There were 168 spoof news stories published in March 2022. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Putin Wows In Blue Suit And Purple Tie Combo
It was his big moment on the world stage; with the eyes on the planet on him so it comes as no surprise that Vladimir Putin had to shine. The Russian President, 69, showcased his stunning physique in the Siberian-made bold outfit, which was acco…
Read full storyMass Walkout During Paralympics Unlikely - Says Doctor
A threatened walkout by Paralympians after Athletes from Russia and Belarus were allowed to compete as neutrals at the 2022 Winter Paralympics in Beijing following the invasion of Ukraine is highly unlikely claims a leading spinal surgeon. The In…
Read full storyThe Transgender Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Has Just Become a Multi-Millionaire!
DALLAS - (Sports Satire) - The happiest pro sports cheerleader in history is Staci Dinndabaca. The 26-year-old 'rah-rah' girl has just received a ton of money from Cowboys owner Jerry Jones. Sporting Chance Magazine is reporting that Jones decided…
Read full storyOne of The Most Beautiful Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Reveals That She’s Actually a He
DALLAS – (Satire News) – In a revelation that has stunned the NFL world, a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader has just announced that she is in fact a transgender. The Sports Bet Gazette’s senior writer Zorro La Bamba broke the story about Staci Dinndabac…
Read full storyIvanka Trump Reveals That Putin Texted Her 3 Hours Before Russia Invaded Ukraine
MOSCOW - (Satire News) - BuzzFuzz is reporting a story that has shocked the entire world. According to BuzzFuzz senior writer, Tafetta Kixx, Ivanka Trump confessed to her that a mere three hours before President Putin launched his invasion of Ukra…
Read full storyPresident Putin Now Realizes That Invading Ukraine Was A Big Fucking Mistake!
MOSCOW – (World Satire) – Ninety-seven percent of Putin’s cabinet says (behind his back of course) that their leader fucked up big time (as they say in Vegas). The Kremlin Voice has written that Putin should have learned to think things through be…
Read full storyRussian Anti-War Protesters Storm The Kremlin And Spray Paint “Putin Sux” On The Walls
MOSCOW – (World Satire) – The Kremlin resembled the US Capitol on January 6, as hundreds of young anti-Ukraine War protesters stormed the building and destroyed expensive paintings by Wassily Kandinsky, Marc Chagall, Ilya Repin, and Tinkerbell Foofin…
Read full storySTAIND To Headline Monsters of Rock Moscow 2022 as Aaron Lewis comes out as pro-Putin
MOSCOW – ‘Monsters of Rock Moscow 2022’ has announced Staind as their first headliner as the long defunct music festival has been resurrected as a Kremlin-pressured pro-war rally. American rock band STAIND has been announced as the first headliner…
Read full storyAllstate Signs Tom Brady and Tony Romo To Star With Aaron Rodgers In The Insurance Commercials
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – In an excellent advertising move, Allstate Insurance has announced that they have just signed the recently retired Tampa Bay Bucs quarterback Tom Brady, and the former Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo (now a CBS…
Read full storyPutin's Invasion of Ukraine Is The Real "March Madness"
MOSCOW - (World Satire) - The Kremlin Voice has turned on President Putin like Donald Trump turned on Rudy Giuliani, Michael Cohen, Megan Kelly, Tom Brady, and Stormy Daniels. The KV no longer fears Putin or his KGB enforcers. The national Russian…
Read full storyUkraine: The Biggest Rat F*ck Since The Trojan Horse
BILLINGSGATE POST: As far as wartime rat f*cks go, twenty-six centuries have passed since the Mother Of All Rat F*cks (MOARF) occurred. First mentioned in Homer’s Odyssey, the story of the Trojan Horse is well-known. It describes how Greek soldiers w…
Read full storyUkraine Invasion Was Planned by Donald Trump
A transcript released by the January 6th Select Committee details a conference call indicating that the invasion of Ukraine originated with Donald Trump and his associates Roger Stone, Steve Bannon and Paul Manafort (ie. the usual suspects). Rep. B…
