Khashoggi Murder: Crown Prince Confirms Punishment of "Culprits"
The Saudi crown prince, Mohammed bin Salman, has confirmed that he is to punish all eighteen "culprits" responsible for the murder of writer Jamal Khashoggi in Turkey, and that arrangements have been made for their public beheadings on Friday, as is...Read full story
Man Fell Off Motorbike Into Pile Of Cow Dung
Poor weather conditions in the Battambang area that left some roads barely passable, and others extremely treacherous, were the cause of several accidents on Monday, and one, in particular, involving a man who fell from a motorbike into a pile of cow...Read full story
Trump Instructs FBI To Arrest Obama For Returning Bomb
President Donald Trump has given orders for his predecessor, Barack Obama, to be arrested and brought in for questioning amid allegations that, after he received a suspicious package through the post, he tried to return it to its sender via the US Po...Read full story
Jamal Khashoggi - Keffiyeh Spotted On Another Man's Head
Authorities in Riyadh say there has been another possible breakthrough in the Jamal Khashoggi disappearance case, after the murdered dissident journalist's keffiyeh - the red-and-white-checked headscarf favored by almost all Arab men - was spotted in...Read full story
Girl Waved At Man, And He Waved Back
There was both pleasantness and confusion in equal amounts this weekend in the Battambang commune of Tapon, when a girl waved at a man who didn't recognise her, but he waved back anyway. Moys Kenwood, 55, was at the local market, knelt 'browsing'...Read full story
Obscene Word Wins Scrabble World Championship
The Scrabble World Championship being held at the Westfield centre in west London on Sunday, was won after a 5-hour battle, using a word that, frankly, I find difficult to repeat here. Amqold Scdgwipk, 53, from Tipperary in Ireland, sat opposite...Read full story
Halloween Event At School Was A Flop
A Halloween event 'organised' by a school was a spectacular flop, according to one of the people involved. The evening of 31 October is traditionally one of witches, pumpkins, skulls, skeletons, bats, black cats, spiders and ghosts, and that's wha...Read full story
Trump Says Democrats Should Thank Him for Being Such A Terrible President...Because they never would've won the House by such a wide margin without him!
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Joined: 03 January 2007
Stories Written: 70
Joined: 03 January 2007
Stories Written: 70
Christians Follow Pakistan with Campaign for Spoof Writer's Death Sentence
"We've had enough of his shit!" says His Holiness Pope Francis, sovereign of the Vatican City State in a personal encyclical on blasphemy, which was read out to congregations worldwide at the weekend. The person to whom he referred, is none other tha...Read full story
Saudi Arabia Guilty Of Crimes Against Islam
Saudi Arabia, the leader of the Muslim world, the origin and stronghold of the Islamic faith, and the country responsible for the murder of dissident journalist and Muslim, Jamal Khashoggi, is guilty of crime against Islam, says Turkish president, Re...Read full story
Saudi Consulate Open Again On Monday After 'Spring Clean'
ISTANBUL: The consulate of Saudi Arabia, closed since the world's press started to ask uncomfortable questions about the murder of dissident journalist, Jamal Khashoggi, will open its doors again on Monday after a 'spring clean'. Business will be...Read full story
Man's Headphones Are Fucked
A music lover in the Battambang commune of Tapon is ruing his decision to allow his two young children to use his headphones this evening, after discovering that they are now not quite as effective as they once were. The headphones, by Microlab, w...Read full story
Saudi Arabia 'deep bloke' offers formula for Assange case in London
A wave of news yesterday that Mr. Assange is under new danger has brought urgency to finally resolving his case. Mr. Assange’s mouth, as happened with Mr. Khashoggi, has become “far too dangerous for the ordinary person’s understanding of the new...Read full story
Man Questioned By Police Over His Use Of The Word 'Centigrade'
A teacher in a Battambang school has been questioned by students over his repeated use of the word 'centigrade' as a unit of heat measure. It felt like a police inquiry. The students looked confused when the teacher kept referring to 'centigrad...Read full story
Woman Kicks Man In Gonads
There was a painful end to a short conversation on the London Tube this morning, when a man who had tried to chat up a female fellow passenger received a kick in the gonads for his trouble. John O'Gape was travelling on the Northern Line having bo...Read full story
Jamal Khashoggi's Ghost Hands Itself In To Turkish Police
There was a shock in store for a group of Turkish policemen this morning, when the ghost of murdered Saudi Arabian dissident journalist, Jamal Khashoggi, presented itself at the counter of the main Istanbul police station.. The ghost, looking daze...Read full story