There were 232 spoof news stories published in January 2022. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Russia, China, and Cambodia Agree To Form a NATO-Like Pact To Be Called, “Two Big Ass Major World Powers and One Little Bitty Insignificant One”
MOSCOW – (World Satire) – The Kremlin has just announced that two of the world’s major powers have agreed to form a three-nation pact with a smaller, insignificant power. When asked why in the world the great powerful countries of Russia and China…
Read full storyThe British Band The Camel Toe Named The Best New Heavy Metal Band In The United Kingdom
LONDON - ( UK Satire) – The Brit Music Scene Magazine has just named The Best Heavy Metal Band of The Year. This year’s winner is Camel Toe, and the five lads that hail from Wimbledon beat out a field of 90 bands, including such popular bands as L…
Read full storyAn Increasingly Decrepit God To Be Fitted with an Omniscient Aid
“Wha—Where are my glasses? A tsunami in Tonga? Where the fuck’s ‘Tonga’? Russian forces massing on Ukraine’s border? What the hell?” These are only some of the many questions the caretakers of an increasingly senescent Supreme Being have overhea…
Read full storyThe Huge Meteor That Was Heading For Duck Dung, Alabama Is Now Going To Land In Dodge City, Kansas
CHICAGO – (Satire News) – Weather experts are now stating that the gigantic meteor which was scheduled to hit Alabama in March will not hit the cotton-pickin’ state after all. Weather expert, and collector of foreign adult toys, Toby Prixsteen, ha…
Read full storyNazi Man (to be sung to the melody of "Spider Man")
Nazi Man, Nazi Man, Does whatever a Nazi can. Spins his lies, any size, Attracts more Nazis, just like flies. Look Out! Here comes the Nazi Man. Is he wrong? Listen bud, He's got White Supremacist blood. Can he swing from a thread? Take…
Read full storyThe Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Who Was Fired For Being Pregnant Is Awarded A Huge Monetary Settlement
DALLAS – (Sports Satire) – In a story that clearly shows that if you bide your time, you will eventually be rewarded; and rewarded handsomely. iNews reporter, Kitty Segovia, reported in November of 2020, that veteran cheerleader Millicent Tumblewo…
Read full storyIreland Chased The Russian Navy Away
Who would have thought? It started when Russia announced it was going to perform naval exercises off the coast of Ireland without Ireland’s permission. Furthermore, Russia added, Ireland should stay out of its way. What? Naval exercises off the c…
Read full storyThe World’s Best Vagina Tightening Cream Is Now Available At Walgreens and CVS
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – The makers of the best pubic region tightening cream on the market are thrilled to say that it is now finally available in local pharmacies. Dr. Petrov P. Vinalabinio, of Greenland, who invented the cream, which is…
Read full storyA National Tampon Company Warns Its Users That Some Could Explode When They Come In Contact With Sperm
CHICAGO – (Satire News) – BuzzFuzz has just reported that the Hooha Tampon Company, headquartered in Beaver Falls, Pennsylvania, has just issued a very important warning that needs to be heeded by any and all females who use their tampons. Company…
Read full storyA List of 10 Celebrity New Year’s Resolutions For 2022
A LIST OF 10 CELEBRITY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS FOR 2022 - TAYLOR SWIFT – She wants to get at least three new boyfriends by Valentine's Day, so she can break up with them, and write her first three hit songs of the year. - DONALD TRUMP – Vows to…
Read full storyTrump For Prison In 2024
CHICAGO – (Satire News) – A group calling itself The Windy City Citizens To Make Sure Trump Ends Up In Prison In 2024 (TWCCTMSTEUIPI-2024) has informed the national news media that they plan to raise $75.3 million within three weeks. A spokesperso…
Read full storyThe Crayola Crayon Company To Add A Brand New Color In Honor of Donald Trump
FORK-IN-THE-ROAD, Pennsylvania – (Satire News) – The Crayola Crayon Company, formerly Binney & Smith has just informed the news media that they are adding a new crayon color in honor of Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump. The crayon company stated…
Read full storyTickets To The NFL Game Between The Dallas Cowboys and The Green Bay Packers at London’s Wembley Stadium Are All Sold Out!
