There have been 232 spoof news stories published in February 2021. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Funny story: Man Defers Wank For Another Time

Man Defers Wank For Another Time

A Fort Lauderdale man postponed a highly anticipated wank after realizing that he ran the risk of getting caught in the act by either his wife, his daughter or the guy who 'does the garden'. The man, whose identity cannot be revealed, had planned…

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Funny story: #DeleteFacebook! Facebook Group Deleted

#DeleteFacebook! Facebook Group Deleted

A Facebook Group created calling for a boycott of Facebook after it took the extraordinary step of banning users in Australia from accessing news in a row over paying for content, has been deleted, by Facebook. 'Delete Facebook', 'Boycott Zuckerbe…

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Funny story: Elon Musk’s New Planetary Telescope is The Most Powerful in The World

Elon Musk’s New Planetary Telescope is The Most Powerful in The World

HOUSTON, Texas – (Satire News) – The richest man in the world, Elon Musk has just developed the amazing Musk Busybody Planetary Telescope, which he has nicknamed "Ringo". The entrepreneur, who is the father of the Tesla, the SpaceX Starship, and…

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Funny story: Trees Not Quite So Green This Year

Trees Not Quite So Green This Year

It may be global warming, climate change, or environmental change, it could be any two of these, or even all three of them, but something is happening out in the sticks, claims one man who says that, in his neck of the woods, at least, the trees aren…

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Funny story: English lobsters demand new Brexit referendum!

English lobsters demand new Brexit referendum!

(NOT EDITED) English lobsters caught in EU waters are now being returned to the UK and, instead of being directly boiled alive in French or German cooking pots, are now rotting in chilled trailers stuck in traffic jams waiting for customs clearance!…

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Funny story: Mars landing is a massive marketing hoax claim inhabitants of other planets in our solar system!

Mars landing is a massive marketing hoax claim inhabitants of other planets in our solar system!

(NOT EDITED) Aliens inhabiting planets in our solar system are up-in-arms (We don't quite know how many arms aliens have) because they believe the Mars landing was a fake, massive publicity stunt, sponsored by a transvestite Bounty-Hunter smelling of…

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Funny story: 101 Symptoms That May Mean You've Already Had The Coronavirus

101 Symptoms That May Mean You've Already Had The Coronavirus

The Coronavirus, COVID-19, is still far from being conquered, despite a worldwide roll-out of vaccination programs, but, with many people reporting relatively mild symptoms, it's difficult to know, conclusively, whether we are suffering from COVID-19…

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Funny story: Snoring in hospital beds is to be forbidden!

Snoring in hospital beds is to be forbidden!

(NOT EDITED) Anti-snoring groups are protesting outside German hospitals in an attempt to make it a crime to snore during time spent in wards. "Snoring is a crime and should be forbidden!" Sensitive ex-patients have been observed screaming, "Snor…

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Funny story: GameStop Shares Went From $3, Up To $991, and Are Now Down to 14 Cents

GameStop Shares Went From $3, Up To $991, and Are Now Down to 14 Cents

NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – GameStop has proved the old adage that what goes up must come down. And Wall Street is thrilled that some kind of numerical civility will soon begin to filter back to the stock market jungle. According to RumorLand…

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Funny story: CPSC Issues Advisory that Materials Used in MyPillow May Cause Delusions of Political Conspiracies

CPSC Issues Advisory that Materials Used in MyPillow May Cause Delusions of Political Conspiracies

Washington DC - The Consumer Product Safety Commission issued a statement on Friday, that it is looking into data that seems to indicate that prolonged exposure to MyPillow might cause those connected with its manufacture to have hallucinations and d…

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Funny story: Manchester United Captain Harry Maguire Says He Wishes He Had A Tenner For Every Spoof Written About Him

Manchester United Captain Harry Maguire Says He Wishes He Had A Tenner For Every Spoof Written About Him

The Manchester United and England defender, Harry Maguire, has spoken out about the considerable, and growing, number of fake news stories written about him, and remarked that he wished he had a ten-pound note for every one of them, for then, he woul…

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Funny story: The World’s First Transgender Sumo Wrestler Gets Her Ass Kicked

The World’s First Transgender Sumo Wrestler Gets Her Ass Kicked

KAGOSHIMA, Japan – (Sports Satire) – The Saki-Saki News Agency has stated that the world’s first transgender wrestler, Yamaha Wasabi, 37, has lost for the first time in her 12-month career. Wasabi, who weighs a whopping 521 pounds, was clobbered b…

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Funny story: Man Was Almost Late For Work

Man Was Almost Late For Work

A tired man who decided to take a few extra minutes in bed this morning after his alarm clock went off, came close to being left red-faced when his 'few minutes' turned into 'more than an hour', and he was very nearly late for work. Moys Kenwood,…