Read full storyPutin Charges U.S. With War Crimes in WW2: Hiroshima, Nagasaki, Tokyo
Vladimir Putin today filed charges here with the International Criminal Court against the United States for omission of war crimes against civilians during World War II. The accusation is that the U.S. deliberately attacked civilian targets that had…
Read full storyVladimir Putin Is Devastated As He Learns That Wayward Chinese Space Junk Is Scheduled To Land On Moscow in Three Months
MOSCOW – (World Satire) – As if Vlady Putin doesn’t already have enough shit to worry about now comes word from The Kremlin Voice that some Chinese space junk is scheduled to land in Moscow within 90 days. The space crap is reportedly from the unm…
Read full storyMost Texas Citizens Want Gov. Greg Abbott Impeached and Exiled To Guatemala
AUSTIN - (Satire News) - Gov. Greg Abbott of Texas is hated by more Texans of all political parties, religious religions, and even atheistic atheists than anyone in the history of US politics. Abbott, who looks like an eggplant emoji, recently tol…
Read full storyDonald Trump To Film A Commercial For McDonalds and He Agrees To Get Paid In Big Macs
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - The word on the streets of the Big Apple, is that the twice-impeached, Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump has agreed to film a commercial for McDonalds. Mr. Melania Trump will film the commercial in Central Park, where h…
Read full storyPutin’s Other Invasions That We Forgot About
2008- Russia invades former 'comrade' nation Georgia because Putin 'has Georgia on his mind….'. March 2014- Russia takes over the Crimea because they want to protect their naval fleet, and their hidden stores of vodka. June 2014- Russia begins…
Read full storyA Ukrainian Regiment Made Up of Women Kicks One of Putin’s Most Powerful Regiment's Ass
FUKTOI, Ukraine - The Ukrainian government is reporting that the 903rd infantry regiment, which is comprised of female soldiers between the ages of 17 and 31, has beat the shit out of one of Russia's most powerful regiments. The 903rd, soundly def…
Read full storyNew US Congress to implement super DST
Mar a Largo - A new US Congress is already meeting. Comprised of projected winners, they have written a bill shaking the current administration in their diapers. Inspired by recent bills to make Daylight Savings Permanent, the new bill will sprin…
Read full storyPresident Biden To Visit Ukraine
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - White House Press Jen Psaki has just announced that President Biden will be traveling to Ukraine within the next few days. Psaki, whose name is pronounced "Saki," like the Japanese drink, pointed out that traveli…
Read full storyPresident Putin Is Now Blaming Trump For His Extremely Low Approval Rating
MOSCOW – (World Satire ) – The Kremlin Voice has said that Putin is putting the entire blame for all of the protests that are going on in every Russian city on the racist sexual predator (aka Trump). The KV noted that Putin said that when the wor…
Read full storyA Major Brewing Company Is Now Selling Viagra-Flavored Beer
BROOKLYN – (Satire News) – The Empire Castle Brewing Company has just introduced a brand new beer. A corporate spokesperson said that the new beer was 11 months in the developmental stages. The brewery took their signature beer, Empire Castle a…
Read full storyPutin Calls For Cacklemania Ceasefire
BILLINGSGATE POST: Haunted by the incessant cackle of Kamala Harris as she visits Poland and Romania, Vladimir Putin admits that his troops have become disoriented by the Ukraine loudspeakers that never stop blasting away the sounds of Kamala’s laug…
Read full storyIs Tucker Carlson The Tokyo Rose Of Russia’s Ukraine Invasion?
It seems like Tucker Carlson, of Fox News, is shooting off his mouth reminiscent of what Tokyo Rose did during World War II. Tokyo Rose hosted a Japanese propaganda radio program during World War II aimed at American service members in the South Paci…
Read full storyThe Phoenix Suns Are Kicking Every Other NBA Team's Collective Asses!