LONDON – (UK Sports Satire) – Tickety Boo News reports “They’re All Gone!” referring to the hottest sports tickets in town. TBN writer Brompton Boxgrove informed the British citizens that all 89,903 tickets were sold within 37 minutes of being put…
Read full storyA Saudi Arabian Prince Proposes To LPGA Beauty Paige Spiranac
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – One of the most beautiful female athletes in the history of female athletes has just received a stunning marriage proposal. BuzzFuzz (Saudi Arabian Division) has just stated that filthy-rich Prince Trubeer Alleman…
Read full storyUS Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene Denies That She Has Inverted Nipples
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene, who many say is the most hated female politician in D.C., called up Margarita Mixx, the senior writer for the Wild Whispers News Agency. It seems that MTG wants WWNA to print…
Read full storyRacial Diversity Column
As part of our new attempts at diversity, here is an excerpt from “Things That Piss Me Off About White People,” the bestselling book by Rubbin’ D. Angelo, an academian who has been leading racial diversity seminars for the past thirty years. Most…
Read full storyR-Rated Tweets From Republicans - January, 2022
The Vox Populi News Agency has just compiled a list of some tweets that were recently sent out by members of the Republican party. The tweets were compiled by Vox Populi senior writer Tapioca Swizzle. TWEETS FROM REPUBLICANS TWEET #1: DONALD TR…
Read full storyThe Trojan Horse Condom Company Is Now Marketing Tiny Condoms For Males With Micro-Penises
CHICAGO – (Satire News) – The nation’s leading prophylactic (condom) manufacturer has just announced a new condom that it has just put out on the market. The condom is extremely tiny and Trojan Horse representative Peter P. Pillowitz, 52, said tha…
Read full storyFunny and original woman claims Chocolate Orange is one of her five a day
As people across the country are starting their new year diets, one woman has found a hilarious and original way to eat chocolate and stick to her diet by posting on Fakebook 'Look everyone, having my five a day, LOL' accompanied by a photo of a half…
Read full storyNorway Is Extremely Concerned About The Sardine Shortage
OSLO, Norway – (World Satire) – The government of Norway is very worried about the sardine shortage that has hit the Scandinavian country. Concern over the oily forage fish situation has all Norwegians worried-as-hell. The term sardine is also…
Read full storyDonald Trump Is Writing a Science Fiction Novel
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida – (Satire News) – GOPicky Magazine has just broken the story that Donald Trump is writing a science fiction novel. A Mar-a-Lago insider, told GOPicky senior writer Amos Soursuckle that DJT is on page 4 of his 339-page book.
Read full storyThe Ladies Professional Golfers Association’s First Transgender Player Easily Wins Her Very First Tournament
AUSTIN, Texas – (Sports Satire) – The Turnstile Review has broken the story on the very first transgender golfer to play in the LPGA. Buckaroo Kazoo with TS spoke with the gorgeously sexy Margie Musketelli, 27, who easily won the Austin 16 Ladies…
Read full storyWho Does Russia Think It Is?
