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Spoof news events on this day in history
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Top 10 Reasons Why Michael Jackson Needs to Go to Prison:
(2005) 10. Michael Jackson's nose. That disgusting chunk of plastic that Jackson now parades around as "his nose" is an affront to even the least talented Hollywood plastic surgeon. Michael Jackson has refused to face up to the fact tha...
Read full storyAmish Women Dress Sexy
(2007) Yes, the times indeed are changing, even among such staunch defenders of tradition as the Amish.
Read full storyWoman With World's Largest Vagina Visited by Ghost of Johnny Cash
(2009) RENO, NV - While spending a night at the Reno Casino Hotel, the woman with the world's largest vagina was visited by the ghost of The Man In Black, say sources. Initial reports suggest the hotel was built on the same spot Cash allegedly shot a man,...
Read full storyDiana Degarmo's Meltdown
(2004) Diana Degarmo finally broke down and cried today. "I'm so f***in' sick and tired of being the nice and sweet girl. I ain't got no street cred since doing this whack American Idol. People don't even think I'm latina enough. It...
Read full storyPirates Orlando Bloom Naked on Stage with Nurse Gladys
(2007) Pirates of the Caribbean star Orlando Bloom has revealed he is planning to get back to basics by romping naked on stage with Nurse Gladys of "Open all Hours" fame.
Read full storyThe List of 10 Reasons Why Congressman Ron Paul Says America Should Elect Him To Be The Next President
(2012) Congressman Ron Paul of Texas was recently asked how he felt running in the GOP presidential race for the highest office in the land. The spry 76-year-old smiled and remarked that he felt as happy as a woodpecker in a Popsicle stick factory. The veteran politician from Texas is no stranger to the harsh world of political mudslinging. Earlier this year when Michele Bachmann stated that he...
Read full storyAdam Lambert To Record a Duet With Hollie Steel
(2009) SAN DIEGO, California - American Idol runnerup Adam Lambert has stated that he will be recording a song with Britain's Got Talent contestant Holly Steel. The 10-year-old Steel, who is the biological granddaughter of Julie Andrews first wrote Lambe...
Read full storyTom Cruise Tells North Dakota High School Class "You Can Do It!"
(2015) Shit City, North Dakota - Celebrity Tom Cruise likes to give back. Having given millions of dollars to homeless men and women throughout Canada and New Zealand, the actor says he now wishes to "deign to condescend to backwoods hicks" and has schedul...
Read full storyBritains Got Talent- Amanda Holden is a fake and sniffs onions to make her cry!
(2009) On the penultimate semi-final Amanda Holden, 43 age and 43 Botox injections was caught cutting up onions under her desk to evoke tears. An inside source said this is due to botox rendering her tear ducts redundant, but mainly because she is a heartl...
Read full storyMiddlesbrough man competes to enter Book of World Records for stinkiest feet
(2010) 'Spud' Wilkinson, of Thorntree, Middlesbrough, is hoping to be in the Book of World Records soon as 'the man with the World's Stinkiest Feet. Spud's wife 'Daisy' wrote to the Panel of Judges regarding Spud's smelly appendages in the hope's that he...
Read full storyU.S. Sends Jedis to Iraq
(2005) Washington D.C.- During a Department of Defense press conference on Friday, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld announced that the United States would deploy it's brigades of Jedi Knights to the war in Iraq. "Only the Jedi can restore ord...
Read full storyMan Bitten in Dog Park, By Another Man!
(2010) Westchester, New York . . . When police were called to the local dog park to deal with a bite, they assumed that a dog had done the biting. No way! Man's best friends were totally innocent. Believe it or not, it was a man who had bitten another ma...
Read full storyTSA Screeners Confiscate Fruit Trees, Detain SNL Actor
(2005) This afternoon airport security screeners at a Florida airport detained two suspicious individuals and confiscated several mango trees that the pair attempted to smuggle through a security checkpoint.
Read full storyTwo Girls stoned outside New York Mosque
(2014) It is being reported that two 18-year-old girls have been stoned to outside a Mosque in New York. The two girls, Sarah Brooks and Kim Beasley, were reportedly high on marijuana after rolling two joints behind the Muslim place of worship in Queens.
Read full storyTeddy Sheringham: "Ramsay made a meal of it!"
(2012) Teddy Sheringham has been explaining what was behind his 'tasty' foul on Gordon Ramsay during the recent Soccer Aid match that put the chef in hospital. It seems to have been the final course in a culinary food feud that goes back years. "I'm n...
Read full storyEddie Albert sightings rampant in U.S.
(2005) GRAND MARSHALL, Texas -- Eddie Albert, the versatile actor on Broadway, in movies and on television, known most for his role on Green Acres, died at his home in the Pacific Palisades area of California recently.
Read full storyPrison Abuse Scandal Linked to George W. Bush's Dog
(2004) Washington, DC (AP) Sources at the Pentagon admitted this morning that the dog collars and leashes used in the abuse of Iraqi detainees at the Abu...
Read full storyJustin Bieber and Selena Gomez Vacationing In Hawaii And Necking On The Beach Like There's No Tomorrow
(2011) HONOLULU - The Pacific Ocean waves were cascading onto the scenic beach as the Hawaiian evening breeze blew ever so gently causing the majestic palm trees to sway in the flaming crimson Polynesian sky. And laying out on an isolated portion of the beach were heartthrob sensations Justin Bieber and his girlfriend Selena Gomez. The two had rubbed suntan lotion on each other and were oblivious to t...
Read full storyStarbucks Completes Death Star; World Takeover Imminent
(2004) Seattle, WA-Starbucks Coffee Inc announced Wednesday that its supreme plan for world domination will be placed into effect a month early as their Death Star orbiting seven hundred miles off Earth has been completed ahead of schedule.
Read full storyBritain's Youngest Case Of Juvenile Dementia Reported
(2008) A boy from Coventry has become the youngest-ever reported case of an affliction that is sweeping Britain, when he was diagnosed by his mum as suffering from Juvenile Dementia. Sharon Chavez, of the Burberry Estate in the city, said her 5-year-old...
Read full storyFDA Warns Botox Causes Infection and Death
(2008) WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - The FDA has announced that after intensive investigations it has determined that Botox injections lead to infection and death.
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