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - Word from the office of NBA Commissioner Ron Silver say that the Phoenix Suns are playing the best ball in the entire NBA. Their record, as of press time, was an astounding 53-13. Sun's coach Earl "The Pearl" Wats…
Read full storySarah Ferguson, The Duchess of York, Chimes In On The Will Smith - Chris Rock Oscars Incident
LONDON - (Satire News) - The former Duchess of York was recently asked what she thought about the incident at the Oscars, where Will Smith (a black man) went up on the stage before a world-wide audience of millions and ambushed comedian Chris Rock (a…
Read full storyTrump Slaps Ted Cruz at MAGA Rally Because “His Wife is Still Ugly”
Dallas - Appearing at a Trump rally just outside Dallas yesterday, Texas Senator Ted Cruz spoke briefly to the audience of red hatted MAGA cult fans and said he still supports the former President, even after Trump had noted in 2016 that Cruz's wife…
Read full storyRussia Requests Military Assistance From China, Syria, Germany, (oops, Russia's mistake) And North Korea
The request for Germany's military assistance was a pipe-dream mistake created by a Russian subordinate's intern who had a sense of humor. (And who has since fallen out of a 6th story window.) Syria claims that they are fresh out of extra killin…
Read full storyMailman accused of sending turkey to an early Thanksgiving
Quaker Press: A mail carrier in Albuquerque, New Mexico has been accused of fowl play after going postal on a wild turkey named Tommy. The bird apparently accosted the letter carrier Monday, and started to interact with his leg, prompting him to g…
Read full storyThe Free World's Convoy Is Slowly Moving Toward The Kremlin
Everyone can see the satellite photos of the Russian convoy mired in Ukraine out of fuel, food, and future. Guessing here, but why haven't they called for AAA or roadside service to provide some fuel? Or maybe they're having second thoughts and are c…
Read full storyPresident Putin Reveals That He Has Fallen Madly In Love With Melania Trump
MOSCOW - (Satire News) - Close associates of President Putin say that the Russia leader is getting flakier and flakier. One longtime assistant said that one day Put, as his close friends call him, went outside by the swimming pool wearing a flip…
Read full storyBoris Johnson comes up with 6 point plan to defeat Putin
This morning, Prime Minister Boris Johnson published his 6 point plan to help Ukraine win their fight against Vladimir Putin. The plan will be carried out by Johnson personally: 1. Ask Boris's Russian chums to keep quiet about funding the Tori…
Read full storyAfter Will Smith Punches Chris Rock, 14 Standup Comedians Apologize For Making Jokes About His Wife (Jada)
LOS ANGELES - (Satire News) - BuzzFuzz reports that within 24 hours of Will Smith sucker punching Chris Rock at the Oscars, a total of 14 comedians apologized to Will for making jokes about his "Open Marriage" wife (Jada Pinkett Smith). Comedians…
Read full storyAmazon Prime price raised as dismantling of Golden Gate Bridge in sights for Bezos' superyacht
SEATTLE – Amazon’s Prime membership will become more expensive starting 2023 as the company cites inflation, growing wages, and transportation costs to justify the price increases. However, insiders reveal that a plan is in progress to build a sup…
Read full storyThe FBI Is Conducting a Thorough Investigation Into The Terroristic Antics of Will Smith
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (US Satire) - Reports from several news agencies state that the Federal Bureau of Investigation has opened up an investigatory investigation into the dangerously serious fucked up antics of Willard Carroll Smith, Jr. A spokesper…
Read full storyBBC's Rageh Omaar has spent 88 per cent of his life on battle zone rooftops, study reveals
A recent study of the journalistic career of the award-winning BBC war correspondent, Rageh Omaar, has revealed that he has spent more than three-quarters of his entire life, broadcasting from flat rooftops in various trouble spots around the world.
