thru Window

HOT SPRINGS, Arkansas – (Satire News) – The Hot Springs Police Department reports that a tall, slender individual, who looked a lot like Matt Gaetz, but not anywhere near as fat, or as ridiculously overweight, drove up to a McDonalds drive-thru and h…

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Funny story: Scientists Are Puzzled As To Why Buffaloes Are Mating With Squirrels

Scientists Are Puzzled As To Why Buffaloes Are Mating With Squirrels

YELLOWSTONE NATIONAL PARK, Wyoming – (Satire News) – Park rangers at Yellowstone are puzzled, confused, and confounded as to why adult male bison are starting to mate with adult female squirrels. The rangers say that they have been getting lots of…

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Funny story: Woman still hasn't finished her Haiku

Woman still hasn't finished her Haiku

Dorothy Fotherington Smythe from the Estate in Mithering on the Trent has been working on a Haiku for eight months and is yet to finish it. The ancient Japanese writing form is beloved of pretentious 17-year-olds wanting to impress their teachers,…

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Funny story: An Egg Roll Food Truck in San Francisco’s Chinatown Makes $1 Million Per Day

An Egg Roll Food Truck in San Francisco’s Chinatown Makes $1 Million Per Day

SAN FRANCISCO – (Satire News) – San Francisco Mayor London Breed, has told Food Fad Magazine that the Rockin’ & Rollin’ Egg Roll Food Truck is doing fantastic sales. She pointed out that she spoke to Ling Dinga Ling, the owner, who told her th…

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Funny story: Dr. Fauci Says Donald Trump Needs To Have Surgery

Dr. Fauci Says Donald Trump Needs To Have Surgery

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The nation’s top doctor has made it abundantly clear that the former resident of the White House, Donald J. Trump needs to have surgery and as soon as humanly possible. Dr. Fauci informed the news media that Trum…

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Funny story: China is Reporting a Huge Decline in The Trumpapalooza Flu

China is Reporting a Huge Decline in The Trumpapalooza Flu

HONG KONG – (Satire News) – Several Chinese news agencies are reporting that the leader of the Peoples Republic of China, Xi Jinping, is happy to report a downward spiral in cases of the Trumpapalooza Flu Virus (as he has ordered it be called). H…

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Funny story: Donald Trump’s Kool-Aid Company Files For Bankruptcy

Donald Trump’s Kool-Aid Company Files For Bankruptcy

NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – The Ipso Facto News Agency has just confirmed that the former “Golfer-in-Chief’s” Kool-Aid company has indeed filed for bankruptcy. Oslo D. Troyjoy, a spokesperson for Bankruptcies of America, said that the Donald T…

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Funny story: The Texas State High Court Calls For Gov. Greg “The Crazy Prick” Abbott To Be Removed From Office

The Texas State High Court Calls For Gov. Greg “The Crazy Prick” Abbott To Be Removed From Office

AUSTIN – (Satire News) – Reports coming out of the heart of Texas state that Governor Greg Abbott, who has gone off-the-deep-end and needs to be removed from office before the ignorant, loose cannon shitass gets a wild hair up his ass and decides to…

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Funny story: NASCAR’S 1st Transgender Driver Wins Her First Race

NASCAR’S 1st Transgender Driver Wins Her First Race

TOLEDO, Ohio – (Sports Satire) – The NASCAR organization is proud to announce that the Toledo 300 Invitational was won by the organization’s very first transgender driver. Twenty-eight-year-old Catalina Puffinpick captured the coveted race from a…

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Funny story: Russia’s Most Advanced Stealth Bomber Flies Across The United Kingdom Totally Undetected

Russia’s Most Advanced Stealth Bomber Flies Across The United Kingdom Totally Undetected

LONDON – (Satire News) – England’s Tickety Boo News is reporting lots of red faces at 10 Downing Street, Buckingham Palace, and Wembley Stadium. TBN reporter Brompton Boxgrove, stated that the Royal Air Force has admitted that a Russian Stealth Bo…

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Funny story: Guess Who Has A Temperature And Is Very Sick?

Guess Who Has A Temperature And Is Very Sick?