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Funny story: Face Mask Blown Off Face By Strong Gust Of Wind

Face Mask Blown Off Face By Strong Gust Of Wind

There was surprise and not a little anger in one locality this morning, as the progress of a man strolling through the streets minding his own business was suddenly arrested when a strong gust of wind blew his face mask from his face, and onto the pa…

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Funny story: Conservative Political Party that Fights "Cancel Culture" Also Censures Members Who Disappoint it's Leader

Conservative Political Party that Fights "Cancel Culture" Also Censures Members Who Disappoint it's Leader

Washington D.C. - A conservative political party that prides itself on fighting the liberal "Cancel Culture", a movement which seeks to disenfranchise those who disagree with them, and eliminate any exchange of ideas deemed politically incorrect, has…

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Funny story: The NFL Super Bowl Committee Divulges That Disease Experts Say The C-19 Virus Was Found in Hundreds of Hot Dogs

The NFL Super Bowl Committee Divulges That Disease Experts Say The C-19 Virus Was Found in Hundreds of Hot Dogs

TAMPA BAY – (Sports Satire) – Several members of the news media report that, according to disease experts, traces of the C-19 virus were found in hundreds of the hot dogs served at the Super Bowl game. Dr. Tarpetina Kappalino, with the Florida Fed…

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Funny story: Germany passes legislation making farting in public legal!

Germany passes legislation making farting in public legal!

(NOT EDITED) Amid protests from conspiracy theorists, 'Querdenkers' (not Queer), lockdown opponents, and other mad-hatters in German society, Angie Merkel's government have decided to offer an olive-branch to such radical groups. Hopefully, by mak…

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Funny story: China Wants To Buy NASA

China Wants To Buy NASA

HONG KONG – (World News) – China’s Abacus News Agency has made it known that the leader of China, Xi Jinping, wants to purchase the National Aeronautics and Space Administration. The Chinese leader stated that he has been wanting to buy the covete…

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Funny story: Trump Barred from Living in Mar-A-Lago, Will Build Compound in Guyana for Family and Worshippers

Trump Barred from Living in Mar-A-Lago, Will Build Compound in Guyana for Family and Worshippers

Mar-A-Lago, Florida - Former President Donald Trump, rebuffed by his neighbors in West Palm Beach who refused to allow him and his camp followers to settle at his Mar-A-Lago resort here, has announced he will purchase a plot of land in Guyana to buil…

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Funny story: Student Denied Third Visit To Toilet In Same Lesson Spurts Diarrhoea Over Wide Area

Student Denied Third Visit To Toilet In Same Lesson Spurts Diarrhoea Over Wide Area

There was controversy at a local primary school earlier today, when a male student who had already paid two visits to the toilet during his science lesson, was denied a third visit by his frustrated teacher, and was made to pay dearly for the consequ…

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Funny story: Ex-Laker J.R. Smith found in Orlando Bubble hideout, thought there was still one more round of playoffs

Ex-Laker J.R. Smith found in Orlando Bubble hideout, thought there was still one more round of playoffs

Former Los Angeles Lakers role player J.R. Smith was found Saturday in a storage facility at the Disney Bubble complex near Orlando, more than 3 months after the conclusion of 2019-2020 season, expecting there to be still one more round of playoffs.

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Funny story: Marjorie Taylor Greene Set To Make Super Bowl Coin-Toss

Marjorie Taylor Greene Set To Make Super Bowl Coin-Toss

Football fans across the country are waiting on tenterhooks tonight, after NFL commissioner Roger Goodell hinted in an interview with sports journalists that Sunday's Super Bowl pre-match coin-toss may be made by the Republican representative for Geo…

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Funny story: Man Made Mistake Of Spitting Whilst On Motorbike

Man Made Mistake Of Spitting Whilst On Motorbike

A man out for a ride as a passenger on his wife's motorcycle at the weekend, has revealed how he made the catastrophic and very embarrassing mistake of attempting to spit whilst the vehicle was in motion. The incident happened last Sunday, as Moys…

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Funny story: New Orleans is Moving This Year's Mardi Gras Celebration To Denver, Colorado

New Orleans is Moving This Year's Mardi Gras Celebration To Denver, Colorado

NEW ORLEANS – (Satire News) – The New Orleans City Council, with the approval of the Chamber of Commerce, has decided to move this year’s Mardi Gras celebration to Denver, Colorado. City manager Paxton W. Studsteen stated that the reason is due to…

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Funny story: P.G.Wodehouse calls Jaggedone from his grave to transmit following dialogue between Bertie Wooster and Jeeves his butler!

P.G.Wodehouse calls Jaggedone from his grave to transmit following dialogue between Bertie Wooster and Jeeves his butler!