Read full storyMy hatred for dithering old lady in post office exceeded that of Achilles towards Hector, says local man
A 54-year-old Whitechapel man has told a local newspaper that the naked and unfettered hatred he felt towards an elderly lady who kept him waiting in line at the post office exceeded the burning loathing that the Ancient Greek hero, Achilles, felt to…
Read full storyRevloins Hires Sarah Ferguson To Be The New Model For Their New Duchess Red Toe Nail Polish
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - BuzzFuzz has just broken the story that the Duchess of York, aka Sarah Ferguson has just signed a contract with the largest women's beauty company in the nation. Revloins signed Fergie, as she is better known, to ap…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene and Oprah Winfrey Each Address The Rumor That They Are Having a Lesbionic Relationship
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The never-ending rumor mills have been working overtime lately. And as of today, the biggest rumor in the nation is that Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene and multi-billionaire Oprah Winfrey are having a same-sex cons…
Read full storyScotland Yard Has Captured The Notorious Taliban Hitman, Saheed Fasha Shasta
LONDON - (UK Satire) - Scotland Yard is happy to announce that they have just managed to capture one of the world's most infamous terrorist hit men, Saheed Fasha Shasta. A spokesperson for Scotland Yard stated that after receiving a tip from US in…
Read full storyKate Gosselin Denies She's Expecting Quintuplets
WYOMISSING, Pennsylvania - (Satire News) - Well folks the mother of 8 (a set of sextuplets and 2 singles) is denying that she has been impregnated yet again. The 46-year-old self-proclaimed "Queen of The Reality Shows" told Papaya Bamboo with Tabl…
Read full storyC.I.J. goes Bonkers on world Z
Citizen Press: In world Z, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, an evil man creature filled with malice and cruelty named Vader, assembled a group of ex-milatary personnel, to create a private intelligence corporation, to subvert the Jabu race…
Read full storyU.S. Customs Officers In Laredo Discover 9 Pounds of Marijuana In a Woman’s Fake Ass
LAREDO, Texas – (Satire News) – The United States Department of Immigration and Customs has pretty much seen it all as far as individuals trying to smuggle illegal drugs into the U.S. Laredo Sector Director Melody G. Ventinberry, 43, reported that…
Read full storyA Republican Woman Is Caught Wearing Rainbow Panties
KISSIMMEE, Florida – (Satire News) – A recent Quinnipinni Poll showed that 98.3% of all Republicans are anti-gay and anti-lesbian. Of course many will deny it since some, strangely enough, now have some member of their family, who bats for the oth…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Will Be Selling GOP Panties With All The Profits Going To Pay For Trump’s Legal Defense
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The Hearsay Today News Agency has reported that the Trumptard’s lawyer fees have already exceeded $8 million. Reporter Abby Yukon noted that the avowed racist is used to stiffing any and all attorneys, constructi…
Read full storyVladimir Putin: Bad Boy Or So Misunderstood?
BILLINGSGATE POST: Joseph Stalin, Adolf Hitler, Pol Pot; all had something in common: Each sang in the church choir before becoming tyrants who launched war on their people, killing millions before being swept into the dustbin of history. Now Vladim…
Read full storyThe Reason Why "The Batman" Was Banned In Russia
MOSCOW - (Satire News) - LaLaLand Daily has just revealed why the highly sucessful "The Batman" movie was banned in Russia. Reporter Huckleberry Citrus, said that he spoke with an old high school friend who now lives in Moscow, and he told him tha…
Read full storyCambodia Is Sending Their Lone Aircraft Carrier To Help Ukraine
PHNOM PENH, Cambodia - (World Satire) - The Ukraine is happy to announce that the government of Cambodia is sending their aircraft carrier, the CS Bamboo Stick, to help in Ukraine's war against the Communistic pantywaist Russian army. A rep for Ca…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Shows Off Her Huge Engagement Ring
BALTIMORE - (Satire News) - Marjorie Taylor Greene has been acting very strange lately. The extremely unpopular Congresswoman from Georgia, allegedly got engaged on a recent trip to Baltimore. MTG, when asked by several reporters, refused to say w…
Read full storyRussian Oligarchs Are Buying Up Las Vegas Gambling Casinos
LAS VEGAS – (Satire News) – Boom Boom News is reporting that Russian oligarchs are anxiously taking their money out of Russia, which is in danger of failing financially by the end of the year. Hacienda Fiddle with BBN spoke with a high profile wri…
Read full storyThe most futuristic King Kong movie
Bollywood Press: The remake of the 1933 classic 'King Kong' movie came to a screeching stop before production started as Pixal Animation tries to figure out how to introduce the first sex scene between Kong and his female co-star Scarlett Hansen.