Someone has a temperature, wearing a mask, getting a vaccination, and self-quarantine at home will not save anyone. Vitamin C won’t do any good. Gluten-free or vegan? Forget it. It’s spreading like wildfire in every continent because it is wildfi…

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Funny story: Covid-19 Variant Is Turning Into A War Of The Worlds Film

Covid-19 Variant Is Turning Into A War Of The Worlds Film

The Covid-19 variant, called Delta, is turning into a War Of The Worlds film. So where is Tom Cruise? He’s supposed to be scaling down a rope, stop four inches above the floor and rescue the world from that killer virus called Delta. And Delta is no…

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Funny story: Hope Hicks Wants To Have Trump’s Baby

Hope Hicks Wants To Have Trump’s Baby

BALTIMORE – (Satire News) – The rumors swirling around Baltimore are that former White House aide to the one-term president Donald John Trump, Hope Hicks, has confided to her hairdresser that she wants to have DJT’s baby in the worst way. One has…

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Funny story: 27 Generals and 19 Admirals Now Admit That Trump Made Them Donate $16,000 Each To The Donald Trump Miscellaneous Fund

27 Generals and 19 Admirals Now Admit That Trump Made Them Donate $16,000 Each To The Donald Trump Miscellaneous Fund

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The Washington Globe-Express has confirmed that the former president insisted that 46 of the nation’s top military officials make a contribution to one of his many personal funds. Lola Watergold with the Globe-Ex…

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Funny story: Antifa and The Proud Boys Get Into A Knockdown-Dragout Fight In Portland

Antifa and The Proud Boys Get Into A Knockdown-Dragout Fight In Portland

PORTLAND, Oregon – (Satire News) – News reports out of Portland are reporting that two tremendously extreme hate groups clashed at a Walmart parking lot in downtown Portland. Reporters said that at first the two groups were simply taunting each ot…

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Funny story: The Minneapolis Mice Band – The Mouseketeers Advances on America’s Got Talent

The Minneapolis Mice Band – The Mouseketeers Advances on America’s Got Talent

LOS ANGELES – (Satire News) – One of the most amazing acts to ever perform on the "America’s Got Talent Show," will be moving on to the next round of the entertainment show. Producers of "AGT" say that the amazing mice band known as The Mouseketee…

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Funny story: A Woman In Dallas Claims She Can Give Herself Multiple Orgasms Simply By Thinking About An Eggplant

A Woman In Dallas Claims She Can Give Herself Multiple Orgasms Simply By Thinking About An Eggplant

DALLAS – (Satire News) – Milly Dellapicker, 28, recently told her gynecologist that she has a unique ability to give herself multiple orgasms simply by thinking about an eggplant. Milly says she's still single, and has been giving herself dozens o…

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Funny story: The US Warns Canada To Control Their Wandering Moose or Else

The US Warns Canada To Control Their Wandering Moose or Else

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The US Department of Animal Husbandry has issued a stern warning to our neighbor to the north regarding their wandering moose. Stating that the Canadian moose cross over into the US and they then proceed to eat t…

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Funny story: President Biden Issues a Presidential Executive Order Taxing Billionaires at a 95% Rate

President Biden Issues a Presidential Executive Order Taxing Billionaires at a 95% Rate

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Press Secretary Jen Psaki announced to the White House press corps that the president has decided to cut some of the tremendous deficit that he inherited from the former “Divider-in-Chief,” Donald Jonathan Trump.

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Funny story: Marjorie Taylor Greene Says She Wants Afghanistan To Become The 51st State

Marjorie Taylor Greene Says She Wants Afghanistan To Become The 51st State

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Political pundits are all in complete agreement that Georgia congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene keeps on saying the most fucked-up shit with each brand new day. The dishwater blonde's latest hormonal rant is th…

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Funny story: The Reason Why Trump’s Urologist Revealed That Trumptard’s Testiciles Are Now The Size of Two Baby Peas

The Reason Why Trump’s Urologist Revealed That Trumptard’s Testiciles Are Now The Size of Two Baby Peas

PALM BEACH, Florida – (Satire News) – Everyone knows that doctor’s are not supposed to reveal any details on the status of their patients physical, mental, emotional, or sexual condition. Ever since the time of Joan of Arc and Attila The Hun, what…

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Funny story: Hunter Biden And Carlos Danger Appointed To Run Joint Cybersecurity Force