Get real, Russia! Who do you think you are, China? Not only is Putin almost a head shorter, (5ft. 5in. with lifts) then Biden (6ft. without shoes) but Russia is smaller than North America. You shrimp! While everyone loves piroshki and borscht,…
Read full storyOne last swallow at Wembley Stadium
LONDON, (Rooters) - A yankee woman, Maria O'Sullivan, pissed off a Londoner named Jack Cromwell, better known to his friends as the "Ripper," during a goal scored inside Wembley Stadium at the start of his country's World Cup qualifying game against…
Read full storyCalifornia To Ban Everything Made Of Plastic
The State of California is planning on banning all plastic products. Yes, soon, in California, there will be no plastic allowed: no more soda bottles, water bottles, baby bottles, shampoo bottles, pill bottles, plastic silverware, food containers, su…
Read full storyBetty White Left Most of Her $75 Million To Her Pet Cockatoo “Cocky”
LOS ANGELES – (Satire News) – One of the most beloved comedian/actresses of all time has gone to that great television studio in the sky. The “First Lady of Television," Betty White passed away days short of her 100th birthday. According to LaL…
Read full storyThe FBI Raided Mar-a-Lago And Found 19 Gold Bars That Were Stolen From Fort Knox
MAR-a-LAGO – (Satire News) – Reports coming from The Daily Dirt News Agency state that a dozen agents from the FBI conducted a pre-dawn raid on Trump’s Dixieland mansion, Mar-a-Lago. The Federal officers confiscated over 27 computers, lap tops, iP…
Read full storyCouple arguing over the last twiglet
Gary and Lorraine Johnson have spent the last hour arguing over the last Twiglet. ‘I love Twiglets’ said Gary ‘but I hate Marmite, so if I want the taste of Marmite without the texture, I go for a Twiglet, but there was only one left, so I asked L…
Read full storyMcDonalds Introduces Their New McFortune Cookie-Flavored McNuggets
CICERO, Illinois – (Business Satire) – The Mickey D’s fast food chain is always looking out for brand new menu items to add to it’s huge assortment of “Mc” foods. A spokesperson for the biggest fast food chain in the entire world stated that their…
Read full storyGoodbye 2021 And No Thanks For The Memories
The best thing about 2021? Donald Trump is out of the White House. The worst thing about 2021? Donald Trump nearly succeeded in destroying U.S. Democracy. He came close. He and his cronies worked their collective tails off with desperate back…
Read full storyAlabama Outlaws Gay & Lesbian Parades
MONTGOMERY, Alabama – (Satire News) – The extremely homophobic state of Alabama has just passed a law that will prohibit any homosexualized group, organization, or entity from having a parade within the city limits of any town or city in the state.
Read full storyKamala Harris Demoted to T-Ball Journalism League
With Harris’ latest effort to rehabilitate her political batting average widely seen as a dramatic failure, her dwindling team of strategists have decided to move on from the “softball” interview format to the T-ball interview format. For those who…
Read full storyDonald Trump’s Designer MAGA Toupee Flops – Only 17 Sold Nation-Wide
DETROIT – (Satire News) – The manufacturer of the Donald Trump Designer MAGA Toupee is extremely disappointed as the Trumptard’s wig is a great big flop. The company that produced the wig, called Wigs-Be-Us, from Detroit stated that the orange-col…
Read full storySwitizerland’s Second Attempt At Launching a Moon Rocket Fails
WOODEN CLOG, Switizeland – (Satire News) – The Swiss government has just announced that their unmanned moon rocket, Tulip 2, has ended in utter failure. A spokesperson for the Swiss Moon Federation, Lila F. Shawcolot, stated that the Tulip 2 left…
Read full storyAaron Rodgers insists Fauci join other receivers in deal with Denver Broncos
With rumors of QB Aaron Rodgers leaving the Green Bay Packers, Mr. Fauci has once again made an appearance. Aaron Rodgers is insisting that he will not go to another team, such as the Denver Broncos, without trusted receivers at his side. These…
Read full storyA Hot, Sexy, 2nd Grade Teacher Has The Most Beautiful Pussy In Louisiana
LAKE CHARLES, Louisiana – (Satire News) – Boom Boom News has just broken the story that a 26-year-old 2nd grade teacher from Lake Charles, has just had the honor of having her vagina named The Most Beautiful Pussy in Louisiana. The blonde blue-eye…
Read full storyMother, 31, reveals 7p-a-day meal plans for struggling parents who can't afford to feed their children
A kind-hearted mother is battling the cost of living crisis by writing meal plans so struggling parents can feed a family of four for less than 28 pence a day - so they don't have to feel like they are 'poor'. Elizabeth Taylor (no relation), from…
Read full storyThe Manchester United Cheerleaders Will Pattern Themselves After The Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders
MANCHESTER, England – (UK Satire) – Like the old saying goes “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery,” the Glazer family, who owns the Manchester United Red Devils, have decided to take a cue from Jerry Jones, the owner of the Dallas Cowboys.