Read full storyWill The World Or Russian Generals Stop Putin?
The whole world is nervous about upsetting Putin. Putin reminded the world that he had nuclear weapons. So there! Don't you dare interfere with my slaughter in Ukraine or else. The world was left shaking in its boots because of the or else.
Read full storyThree Plane Loads of Ukrainian Refugees Are Headed To Iowa
WATERLOO, Iowa – (Satire News) – Reports coming out of Ukraine state that tens of thousands of it’s citizens are leaving the country post-haste due to the Russian invasion, as well as the spider monkey infestation. One report stated that three pla…
Read full storySeveral Russian Oligarchs Predict That President Putin Will Be Impeached
MOSCOW – (World Satire) – The word from the Kremlin is that the rich-as-hell oligarchs of Russia are fed up with the way Putin is handling the war. The Ukrainian army is decimating the Russian army at an alarming rate. Reports from the war front s…
Read full storyRussia In a Shocking Move Will Retreat From Ukraine and Move To Invade Denmark
MOSCOW – (World Satire) – The Kremlin Voice has just announced some news that has shocked the entire world, but in a very good way, at least as far as Ukraine is concerned. In what political and military experts are calling one of the biggest “Min…
Read full storyTo Z or Not-Z? That is the question!
People in Ukraine are straining their brains and craning their necks to figure out why all the Z’s are painted on Russian tanks here, according to Gladimhere Poopnshitsky, resident interviewed by Z-news10. “I was happily taken a crap today when I…
Read full storyPutin Is Livid At The Mass Exocus of US Companies From Russia
MOSCOW - (World Satire) - The Kremlin Voice has just announced that dozens of American companies and fast food chains are abandoning Vlady The Prick's beloved Russia. A spokesperson for the McDonalds franchise chain told the KV that they will be c…
Read full storyPutin Now Realizes That He Messed Up Big Time By Invading Ukraine
MOSCOW – (World Satire) – The Kremlin Voice has just reported that Russian President Vladimir Putin told one of his closest aides that he knows he fucked up bad by launching an attack on Ukraine. He even admitted that two hours before he ordered t…
Read full storyRussia's Most Beautiful Spy Is Captured By The Ukrainians
MOSCOW – (World Satire) – The Alpha Beta News Agency is reporting that a Ukrainian artillery regiment has captured Russia's most beautiful spy Margosha Vladavich (aka Agent Libido). Margosha is a ravishingly beautiful sultry hazel-eyed blonde, wh…
Read full storyHow The Tampa Bay Buccaneers Were Able To Lure Tom Brady Out of Retirement
TAMPA BAY – (Sports Satire) – Many individuals in the world of sports are wondering just exactly how the hell the Tampa Bay Bucs were able to get Tom Brady to come out of retirement. Sports Bet Gazette senior reporter Zorro La Bamba, actually spok…
Read full storyUkraine's Prez Zelensky To Perform Comedy Special For Peace
Kiev - Ukraine's President Zelensky will return to his former job, to perform an hour and half comedy special, promoting renewed peace between Ukraine and Russia. But many Ukrainians are skeptical that it will work. "I am with our President, but I…
Read full storyChris Rock Files a $97 Million Assault Lawsuit Against Will Smith
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - BuzzFuzz is reporting that Chris Rock has filed a multi-million dollar lawsuit against the "Sucker-Punching Bully" aka Will Smith. Rock has hired the services of noted lawsuit attorney Gloria Allred, who has a won-loss…
Read full storyPresident Putin Invites Ivanka Trump To Visit Russia - She Accepts
MOSCOW - (World Satire) - The Kremlin Voice is buzzing like crazy as word from the Kremlin says that Putin has invited the sexy, long-legged Ivanka Trump to be the honored guest of the Russian leader. As the KV has stated it is no secret that the…
Read full storyJada Pinkett Smith Files For Divorce - Will Smith Is Devastated!
