Trump Suspends the Laws of Science
Mar-A-Lago, FL Declaring martial law on scientists, President Donald Trump suspended all the rules of Science and forbade anyone to use or follow them until the ban is lifted. Trump would only say that it was a matter of national security. "It se...
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Science news roundup
Science is fun, as well as useful. Hi, my name's Brian Dix, from Internet University. Let's take a look at what's happening in the amazing world of science. This week, the element Clitorium was discovered. It had been predicted for centuries, but...
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Obesity Linked To Diet Choices
A study into the causes of obesity has concluded that the condition is almost certainly linked to whatever sufferers have stuffed down their gullets. The five-minute study undertaken by four men in a west Hull pub found that excessive bingeing on...
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Man Decided To Have A Garden Fire And Put A Lot Of Aerosol Cans On It To See What Would Happen
A man who had nothing better to do at the weekend, decided to have a fire in his back garden, and put some old, empty aerosol cans he had in his garage, on the fire, to see what would happen. Moys Kenwood had the idea whilst looking at a can of ae...
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Was Hitler an alien?
It is one of the greatest questions of modern science: was Nazi dictator and moustache model, Adolf Hitler, actually an alien from outer space? Many believe he was. Geoff Derp from the University of Dusseldorf has recently completed a study of eve...
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FDA shakes heads after latest alleged vaccine complication
The FDA is shaking their heads after the latest alleged side-effect of vaccines. Jennifer Mowery claims that her daughter, Jessica, grew a second head after the latest round of vaccines. To further complicate matters, Jessica may be required by la...
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Iceland Is Melting
Aliens On Way To Earth
Apollo 14 Golf Balls May Never Be Found
Hot Weather To Continue Until It Cools Down A Bit
Teacher Spent Entire Term Trying To Teach Students About Token Sea Creatures
The Arctic Circle Doesn't Exist!
Area 51 "Crawling With Aliens"
North Pole is Missing - in More Ways Than One
Michael Jackson Apollo 14 Rumor Denied
Erectile Dysfunction Man Cured By Sexy Wench With Big Oomlaaters
Could American Politics Create Hyper-Alternate Quantum Vortex?
Spirulina Is Soylent Green
The FDA orders vape juice to taste like fecal matter in light of youth vaping crisis
To stem the tide of youth smokers and those using vaping products such as Juul devices, the FDA will be adding numerous new regulations for cigarettes and vaping products. In addition to banning menthol cigarettes to help reduce the number of youth a...
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Exoplanets Inhabitable? Religious Scholars Have Work To Do
When NASA's Exoplanet division released the startling information that as many as 10 Exoplanets in other solar systems may have the capability of sustaining life, the prospect of life on Gj 357d not only excited those who want to escape the daily com...
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Possible link between measles vaccine and measles
Scientists claim to have found a link between the popular measles vaccine and the likelihood of contracting measles. According to studies by the University of Bern, children who did not receive the vaccine were more likely to get the disease later in...
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Trump Chastises Scientists For Never Agreeing With Him
Science Town, USA President Donald Trump has spoken out against scientists in his latest statement. He is mad because none of the scientists would validate or verify all the things he made up. "That Danish lady trying to tell me that crazy wind p...
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Weather Forecast For Tomorrow
The extremely hot weather that's being enjoyed by the whole of the UK is set to continue during the first half of this week, but after that, it's going to be back to normal for most of us. Record temperatures have been the order of the day, along...
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Scientists Still Looking for a Cure for Whatever It Is That Trump's Got
Science Town, USA "We knew it was going to be bad once we started looking into it" spoke a leading scientist at the most recent Science Convention. "Yes, but who would have thought it could be THIS bad--and it's spread to the whole family!" said...
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Don't Forget To Set Your Clocks Back One Hour, Then Ahead One Hour
Daylights Wasting Time is upon us. Tomorrow morning at precisely 2 a.m., set your clocks back to 1 a.m. Then, wait an hour for it to turn 2 a.m. again. This time, set the clock ahead one hour to 3 a.m. And that's it. You're all set. You won't h...
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Harry Maguire To Push Some Buttons On The Hadron Collider
Harry Maguire, the Manchester United central defender, has announced he will be flying to Geneva next week, to travel to Cern where scientists continue to work on the Hadron Collider, a big machine with which they are attempting to recreate the condi...
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NASA celebrate 50 years of pretending to go to the Moon
It was fifty years ago this week, that NASA sent a manned rocket to the Moon, or so they claimed. When Neil Armstrong stepped onto the lunar surface, he should have drowned in soft cheese. Instead, he calmly said the line, "That's one small step for...
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Student Allowed To Eat A Mentos Mint, Then Drink Coke, "In The Name Of Science"
A science teacher at a school has said that he gave permission to one of his students to undertake the extraordinarily dangerous challenge of eating a Mentos mint and then quoffing a bottle of Coca Cola, "for the benefit of the other students", and "...
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Scientists Nominate Donald Trump to be the First Man on Mars
Science Town, USA In an inspiring show of patriotism, a majority of scientists believe that President Trump should have the honor of being the first man on Mars. "I think Trump has proved he has the stamina, persistence, and resiliency to make the...
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Girl Asked Teacher To Spell Difficult Word
A schoolteacher was 'taken aback' last week, by a girl's seeming lack of spelling ability in the English language. A Science class of 9-year-old students, having been asked to take five objects from their bags, list them, and say whether they thou...
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Canada's Famed Ice Hills Disappearing; Global Warming Victims
Tuktovaktuk [Tuk], Northwest Territories, Canada. Special to The Spoof - via dogsled. Canada's famed ice hills, formally known as pingos, have fallen victim to global warming. The Canadian government has undertaken drastic countermeasures in an attem...
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World's most hated whale safe from extinction
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Abacus still works after 66 years in loft
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Man's Telephone Has Lost Its Color Function, And Is Now Black-And-White Only, Like 'Rumble Fish' (1983)
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Mad Trump Disease and the Nationalist Voter
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China To Repair Ozone Layer With Steamed Minced Pork Buns
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Minestrone fad still spreading
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Man Says There's No Scientific Basis Behind 'She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not'
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European Heatwave: Woman Fries Egg On Her Husband's Baldpatch
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Chemistry Weekly Round-Up
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Greta Thunberg Is Planet Earth's Number One Enemy
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Simple brain zapper gives older adults the cognitive skills of a 20 year old
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Iceland launches new low cost cryonics service
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Cheese Discovered On Mouse's Whiskers
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Concern grows over DeepMind's video game addiction
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Is Trump A Stable Genius?
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Trump Threatens to Send Scientists That Talk About Global Warming to Jail for Spreading Fake News
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Baker Devoted Lifetime to Creating Heels-Only Loaf
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Gecko Eaten By Army Of Ants
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Longest Day Is Good News For Little Pigs
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Fortnite powers down. Millions of boys reunited with loved ones
