Man Has Got His Wife A Dildo For Valentine's Day

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 13 February 2021

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Happy Valentine's! Here's a dildo!

A man who was looking for an unusual and novel St. Valentine's Day gift for his wife, has gone for the jackpot this year, after revealing to workmates that he has got her a 12-inch black dildo.

Ron Lummox, 40, hit upon the brilliant idea as he browsed some questionable sites on the internet, and decided, there and then, that it would be "just what she wanted".

He ordered it immediately.

Ron's colleagues at work thought it was a marvellous idea. One, Tom Smith, 62, said:

"Yes, his wife likes a bit of 'slap and tickle', if that's what they still call it. She'll be over the moon!"

Ron said:

"My wife, Madge, is a keen 'bedroom player', and is often too keen for me. It's true to say that I sometimes have trouble 'keeping up' with her, if you know what I mean. Now, I won't have to!"

Madge, 38, already has a dildo that Ron doesn't know about.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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