NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – In a move that at first was being blamed solely on the dreaded Trumpapalooza Virus, the most famous dance group in the world will be laying off 50% of their dancers.
A spokesperson for the New York City Rockettes, Rochelle Del Quell, 51, stated that although all of the girls are fine, the reason is purely financial.
Miss Del Quell, noted that the city of New York has had to cut back on many of its city sponsored groups; including the Hollistic Arts, Music From Around The World, the Central Park Squirrel Feeding Program, and Viagra For The Elderly Fellas.
Last summer, 10 of the Rockettes were laid off, due to income tax irregularities.
Troupe leader, Jenny Brownpenney, stated for the record that any girls who get laid off in 2022, will be able to collect unemployment insurance, still keep their official New York City Rockettes Card, and still get a 12% discount at any adult sex toy shop in downtown Manhattan.