(NOT EDITED) After connecting via a medium, immortal author, P.G.Wodehouse, has again pecked on Jaggedone's wooden brain to offer his spiffing fans posh messages from the 'Other Side!' Bertie Wooster and his butler, Jeeves, reside in a honeycomb o…

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Funny story: Science Teacher Tells Student: "It's Not Rocket Science!"

Science Teacher Tells Student: "It's Not Rocket Science!"

A school student who kept bothering his science teacher with irrelevant, not to say 'irreverent', questions about space travel in a lesson that was, instead, on the topic of 'Matter' - which was somewhat difficult to understand - was told by the teac…

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Funny story: 'Parisienne Walkways' Heard At Local Wedding

'Parisienne Walkways' Heard At Local Wedding

In an incident that will surprise many readers, a man who was eating his breakfast has reported how he became aware of a song blaring out of loudspeakers at a local wedding that, although it was considered a classic in its day, drips with such sadnes…

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Funny story: Who Murdered Democracy?

Who Murdered Democracy?

Oh well, the Republicans say, that was yesterday; today is now. Get over it! It’s water under the bridge. Those who died can’t be resurrected. Those injured will recover. It’s a 'so what?' situation. Get over it! Tomorrow is another day. January 6 wi…

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Funny story: Trump's Lawyers: Telling Armed Crazies to "Go to Capitol" and "Fight Like Hell" Was Just Metaphorical

Trump's Lawyers: Telling Armed Crazies to "Go to Capitol" and "Fight Like Hell" Was Just Metaphorical

Washington D.C. - Lawyers for Donald Trump took center stage on Friday at his impeachment trial, and immediately claimed that the President's speech on January 6th, to a crowd of supporters whipped into a frenzy by Trump's claim that the election was…

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Funny story: The Vampire Dairies Starring Nina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder Is Back

The Vampire Dairies Starring Nina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder Is Back

HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – Millions of Vampire Diaries fans from Bulgaria to Pisagovia are thrilled that the popular vampire TV series is coming back with brand new shows. The year is now 2021, and the town has become a virtual cesspool of haunti…

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Funny story: Following Airline Tragedy, Red Bull Will No Longer Give You Wings

Following Airline Tragedy, Red Bull Will No Longer Give You Wings

The National Transportation Safety Board reached the conclusion of their investigation of flight 267 today, reporting that the aircraft’s left engine had suffered a catastrophic failure after a 6’2, 34-year-old man with wings crossed the plane’s flig…

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Funny story: History For Children #2: Adolf Hitler

History For Children #2: Adolf Hitler

Once upon a time, there was a little boy called Adolf, who lived in a cold, snowy country called Austria. From a humble beginning, Adolf grew up to be a famous man, who everybody knew about. This is his story. Adolf lived in a town called Linz. He…

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Funny story: The New York Yankees Sign a 17-Year-Old Pitcher Who Can Throw 107 MPH

The New York Yankees Sign a 17-Year-Old Pitcher Who Can Throw 107 MPH

NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – The manager of the New York Yankees, Aaron Boone, says he hasn’t been as happy as he is now since 2001, when he won $91,000 on Lucky Lady La Brea at the Santa Anita racetrack. The thing that has Boone so extremely…

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Funny story: Working Class Knobhead Accused Of Being 'Upper Class Twit'

Working Class Knobhead Accused Of Being 'Upper Class Twit'

In a misjudgement of humongous proportions, a man who, if he categorizes himself as being anything at all, classes himself as being a working class idiot, has been accused by another man of being an 'upper class twit'. The accusation arose earlier…

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Funny story: Morphine tablets cause erection instability!

Morphine tablets cause erection instability!

(NOT EDITED) Slipped discs, plus other agonising ailments, are often treated by doctors prescribing painkillers. However, their side effects, albeit painless, can cause other strange reactions to the male body scientists have discovered! Females s…

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Funny story: Man Has Got His Wife A Dildo For Valentine's Day

Man Has Got His Wife A Dildo For Valentine's Day

A man who was looking for an unusual and novel St. Valentine's Day gift for his wife, has gone for the jackpot this year, after revealing to workmates that he has got her a 12-inch black dildo. Ron Lummox, 40, hit upon the brilliant idea as he bro…

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Funny story: Savvy mum reveals how she feeds her malnourished family-of-seven gourmet-style meals for just £25 per week

Savvy mum reveals how she feeds her malnourished family-of-seven gourmet-style meals for just £25 per week

A savvy mum has revealed how she manages to serve her severely malnourished family-of-seven gourmet-style meals for just £25 per week. Roberta Simons, 39, from Birmingham, manages to feed her starving family on a budget using simple store cupboard…

