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Paxton Quigley
Paxton Quigley
Joined: 02 June 2012
Stories Written: 61

Seven day catch up

Check out anything you've missed with the archive:

Elmo feeling sad, says Elmo

Funny story: Elmo feeling sad, says Elmo

Lovable red Muppet, Elmo is sad because Elmo has been told to stop talking in the third person. Elmo doesn't understand this, as Elmo is only a young Muppet, although he has been on the show for years, and knows things about life that even Happy M...

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"Woody Woodpecker" Goes Straight to DVD, Shockingly

Funny story: "Woody Woodpecker" Goes Straight to DVD, Shockingly

Recently, film buffs were taken with surprise to see DVD ads for the 2017 film Woody Woodpecker. It is quite clear from the preview that we are dealing with a cinematic masterpiece. The film delivers a powerful environmental message as the titular bi...

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Xenomorph rejected from another job, again

Funny story: Xenomorph rejected from another job, again

Diane Smith, a Xenomorph, best known for a fleeting appearance in the Alien: Resolution film has spoken about being rejected for another job. The eight foot tall alien, who bleeds acid, and has an unfortunate habit of incubating her offspring with...

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Ken Dodd Wasn't Half Funny!

Funny story: Ken Dodd Wasn't Half Funny!

Ken Dodd, the comedian, who died earlier this week aged 90, has today been remembered by those who saw his act during his many years in showbusiness. Dodd, or 'Doddy' as he was affectionately known, hailed from the Knotty Ash area of Liverpool, an...

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Lady Godiva reappears in Miami nightclub on horse, bareback!

Funny story: Lady Godiva reappears in Miami nightclub on horse, bareback!

Shocked nightclub visitors could not believe their eyes as a horse appeared in their midst carrying a thinly clad nymph, bareback! In fact, punters were so stoned, or canned, after downing buckets of champers and purple pills, they thought it was a h...

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'From Russia with love' to be re-filmed and renamed 'From Putin to May with Poisonous Arrows!'

Funny story: 'From Russia with love' to be re-filmed and renamed 'From Putin to May with Poisonous Arrows!'

James Bond is being reanimated after breathing heavily and nearly dying as the ancient MI5 spy failed miserably to lock millions into the cinema, but the latest Russian attack on the UK has given Bond makers food for thought! Cameras have already...

Read full storyView ''From Russia with love' to be re-filmed and renamed 'From Putin to May with Poisonous Arrows!''

Parisian porno downs tools because of Sex-Doll brothel!

Funny story: Parisian porno downs tools because of Sex-Doll brothel!

A Parisian sex doll brothel is causing an outrage in the dark world of "Tossers United" because Parisian porno stars are refusing to perform unless their plastic competitors are removed from the seedy sex underground world in the 'city of love!'...

Read full storyView 'Parisian porno downs tools because of Sex-Doll brothel!'

Good Poet turns up for Poetry open mike night

Funny story: Good Poet turns up for Poetry open mike night

There was consternation in Chutney on the Fritz when a fairly decent writer, who doesn't bang on about his poetry on social media turned up for the Words Matter poetry night in the King's Bottom on Wednesday night. Deirdre Rhyming Couplet from the...

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