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - In a move that has not really surprised those who are in the know, Jada Pinkett Smith has hired famed divorce attorney Gloria Allred, and she has filed for divorce from her extremely tempermental, totally out-of-control hu…
Read full storyA New Pun From An Old Spoofer
The young first-year philosophy professor faced a common end-of-the-term dilemma in an introductory course: one two-hour session left but four hours of ideas that had not been presented yet. Moreover, he was losing his voice. The raspy sound w…
Read full storyA Russian Ski Jumping Champion Who Is Fighting In Ukraine Defects
POLTAVA, Ukraine - - (Sports World) - Word coming from an independent Ukrainian news agency is reporting that Russian silver-medal winner in the recent Winter Olympics has defected to the Ukrainian side. Ski jumper Vlady Vishavich, 39, who recentl…
Read full storySales of Sarah Ferguson’s Duchess Fergie Sandals Are Going Through The Roof
LONDON – (Satire News) – There is no one in the United Kingdom who is happier at the moment that Sarah "The Red Babe" Ferguson, the Duchess of York. Fergie, as she is known world-wide, has just been informed that sales of her magenta-colored desig…
Read full storyUK pretends to welcome Ukrainian refugees
The war in Ukraine has led to the largest humanitarian crisis in Europe since the Second World War. Over a million refugees have fled the country so far. Most European nations have agreed to accept a large number of them, but the UK is lagging behind…
Read full storyWhat Kind Of Monster Bombs A Maternity Ward?
Having a baby is often a life threatening experience. But to have to dodge bombs, be carried out of a hospital on a stretcher, across the street to a bomb shelter and have a baby there is a travesty. Russian people would never approve of that kind of…
Read full storyAaron Rodgers Tells Ex-Girlfriend Danica Patrick To Stop Texting Him
GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Satire News) - Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers reportedly told his ex-NASCAR driver girlfriend, Danica Patrick, to please not send him anymore texts. According to Sporting Chance Magazine's Hercules Confetti, th…
Read full storyBrowns now regret letting Baker Mayfield Move into First Energy Stadium
After the sudden courtship of Deshawn Watson the breakup between the Cleveland Browns and Baker Mayfield was inevitable. With Watson's signing it is now a foregone conclusion, and about to get messy. The most contentious issue now facing both part…
Read full storyCeline Dion Is Asked To Be The Poster Woman For Adult Female Anorexia Nervosa
LAS VEGAS - (Satire News) - The Alpha Beta News Agency has just revealed that the American Federation of Adult Female Anorexia Nervosa has contacted famed singer Celine Dion about becoming the official spokeswoman for the dreaded disease. ABNA wri…
Read full storyPutin's mental state called into question
Russian dictator Vladimir Putin's broadcasts have been increasing unhinged lately. Yesterday, he introduced his closest adviser, the hand puppet "Mr Sock", who agreed with Putin about the necessity of conquering Ukraine. Mr Sock's voice could not…
Read full storyA Hollywood Pole Dancer Raffles Off Her Diamond Studded Flip Flops And Donates All The Money To The People of Ukraine
WEST HOLLYWOOD, California – In an extremely charitable display of kindness and compassion, a well-known pole dancer, has just raffled off her diamond-studded flip flops on eBay. The wonderfully caring and sensuously erotic pole dancer is Lolita C…
Read full storyRight Before Putin Death Star Vaporizes America Trump Asks Russian Leader for More Dirt on Clintons and Bidens
Moscow - Just after Vladimir Putin revealed that he had developed a large orbiting platform with a powerful laser which could entirely destroy the United States, former President Donald Trump requested that the Russian dictator reveal all of the hidd…
Read full storyThe KKK Has Told Will Smith He Can Join Their Organization If He Wants To
DUCK DUNG, Alabama - (Satire News) - One of the nation's largest Ku Klux Klan chapters has just sent Hollywood B-actor, Will "The Sensitive SOB" Smith, an email saying that they would love for him to join their anti-Black organization. Smith repor…
