Troubled Tucker Carlson: My kingdom for some candy!
Tucker "Carl" Karlson was seen panhandling on the streets of Houston Texas yesterday, sitting in his own filth, bowtie askew, mud (or something) smeared on his face. "Spare some change, pretty pleeeeeeease! I'll tell you some lies! I know 'em all.
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Polls show that 92% of all registered Republicans want Gov. Ron DeSantis over Donald Trump
Political polls reveal a significant decline in Donald J. Erasmus Trump's popularity following his conviction for sexual assault. Recent polls among GOP voters portray Trump's stature diminished to that of a mere answer on the game show "Jeopardy!…
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In an effort to sound more respectable, The Proud Boys terrorist organization is changing its name
Now that a significant number of members from the notorious US homegrown terrorist group, better known as the Proud Boys, have been sentenced to prison, the Grand Dragon himself, Horatio "Bubba" Katzenjammer, believes it's time for a rebranding of th…
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Moby Trump: The whaling misfortune of a flabby ex-president
Since he has been waiting for one of his many court dates, Trump has gained weight eating burgers, burritos, Melania’s and Ivanka’s famous hickory smoked tacos, and stuffing down more top-secret documents which the FBI never found. To try and lose…
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The United States Federation of Tenured Teachers unanimously agrees that Trump is evil
In a remarkable turn of events, the U.S. Federation of Tenured Teachers (USFTT), the largest teachers union in the nation, has unanimously declared D.J. Erasmus Trump as the "Supreme Villain" in the annals of educational history. With a resounding…
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Loud and proud, boys behind bars
Proud Boys and QAnon gun-toters have been well-and-truly bitchslapped by a judge, and they are now facing some serious time. However, a pressing question remains: even if these followers are incarcerated, will their ideologies persist? Will the re…
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89.8% of Fox News Viewers Are Thrilled That Tucker "The Traitor" Carlson Was FINALLY Fired!
South Carolina Outlaws Table Salt
Recusal As Epstein Goes Viral
The Nutcase Governor of Texas, Greg "Wheelchair Willie" Abbott Announces He Is Going To Run For President (Ah Make That Roll For President)
Trump The Evil Jerk Barely Escapes Being Kidnapped
A Wildfire Hits Alaska and Melts Over 4,000 Igloos
Donald Trump Has Become A Vampire According To Daughter Tiffany Trump
Trump Attorney recuses himself under Twenty Eighth Amendment – “When thou knowest that thy client is a complete scumbag”
Will the Real Donald Trump Please Stand Up & Eat More Cereal
Biden Crime Family Connected To McMuttleys Dogburger Franchises In North Korea
House Homeland Security committee members given rabies shots following Marjorie Taylor-Greene’s rabid outburst
Donald Trump Hit With a Restraining Order By Melania

Meet Trump's new attorney
It's widely known that Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump has a long history of refusing to pay his attorneys, with the exception of Michael "Hush Money" Cohen. Finding a reputable attorney willing to represent the self-proclaimed hooha grabber is near…
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Gov. Greg "Eggplant" Abbott has been arrested for reckless wheelchair driving
In a bizarre turn of events, Governor Greg "Wheelchair Willie" Abbott found himself in handcuffs after being charged with reckless driving while operating his wheelchair. The governor, bearing an uncanny resemblance to a rotten eggplant, attempted…
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Rachel Maddow sends MSNBC interns to site of mass shooting to put black face on victims
After the latest mass shooting in somewhere USA, where a deranged Caucasian gunman used an AR-15 to kill a Caucasian family of five, Rachel Maddow was hunkered over her desk at The Rachel Maddow Show, seething with anger, pulling her hair, and scream…
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The booted Tucker Carlson may be replaced by a woman who looks like a pimple with long blonde hair
Speculation is swirling at the Faux News network regarding the potential replacement for the controversial Tucker Carlson. A peculiar contender has emerged, once described as a woman bearing a striking resemblance to a blonde-haired pimple. Kaylei…
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Reports from the FBI are that the entire Trump family could possibly all end up in prison
The Trump family may soon be fronting a different kind of reality TV show as reports suggest their potential residence could shift from Mar-a-Lago to a federal prison. According to sources at The American Research Group, the FBI's investigations h…
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The FBI says that Trump has already been fitted for handcuffs
According to Andy Cohen, America's renowned information guru, an interesting revelation has surfaced about former president, the Trumpturd. It appears that DJT has already undergone a rather unique fitting process, this time involving handcuffs. C…