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Funny story: A Homeless Man Who Bought $40 Worth of GameStop Stock in Late January, Learns It’s Now Worth $69 Million

A Homeless Man Who Bought $40 Worth of GameStop Stock in Late January, Learns It’s Now Worth $69 Million

CHEYENNE, Wyoming – (Satire News) – Horatio P. Zipp, 56, told Boom Boom News that he had been homeless for 6 years, ever since a horde of invading barbarian termites ate his 800 square foot wooden shack. He said that he had been standing on the co…

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Funny story: Biden Orders Revolving Fire Hydrants For White House Grounds

Biden Orders Revolving Fire Hydrants For White House Grounds

BILLINGSGATE POST: In his latest Executive Order, President Biden decreed that revolving fire hydrants be installed on the White House grounds, having grown tired of seeing his two mutts, Champ and Major, lift their legs to pee on the existing hydra…

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Funny story: Needle In Haystack Found

Needle In Haystack Found

A missing needle that was the focus of an intensive search being conducted in the East Yorkshire area this morning, has turned up, as its finder expected it would, in a haystack. The search for the needle was undertaken yesterday afternoon by Myke…

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Funny story: Teacher Resorted To Game Of Bingo To 'Kill Time'

Teacher Resorted To Game Of Bingo To 'Kill Time'

A teacher at a school where students had completed their work, and were merely sitting and waiting for the term to end, has told how he blew the roof off the building when he told his charges there was going to be a game of Bingo. The 9-year-old s…

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Funny story: LeBron James' Lakers and Kawhi Leonard's Clippers Have L.A. Fans Jumping For Joy

LeBron James' Lakers and Kawhi Leonard's Clippers Have L.A. Fans Jumping For Joy

LOS ANGELES – (Sports News) – The two teams that are occupying the top of the NBA’s Western Conference are both from LaLaLand, home of earthquakes, forest fires, mudslides, state-of-the-art drugs, and the Kardashian bitches. The celebrity media ag…

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Funny story: Original Jesus's sandals found in German priest's foot-locker!

Original Jesus's sandals found in German priest's foot-locker!

(NOT EDITED) A wicked smell was detected coming out of an ancient priest's foot-locker deep down in Pruem Cathedral's catacomb. Pruem is a town lodged between green hills faraway in the Eifel area of Germany. Locals have always wondered why such a…

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Funny story: The NFL Will Allow Quarterbacks to Use Mini-Computers While They’re on The Playing Field Starting Next Season

The NFL Will Allow Quarterbacks to Use Mini-Computers While They’re on The Playing Field Starting Next Season

NEW YORK – (Sports Satire) – NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell is taking Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones excellent suggestion. Jones suggested to the commissioner that, in order to embrace the ever-improving electronic advances in today’s fast-paced…

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Funny story: Man Got Doll's Leg Back On

Man Got Doll's Leg Back On

A child's doll whose leg came off several weeks ago has at last been repaired by the father of its owner, it has been reported. The doll, Malina, which can be seen in the graphic above, is the property of young Delma Kenwood, aged 5, who, in tempe…

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Funny story: Republicans Censure Liz Cheney But Okay With Trump Inciting Riot

Republicans Censure Liz Cheney But Okay With Trump Inciting Riot

Planet Earth skidded to a stop, and started scratching its head. “What?” Planet Earth asked. “The Republicans have censured Liz Cheney for exercising her freedom of speech, but are okay with Donald Trump inciting the January 6th riot of the Capit…

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Funny story: Senator Joseph McCarthy visits from Lower Belmarsh Hades Lot 46 Cell #19

Senator Joseph McCarthy visits from Lower Belmarsh Hades Lot 46 Cell #19

Incredible developments continue to shape our world. Vaccines that used to take several years to develop are now available in a few months. A new "political science" for the covid epidemic has emerged. Even more astonishing--breaking: Co…

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Funny story: The Kardashian Sisters To Star in the X-Rated Film, ‘3 Girls, 1 Margarita Glass’

The Kardashian Sisters To Star in the X-Rated Film, ‘3 Girls, 1 Margarita Glass’

HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – Andy Cohen, of the Bravo Network, is reporting that the three elder Kardashian sisters, have just been signed to star with Matthew McConaughey, Bradley Cooper, and Yo Yo Afro Woke, in the Tri-Moon Films production of the…

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Funny story: Writer Was Victim Of One-Star Ratings Attack

Writer Was Victim Of One-Star Ratings Attack

A writer on a satirical news website, who has clearly incurred the wrath of someone else on the site, has revealed how he has become the unwitting recipient of bonus points for six of his stories, after the dissatisfied reader decided to award 1-star…

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Funny story: All 3 Members of Pussy Riot Are Now Claiming Trump Grabbed Them By The Pussy

All 3 Members of Pussy Riot Are Now Claiming Trump Grabbed Them By The Pussy

BOSTON – (Satire News) – The Bravo Network’s Andy Cohen, who knows everything about everyone, said that he recently interviewed the three members of the Russian heavy metal rock band, Pussy Riot. Andy talked to the band while eating dinner at Bost…

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Funny story: 45 year-old Spoofer slips his disc on the turntable!

