NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – It is no secret that Marjorie Taylor Greene has become the most hated, despised, piece-of-shit politician in the entire United States, and there are lots of them!
The National Whispers News Agency has just named Marjorie Taylor Greene as “The Menopausal Female Version of Adolf Hitler.”
Oprah Winfrey recently sat down with MTG at Winfrey’s The Winds of Chicago 5-Star Hotel.
OPRAH: So Marjorie, is that your real first name?
MARJORIE: No it isn’t. And furthermore no one really knows my real first name, and I won’t be telling you that’s for sure.
OPRAH: Well, let me just say that I spoke with Andy Cohen, who is considered to be the nation’s #1 information guru, and he told me that your real first name is Dabbasheena.
MARJORIE: I don’t like Andy Cohen, and I’m starting to not like you.
OPRAH: Well let me say that the feeling is mutual. And I can see why you are the most hated, evil, nasty, bitch ho in America.
MARJORIE: Well, that’s just your opinion. And I want to let you that I have lots of admirers.
OPRAH: Say what bitch? Like who?
MARJORIE: Like Donald Trump, my ex-boyfriend Matt Gaetz, Jim Jordan, Mitch McConnell, and Laura Ingraham.
OPRAH: Laura Ingraham hates your cellulite-covered ass, Mitch says you look like Roy Rogers’s horse Trigger, Jim, who used to wrestle his wrestling students in the nude, says you look like a straw broom with acne, and the Trumptard says he wouldn’t grab your pussy for all the gold in Fort Knox.
MARJORIE: You forgot Matty.
OPRAH: Oh yes Matt “The Potato Face Predator” Gaetz, your old boyfriend, who dumped you for a real woman, told Tucker Carlson that he can't stand your Preparation H smelling body.
MARJORIE: He did not dump me you blimp-looking witch. He merely broke up with me because I did not want to have his baby.
OPRAH: Well hallelujah, and thank goodness for that because I hate to think what a Matt Gaetz-Marjorie Taylor Greene baby would look like.
MARJORIE: Probably like yours and Gayle King’s baby; except white and privileged.
OPRAH: Well that just shows how stupid your are. Gayle is a woman and I am a woman – so there is no way that the two of us could have a biological baby; didn't you take math in high school?
MARJORIE: Well I heard from Donald Trump that you actually have a ding dong.
OPRAH: Well lemmy say dis you scum-sucking slut. I do not have a ding dong. It just so happens that I have a very pronounced clitoris, and yes, although it may look like a pecker, it ain’t, so there.
MARJORIE: I have to go now.
OPRAH: Yes, I’m sure you have to run home and go feed your pet vulture. Bye Felicia!
MARJORIE: Bite my hooha, Jemina.
OPRAH: Get your pimply old ass outta my hotel you GOP salt shaker!
[EDITOR’S NOTE: The term salt shaker refers to a loose woman who gets passed around by lots and lots of men].