Internet Biscuit Scam Shock

Funny story written by Joel Kaye

Thursday, 12 August 2021

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Outraged Welsh biscuit lover Dai Jestif claims big business is stealing millions through internet biscuit scams.

“It was only when the computer started malfunctioning that it occurred to me. You see, every time you go to a site it asks you to accept cookies. Well, I don’t mind them using that American word, if they have to, so I always used to ‘accept’, and thought nothing of it, but then the computer started malfunctioning, so I took it to Evans the hardware, and I said, ‘Do you think it’s the cookies?’. ‘No,’ he said, but I persisted. I said, ‘What if I took the back off and shook it a bit? The crumbs – do you think it’s full of crumbs from all those ‘cookies’, as they call them?’ Oh, he just looked at me. But they’re funny like that in Blaenau. So, I departed.

Mr Jestif insisted, “There is something funny going on. I have written to them all, and never even received a civil reply, let alone a biscuit! I was thinking of writing to Dame Shirley Bassey. I’m sure she’s partial to a bit of welsh cake after she’s done one of her James Bond songs. Or Sir Tom Jones. He’d know what to do. He goes over big in Las Vegas.”

At this point Mr Jestif became pensive. “Perhaps I should have made a concession! Perhaps I should have written, ‘I’ve not received any ‘cookies’, instead of calling them biscuits. You see, that’s the problem – language. Oh yes. That’s the problem!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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