Read full storyMillions of Canadians Say That They Do Not Want Covid Shots and No One Is Going To Make Them Get Them
QUEBEC, Canada – (Satire News) – The Canadian government has just issued a memo stating that Canada has more unvaccinated people than any country in the world. A Quinnipinni poll showed that 98.7% of all residents are not vaxed. The poll showed th…
Read full storyJoe Biden Begins To Hammer Trump
Well, it's about time. Trump has been spewing lies forever. Most recently, on the escalator ride down, followed by his Mexican tirade. Then, no one can forget the bone spur shenanigans. All lies. Too many to list. But the most recent: The 2020 electi…
Read full storyHow did you see in the new year? by Mr Raymond Ving
Well hello there, How did you see in 2022? Were you at a party with some colleagues from Number 10? Were you busy throwing pieces of Coal into your neighbour’s gardens, like they do in Scotland? Or like a few people, did you go to bed at 10? Ha…
Read full storyDr. Fauci Addresses The Latest, Crazy Omicron Rumors
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Dr. Anthony Fauci has said that he is really getting irritated with the dozens and dozens of falsehoods that are being spread about the latest Coronavirus variant. He noted that the Omicron Virus, is believed to…
Read full storyWalter Muesli’s Guide to Acting part 1
Well Hello there, I am Walter Muesli, a famed actor from the 1970s with a still flourishing career. I was most recently in an episode of Midsummer Murders. I had a scene with Neil Dudgeon. A great chap brings so much pathos to the role of Bar…
Read full storyCalifornia To Change Death Valley’s Name
SACRAMENTO, California – (Satire News) – The state of California has decided, after receiving tons and tons of requests, to finally change the name of Death Valley. The California State Department of Naming, has commented that the desert which is…
Read full storyThe Detroit Lions Are Thinking About Moving To Calgary, Canada
DETROIT - (Sports Satire) – Two NFL teams are tied for the worst won-loss record in the NFL. Sports Bet Gazette senior writer Zorro La Bamba stated that the two teams were the Jacksonville Jaguars and the Detroit Lions, who had abysmally identical…
Read full storyBezos-Musk, Inc. To Build A Huge Factory In Liverpool, England
LIVERPOOL, England - (Satire News) – England is thrilled to announce that the largest corporation in the world has just agreed to build a huge factory in Liverpool, England. True Dat News Agency reporter Reggie Rickenbacker, informed the UK public…
Read full storyKim Jong-un Wants Everyone To Know That He Did Not Boink Marjorie Taylor Greene – Ever! Ever!
PYONGYANG, North Korea – (World Satire) – Reports from the Rice Paddy News Agency of North Korea state that President Kim Jong-un is angrier than a high school cheerleader with a case of the runs. Close aides say that the North Korea dictator is t…
Read full storyDetroit Says 2023 Automobiles Will Not Have Ignition Keys
DETROIT – (Satire News) – The American Auto Industry has just announced a huge change for the 2023 automotive season. A spokesperson for Ford Motors said that they have devised a new automobile ignition system that will not require a key. Ford…
Read full storyThe NFL’s First Transgender Cheerleader To Get Her Own TV Reality Show
HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News)- Tampa Bay Buccaneers cheerleader Gayle Wunderlust has just signed a contract to star in her very own reality show. Savannah Stiletto with The Daily Max interviewed Miss Wanderlust and asked if she will still be an NFL ch…
Read full storyTrump’s Brain Doctor Is Very Concerned Because His Brain Is Rapidly Dwindling Down To Nothing
SAN FRANCISCO – (Satire News) – Donald Trump’s neurological doctor has just told him what Melania has suspected for years. And that is that his brain, which is down to the size of a Georgia grape, is atrophying at an alarming rate. Dr. Simon P.
