BILLINGSGATE POST: Most presidents are satisfied with having but one dog during their time in the White House. But Joe Biden has two, both German Shepherds, that were adopted by him before he moved in.
There have been countless variations of the story about a dog with two assholes. Never, as far as has been chronicled, and with dogs having been domesticated sometime between 27,000 and 40,000 years ago, has there been a story about two dogs with four assholes, both of whom happen to have as their master, the most powerful man on the face of the Earth.
And to add another element to the story, a curious mind might wonder if one of the dogs had three assholes and the other, just one.
It was on page one this morning, a picture of the President with his two dogs, Champ and Major, in the Oval Office. Also in the picture were Nancy Poozleosi, Chuck Schumer and Adam Schiff. It was a photo op, of course. President Biden was memorializing a new shipment of two billion dollars to Iran so that they could buy more centrifuges to reach their goal of nuclear bomb grade uranium before Trump comes back in 2024.
The first to check on the meeting was Press Secretary, Jen Psaki. She poked her head into the Oval Office, walked over to the dogs, looked under their respective tails, and walked out shaking her red head.
Then, a couple of minutes later, Ron Klain, Biden’s Chief of Staff, stepped into the office. After greeting the President, Nancy Poozleosi, Schumer and Schiff, in that order, he casually sauntered over to the mutts, patted them on their heads, checked under their tails, and, with a understanding wink, he left the office chuckling.
The President was befuddled, which was not unusual. He called Jen Psaki back into the office:
“What the heck is going on? Why did you guys check under Champ’s and Major’s tails?
Psaki had a wry grin on her face. “We heard there were two dogs in the Oval Office with four assholes.”
Dr. Slim: “I hope he gets another dog so we can do this all over again with six assholes.”
Dirty: “Yo, Dr. Dude. With so many assholes in the White House, this could go on ad infinitum.”