45 year-old Spoofer slips his disc on the turntable!

(NOT EDITED) Fab disco hit from rather weird 80's disco band, Dead or Alive (He really is dead), "You Spin Me Round" was brought back to life by Glam-Rock-Spoofer, John Joe-Transformer (Real name Bert Bumpkins), as he/she twirled around the bedroom d…

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Funny story: Patrick Mahomes Pays Tom Brady $2 Million

Patrick Mahomes Pays Tom Brady $2 Million

TAMPA BAY – (Satire News) – After getting his butt kicked all over Raymond James Stadium by Tom Brady’s Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Patrick Mahomes of the Kansas City Chiefs, showed that he’s an honorable man. Zorro La Bamba, with Sports Bet Gazette, st…

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Funny story: Who Says It Was An Acquittal?

Who Says It Was An Acquittal?

Who says it was an acquittal? The verdict was 57 to 43. There’s a 14 point difference. In a football game, that would have been a loss. Even Donald Trump can see it wasn’t a unanimous win or a real victory. In the world of Albert Einstein, Galile…

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Funny story: Maybe Biden's penis looks like a baby corn, says GOP strategist planning fake news leak

Maybe Biden's penis looks like a baby corn, says GOP strategist planning fake news leak

A senior GOP strategist reportedly tabled the idea they could damage US President Joe Biden's reputation by leaking a fake news story about how unflattering the President's penis was, especially when compared to former president Donald Trump's, accor…

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Funny story: Justice For The Capitol Building

Justice For The Capitol Building

The Capitol Building was vandalized by a mob of insurrectionists guided and motivated by Donald J. Trump. He claimed his reelection was stolen. Boo Hoo! Every loser’s lament. Trump failed to win the popular vote, and didn't come near winning t…

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Funny story: Five Wonka Bars Contain Golden Vaccination Ticket

Five Wonka Bars Contain Golden Vaccination Ticket

WONKAVILLE – The Wonka Corporation (a Unilever subsidiary) has announced that, in five of its Wonka Bars, there will be a Golden Ticket that allows the winner to receive a free Covid-19 vaccination. “There was a promotion like this a few years bac…

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Funny story: Liverpool Goalkeeper In Alleged Betting Scandal

Liverpool Goalkeeper In Alleged Betting Scandal

As the winners of last year's Premier League title, Liverpool were strongly backed to repeat that feat this year, and, after beating Crystal Palace 7-0 on 19 December, not many people would have bet against them. But one man did. Alisson is his…

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Funny story: Trump Admits He’s Guilty

Trump Admits He’s Guilty

After watching the films of the January 6, Capitol invasion by "that group of hoodlums" (Trump’s words), and hearing his January 6 speech in front of the White House, Donald J. Trump confessed in tears that he was guilty, yes guilty of inciting the m…

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Funny story: Special Forces From Switzerland Capture The World’s Most Notorious Terrorist Leader

Special Forces From Switzerland Capture The World’s Most Notorious Terrorist Leader

CAMEL SHIT, Afghanistan – (Satire News) – Al-Zit Mohammed, supreme leader of the Taliban, and the most notorious terrorist leader on earth, has been captured. Afghanistan’s Mirage News Agency has confirmed that the 52-year-old beer-bellied leader…

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Funny story: McDonald’s Loses Special Sauce Recipe; Big Mac Sales Halted

McDonald’s Loses Special Sauce Recipe; Big Mac Sales Halted

OAK BROOK, IL – In a stunning blow to an iconic American food product, McDonald’s Corporate Headquarters has announced that they have lost the recipe for the World-Renowned Special Sauce, the result being that sales of the Big Mac have been halted ac…

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Funny story: What Will Rogers Might Say About Today's Events

What Will Rogers Might Say About Today's Events

Here are some idiosyncratic observations about life in America today, written in the style of Will Rogers, as thoughts from far outside the box. The Pope says all dogs go to heaven. Does that include Rottweilers? A rising tide lifts all boats…

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Funny story: Great Having A President Who Can Cross His Knees

Great Having A President Who Can Cross His Knees

Instead of having an executive sitting on a sofa with a wide-open man-spread barn door, it's neat to see President Joe Biden easily cross his legs at the knee. And the hair? What kind of personality defect produces that repeated aberration? Remember…

