Vice-President Kamala Harris Says That The Turncoat, Traitor Senator Joe Manchin Needs To Stop Acting Like a Pu$$y and Resign
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Ipso Facto News is reporting that Vice-President Harris has more cojones than Joe Manchin, Mitch McConnell, Matt Gaetz, and Kevin McCarthy combined. Nancy Pelosi and Ricky Gervais totally agree with that statemen…
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Biden considering candidates for New Hobgoblin Awards—including himself
On the heels of a storm of criticism against health advisor Anthony Fauci, President Biden has stepped forward to defend his embattled aide. Mr. Fauci said this about masks, then something else as the pandemic moved on. Plus he said this about…
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A Naked Female Walmart Shopper Throws a Fit When A Security Guard Frisks Her
PICKLE TREE, Ohio – (Satire News) - A woman who walked into a local Walmart totally nude told one of the retail salesclerks that she was going to buy clothes and underwear. The clerk quickly called the store security guard, since the female was c…
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Why Is It That Bald Headed Kids Always Seem To Get Cancer? Asks Wanker.
FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. — After friends, family and classmates came together to support a South Florida kid fighting cancer local man, Kevin Rogerson, was overheard asking his wife why was it that a disproportionate of bald children seemed to catch ca…
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Manhattan Shrink Fantasizes Unloading Revolver Into Head Of White Person
BILLINGSGATE POST: Elmer Smuckmeister, a retired farmer living in Beaver Crossing, Nebraska, was proud of the Yale diploma he had nailed to the wall of his barn, right next to a picture of his 4-H heifer, Ellie, who won first prize at the 1960 State…
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Judge Orders Babylon Bee to Write Clever, Witty Stories So Critics Will Know It’s Satire
Washington - The judge presiding over a libel suit brought by the owners of alleged political satire site Babylon Bee against CNN and New York Times told the plaintiffs in the case to start running stories that are humorous, witty and clever instead…
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Who Took Trump To The Woodshed?
California considering cruise ship voyages and additional prize packages to encourage getting the jab
On Memorial Day: An Old Friend
North Shore tough bird, Vinnie the Turkey is bad news for bad guys & bad drivers
Trump Claims Nancy Poozleosi Could Eat Ice Cream With Her Mask On
Vanessa Trump snags Secret Service guy to beat on Eric and Don Jr.
"Little Old Lady" deemed most stealthy threat for 13th straight year
Where’s Hunter Update: Harvesting Bat Guano In Galapagos
Trump U Commencement, Mike Lindel: "Let's all be Trumps!"
Republican Party Pay Trump Kids To Investigate 2020 Voter Fraud
Trump University’s 2021 Commencement Speaker: Mike Lindell
The Supreme Court Is Getting Into Panties Again
Fauci Explains Wuhan Lab Leak Was Meant to Hurt Only China
In the face of accusations that the National Institutes of Health funded dangerous gain of function research at the Wuhan Institute of Virology resulting in the outbreak of a novel new coronavirus, Anthony Fauci explained that the Wuhan lab leak was…
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Trump sets Ted Cruz's house on fire to wrap up bullying session; Cruz says "it was an honor"
It may be an understatement to say it was a challenging evening for Senator Ted Cruz as he and wife Heidi opened their home for a visit with the Trumps. Seemed Donald J. was primed for bullying and Cruz had a giant bulls eye on his forehead. Trump an…
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Facebook And Twitter Ban The Road Runner
BILLINGSGATE POST: If Wile E Biden had his way, the Trump Runner would be banned from Planet Earth - and beyond. It’s nightfall in the Sonoran Desert. For as long as anyone can remember, when the relentless sun goes down, falling below the horiz…
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Bigfoot spotted in upstate bar: Sat alone drinking in a corner booth, left a strange tip
Patrons thought last night was just another night at The Backroom Lounge just outside Rochester. Very few noticed the “giant hairy guy” who sat brooding in a far corner, beyond the pool table, by the Men’s bathroom. “He kept his head down and lo…
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Biden invites spoofers Jaggedone and Dr Billingsgate to White House for pow wow
President Biden surprised more than a few people today when he issued invitations to two top spoofers known as Jaggedone and Dr Billingsgate to meet with him at the White House. Asked his reasoning, Biden said “It’s time we get up close and perso…
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New Mandate Requires US Citizens to Wear 3 Masks at All Times