Read full storyThe Government of China Has Just Purchased The Largest Whorehouse in Las Vegas
LAS VEGAS – (Satire News) – The government of China continues to buy American banks, factories, sports teams, and now the Wild Whispers News Agency is reporting that the Chinese government has just purchased the biggest house of ill repute in the ent…
Read full storyMask mandate lifting for travel, but some worried about not being told what to do next
The federal mandate for face coverings on airplanes is set to expire April 18th to the joy of millions of Americans. One of the last pandemic era federal restrictions for masks is finally coming to an end as the country continues to see its way out o…
Read full story$38M in Ether fundraised for Julian Assange mysteriously extradited to anonymous Russian hacker
Members of the crypto community have raised more than $38M for Julian Assange, the founder of Wikileaks, who is currently imprisoned on multiple charges in London. AssangeDao, a decentralized autonomous organization, is a fundraising group created…
Read full storyA Stunningly Sexy-As-Hell Ukrainian Spy Seduces One of Russia's Top Military Generals
KYIV, Ukraine - (World Satire) - One thing about Ukraine is that they are noted for having the most beautiful, sexiest, horniest female spies in the female spy business. Most Ukrainian female spies have DD breasts, long, slender legs, and an ass t…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Says She Has The Hots For Valdimir Putin
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - One thing that Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene is definitely not is shy. iNews reported that when MTG was in college she once streaked the length of the largest college cafeteria on campus while wearing nothing but a d…
Read full storyMeerkats changing their Accents
Famed Russian Meerkats Boris and Pasternak Orlov are changing their accents from Russian ones to Birmingham ones. ‘Alright there bab?’ asked Boris ‘Pasternak and mysen like are well known on the Telly like, for our thick Russian accents, but we th…
Read full storyRob Pattinson's "The Batman" Is The Greatest Batman Movie of All-Time!
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - Every Hollywood movie publication is singing the praises of the latest installment in the Batman franchise. Hollywood Innuendo writer Fajita San Guacamole wrote that Rob Pattinson is the sexiest of any of the previous B…
Read full storyA Cincinnati Woman Is Pregnant With Tentuplets
CINCINNATI, Ohio – (Satire News) – Tabloid Today has just made it known that a 47-year-old, unmarried cleaning woman will soon be giving birth to Tentuplets. TT’s Papaya Bamboo learned that the woman’s name is Haddie “Beyonce” Bangberry, and she…
Read full storyThird local angler found slain: Police launch hunt for 'Jack The Kipper'
Following the discovery of the mutilated body of a third fisherman on the banks of the River Lea in East London, Whitechapel police have announced they have received a letter, believed to be from the killer, in which he outlines his motives and signs…
Read full storyDonald Trump Gets Bit On His Fat Ass By a Skunk
ROTTEN PEACHES, Georgia - (Sports Satire) - Reporter Kitty Segovia with the iNews News Agency broke the story that Old Donald J. Trump got bit by a skunk as he was playing golf. An eyewitness told Miss Segovia that DJT had just stepped onto the gr…
Read full storyRussian hookers disguise their nationality to boost trade
Everyone from condom manufacturers and toilet paper suppliers to chartered accountants and hairdressers are flying the Ukrainian flag to show their support for the war-torn nation. Even Elton John has said he would now like to be known as "Sergei".
Read full storyWill Smith: “I’m Not Gonna Hit You. The Hell I’m Not!”
BILLINGSGATE POST: Not since John Wayne suddenly changed his mind in the movie, McClintock!, has there been such a reversal of course versus one’s initial statement. When President Biden went off-script by suggesting that Vladimir Putin lose his…
Read full storyThousands of Putin's Soldiers Are Defecting Daily!