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Funny story: Spoof Boss Admits That Technical Glitch Now Means That 1-Star Ratings Now Benefit Writers By 100 Points

Spoof Boss Admits That Technical Glitch Now Means That 1-Star Ratings Now Benefit Writers By 100 Points

The owner of a satirical news website has admitted that a technical error made during some routine maintenance work has resulted in a bonus for writers whose work attracts a normally derogatory 1-star rating - they now GAIN 100 points, instead of 1 p…

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Funny story: Public Hoping That Cult Leader Will be Convicted by a Jury, Half of Which Consists of His Followers

Public Hoping That Cult Leader Will be Convicted by a Jury, Half of Which Consists of His Followers

Washington D.C. - In a week-long trial of a former President and leader of the Trumpist cult, the American public, who recently, according to polls, decided he was guilty of fomenting violence against the country's democratic system of government, pl…

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Funny story: Man's Wife Has Left Him And Run Off With Her Dildo

Man's Wife Has Left Him And Run Off With Her Dildo

A man who hit upon the unusual idea of buying his wife a dildo as a gift for St. Valentine's Day, has told 'friends' on social media that she has now run off and left him, in order to start a new life in Europe with her 'pleasure stick'. She is th…

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Funny story: Meghan Markle Has Agreed To Appear on Dancing With The Stars

Meghan Markle Has Agreed To Appear on Dancing With The Stars

HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – BuzzFuzz has just disclosed that Meghan Markle, the Duchess of Sussex, has finally agreed to appear on TV’s original dance competition show, Dancing With The Stars. BuzzFuzz has stated that the DWTS producers have been…

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Funny story: Marjorie Taylor Greene Wants To Ban Black History Month

Marjorie Taylor Greene Wants To Ban Black History Month

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The woman who most of America is now calling the most hateful, despicable, evil woman in the entire universe, has just gone and stuck her size 13-D foot in her nasty, bigoted mouth. Marjorie “The Human Scarecrow”…

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Funny story: The Valentine's Day tradition that gets the cream

The Valentine's Day tradition that gets the cream

Many Valentine's Day traditions are modern, commercial and trashy - the giving of cards, the pressure to send flowers - these are all recent inventions. Yet there is one popular tradition that is still going and started all the way back with St Valen…

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Funny story: Liz Cheney Got It Right

Liz Cheney Got It Right

Bravo, Liz Cheney! While all the Republican Senators (except for Mitt Romney) got it dead wrong, House Representative Liz Cheney, Dick’s daughter, got it 100%, tap dancing, right! Speaking as a patriot and knowledgeable of the Constitution, Ms. C…

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Funny story: Kim Jong-un Says He and Donald Trump Have Broken Up

Kim Jong-un Says He and Donald Trump Have Broken Up

Pyongyang, North Korea – Rice Paddy News has confirmed that public citizen Donald Trump and the second most powerful leader in the world, Kim Jong-un, are no longer a couple. The North Korean leader said that he gave Trump his engagement ring back…

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Funny story: Tampa Bay Police Make 900 Arrests at The Super Bowl

Tampa Bay Police Make 900 Arrests at The Super Bowl

TAMPA BAY – (Sports Satire) – Boom Boom News reported that Tampa Bay police officers arrested 900 Super Bowl fans, who ended up missing the big game between the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and the Kansas City Chiefs, due to plain and simple unadulterated st…

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Funny story: Elon Musk is Building The World’s Most Amazing Floating Asteroid Belt Station

Elon Musk is Building The World’s Most Amazing Floating Asteroid Belt Station

HOUSTON – (Satire News) – Reports coming out of Houston state that the richest man in the world, Elon Musk, is in the process of building what will be a truly astonishing Floating Asteroid Belt Station. The station named Vesuvius, after his pet sa…

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Funny story: GOP Offers to “Uncensure” Cindy McCain if She Calls Off the “Space Lasers Causing Our Fires”

GOP Offers to “Uncensure” Cindy McCain if She Calls Off the “Space Lasers Causing Our Fires”

Phoenix- The Arizona chapter of the Republican Party has graciously offered to remove the censure handed out to the widow of former U.S.Senator John McCain for “being the widow of former U.S. Senator John McCain”. John McCain was also censured by…

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Funny story: An Undefeated Wrestler on The Harvard Women’s Team Has Been Banned

An Undefeated Wrestler on The Harvard Women’s Team Has Been Banned

CAMBRIDGE, Massachusetts – (Sports Satire) – Word coming out of Harvard University, is that one of its star female wrestlers, Penny Saddlehorn, has just been banned. According to iNews reporter, Kitty Segovia, it appears that Saddlehorn, who had a…

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Funny story: Football Show Commentator Kept Calling Tyrone Mings "Tyrone Minge"

