Showing the very latest breaking spoof news snippets. You can use the calendar on the right to browse through the most recent breaking news snippets.

Senator Klobuchar and Judge Jeannine Pirro in Partisan Cat Fight

VP hopeful Klobuchar/Judge Jeannine are at it tooth-and-nail! Seems like they both want Mike "Pillow Guy" Lindell as their personal Boy-Toy. Amy claims home turf MN rights, but the Judge overruled it.

written by Trinculoman, 03 April 2020

CNN's Infected Chris Cuomo Has A Transforming Experience

The anchor gained a new perspective yesterday. By attempting to get rid of the coronavirus by jamming a gushing fire hose up his nose, he flushed out all that lefty-progressive sh*t from his brain.

written by Trinculoman, 03 April 2020

Harry And Meghan

Has Prince Harry become a stay-at-home father, while Meghan continues her Hollywood career?

written by K.C. Bell, 02 April 2020

Apple Insider

An insider told me that Apple computers are really PC's at their core.

written by Butch, 01 April 2020

Kitten

My students were mortified when I plugged a kitten into my computer, but they did the same with a mouse.

written by Butch, 01 April 2020

Zombie Comedian

The zombie comedian killed his audience with gutsy deadpan humor.

written by Butch, 01 April 2020

Tree Bank

They just set up a new bank in a tree. It was a small branch.

written by Butch, 01 April 2020

Lazy

My lazy friend was busted for hitch-hiking while j-walking. He was thumbing for piggy-backs.

written by Butch, 01 April 2020

Drink Windex

Drink Windex, it won't leave streaks.

written by Butch, 01 April 2020

Stop & Shop

I went to Stop and Shop yesterday and found 50 dollars. Yeah, I couldn't believe it. Just sitting there in the register.

written by Butch, 01 April 2020

Cheap!

You know you're cheap when you make change in wishing wells.

written by Butch, 01 April 2020

Doctors ask astronauts on the International Space Station to social distance themselves and go into self-isolation...

...Station is now orbiting Neptune.

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 26 March 2020

Study: COVID-19 Still a "Pretty Tight" Name

Recent polling shows general disapproval of the new corona virus outbreak, though, to many, the name itself does sound "pretty tight".

written by Larry Leibowitz, 25 March 2020

Social Distancing

My wife and I found the perfect way to social distance: Walk in graveyards. It puts six feet between you and everybody else, and it’s highly motivating.

written by Matt Birkenhauer, 24 March 2020

Wash your paws

Washing your paws is recommended by Dr Fucini for getting rid of COVID-19 at PETA's request.

written by mikewadestr, 18 March 2020

150-Foot High Border Wall Appears Overnight Across American/Mexican Border...

...Mexican President says they built it themselves because, "You Americanos can keep your Coronavirus to yourselves! Suddenly, the drug lords and murderers down here don't seem so bad!"

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 17 March 2020

People Misunderstand The Concept of 'Social Distancing' re. Coronavirus...

...you're supposed to STAND 6 feet away from someone, not DRIVE 6 feet away from somebody's bumper, you dumb tailgaters!

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 16 March 2020

Trump tests Negative After Taking Nasal Coronavirus Test...

...however, doctors instead found over 20 kilos of cocaine up there.

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 16 March 2020

Stores Around The World Report Consumers Are Hoarding Numerous Rolls Of Toilet Paper...

...prompting fears from farmers about a shortage of toilet paper crops.

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 14 March 2020

Trump Tests Positive For Covid-19 Denial...

...Symptoms include shutting eyes tightly, sticking fingers in ears, and going, "NA-NA-NA-NA-NA!!!"

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 13 March 2020

50-Year Old Canadian Music Awards Show, The Junos, Cancelled Because Of Coronavirus Fears...

...99 % of Canadians ask, "What are the Junos?"

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 12 March 2020

Coronavirus Health Tip of the Day

When leaving home, carry a small butane torch and several spare fuel cartridges. This way, when you need to open a door, you will be able to heat the handle to a dull red color before touching it.

written by Vlad D.M. Paylaw, 11 March 2020

Lizzie Warren Looks for Dough to Pay the Furies Tab

It's payday for Femi-Furies, whom Lizzie hired to stalk, harangue, and bedevil Bernie-Bros to the point of choking on their weed-breaths. She'll cash in 401Ks, funded from her "Capitalist Law" era.

written by Trinculoman, 06 March 2020

First Case Of Coronavirus For Family Pet Dog...

...World Health Organization warns Goldfish are next!

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 28 February 2020

While Visiting India, Trump Unable To Pronounce Certain Names And Words To Indian Leaders...

...specifically things like 'please', 'thank you', and 'Yes, I would like more salad!'

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 26 February 2020

Trump speaks out

In a terse tweet US President Donald J Trump has responded to claims of interference by Russian agents in the current election campaign as "steaming horseshit". No one believes him however.

written by whatinthe world, 25 February 2020

The Red Clusterfuck

(With apologies to W. C. Williams)

Too much depends
upon

some white hicks
in Iowa

with glazed
over eyes

besides the white
chickens.



written by Matt Birkenhauer, 16 February 2020

Trump Mistakenly Congratulates The Wrong U.S. State for World Series Win...

