MAR-a-LAGO – (Satire News) – Reports coming from The Daily Dirt News Agency state that a dozen agents from the FBI conducted a pre-dawn raid on Trump’s Dixieland mansion, Mar-a-Lago.
The Federal officers confiscated over 27 computers, lap tops, iPads, and sex toys.
The agent in charge, Mauricio Magellean, Jr., stated that agents checked every room in the 132-room Florida complex.
He commented that when they searched the Commemorative Marjorie Taylor Greene Bedroom, they found stashed underneath the king-sized bed, 19 gold bars that had been stolen from Fort Knox, Kentucky.
Agent Magellean pointed out that each gold bar weighed 100 grams and is worth $3,000, so the total value of the 19 gold bars is $57,000.
SIDENOTE: One of the nation's top lawyers regarding gold bar theft pointed out Trump could end up getting up to 9 years in prison.