MOSCOW - (Satire News) - One of Putin's closest advisors has informed The Kremlin Voice that the Russian leader is angry-as-hell after reading reports that every day thousands of his regular troops are defecting. The report stated that the Communi…
Read full storyDonald Trump Fires Blanks Begging For Putin's Help
While Attorney General Merrick Garland was recently certified alive and well, Donald Trump used another avenue to slow and distract from his involvement in the January 6 insurrection attempt. Trump tried to overthrow a legitimate democratic election,…
Read full storyPresident Putin Is So Afraid of Being Poisoned That He Is Eating Nothing But Big Macs
MOSCOW - (Satire News) - Moscow's TV Channel 903 is reporting that a highly reliable source inside Putin's circle has revealed that the Russian leader is deathly afraid of being poisoned. The insider who said her nickname is "Fluffy" commented tha…
Read full storyPresident Putin Finally Admits That He Has Erectile Dysfunction
MOSCOW – (Satire News) – Russian president Vladimir Putin says that lately he has had a lot of stress. He noted that with the mess in the Ukraine, the shit storm in France, and now the uprising in Greenland, he hardly gets to sleep 55 minutes a ni…
Read full storyGovernment commission determines no foul play in President Lincoln's death
A new Biden appointed government commission determined that there was no foul play in President Lincoln's death. The Lincoln Memorial is gong to be converted into a monument to Joe Biden to help erase false memories of "conspiracy theories" regardin…
Read full storyFighting Mad Boxing Promotions Will Put On The Will Smith Vs. Chris Rock Celebrity Boxing Match
LAS VEGAS - (Sports Satire) - The biggest boxing match in the history of the pugilistic sport has been set to take place in Las Vegas on September 10. Fighting Mad Boxing Promotions has signed Will Smith and Chris Rock to fight in a scheduled 10-…
Read full storyNeighbours Actors Flocking to Stratford Upon Avon
Following the shock axing of the middle of the road snoozefest Neighbours, all of the cast are currently heading to Stratford Upon Avon to chance their arms at the bard's best-known plays. Toadfish Rebecci said 'Alright, mate, I wanted to do some…
Read full storyChris Rock To Star In G.I. Jane 2 With Jada Pinkett Smith, Will Smith, Ricky Gervais, and Yo Yo Afro Woke
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - Tittle Tattle Tonight has just broken the story that comedian Chris Rock will be staring with Will Smith, Jada Pinkett Smith (Will's wife), rap singer Yo Yo Afro Woke, and Brit twit Ricky Gervais in the sequel to G.I. Jan…
Read full storyIrish Countdown cancelled after viewers ask, 'What's a vowel?'
A special St Patrick's Day edition of popular word quiz Countdown has been pulled off air after Channel RTE was inundated with calls from confused viewers asking what were these things called vowels that kept getting offered to contestants. "It wa…
Read full storyPutin vows to protect vodka drinkers around the world
Russian President Vladimir Putin announced his intention Monday "to punish every country on earth which makes it difficult to drink Russian vodka" following news that retailers around the world had pulled the spirits from their shelves as part of an…
Read full storyBiden's "Putin must go" leads to new interpretations of "Let's go Brandon"
Mr. Biden's current pronouncement that "Putin must go" has brought an almost immediate response from US intelligence. Laying out whoever "must go" has of course been a noble sentiment from far back in political discourse, including as applied to M…
Read full storyLocal mum forced to abort car journey after teen son leaves home without masturbating
A 39-year-old mother of two from Whitechapel in East London was forced to turn back ten minutes into a car journey after her 16-year-old son complained that he hadn’t masturbated before leaving home. Tracy Dell from Vallance Road, told The East Lo…
Read full storyRussia's Top Infantry Division Surrenders To a Ukrainian Group of Freedom Fighters
MOSCOW - (World Satire) - The Kremlin Voice is reporting that one of President Putin's crack infantry divisions was ambushed and after some very heavy fighting they surrendered to a volunteer group of Ukrainian freedom fighters. The KV stated that…
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