...then he does it again by congratulating MASH 4077th 'For their 2020 Oscar-winning Best Picture, the Korean-made 'Parasite'.

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 14 February 2020

Is that you Donald?

A man claiming to be Donald J Trump has walked into a bar in Dodge City and asked for directions to the nearest nudist colony. Mr Trump was wearing an Indian kaftan with sandals.

written by whatinthe world, 14 February 2020

Boris and his puzzle

UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson says that the hardest thing he has to do at number 10 Downing Street is complete his Buckingham Palace jigsaw puzzle. He claims that it takes about 50 hours to solve.

written by whatinthe world, 14 February 2020

Trump on another mission

US President Donald J Trump has announced he will make a sub orbital flight on board a Virgin space vehicle this summer."I'm doing it for Jesus" he proclaimed though nobody is prepared to believe him.

written by whatinthe world, 14 February 2020

Trump wins again!

The President of the United States, Donald Trump, was today awarded an Academy Award by the Hollywood institution that adjudicates on them each year. Trump thanked the NAACP and the John Birch Society

written by whatinthe world, 14 February 2020

"The Masked Altar Boy" Blows Away Vatican Ratings

No Catholics could be reached for a response, but Dillon from Glendale, Colorado went on record saying, "This "Masked" shit has gone too far."

written by Michael Sienicki, 11 February 2020

"The Masked Muslim" Blows Away Primetime Ratings

At press time, nobody was available for comment.

written by Michael Sienicki, 11 February 2020

Pagliacci found dead, by suicide

Pagliacci was found dead committing suicide on his hotel room. The family will take legal action against the doctor for medical negligence for denying medical attention for Pagliacci’s depression.

written by Mansa Musa, 09 February 2020

Vegas gives New Hampshire 5-4 odds of tallying their primary votes before Iowa

Las Vegas, the gambling capital of the US, has given New Hampshire 5-4 odds of tallying their votes before Iowa does.

written by mikewadestr, 07 February 2020

Pelosi's Spit Ball

Though Nancy Pelosi tore up Trump's silly speech, she could have reduced it to a series of spit-balls aiming them at Trump's nest!

written by K.C. Bell, 06 February 2020

Big Ben gets high on Brexit Bong

Tory MPs have promised marijuana-smoking clock tower Big Ben a puff of the good stuff to celebrate Britain’s departure from the EU at the end of this month through private members' donations.

written by Cleopatra Chaos, 18 January 2020

Black Face-Wearing Canadian Prime Minister Trudeau Now Wearing Black And White Face...

...by sporting silly-looking salt and pepper-coloured goatee.

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 15 January 2020

Czech Republic in flames

UK football fans of West Bromwich Albion FC have been so angered by a loss to a Czech Republic team that they have set fire to the entire western European country. This is phenomenal and amazing!!

written by whatinthe world, 23 December 2019

Missing pilot is a marathon hopeful

The last man home in the recent London to Brighton marathon was none other than the missing pilot of vanished Malaysian Airlines flight MH370. He impressed with his evasive sidestep and agile style.

written by whatinthe world, 23 December 2019

Missing pilot sighted

The pilot of missing Malaysian Airlines flight MH370 has been spotted sailing a twelve masted schooner around the Meditteranean island of Capris. Nobody else was on board as he cruised the azure seas

written by whatinthe world, 23 December 2019

Trump does it again!

US President Donald J Trump has appointed the missing Pilot from vanished Malaysian Airlines flight MH370 as the next head of NASA.The President wants to have the best person available for the job.

written by whatinthe world, 23 December 2019

Missing pilot doubles as TV celebrity

The pilot of Malaysian Airlines flight MH370 has suddenly appeared as a quiz master on a North Korean TV programme. He smiled confidently and was even cracking jokes about the missing flight. Oh God!

written by whatinthe world, 23 December 2019

Anglican priest in trouble

A learned Anglican priest has been charged with running guns to ISIS in Iraq. He justified his crime on the basis that he was "doing God's work". God definitely wasn't a terrorist as far as we know.

written by whatinthe world, 23 December 2019

Boris under the pump

British Prime Minister Boris Johnson has announced he will jump off Beachy Head and be buried if he can't deliver "Brexit" by the end of January 2020. Some people are quietly hoping he won't make it.

written by whatinthe world, 23 December 2019

We're all saying "Happy Impeachment" again, thanks to Trump

It was so bad for so long, nobody said it under Obama. But now Trump is here and doing his thing, we can all say "Happy Impeachment" again. What an amazing president!

written by Sir Geoffroy Cockface, 19 December 2019

Ebay Listing for XXL Wool Coat Goes Viral

An Ebay listing for a XXL Wool Coat went viral after the seller's humorous description and his recommendation that obese buyers buy it as incentive to lose weight and list it back on Ebay.

written by David E. Wesley, 24 November 2019

Also In Small Town News...

...hometown entrepreneur, Buford J. Blount of Yorbley Corners, is planning to sell his box of combs some time next year. Get in line early, folks! They're gonna to go fast!

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 23 November 2019

And In Small Town News...

...Agatha Morgenrukker is going to wash her dishes at 6:30 PM, instead of 6:15 PM. You go girl!

written by Stefano M. Stefano, 22 November 2019
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