Citing a recent upsurge in the number of COVID-19 cases, the Center for Disease Control has issued a tightening of safety precautions out of an over-abundance of caution. All US citizens must wear 3 levels of protection AT ALL TIMES. It must cove…
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Biden Cites “Row vs Wade” - Orders Blockade Of All Afghanistan Seaports
BILLINGSGATE POST: To placate conservative members of Congress regarding his order to have all of our troops out of Afghanistan by July 1st, President Biden announced today, “That under the authority granted to him under the ‘Row vs Wade Amendment’…
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Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy Promotes Marjorie Taylor Greene to Newly Formed Committee
Washington, D. C.--Minority leader Kevin McCarthy today announced that Marjorie Taylor Greene, in light of her recent statement comparing mask wearing mandates nationwide to Jews being persecuted in Nazi Germany, would be reassigned from her committe…
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"Just Reinstate Donald Trump As President"
One of Donald Trump’s lawyers made another mindless statement while promoting the election conspiracy. “Donald Trump can simply be reinstated into the White House.” The crowd was said to have cheered in response to her baseless claim. They can do…
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Fauci flees to Canada; detained at border for interview with Tucker Carlson
Breaking: Washington insiders report a dynamic new development in the affairs of Mr. Biden's health advisor, Anthony Fauci. Apparently, Dr. Fauci was considering time-off in Canada when border officials sequestered him at an EconoLodge motel for f…
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The US Supreme Court Destroys America
Weirdo News — The shameless and hypocritical justices of the Supreme Court have lifted California’s ban on indoor Church services during the pandemic, ruling that California's strict orders appear to violate the Constitution’s protection of the free…
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Due To The Horrible Beaver Infestation Problem, Arkansas Will Allow High School Boys To Carry Handguns
LITTLE ROCK – (Satire News) – The principal at Glen Campbell High School informed the media that beavers have literally taken over the campus and the classrooms. Principal Billy Ray “Bubba” Lemoncake, 52, told local reporters that at first, there…
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Current political divides caused by chem trail snafu
Government officials have always assured us they have our best interests in mind. The chem trails we see in our skies, once thought to be a means for reprerssion, were actually meant to enhance our minds. But now we’re told by an NSA spokesman that s…
Read full storyLatest Spoof US Headlines
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CDC updates COVID-19 guidelines for glory holes
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TV programming revolution coming this fall! NBC making big comeback!
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Mr. Joe: The Hoarse Whisperer
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Andrew Giuliani deciding whether to run for office or go live in the jungle
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Traffic engineers slowing traffic flow with perpetual red lights
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President Biden missing: Thought to be inside the White House
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Pelosi Assumed Presidency While Biden, Harris Gone
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"GREETINGS EARTHLING" - Transcripts of alien conversations released by CIA and FBI
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Donald Trump Denies That He Is a Card-Carrying Member of The U.S. Nazi Federation
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Meghan and Harry to start their own country in California – President Biden was “supportive”
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What January 6th Insurrection?
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What’s up with Rudy Giuliani's head? Somebody please help!
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Traffic chaos caused by bicycle on K Street and 19th in central DC
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Lock Up Crooked Donald Trump
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Ted Cruz Says He Would Have Joined Military But “My Daughters Won’t Let Me”
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Rudy Giuliani wearing no pants is picked up by police in Central Park; says he "forgot"
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Rod Stewart beaten and jailed in London for writing "Tonight’s the Night" lyrics
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Will Jailing Donald Trump Make America Great Again?
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Don Jr's Ex says he's a hopeless bedwetter
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Mitch McConnell’s Birthday Gift To Donald J. Trump Will Surprise You
