The DC police department issued an arrest warrant for Donald J. Trump for inciting a riot.
Bellyaching since he lost the presidential election on November 3, 2020, Trump called for the Proud Boys and every other unemployed supporter to march to the U.S. Capitol to protest. Trump promised that he would also march along with them.
However, Trump claimed he was having a bone spurs attack at the last minute, and remained shuttered in the White House.
A riot ensued. The arrest warrant was issued.
Three police cars drove through the White House gates, sirens blaring, parked, sauntered into the White House, and asked for directions to the Oval Office.
“Why?”
The police explained they were there with a warrant for the arrest of Donald J. Trump.
The Secret Service collectively scratched their heads. "That's a new one on us."
Using their wristwatches, the Secret Service phoned it into their mothership of Homeland Security. Mother was quick to cooperate, and told the Secret Service they could go ahead and reveal Trump’s location, which was in the White House kitchen, where he was having his third dessert for the day.
The Secret Service escorted the police officers holding arrest warrants to the kitchen basement where Trump was located eating cake with a napkin tied around his neck. Read his Miranda rights, he was cuffed but managed to continue eating his cake.
“Why am I being arrested?”
“Inciting a riot.”
“It wasn’t me. It was Biden. Biden stole the election. You should arrest him and lock him up. He's the total zero.”
He was reminded that he was the one in handcuffs.
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