New Toothpaste Has Controversial Name
A new toothpaste that, it's been claimed, offers extraordinary and revolutionary dental health protection, is at the center of a war of words between dentists - over its name, KUNNY. The toothpaste, which has come through much stringent testing wi...
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Trump Brothers Withdraw All of the U.S.Treasury's Money and Lose it All on Roulette
Las Vegas, NV Donald Trump, Jr., Eric Trump, and their brother-in-law, Jared Kushner, talked Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin into giving them a blank treasury check to bet with because they had a "sure thing." "Well, Donnie and I were talking ab...
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Still MORE Stuff from the Progressive Shoppers’ Mart – The Premier E-tailing Site for Enlightened Ideologues
Back by popular demand! We’ve been busy searching and nabbing the latest gems from your cherished lefty-progressive radicals. And now they’re here online! As always, to ensure you get your share of these treasures, you’ll need to move faster than...
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Ponzi Schemes Will Be the Next Big Investment During the Trump Administration
Economists have predicted that once the economy begins to tank due to high tariffs and voodoo trickle-down theories, some of the most popular investments will once more be Ponzi Schemes as investors once again look for a sure thing, with low investm...
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Trump Family Buys Angelfire, GeoCities, AltaVista, Ask Jeeves, and Netscape Web Browser
Bitcoin Volatility Won't Put Me Off, Says Moron
What Does it Take to Become a Good Private Investigator?
Plastic Free Markets
First white soft drink set to be unveiled
Mnuchin™ to compensate middle class for higher taxes with free Greenback Bathmats for the Rich
Too Many Cooks Spoilt Broth
Trump Sneaks in an Executive Order Putting His Face on the $100 Dollar Bill and Plans on Charging Royalties
Global burger producer decides to add 'real, fresh meat' to their burgers
UK Estate Agents post porno pictures on walls of their 'For Sale' houses!
Nevada Brothels to Offer 50% Discount to Incels
Red Hen Restaurants are Riding a Wave of Popularity
Stock Market Goes Down, Then Up, Then Down Again.
The stock market went up, then down, then up, then down, then up, then down. It then rose before dropping. This was quickly followed by an increase, which was interrupted by a fall. The market then went up, then back down. It went up, down, u...
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Little Chef Boss Sees Brexit Dividend from No Deal Chaos
Little Chef chairman, ardent Brexiteer, Conservative party donor, tax exile and fast food entrepreneur, Sir Tom Arto-Ketchup spoke out today about his hopes for a Brexit Dividend as a result of a no deal Brexit and Operation Stack bringing the roads...
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Breaking news…
Fake Friend
Surprise, surprise! Apparently, Omarosa was Trump’s fake friend. This is definitely sad.
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Seven day catch up
Check out anything you've missed with the archive:
Shoplifting Now UK's Fastest-growing Industry
There was brighter news for industry today, when it was announced that, despite poor performances in nearly all the UK's industry sectors, there was one major area of growth - shoplifting. Whilst energy, manufacturing, the services sector, financi...
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UK will get fatter and fatter after Brexit as junk food from the US replaces healthy Italian pasta!
The Beast from the East is about to be eclipsed as a tsunami approaches from the West smothering everything with fatty and sugar-filled food from the US!! A trade deal is imminent with the UK's greatest allies across the Atlantic and, instead of h...
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Dicken's three ghosts now doing everything by email
The ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and yet to come now do all of their work by email, it has been revealed. Speaking to us, for the first time since 2008, the three ghosts have told us that due to the amount of greed, and lack of basic humanity,...
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Supermarket Mergers, Pacts And Other Such Shit
There was a swift reaction to the news earlier this week that supermarket giants Asda and Sainsbury were to merge, when several other major players also announced their own intentions to join forces. First to react was Tesco, who revealed that the...
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US chickens doing a runner in Brit Chicken Run!
It seems that US over-bred chickens are not only being prepared for becoming nuggets in a global Chicken massacre machine, no! Due to mass breeding and pumping hormones through their tiny bodies, their brains are chemically developing too, and now in...
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Am I crazy, or am I lead deficient?
Tel Aviv IL: Pharmer Pharmaceuticals is drawing criticism over an alleged breakthrough psychiatric drug which is touted as a first in it's class. There are currently 3 groups of medications used for epilepsy, bipolar disorder, and schizophrenia. Amon...
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Man starts artisan coat hanger business
Tarquin Smythe Brassington Heckingthump III from Chutney on the Fritz has launched his own artisan coat-hanging business. Heckingthump III told us, ‘From where I see it, a house overlooking the better part of the Thames, the times are just right f...
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Chinese pot noodles hit by pizza tsunami!
The basic diet of billions of Chinese is being swept from under their bare feet by an 'Italian tsunami' causing a 'Domino' effect on the nutritional foundations of the most populated country on the planet! Chinese pot noodles, eaten by the rich, t...
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Latest Spoof Business Brief Headlines
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Mnuchin™ to Foreclose on Puetro Rico
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America's 'Statue Removal' Craze Triggers The Downfall Of An Icon
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Under Trump Tax Plan, the Rich Will Get Tax Cuts and the Middle Class Will Get Snack Vouchers
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Twitter tries to thin tempers through text tones
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First Tentacle Bank is set to do business on Planet Earth
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Artisan Coat-Hanger business becomes Artisan Paper-clip making business
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Prices Go Up 2% in Federal Reserve Board’s Ivory Tower Location
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Wetherspoon Chairman Denies Quitting Social Media and Shuts Pubs Instead
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Man Furious Over Burnt Corn Flakes
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Ivanka Trump Will Start Selling Designer Cages for Border Kids
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Giant US toy retailer buys up Chinese sex toy stock to avoid bankruptcy!
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Aimless Drifter Patents Lifestyle, Now a Multi-Millionaire
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Sales of Bullshit detectors fall
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Trump's New Tax Plan Will Give New Hope to Indigent Millionaires
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The Trump Economic Miracle Explained by His Followers Using One Easy Chart
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Trump Explains How Obama and Crooked Hillary Caused the Stock Market to Go Way Down
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Trump to slap dollars with HUGE tariff
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Vietnamese currency rockets - the dong is up
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Wetherspoon to Stop Selling Champagne and Prosecco
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Man Went To Tesco At 3am 'To See What It Would Be Like'