Hunter Biden And Carlos Danger Appointed To Run Joint Cybersecurity Force

BILLINGSGATE POST: Today it was announced that Hunter Biden and Carlos Danger, aka; Anthony Weiner, would head the newly formed Joint Cybersecurity Force. Both men have had vast experience in the field. Of course, everyone knows that Hunter Biden…

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Funny story: The Taliban Has Just Announced That Women In Afghanistan Have Just Lost The Right To Vote

The Taliban Has Just Announced That Women In Afghanistan Have Just Lost The Right To Vote

KABUL, Afghanistan – (World Satire) – Now that the Taliban terrorist have taken over the country, their first mandate is that women will no longer be allowed to vote. Taliban spokesperson Sabeen Siri Yasim, remarked that another change will be tha…

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Funny story: The Newest McDonalds in Dallas Has Opened Up a Drive-Thru Window Lane Just For People on Horseback

The Newest McDonalds in Dallas Has Opened Up a Drive-Thru Window Lane Just For People on Horseback

DALLAS – (Satire News) – According to recent statistics on horses in Texas, one out of every six adults in the Dallas Metroplex area owns a horse. And some families are known as two-horse families. In keeping with that theme, the executives at McD…

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Funny story: Dublin, Ireland, Has To Cancel their Annual Blarney Stone Festival Parade & Bacon and Cabbage Cooking Contest Due To The Bulgarian Bumble Bee Infestation

Dublin, Ireland, Has To Cancel their Annual Blarney Stone Festival Parade & Bacon and Cabbage Cooking Contest Due To The Bulgarian Bumble Bee Infestation

DUBLIN – (World Satire News) – The lord mayor of Dublin, Ireland, Paul McAuliffe, has informed the citizens of his city that he regrets to have to cancel this year’s much anticipated Annual Blarney Stone Festival Parade & Bacon and Cabbage Cookin…

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Funny story: Boris Johnson: "I'm the perfect James Bond"

Boris Johnson: "I'm the perfect James Bond"

Knowing his time as UK prime minister is drawing to a close, Boris Johnson has set his sights on another role: 007. The premier says he is an ideal James Bond, with all of his boozing and sleeping around. "Who's going to replace Daniel Craig? W…

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Funny story: Drought-Stricken, Fire-Laden California is Buying Water From Chicago

Drought-Stricken, Fire-Laden California is Buying Water From Chicago

SACRAMENTO, California – (Satire News) – The state of California, suffering from a horrendous drought has just informed the news media that they have worked out a deal to purchase water from Chicago. The Windy City gets its water from Lake Michiga…

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Funny story: Donald Trump Says That Lady Golfer Paige Spiranac Is So Darn Sexy, If She Wants To Kneel For The National Anthem – That’s Fine With Him

Donald Trump Says That Lady Golfer Paige Spiranac Is So Darn Sexy, If She Wants To Kneel For The National Anthem – That’s Fine With Him

PALM BEACH, Florida – (Satire News) – The former Divider-in-Chief recently told Laura Ingraham the Fox State TV, that he thinks that LPGA golfer Paige Spirinac is one of the sexiest females that he has ever seen; including Hope Hicks. The Trumptar…

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Funny story: Trump Aide Caused Kabul Airport Bottle-Neck

Trump Aide Caused Kabul Airport Bottle-Neck

The name sounded vaguely familiar: Miller? Definitely not the same guy who was once married to Marlyn Monroe. He was the playwright with the first name of Arthur. And there was also author Henry Miller. Oh yes, Stephen Miller was in the Trump admi…

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Funny story: A United States Battleship Accidentally Sinks a Cambodian Fishing Boat

A United States Battleship Accidentally Sinks a Cambodian Fishing Boat

THE GULF OF THAILAND – (Satire News) – The USS Jimmy Carter, is sad to report that they have sunk a Cambodian fishing boat that carelessly crossed in front of them. Captain Keith P. Gunnmelo stated that his chief radarman mistook the fishing boat…

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Funny story: A Harlem Pole Dancer Wins The Giant Cinnamon Roll Eating Contest

A Harlem Pole Dancer Wins The Giant Cinnamon Roll Eating Contest

HARLEM – (Satire News) – Ever since she was a little girl growing up in Harlem, Quanzilla Yolanda Windmuffin, 26, has been able to eat lots of large things with very little effort. She explains it by saying that she has a very tiny uvula which mak…

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Funny story: Footy World Cup to be moved from Qatar to Kabul in 2022!