Read full storyThe NFL Is Moving The Super Bowl From California To Texas
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – Sports Balls Illustrated Magazine has just stated that Super Bowl LVI (51), which was supposed to have taken place at SoFi Stadium in Los Angeles is being moved. SBIM writer Dottie Bazooka says that the game will…
Read full storyQueen Elizabeth Has Just Purchased a £2.8 Million Portrait of The Beatles
LONDON – (UK Satire) – Ominium Gatherum (UK) has just reported that Queen Elizabeth attended a very prestigious art gallery acution, where she purchased a very rare photo of the Beatles dressed as Buckingham Palace guards. The auction took place i…
Read full storyTexas Governor Abbott Reveals How He Was Able To Eradicate The Damn Lady Bug Infestation
AUSTIN – (Satire News) – Back around Christmas time, the Lone Star state of Texas was hit with the worst lady bug infestation since the fall of 1849. This horrific insect invasion, was dubbed by Tittle Tattle Tonight senior writer Pico de Gallo, a…
Read full storyVice-President Kamala Harris Signs An $8 Million Contract With Converse Tennis Shoes
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – One thing about being a US president or vice-president are the nice little monetary perks that come with the office. For example, President Abraham Lincoln sold the rights to his name to the Lincoln Logs Toy Comp…
Read full storyFederal Agents Find 3-Life-Size Inflatable Sex Dolls In Trump’s Master Bedroom Closet
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida – (Satire News) – The Trumptard is insisting that the 3 life-size inflatable dolls that Federal agents found in his master bedroom closet are not his. At first, he told the agents that he had never seen them before. He then cha…
Read full storyThe World’s Greatest Bullfighter "El Gazpacho" Is Gored In Tijuana, Mexico
TIJUANA, Mexico – (Sports Satire) – Mexico’s News Agency El Ole, has just reported that the great Joaquin Beauregard Gazpacho, who is known as “El Gazpacho” was gored in Tijuana’s famed Mrs. Pancho Villa Bullring. The native of Madrid, Spain, was…
Read full storyTexas Governor Greg Abbott To Be Forcibly Removed From Office
AUSTIN – (Satire News) – The good, law abiding citizens of the Lone Star state have finally had their fill of the the worst, most worthless, piece-of-shit governor in the history of US governors. Greg “Eggplant Face” Abbott is hated more than hoof…
Read full storyManchester United Manager Withdraws Transfer Offer for Jesse Lingard After Learning He’s Already on Team
Manchester - Mauricio Pochettino, who recently joined Manchester United as manager, has been forced to reverse his first decision as the head man at the club, which was to buy attacking midfielder Jesse Lingard from West Ham United. Pochettino, wh…
Read full storyLondon's Tower Big Ben Damaged By Vandals
LONDON - (UK Satire) - Scotland Yard has just informed the British press that overnight some asshole vandals broke into the Tower Big Ben and caused extensive damage to the walls, the floor, the ceiling, and to a Keurig tea maker. An eyewitness, w…
Read full storySarah Ferguson Denies That She Is Cheating On Boyfriend Piers Morgan
LONDON – (UK Satire) – Sarah Ferguson recently told a very close friend that she has never been happier than she is now, and she confesses that she owes it all to her new boyfriend Piers Morgan. The 62-year-old Duchess of York, says that when she…
Read full storyTexas Is Changing Its Official State Beer
AUSTIN – (Satire News) – The Lone Star state is noted for Longhorn cattle, oil, rattlesnakes, huge ranches, the Chupacabra, and the sensuously sexy Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders. BuzzFuzz reporter Taffeta Kixx, noted that that the state is also noted…
Read full storyFamous Sayings Updated For Our Modern Times
(Original saying) I think, therefore I am. ( Updated saying) I stink, therefore I am pretty sure I still exist. That which does not kill us makes us stronger. That which does not kill us makes us really careful to avoid it the next time.
