NASA Photo Shows Planets Are Moving Closer Together At Alarming Rate
Scientists at NASA are becoming increasingly concerned at what they say is "a major change in the set-up of the Solar System", after photographic images were transmitted back to Earth from a little-known satellite which is something to do with gettin…Read full story
Eating Toast Saves Lives Scientists Discover!
(NOT EDITED) A life-saving bi-product of the vaccination effort has been discovered by scientists who had no idea how important it is, eating toast! Global scientists involved in diverse vaccination projects have two common denominators, no sex, a…Read full story
Man Bins His Alexa After He Finds It Going Through His Stuff
New technology is all very nice, but when you find it spying on you, or going through your private possessions, it has surely overstepped the boundary, outlived its usefulness, and needs to go, and that's what happened to one man this week, when he f…Read full story
Germany Develops Robots That Can Build Other Robots
BERLIN – (Satire News) – The Berlin Guten Morgen Gazette has just divulged that Konig Wilhelm Inc. has invented a robot that can make other robots. The process was 17 years in the developmental stage, and was postponed twice due to the robots that…Read full story
Man Now Worried That Alexa Knows His Spoof Password
A man who has recently been experiencing problems with his Alexa is now concerned that the virtual assistant might have been spying on him behind his back, and may now be able to gain access to one of his private online accounts. Myke Woodson, 57,…Read full story
NASA lands first pork faggots on Mars
The North American Sausage Association (NASA) have achieved another first - landing the first pork faggots on another planet. They are also the first sausage-like product of any type to visit another world. The triumph is thanks to butcher Geoff G…Read full story
Man Doesn't Give A Flying Fuck About Space Exploration
Space, the race to the stars, boldly going where no man has gone before, and the colonization of other planets - the stuff of dreams! But not for one man, who spoke up loudly this week, saying that, as far as he was concerned, he really couldn't…Read full story
New Vaccine Developed That Will Encourage Anti-vaccine Protesters To Take Vaccines
A major pharmaceutical company has announced that it has developed a new vaccine specifically to treat those people who are suspicious of taking vaccines. The new vaccine, given the name Controlaform, has been developed in rapid time, to meet the…Read full story
Alexa Refuses To Toss Man Off
It's been said that the new state-of-the-art modern technology can do anything humans can do, and do it a lot better and far more efficiently into the bargain, but there was disappointment in store for one man at the weekend, when he commanded his Al…Read full story
NASA Admits That The Martian Land Rover Has Been Stolen
HOUSTON – (Satire News) – NASA is in a state of shock, as reports from Satellite Ferdinand Magellan X3 have just reported that the Mars Land Rover is missing. Word is that Perseverance was last heard from at 2:30 a.m. (Martian Standard Time). A N…Read full story
Milk straight from the Cow's Udder makes men hornier than swallowing Viagra!
(NOT EDITED) Scientists at the Robert Koch Institute in Berlin, Germany, working overtime in last ditch attempts to make head or tail about a certain pandemic tormenting the planet, have realised their sex-lives are suffering! Working 24 hour shif…Read full story
Modern men do not know which position it is best to pee!
(NOT EDITED) The scientific fraternity, although being confronted with a global pandemic, have not forgotten one of the most important issues the global male population has to deal with; which position is the best for males to pee in? Females real…Read full story
Mars landing is a massive marketing hoax claim inhabitants of other planets in our solar system!
(NOT EDITED) Aliens inhabiting planets in our solar system are up-in-arms (We don't quite know how many arms aliens have) because they believe the Mars landing was a fake, massive publicity stunt, sponsored by a transvestite Bounty-Hunter smelling of…Read full story
Masturbating now accepted as a healthy pastime during lockdown!
(NOT EDITED) Scientist studying anti-social human behaviour during lockdown have discovered that many taboo habits should now be fully accepted as NORMAL (Whatever that is!). The study looked at all age categories from teeny to OAP and came up wit…Read full story
The Perseverance Land Rover Discovers Rattlesnakes on Mars
HOUSTON – (Satire News) – NASA officials are amazingly excited at photos that have just been beamed back to Earth from the Red Planet, which clearly show several rattlesnakes. The Mars rover nicknamed Bonnie, after the infamous Depression female m…Read full story
Scientists prove a 'Bad Day at the Office' is only curable by going back to bed!
(NOT EDITED) Sometimes everything goes 'pear shape' in one day! So, a group of over-worked Dutch psychiatrists have engaged a team of scientists to find a solution for this ever-increasing syndrome. This frustrating syndrome has tripled ever sinc…Read full story
Oceanic Scientists Discover That The Bermuda Triangle is Really a Trapezoid
MIAMI – (Satire News) – A group of oceanic scientists have just announced that the mysteriously mystical Bermuda Triangle is actually not a triangle, but a trapezoid. Dr. Filbert R. Fibbingshire stated that the somewhat scary, somewhat legendary B…Read full story
Elon Musk’s New Planetary Telescope is The Most Powerful in The World
HOUSTON, Texas – (Satire News) – The richest man in the world, Elon Musk has just developed the amazing Musk Busybody Planetary Telescope, which he has nicknamed "Ringo". The entrepreneur, who is the father of the Tesla, the SpaceX Starship, and…Read full story
Elon Musk is Building The World’s Most Amazing Floating Asteroid Belt Station
HOUSTON – (Satire News) – Reports coming out of Houston state that the richest man in the world, Elon Musk, is in the process of building what will be a truly astonishing Floating Asteroid Belt Station. The station named Vesuvius, after his pet sa…Read full story