Footy World Cup to be moved from Qatar to Kabul in 2022!

FIFA, world body controlling global footy, have struck a deal with the Taliban, and the Taliban will now host the World cup in 2022! They have offered their services to patrol and control proceedings in Kabul plus FIFA will pay them $10 billion smack…

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Funny story: UCLA Headed For 4th Straight 0-3 Start

UCLA Headed For 4th Straight 0-3 Start

The Bruin athletic director may have thought he had scheduled some patsies for his UCLA football team when he picked Hawaii and Fresno State as two of the three non-conference teams in the opening weeks of the schedule. Think again! The Bruins of Wes…

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Funny story: Canadian Prime Minister Calls For An Election For His Erection

Canadian Prime Minister Calls For An Election For His Erection

Canadian Prime Minister, Justin Trudeau (who also goes by the name 'Justine' on Saturday nights), has done what most logical, intelligent, and compassionate world leaders would do, and has called for a Federal election during a global pandemic. Af…

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Funny story: Governor Andrew Cuomo Says He’ll Resign When Trump Stops Lying (Which is Never!)

Governor Andrew Cuomo Says He’ll Resign When Trump Stops Lying (Which is Never!)

NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – After countless members of Congress have called for the governor of New York to resign, Governor Cuomo has said that he has no plans to effen resign. He pointed out that Trump allegedly boinked 82 adult females, all…

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Funny story: The NFL's First Transgender Cheerleader Comes Out

The NFL's First Transgender Cheerleader Comes Out

TAMPA BAY, Florida – (Sports Satire) – Sporting Chance Magazine has confirmed that a Tampa Bay Buccaneers cheerleader is the NFLs first transgender rah-rah girl. Twenty-four-year-old Gayle Wanderlust, of Tallahassee, who has been cheering for the…

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Funny story: NASA Is Shocked To Learn That The Warranty on The Mars Land Rover Perseverance Has Expired

NASA Is Shocked To Learn That The Warranty on The Mars Land Rover Perseverance Has Expired

HOUSTON – (Satire News) – There are dozens and dozens of red-faced space program executives at the NASA Space Center that have overlooked something that could end up costing the American taxpayers lots and lots of money. Boom Boom News reporter H…

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Funny story: Jack-in-the-Box Informs The Female Federation of America That They Are Not Going To Change Their Corporate Name

Jack-in-the-Box Informs The Female Federation of America That They Are Not Going To Change Their Corporate Name

JOLIET, Illinois – (Satire News) – A spokesperson for the Jack-in-the-Box fast food franchise says that they don’t give a damn what the Female Federation of America says, they are not changing their name. BuzzFuzz reports that Aubra "Giggles" Capp…

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Funny story: Australia Threatens To Shoot Anyone Who Violates Their Pandemic Lockdown

Australia Threatens To Shoot Anyone Who Violates Their Pandemic Lockdown

CANBERRA, Australia – (Satire News) – The Australian government has issued a very strict directive that anyone who violates their lockdown risks the possibility of getting shot, and not just in the leg either. A spokesperson for the government sai…

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Funny story: Calls For Cuomo To Resign Or Else He's Going To Be Impeached

Calls For Cuomo To Resign Or Else He's Going To Be Impeached

There are calls for New York Governor Andrew Cuomo to resign or be impeached. Not exactly a choice between Ice cream or pie, but that's the dessert that's being offered up to the Governor. He could say no to both choices and sit it out like Trump…

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Funny story: The University of Alabama Has Decided To Change The Name of Their Athletic Teams

The University of Alabama Has Decided To Change The Name of Their Athletic Teams

TUSCALOOSA, Alabama – (Sports Satire) – The Board of Regents of the University of Alabama, after 189 years has decided to change the team’s name. The Sports Bet Gazette notes that effective Thursday, September 30, 2021, the name Crimson Tide will…

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Funny story: Chic-fil-A Says That Due To The Employee Shortage They May Be Forced To Hire Inmates Who Are On Parole

Chic-fil-A Says That Due To The Employee Shortage They May Be Forced To Hire Inmates Who Are On Parole

CHICAGO – (Satire News) – BuzzFuzz reports that one of the biggest fast food corporations is having trouble hiring (and keeping) employees. Agatha Agave, a spokeswoman for the fast food giant, told Sonora Cahoots, with BuzzFuzz that young people j…

