Funny story - CUNT-21 Vaccine Rollout Begins In Florida

CUNT-21 Vaccine Rollout Begins In Florida

The total number of confirmed cases of people being total cunts in Florida was nearing the 30 million mark on Thursday, as new infections continued to trend upward in a majority of counties despite an escalating vaccination campaign. Cases rose by…

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Funny story - Governments Admit They've Been Telling Lies About Things

Governments Admit They've Been Telling Lies About Things

There was trouble brewing on a massive scale this morning, when a series of news conferences around the globe admitted that various governments had been somewhat economical with the truth, and that most of everything they've ever told you has been a…

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Funny story - Meghan Markle Says Queen Tried To Flatten Her In A JCB

Meghan Markle Says Queen Tried To Flatten Her In A JCB

There was another stunning revelation in the Meghan Markle v. British Royal Family saga yesterday, when the wife of Prince Harry tweeted that, late last year, at the royal estate in Balmoral, the Queen tried to make Markle pancake-shaped, by driving…

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Funny story - No Funerals In Locale For Nine Days In A Row Now

No Funerals In Locale For Nine Days In A Row Now

Local historians were in a state of excited excitement and expectant expectation this morning, after it became clear that, in an unprecedented display of deathlessness, nobody has died in Tapon commune for nine days. The last funeral anyone can re…

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Funny story - German police investigate mysterious death of barking-mad-dog!

German police investigate mysterious death of barking-mad-dog!

(NOT EDITED) Eifel, Germany: Local German coppers raced to the scene of a tragic death in the early hours of Monday morning as local inhabitants of a tiny hamlet awoke to the sound of silence! Simon and Garfunkel, you must have been Disturbed to let…

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Funny story - Book Author goes on pub crawl in Timbuktu hoping to spend all his royalties!

Book Author goes on pub crawl in Timbuktu hoping to spend all his royalties!

(NOT EDITED) Breaking all Covid-19 rules, and regulations, an impoverished, tax-exiled Brit author living in Timbuktu received an E Mail from Kindle about royalties being transferred to his bank account in the UK! "Yippee," he screamed, and decid…

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Funny story - Missing Paper Clip Turns Up Safe And Sound

Missing Paper Clip Turns Up Safe And Sound

An ordinary office paper clip that was lost during some routine paperwork recently, has turned up safe and sound, calming fears that something sinister might have happened to it. It was discovered nestling underneath a computer keyboard earlier th…

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Funny story - Man Took Book To Family Gathering

Man Took Book To Family Gathering

Family get-togethers are usually a source of merriment, but when your in-laws are a bunch of retarded, filthy, backwoods beer monkeys who consider that singing out-of-tune to songs blasted out of 6-foot speakers is the height of cultural taste, you m…

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Funny story - Joe Biden Calls Putin A Killer

Joe Biden Calls Putin A Killer

On the diplomacy front today, President Biden called Russia’s Putin, a killer. Pass the blini with a side of caviar. Next move? Russia recalled the Russian ambassador to the United States. Like, wow! Clearly, Russia or Putin is ticked. Forget the…

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Funny story - Meghan Markle Says Queen Wanted Her Dead

Meghan Markle Says Queen Wanted Her Dead

They may be difficult for many people to believe, but the allegations of violent abuse visited upon her by the Queen of England, Elizabeth II, just keep pouring from the mouth of Meghan Markle, like a burst water main. Speaking in confidence to Op…

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Funny story - Man Got Spunk In His Eye

Man Got Spunk In His Eye

A man who is a confirmed habitual masturbator has told friends on social media of a recent incident in which an overzealous tug resulted in an 'unexpected outcome', when a blob of semen spurted out of his Jap's Eye into a corresponding orifice on his…

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Funny story - Wolves Eat Baby That It Was Hoped They Would Raise

Wolves Eat Baby That It Was Hoped They Would Raise

Reports from Burnley are indicating that a pack of wolves did not raise a baby they found abandoned in the woods, but, against all logic, ate it instead. Authorities told reporters that they found a knitted pink bobble hat, traces of blood, and ch…

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Seven day catch up

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Funny story - German cat gets soaked in hailstorm!

German cat gets soaked in hailstorm!

(NOT EDITED) March weather can sometimes be quite distressing for humans, and other animals. However, cats are especially sensitive to sudden outbursts of rain, snow, hail, and hate wet things descending rapidly from stormy heavens! One farm cat c…

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Funny story - The Vatican Is Against Love

The Vatican Is Against Love

Pope Francis has announced that the church can not bless same-sex marriages. So that seems to translate that the Pope does not condone happiness among all of his flock, but just some of his flock. Specifically, only those marriages between a man a…

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Funny story - Man Farts In Bath

Man Farts In Bath

There was a minor nautical disturbance in a relatively serene part of the country on Friday night, when a man having a bath broke wind, shattering the silence for others in the vicinity. The scene of the incident was the East Yorkshire resort of O…

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Funny story - Man Has 'That Monday Morning Feeling' On Tuesday

Man Has 'That Monday Morning Feeling' On Tuesday

We all know 'that Monday morning feeling', that general detestable loathing at the start of a new week at work which, after a relaxing weekend spent at home or doing some other pleasant activity, grates on one like the proverbial fingernails being sc…

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Funny story - Dutch Prostitutes claim, "A Blow Job" is a job just like any Job, and demand furlough payments!!

Dutch Prostitutes claim, "A Blow Job" is a job just like any Job, and demand furlough payments!!

(NOT EDITED) Holland, wonderful nation where 'anything goes' (in), smoking pot, sex between adults of all variations, Dykes on bikes, Red-Light district in the middle of Amsterdam, Prime Ministers taking their caravans on holidays, in fact, a totally…

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Funny story - Man Nearly Shit Himself During Journey To Work

Man Nearly Shit Himself During Journey To Work

A man who was being conveyed by motorcycle to his place of employment by his nasty, brainless, not to mention lazy step-daughter this morning, has said the youngster drove the vehicle so erratically and carelessly, that, several times, he feared for…

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Funny story - Man Is Being Treated Like A Sex Slave

Man Is Being Treated Like A Sex Slave

A married, middle-aged man who has been described as "having a tendency to invent the wildest exaggerations" has claimed that he is suffering the worst oppression imaginable, and being treated merely as a sex slave. The unfortunate individual is M…

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Funny story - Man Buys Yellow Shoes After Vendor Tells Him They'll Be A Hit With The Ladies

Man Buys Yellow Shoes After Vendor Tells Him They'll Be A Hit With The Ladies

A man who might be best described as 'a bit gullible', has revealed how he was persuaded by the vendor in a shoe shop to buy a pair of yellow shoes which, said the vendor, would be an instant hit with females, and would make him a 'lady magnet'. M…

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