Mayan Professor Predicts End Of World: “Will Not Survive Biden Administration”

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Monday, 15 February 2021

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Carnac the Magnificent

BILLINGSGATE POST: It’s not easy to predict the end of the world. Not just because no one will be around to validate the prediction, but because very few colleges offer courses on the subject. Other than La Fontaine College, the Harvard of the Caribbean, there is no other school in the Western Hemisphere that includes this course in their curriculum.

Offering a doctorate degree in the discipline, La Fontaine’s Department of Doomsday is headed by Eoj Nedib, a descendant of the first Mayan medicine man and soothsayer, Hokum Nedib. Of ancillary coincidental value - some say it’s more than that - is the fact that Eoj Nedib spelled backwards = Joe Biden.

In an interview with CNN’s intrepid reporter, Don Lemon, President Biden, when informed of this factoid, tilted his mouth into a crooked smile, telling reporters that he was somewhat aware that his Irish ancestry might have been tinted by a chance encounter of one of his forefathers with a Mayan princess on holiday in Dublin around 500 years ago.

Moving forward, Professor Nedib, wearing an ancient Mayan headdress, similar to the one worn by Carnac the Magnificent, a “mystic from the East” who could psychically “divine” unknown answers to unseen questions, was handed the envelope containing the ultimate question:

Putting the hermetically-sealed envelope to his forehead, Professor Nedib rolls his eyes upward and responds:

“The end of the world.”

Blowing the envelope open, the Professor purses his lips and reads the question from the previously hermetically-sealed envelope that has been certified by a nationally recognized accounting firm:

“What happens when Kamala Harris becomes president?”

Dr. Slim: “Only a seer with mystic gifts could divine an unknown answer to an unseen question.”

Dirty: “Yo, Dr. Dude. Makes you wonder if the guy is on to something.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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