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Funny story: A Florida Octogenarian Couple Discover a Volcano

A Florida Octogenarian Couple Discover a Volcano

PENSACOLA, Florida – (Satire News) – BuzzFuzz is reporting that a huge volcano has just been discovered east of Pensacola. The volcano has been given the name Mt. St. Citrus. Reports coming out of the Plywood State point out that the Florida Hous…

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Funny story: A Fledging Cruise Line Turns Things Around When The Ship Becomes An All-Nude Cruise Ship

A Fledging Cruise Line Turns Things Around When The Ship Becomes An All-Nude Cruise Ship

PENSACOLA, Florida – (Satire News) – The Ship Ahoy Cruise Line Company, out of Pensacola, has found the way to drum up much-needed business in this era of the so called Trumpian Pandemic. The company, which is owned by Pepsi Cola and Peter Pan Pea…

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Funny story: Internet Biscuit Scam Shock

Internet Biscuit Scam Shock

Outraged Welsh biscuit lover Dai Jestif claims big business is stealing millions through internet biscuit scams. “It was only when the computer started malfunctioning that it occurred to me. You see, every time you go to a site it asks you to acc…

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Funny story: Governor Andrew Cuomo Explains Why He Resigned

Governor Andrew Cuomo Explains Why He Resigned

NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Every news agency in America and over 147 world wide reported that New York Governor Andrew Cuomo resigned. He said that it was not because of any sexually-suggestive charges, or claims of sexual harassment, or anyt…

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Funny story: Manchester United Fined For Using Illegal Steroid Air in Their Soccer Balls

Manchester United Fined For Using Illegal Steroid Air in Their Soccer Balls

MANCHESTER, England – (Sports Satire) – England’s Tickety Boo News has uncovered a scandal that involves one of the best sports teams in the world of soccer, or football as they call it in the United Kingdom. TBN reporter Neville Twickenbuck, said…

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Funny story: Afghanistan’s New Taliban Government is Planning on Renaming Kabul Airport

Afghanistan’s New Taliban Government is Planning on Renaming Kabul Airport

KABUL, Afghanistan – (World Satire) – Taliban leader General Abdali Tibia Nim-Nim has just announced that he has decided to rename Kabul Airport. The general informed new reporters, including America’s the Vox Populi News Agency, that he, and he a…

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Funny story: Some Good News for Governor Cuomo

Some Good News for Governor Cuomo

It has been a rough week for the Honorable Andrew Cuomo, New York’s beleaguered governor. Everyone from President Biden to the entire New York congressional delegation is calling on the governor to resign following a report issued by New York’s…

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Funny story: CDC: "Covid Vax May Cure Baldness And Add Inches 'Elsewhere'"

CDC: "Covid Vax May Cure Baldness And Add Inches 'Elsewhere'"

The Center For Disease Control is said to be preparing a national campaign that suggests taking any available Covid-19 vaccine could help cure male pattern baldness and add length to the male organ. The hope is that just the possibility that could ha…

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Funny story: Meat-Loaves (non-pork version) re-release latest version of 'Bats Out of Hell' called 'Rats out of Kabul Hell!'

Meat-Loaves (non-pork version) re-release latest version of 'Bats Out of Hell' called 'Rats out of Kabul Hell!'

After witnessing the Taliban's 'fast-track' conquering 20 years of a total waste of billions of bucks in Afghanistan, Meatloaves, seventies, overweight pop-icons, decided to offer the world some 'poppy' relief by re-releasing their cult album, 'Bats…

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Funny story: Terrorist gets surprised by the meaning of "Terrorism" in a dictionary

Terrorist gets surprised by the meaning of "Terrorism" in a dictionary

Recently there has been a heated debate about what exactly is terrorism. After a lot of discussion with countless arguments in live TV and social media, America has finally come to terms and finally look it up at the dictionary. The results are s…

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Funny story: Biden To Order Flags To Fly At Half-Staff For Foreseeable Future

Biden To Order Flags To Fly At Half-Staff For Foreseeable Future

President Joe Biden reportedly plans on issuing an Executive Order to fly all American flags on federal property at half-staff every day. The reason, said a White House source speaking off the record, is “because he feels if it’s not one thing it’s…

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