Read full storyThe New York City Rockettes Are Laying Off Half of The Dancers
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – In a move that at first was being blamed solely on the dreaded Trumpapalooza Virus, the most famous dance group in the world will be laying off 50% of their dancers. A spokesperson for the New York City Rockettes, R…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Says That in An Effort To Become More likable She’s Decided to Have Breast Augmentation Surgery
DENVER, Colorado – (Satire News) – The Hullabaloo News Agency has just broken the story that Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene, has secretly snuck into the Rocky Mountain high city. HNA executive writer Abel Zorro stated that he was informed by…
Read full storyQueen Elizabeth Has Been Released From The Hospital And Is Back At Buckingham Palace
BUCKINGHAM PALACE - (UK Satire) – Reports coming out of Buckingham Palace state that her majesty, Queen Elizabeth, has been released from the hospital, and is now resting comfortably at Buck House, as irreverent British comedian Ricky Gervais calls i…
Read full storyThe United States, Russia, and Cambodia Are Sending Troops To Ukraine
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – President Biden has just informed the American people that he will be sending 125,000 troops to Ukraine to counter Russia sending 100,000 troops to the Ukraine. POTUS has made it clear that he will not engage Put…
Read full storyGod Suffers with Mental Health; Becomes Atheist
Vatican - On Wednesday Pope Francis made a shocking statement of God's mental health. "I just don't believe in myself anymore." God is rumored to have said to his therapist. In addition to his recent self doubt God has been suffering with an…
Read full storyTom Brady and Aaron Rodgers, Two of The NFL’s Greatest Quarterbacks Are Both Heading For The Retirement Home
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – Two of the best future Hall of Fame quarterbacks appear to have come to the end of their pigskin passing careers. Tom Brady with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Aaron Rodgers with the Green Bay Packers both saw their…
Read full storyThe Sexy, Big-Breasted Elizabeth Hurley Has The Greatest Promotional Agent In The Entire World – Herself
HEREFORDSHIRE, England – (UK News) – It is no secret that the erotically sultry actress Elizabeth Hurley certainly has the number one, best personal agent in the entire movie business. Hurley does a fantastically phenomenal job of keeping herself…
Read full storyTed Cruz Says Daughters Tricked Him Into Saying That January 6th Was a Violent Terrorist Insurrection
Washington - After he was lambasted by right wing commentator Tucker Carlson on Fox News for correctly pointing out that the January 6th violent right wing insurrection, fomented by President Trump to stop the vote count in Congress, was carried out…
Read full storyThe FBI Is Now Investigating Donald Trump For Allegedly Trying To Coerce McDonalds into Giving Him Free Big Macs For a Whole Year
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The Federal Buerau of Investigation is now looking into the allegations that the Trumptard (aka Donald Trump) tried to get favors from a private business entitiy. Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump, whose attorney fee…
Read full storyNow That Tom Brady Has Retired, CBS, NBC, Fox Sports, and ESPN Are All Fighting To Hire Him As An NFL Analyst
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – Now that the future hall of fame quarterback Tom Brady has retired, his analyst services are going to be in great demand. Sporting Chance Magazine’s Tango Brisket reports that the big four sports networks are sali…
Read full storyArizona Border Patrol Agents Discover The Longest Drug Cartel Tunnel In The History of Tunnels
RATTLESNAKE PEE, Arizona – (Satire News) – Boom Boom News has just broken the story that US Border Patrol agents have just discovered the longest tunnel ever constructed between the United States and Mexico. American tunnel expert Jose Juan Cabeza…
Read full storyA Former Comedian, Volodymyr Zelensky Gives Hilarious Press Conference
Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelensky gave a rare appearance in the U.S. as a way of gathering support for his country’s plight, as the country is likely to be invaded at any minute by Russian troops. Given Zelensky’s background, it is perhaps not sur…
Read full storyNew legislative controls sought over Governor Newsom's obsession with outer stratosphere emissions
The California governor's concentration on restricting such gasoline-driven devices as leaf blowers to being electricity driven, plus moving on with replacing fossil fuel vehicles with electric, has led on to extensive investigation by the press.
Read full storyBarron Trump Is Growing Like a Freakin’ Weed And Could Reach 7-Feet Tall By The Time He Turns 18
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida – (Satire News) – Barron Trump’s pediatrician recently told the news media that the 15-year-old former first kid has shot up and is now an amazing 6-feet-7-inches tall! He added that at this rate Melania's son could end up bein…
Read full storyRussia Conquers Ukraine After Putin Asks Trump to Send His Cult Followers to Invade Kiev
Kiev, Ukraine - Russian President Vladimir Putin has taken over the government of the Ukraine without losing any troops, after flying hundreds of Donald Trump's crazed cult followers to Kiev disguised as peace loving U.S. tourists. Once inside the…
Read full storyA Top NASA Official Reveals That Dumbass Trump Wanted To Send A Land Rover To The Sun!