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Rainbow Refuses to Wear Pride Colors, Shows Up as a Dull Gray
After a thundershower in Topeka, Kansas left a gray rainbow in the sky, activists protested the weather and basic physics. "I can't imagine such insensitivity," stated one protester. "After all we've worked for, the unscientific engagement of sunl…
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President Biden proudly boasts that he subscribes to Victorian Secrets magazine
White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre was asked if it's true that POTUS has a subscription to the extremely popular monthly publication Victorian Secrets Magazine. Miss Jean-Pierre smiled and announced that President Biden has subscribed…
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Sarah Huckabee never let Trump touch her you-know-what
Since 2016, one of the Trumpturd's most cherished comrades has been Gov. Sarah Huckabee of Arkansas. During her tenure as DJT's press secretary/attack dog, she skillfully orchestrated the illusion that the Orange Whale possessed an unmatched intel…
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Trump's therapist says he cannot stop crying, seeks solace in fast food
Reports coming out of Mar-a-Lago suggest that Trump's guilt-ridden conscience has led him to seek therapy twice a day, attempting to atone for the myriad of controversial actions he has committed. According to an insider, Trump's fast-food habits…
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Stormy Daniels Has Informed The FBI That Trump Offered Her $20,000 To Say She Never Ate His Pickle
LOS ANGELES - (Spoof News) - In a shocking revelation, Stormy Daniels, the woman who was paid $130,000 hush money by former President Donald Trump, claims that Trump tried to bribe her with $20,000 to say that they never ate Minnesota pickles togethe…
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Since Fox News Fired Tucker "The Liar" Carlson Their Viewership Has Dropped By 89%
NEW YORK CITY - (Spoof News) - The cable news network Fox News has announced that it is revamping its entire programming to cater to a younger, hipper audience. The network, known for its conservative leaning programming and support for former Pr…
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Mickey Mouse called Florida Governor DeSantis a WHAT?
Mickey Mouse is in a tiff, and Olive Oil has a crate of tomatoes ready to throw at Florida Governor DeSantis. And if you think that's a threatening situation, wait until you see what Donald Duck and his nephews are ready to do. It's total pandemonium…
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Minnesota Has Become The Pickle Capital Of The World!
ST. PAUL, Minnesota - (Spoof News) - In a recent survey conducted by The Pickle Enthusiast magazine, Minnesota has been declared the "Pickle Capital of the World". The magazine's editor, Peter Piper, said that Minnesota's obsession with pickles ha…
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The Mexican cartels declare war on their rivals
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Jesus Comes Back, Gets Shot in Mass Shooting
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Donald "Dopey" Trump Says His Daddy, Don The Con, Wants Him To Run For President
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Stormy Daniels Puts A Restraining Order On Donald Trump The Pu*sy Grabber
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Is A US Supreme Court Justice On The Take?
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Idaho Bans Hip Hop Music
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Greg Abbot faces flat-tire frustration admist Texas Troubles
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The North Dakota state legislature is considering a name change
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The California Department of Tourism says 'Come visit California - the damn wildfire smoke is now up in Oregon'
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Joe Biden embraces Republicanism
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The LGBTQ community is happy with Disney
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The Reason Why Wyoming Will No Longer Hire Female Coal Miners
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Macy’s Day Chinese Parade
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Get That Little Lady Back Into That Kitchen
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Nervous Nellie, AKA Donald Trump, Is Now Smoking 7 Packs of Cigarettes a Day
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Oklahoma is allowing execution by space flight
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Abortion Karma Fiasco
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A Taliban terrorist spotted in a Tennessee fast food establishment
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Alabama unveils their new slogan - Come to Alabama and we'll give you a free bag of cotton
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Why did CNN give a convicted rapist one hour of air time?