Football Show Commentator Kept Calling Tyrone Mings "Tyrone Minge"

There was much mirth and laughter during a TV football programme this afternoon, when the commentator on the Aston Villa versus Arsenal Premier League fixture kept referring to the home side's defender Tyrone Mings as 'Tyrone Minge', which was clearl…

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Funny story: Young Frankenstein Curse Claims Cloris Leachman

Young Frankenstein Curse Claims Cloris Leachman

LOS ANGELES – In yet another example of the curse on the actors in the movie Young Frankenstein, Cloris Leachman has passed away at age 94. This follows the long list of untimely deaths of the 1974 movie’s stars. Starting with Marty Feldman in 198…

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Funny story: “Fight Like Hell,” Said Trump

“Fight Like Hell,” Said Trump

Donald Trump says he’s innocent of inciting the riot at the Capitol Building on January 6. However, he’s on film, with audio, (his voice) speaking on January 6, in front of the White House, saying, "Fight like hell." Guilty as charged. Bingo! B…

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Funny story: Blame Democrats For Riots Not Trump

Blame Democrats For Riots Not Trump

The Trump defense is basically: Blame the riots on the Democrats but finish with the theory of free speech. Accusatory and hopeful, but no cigar. It’s like the little kid who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. “You filled the cookie j…

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Funny story: National Cycling 3-Abreast Championships Start Thursday

National Cycling 3-Abreast Championships Start Thursday

There was great excitement amongst ardent cycling fans this morning, when it was announced that the Cambodian National Cycling 3-Abreast Championships will be commencing in Battambang on Thursday morning, from 5 am onwards, and will end only when som…

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Funny story: Eric Trump Lets It Accidentally Slip, That His Daddy Is Planning on Escaping To Scotland

Eric Trump Lets It Accidentally Slip, That His Daddy Is Planning on Escaping To Scotland

BROOKLYN – (Satire News) – Eric Trump, Donald’s second and least-favorite son, was in the Big Apple getting a pubic procedure redone. He was interviewed by Fox News reporter Maria Bartiromo, and asked how his daddy was doing. Eric replied that…

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Funny story: Biden To Ban Pygmy-Dwarf Tossing

Biden To Ban Pygmy-Dwarf Tossing

BILLINGSGATE POST: With his forty-first executive order, President Biden banned the use of Pygmy-dwarfs in any games which utilize little people under four feet tall in a game similar to dart throwing - except, instead of using darts, the contesta…

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Funny story: Pelosi adds strip search now required of all Reps entering House Chambers

Pelosi adds strip search now required of all Reps entering House Chambers

Capitol police are not sure they have the personnel to carry out Ms. Pelosi's new orders, especially for bathroom breaks from the House floor. The issue rises from a purported metal detector violation by two Republican House members, Reps. Louie G…

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Funny story: Couple regret starting a Jason Statham Film Marathon

Couple regret starting a Jason Statham Film Marathon

Chutney on the Fritz couple Gary and Lorraine have begun to regret their plan to watch all of Jason Statham's films during the lockdown. 'I knew he had done a few films,' said Gary. 'I mean, there were the three Expendables films, the one with Mir…

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Funny story: Cuomo and Newsom can twirl; but can they hop?

Cuomo and Newsom can twirl; but can they hop?

Analysts say the two foremost governors, in charge of martializing the society at the cost of businesses dying, suicides, and other abuses, appear to be shifting their positions now that Trump is gone. Mr. Cuomo of New York and Mr. Newsom of Calif…

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Funny story: Woman Upset That Air Mexico Would Not Let Her Bring Her Emotional Burro on Board

Woman Upset That Air Mexico Would Not Let Her Bring Her Emotional Burro on Board

NUEVO LAREDO, Mexico – Mexico’s national news agency, El Ole News, confirmed that an elderly woman pitched a fit when airline employees informed her that she could not bring her emotional burro on board the Nuevo Laredo to Hong Kong flight. The wo…

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Funny story: Football Pundits Talk Bollox

Football Pundits Talk Bollox

When Liverpool put seven goals past Crystal Palace just seven short weeks ago on 19 December, the talk amongst football punditry was of "how far ahead of other football teams Jurgen Klopp's team are", how they were "uncatchable", and how "exquisite"…

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Funny story: Trump: "I Am Not A Quitter!"

Trump: "I Am Not A Quitter!"

Donald Trump emerged victorious from his second impeachment trial on Sunday, happy with his exoneration, but told the world's media that he was angry about the choice of wording used after the result. Trump, 74, told attendant journalists: "I…

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Funny story: What happened to all of Ronan Keating's Albums?

What happened to all of Ronan Keating's Albums?