HOUSTON – (Satire News) – Just when everyone thinks that nothing else stupid-as-shit, could come out about old “Toddler Fingers” (DJT), the racist, perverted pussy-grabber shocks the nation. A high-ranking NASA official, who did not want his name…
Read full storyWhole Foods To Be Renamed 'MILF Central'
Bezos is said to have had another epiphany on one of his late night rocket rides to the edge of space: Why not just rename his Whole Foods stores for what they are best known for, the hottie MILFs in almost every isle. A survey showed that pretty…
Read full storyDonald Trump Says If He Wants To Move To England, He Will, No Matter What Queen Elizabeth Says
LONDON – (UK Satire) – London's Ta Ta For Now News reports that the twice-impeached, one-term pathological liar (aka Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump) is so extremely butt-hurt at the fact that her majesty the queen stated on-the-record, that he is not…
Read full storyRussian President Vladimir Putin Denies That He Had An Affair With Melania Trump
MOSCOW – (World Satire) – The Kremlin Voice has finally decided to issue a statement regarding President Putin's alleged affair with Melania Trump. The KV stated emphatically in an editorial that the rampant rumors that have been floating all over…
Read full storyThe Amazing Female Baltimore Bowler Has Now Bowled a Perfect 300 Game Using a Billiard Ball
BALTIMORE – (Sports Satire) – Back in September of 2021, Lila P. Festivus, bowled a perfect 300 game using a standard bowling ball. Well now the 27-year-old sexy brunette has bowled another perfect 300 game, but this time using a standard regulati…
Read full storyRenowned Scientists And Fabulous Hairdressers Reveal The Truth; The Man-Bun Is Deadly!
Scientist from the U.S., Europe, and Oakville, Ontario, Canada have joined forces with their hairdressing counterparts to warn the world at large that the scourge of the 21st century, the dopey-looking, douchie hairstyle known as 'The Man-Bun' is not…
Read full storyTom Brady Decides To Hang Up His Cleats After 22 NFL Seasons
TAMPA BAY, Florida – (Sports Satire) – The Sports Bet Gazette has broken the story that a man who is arguably the greatest quarterback in the history of the NFL is hanging up his cleats, his helmet, and his jock strap. Zorro La Bamba spoke with To…
Read full storyThe Russian KGB Has Discovered 273 Alaskan Eskimos Illegally Living in Port Comrade, Russia
MOSCOW – (Satire News) – The Kremlin has issued a statement that Russia’s KGB found 273 Eskimos from Alaska living in the Chukchi Sea town of Port Comrade. The agents said that the Eskimos appeared to be in fairly good spirits, except for 13 of th…
Read full storyPrince Charles Accidentally Admits That Camilla Parker Bowles Has An Intimate Tattoo
LONDON – (UK Satire) – The Prince of Wales, Prince Charles recently spoke with Piers Morgan, and he accidentally let it slip that his wife, The Duchess of Cornwall (Camilla Parker Bowles) has an intimate tattoo. Charlie, as Mick Jagger calls him,…
Read full storyPresident Biden Says That Trump Had The Unmitigated Audacity To Ask Him If He Can Serve Out His Prison Time At Mar-a-Lago
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – It appears that the Trumptard has finally come to the realistic realization that his days as a “Free Person” are numbered. BuzzFuzz reports that a Mar-a-Lago insider stated that Melania’s soon-to-be-ex-husband is…
Read full storyHistorians Discover The Ancient World’s First Circumcised Statue
ATHENS, Greece – (World Satire) – A group of historians and archaeologists have just made an astounding discovery. The group of 9 who all hail from different towns in Greenland, discovered a statue of a male believed to be in his early 50’s, stand…
Read full storyThe Damn Good Reason Why Dubai’s Annual Camel Races Have Been Cancelled
DUBAI, India – (Satire News) – The yearly Dubai Camel Races have been cancelled due to the fact that four of the camels tested positive for hump enhancing drugs. A spokesperson for the racing association noted that the camels appeared to look fine…
