The Last Straw: Environmentalists ban Plastic Ones
Berkeley, CA. Those far-left, socialist-environmentalists at the University of California can't stop banning popular, useful things. Fresh from their success in banning the deliberately misnamed "single use" plastic bag, most of which were used multi...
Read full storyMan Who Eats A Lot Of Fish Develops A Hankering For The Sea
A man who eats an astonishing amount of fish and chips for his tea, has revealed how, recently, he has experienced a strange, burning inner passion to live in the sea. Moys Kenwood, 55, eats a plate of fish and chips, on average, four times a week...
Read full storyMan Experiences His Hottest Weather Ever, As His Blood Starts To Boil
Steamy-hot temperatures were almost too much for one man yesterday, when contrary to the laws of human biology, his blood started to boil. Moys Kenwood, 55, had been teaching in the air-conditioned classrooms at the school where he works, when he...
Read full storyQuantum Mechanics Book Left Man Stumped
A text book about Quantum Mechanics that one man pulled off a library shelf because he'd always fancied learning about what Quantum Mechanics really were, probably made him wish he hadn't bothered when he discovered that the subject was rather too ba...
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Employee Login System Became More Frustrating For Local Workers
O2 Network Collapse Causes Chaos
Vaping Soon To Be A Thing Of The Past
Polar Bears Are Changing Color
Scientists: Human ancestors and a guy named Dennis "mate with anything vaguely human"
Giant Bee Discovery Is Breathtakingly Pointless, Scientists Told
NASA Explains InSight Probe And All Other Space Exploration
Unpaid Blog Writer Screams Desperately While Being Pulled Away From Laptop
Apes Will Speak English, Say Scientists
Trump Outlaws New "Trump Filter" That is Popular in the Scientific Community
War on Insects edges closer to victory
Are Coincidences Just a Coincidence, Déjà Vu or Imaginary?
Scientists Think They Know Which Galaxy Has Donald Trump Under Its Control
Science Town, USA Scientists have long suspected that President Trump is under the control of an alien force. But for a long time they thought it was only Russia. However, scientists figured that even Russia couldn't benefit from all the hare-bra...
Read full storyEyecam 'Thought Camera' Takes Pictures Of What You Think
A new camera that will shortly be on the market, takes photographic images of, not only what is directly in front of the aperture, but also the very thoughts that are in your mind, or, to describe the process even more specifically, 'what you are thi...
Read full storyMan invents time machine, travels 20 seconds backwards in time.
Dave Bennet, Utah, admits that he “could have made more” of his degree in theoretical physics after he succeeded in sending himself backwards in time by twenty seconds last week. “Yeah, a lot of people are asking me was it worth it. I got to go b...
Read full storyInstances of married men having a stroke in bed is on the rise
Research showing a worrying rise in married 35-50 year old males has been published by members of a leading medical council. During the first 6 months of this year, there was a 20% increase in reports of men having had a stroke in bed, especially...
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Search For Ernest Shackleton Ship Abandoned After Everything Lost
A search for Sir Ernest Shackleton's ship, Endurance, lost in the icy floes of the Antarctic in 1915, has been called off after a piece of equipment critical to the search was also lost. After months of trying to survive in extreme conditions whe...
Read full storyG20 Summit Hears That Global Warming Is Good News For Marine Animals
Delegates at the G20 summit in Buenos Aires watched and listened in a hypnotized silence this afternoon, as they were informed by a mystery speaker that, contrary to popular opinion, Global Warming is actually a good thing - for all the creatures tha...
Read full storyWorld Population Falling Due To LGBT Tolerance
The population of the world - known as the 'World Population' - is set to decrease rapidly in the future, due, not to environmental issues, disease, potential pandemics, drought or famine, but to the bland acceptance of issues concerning human sexual...
Read full storyChinese Lunar Rover and Lander Obsessed with Selfies
A Chinese rover and lander have taken multiple images of each other and themselves on the Moon's surface, and despite Chinese mission control scientists' best efforts, they refuse to stop doing so. The Chinese space agency says the spacecraft ar...
Read full storyChocolate bar lands on Mars!
After months of travelling through outer space, propelled in a can of high-energy, red Bull-shit, a chocolate bar in a red tin-can, has landed successfully on planet Mars! Martians, with no ears, approaching the strange object having not seen 200...
Read full storyNASA creates a time machine for exploration
LOGIC NEWS: NASA has released the first images of data collected from the Spectra 1 and Spectra 2 time rovers sent into the future 3.2 million years from now. Spectra 1 was sent to Mars while Spectra 2 was sent to Earth. The time rovers successfu...
Read full storyNewton and Einstein "Were Wrong" Says Indian Science Congress
The findings of Sir Isaac Newton and Albert Einstein were rubbished by some "academics" at the 106th Indian Science Congress which ran from 3-7 January. Hindu mythology and religion-based theories have increasingly become part of its agenda. Scie...
Read full storyTrump Signs Executive Order Requiring all Nuclear Reactors To Run on Coal
President Trump has signed an executive order with new Energy rules. The first is that all nuclear reactors must switch to coal as an energy source. Trump's new rules also require burning books to use for heat and energy, since, as Trump says, "n...
Read full storyLatest Spoof Science & Technology Headlines
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Man Invents Breakthrough Contraption That Assist Old People Who Are Always Forgetting Shit
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Entire programming team at MacroHard blow their legs clean off
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Scientific Community Makes One Last Attempt to Cure Trump
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NASA InSight Probe Finds Mars Is Made Of Chocolate
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Man Buys Black-And-White TV Set
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Dark Matter "Needs to Lighten Up" Says Head of CERN
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Medical Association Declares Eggs are Bad, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays
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Snow Forecast For Switzerland Again
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Cheaply Purchased Trac Phone Runs Out Of Minutes As Man Desperately Tries To Provide Advice To Others
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Inspiring: Man logging 2,848 hours into new Call of Duty game has now spent more time fighting nazis than grandfather did.
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Moon Almost Collided With Planet Earth!
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Man reads YouTube comments
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Scientists announce first underwearable smartass phone
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Extraterrestrial object Oumuamua turns out to be a giant sex-aid
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Updated Version of Electronic Ouija Board Fails to Produce Terrifying Ghostly or Demonic Activity
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Man Sucked Inside Hadron Collider
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2019 - The First Time For 100 Years That The Four Digits Have Added Up To 12
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Man Sustained Eye Injury Looking For Super Blood Red Wolf Sun
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New Floor Cleaning Machine With 12-Inch, Debris-Expelling Chute Leaves Factory Workers Extremely Pissed Off
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Experts Applaud $94 TRILLION "Green Tech" Proposal