It has been a mystery for years, but, apparently, Ronan Keating has sold many albums in his solo career and as a member of Boyzone, but these days no-one admits to having a CD in their collection. Along with Shania Twain's works, the Vengaboys and…

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Funny story: All Donald Trump Said Was, "Make Your Thinking Known."

All Donald Trump Said Was, "Make Your Thinking Known."

Donald Trump’s lawyers are presenting his defense. Trump is innocent. Donald Trump wasn’t firing up a mob. Nah! No way! All Trump said was, “Make your thinking known.” Or: “Folks,” (referring to a mob of goons and killers defecating in the ha…

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Funny story: Bedlam In Congress

Bedlam In Congress

A lady who is a Republican member of the US House of Representatives has threatened to put a bullet in the head of the Speaker of the House of Representatives, Nancy Pelosi. This same lady announced that she wanted former president, Barack Obama…

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Funny story: Trump And Biden Caught Singing Duet At Washington Karaoke Bar

Trump And Biden Caught Singing Duet At Washington Karaoke Bar

BILLINGSGATE POST: During this morning's White House briefing, Press Secretary Jen Psaki confirmed the rumor that President Biden and Donald Trump were seen together at Little Miss Whiskey's Golden Dollar last night, with their arms around each other…

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Funny story: GOP making whoopee !!

GOP making whoopee !!

Though impeachment proceedings loom, the outcome is already known, and Republicans are planning quite a show. No point spending money on external shysters when events warrant a jubilant internal shindig on the part of the GOP. They're sure not gonna…

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Funny story: Liverpool Boss Jürgen Klopp Facing Sack

Liverpool Boss Jürgen Klopp Facing Sack

There was drama brewing on Merseyside this evening after it became known that the Liverpool board of directors had arranged an emergency meeting at Anfield on Tuesday afternoon with the team's German coach, Jürgen Klopp. Last season's champions ar…

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Funny story: Cristiano Ronaldo To Wear Leather Thong Under His Shorts

Cristiano Ronaldo To Wear Leather Thong Under His Shorts

Cristiano Ronaldo, for years, the pin-up boy of European football, is in the news again this week, after he announced on social media that, from next week, he will start to wear a black leather thong underneath his football shorts. The Juventus s…

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Funny story: Mexico Reveals Its Stance on Atheist Women Who Pose in The Nude

Mexico Reveals Its Stance on Atheist Women Who Pose in The Nude

AGUASCALIENTES, Mexico - (Satire News) – Rosendo Reynosa, spokesman for the Republic of Mexico, has informed the international news media that, after months of discussion, the government has decided they will now take a stand on the issue of atheist…

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Funny story: Spinster buying Valentine's cards for Postman and Delivery Driver

Spinster buying Valentine's cards for Postman and Delivery Driver

Spinster Felicity Dowager from Chutney on the Fritz is buying Valentine's cards for her postman and delivery driver. Felicity said: 'I am 24, and have never been married, and I am always being told by unhelpful maiden aunts that my best years are…

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Funny story: American Idol Is Back For Season 19 With a Bang

American Idol Is Back For Season 19 With a Bang

GULFPORT, Mississippi – (Satire News) – TV’s top-rated singing show, American Idol, has returned for its 19th season, and there were some interesting contestants. AI's host, Ryan Seacrest, sported a brand new $2,000 hairdo, while Katy Perry was dr…

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Funny story: Secret Service Agent Mistakes Biden’s Package For Elderly Gerbil

Secret Service Agent Mistakes Biden’s Package For Elderly Gerbil

BILLINGSGATE POST: It had to happen sooner or later. While Vice-President under Barack Obama, there were complaints by female Secret Service Agents that they were uncomfortable when they were forced to watch Sleepy Joe take his morning swim in the Wh…

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Funny story: Fish caught swimming on German motorway!

Fish caught swimming on German motorway!

(NOT EDITED) Due to heavy rains bombarding certain parts of Germany strange occurrences have been spotted on a motorway between Cologne and Bonn. The motorway runs parallel to the River Rhine, and although flood-barriers have been erected, the Rhine…

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Funny story: Why Isn't The Super Bowl Known As The Superbowl?

Why Isn't The Super Bowl Known As The Superbowl?

When the Kansas City Chiefs take on the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in Super Bowl LV at the Raymond James Stadium in Tampa on Sunday night, there won't be many people asking why the game has a two-word moniker, but that was exactly the question one man was…

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Funny story: Paper Towels For Donald Trump

Paper Towels For Donald Trump

Just as Donald Trump threw rolls of paper towels to flood victims, the Republican Senate (except for seven Senators) threw Donald Trump 43 rolls of paper towels. He certainly must have been more grateful than the flood victims. Now he can run aga…

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