Read full storyFedEx Has Now Resorted To Using Robot Drivers
MEMPHIS, Tennessee – (Satire News) – FedEx, the transportation giant has just announced that it has finally perfected the art of using electronic robot drivers to deliver their customers' products. A FedEx rep said that the company had been workin…
Read full storyKim Kardashian is Finally Having All of Her Kanye West Tattoos Removed
LOS ANGELES – (Satire News) – Kim Kardashian commented to Scandal Today reporter Cheyenne Patio that she has finally decided to get rid of her four Kanye West tattoos. Kim told Miss Patio that now that she is dating "Saturday Night Live" star Pete…
Read full storyA Female Boston Bookeeper Has Been Hired By Afghanistan's Taliban Government
KABUL, Afghanistan – (US Satire) – The new president of Afghanistan, Abu Taboo Fashu, is extremely thrilled, and proud that he has finally managed to find a reputable bookkeeper to do the books of the new Taliban government. The official Aghani ne…
Read full storyGuatemala Reveals The Nation’s Most Nortorious Drug Cartel Hitwoman
GUATEMALA CITY, Guatemala – (Satire News) – Guatemala’s El Platano News Agency has just revealed that one of the country’s most notorious hitmen is actually a hitwoman. El Plat reporter Paloma Bocalinda, actually spoke with the woman in question i…
Read full storyQueen Elizabeth Has Just Paid £1 Million For A Kentucky Thoroughbred Racehorse
LONDON – (UK Satire) – Word coming out of Buckingham Palace is that her majesty Queen Elizbeth has just purchased a thoroughbred racehorse from Kentucky. The horse named "Princess iPad" is 2-years-old, and has won 4 of the 5 races she has entered.
Read full storyFlorida Outlaws Sexual Intercourse in The Back Seat of A Car
TALLAHASSEE, Florida – (Satire News) – The Florida state legislature has just passed Resolution Bill #17-4169 SI, which states that it is now strictly forbidden for a couple to engage in sexual intercourse in the back of a vehicle, namely a car, a tr…
Read full storySuper Bowl Hot Dog Vendors Predict They’ll Sell Over 3 million Hot Dogs At Super Bowl LV1 (56)
INGLEWOD, California – (Sports Satire) – The Happy Hot Dogs Company, which will be providing all of the hot dogs to this year’s Super Bowl 56, has stated that they will break their Super Bowl hot dog selling record once again. The football class…
Read full storySimon Cowell Reveals That His Friend Piers Morgan Is Totally Smitten With Sarah Ferguson
LONDON – (UK Satire) – BuzzFuzz (UK) has just announced that Simon Cowell stated that his best friend Piers Morgan, revealed to him that he and Sarah Ferguson, aka The Duchess of York, are really having a really, jolly, old, spiffy, good time dating…
Read full storySean Hannity Says Trump Lost, He Got His Ass Kicked! So His Butt-Hurt Supporters Need To Get a Life and Move On
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Oh how times have changed. There was a time when Sean Hannity and Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump were as close as two gonads in a scrotum sack. Every night on his Fox show, Sean “Fred Flinstone” Hannity would sing th…
Read full storyCalifornia May Allow Betting on Criminal Trials
Sacramento, CA - Recognizing that the current state budget surplus was the result of unusual federal grants during the pandemic and that next year's budget will be billions short, California governor Gavin Newsom is considering a proposal that would…
Read full storyThe Semi-Nude Women’s Federated Football League To Implement Some Interesting Rules Changes
SAN FRANCISCO – (Sports Satire) – The Sports Bet Gazette has announced that the 2022 Women’s Federated Football League will be changing some established rules and will be adding others. League rep, Marsha Mickalicki, 31, said that one rule that is…
Read full storyTaliban set to allow women to practice mild nagging during daylight hours
Afghanistan's Taliban leaders have announced, that as part of their inclusivity policy towards women, a controlled amount of spousal nagging will be permitted from February this year during daylight hours, after which a strict ban will be imposed.
Read full story