Soldier Dressed As a Bush Gets Shot By Fellow Soldier

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 26 February 2021

image for Soldier Dressed As a Bush Gets Shot By Fellow Soldier
Private Jalalabad, just before he was shot by fellow soldier Private Tarmac.

(NOT EDITED) CAMEL KEBAB, Afghanistan – (Satire News) – Afghanistan’s Mirage News has admitted that a member of the Afghan army has shot one of his own fellow soldiers.

General Attula Hay Booboolay, stated somewhat embarrassingly, that he cannot deny the fact that Private Hakim Jalalabad, who was dressed as a mature bush, was shot by Private Quasar Tarmac.

The two soldiers had been following members of the Taliban, when Private Tarmac saw a nearby bush rustling. His army training instincts kicked in and he immediately shot the bush, before it shot him.

The bush fell to the ground, and he quickly rushed over, and shot it two more times, before hearing the bush yell out, "Stop shooting dude, it’s me Private Hakim Jalalabad!"

A medic instantly pulled half a dozen branches, as well as a falcon’s nest, off the bush, and ascertained that the bush, was indeed Private Jalalabad.

Luckily two of the three bullets hit the falcon's nest, and were deflected, but the third bullet hit Private Jalalabad right in the middle of his his belly button.

Meanwhile Private Tarmac, was arrested and will be spending 10 days in a military jail.

Reports are that Private Jalalabad will recover, but he may need to have a belly button transplant in two or three years.

Mirage News is reporting that the practice of the Afghan army using bushes as camouflage, has been immediately discontinued.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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