Teacher Resorted To Game Of Bingo To 'Kill Time'

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 9 February 2021

image for Teacher Resorted To Game Of Bingo To 'Kill Time'
Eyes down for a line or four corners!

A teacher at a school where students had completed their work, and were merely sitting and waiting for the term to end, has told how he blew the roof off the building when he told his charges there was going to be a game of Bingo.

The 9-year-old students had finished their studies as per the curriculum, reviewed the material, and already been tested, but were now expected to endure their final week watching endless animated Pixar movies they'd seen countless times before.

Moys Kenwood, 57, decided something special was needed. He explained the rules of the favorite seaside pastime, and quickly had the students make bingo cards with fifteen numbers of their choice between 1 and 50.

When everyone was ready, Kenwood said:

"Eyes down for your first number!"

The tension in the room was tangible. Nervous, expectant faces watched the Bingo Bag for signs of the first number. Silence was witnessed for the first time ever at the school.

"On the yellow line, unlucky for some, number 13," said Kenwood.

Two students said:


They'd put number 13 on their card. The rest of the class said:


They hadn't.

Taking an eternity to draw the balls from the bag, under the pretence of trying to build up even more of an exciting atmosphere, Kenwood eyed his watch, and the super-slow motion on its second hand as it traversed its way around the dial.

"Blue. Two little ducks, 22!"

"Yeeeeyyyyy!" said some little voices.

In this fashion, Bingo fought Time. Numbers were called, and excited responses given. Eventually, after what seemed like an eternity, somebody said:


But this was a false call, highlighting the importance of the correct pronunciation of the numbers 13 and 30.

The game went on and on and on, until the point when there was only one number remaining in the bag. Said the teacher:

"Top of the shop, green line, number 50!"

At this, the roof was raised, as every single one of the students called:


Then the bell sounded.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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