There were 205 spoof news stories published in August 2018. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Where are they now? Brentford Nylons
Those were the days or rather the nights. The nights when you and your blonde teenage girlfriend would indulge in carnal pleasures, all snug and warm in her single bed in Willesden with its Brentford Nylons fitted sheets and pillow case. (Sorry, am I reminiscing too much here?) In the morning, you'd reluctantly drag your sweating exhausted body away from her charms and set foot out of the bed only...
Read full storyThe Greatest Escape: A Magician's Tale
I’m baaaaaaaaack! Not much to brag about though. Here I am, lying on the train tracks in a dark, dreary NYC subway tunnel under Grand Central Station. Just been hit by a speeding train, my body is bloody and battered. Ouch! I’m a magician, so I’ll just have to work some magic to pull myself together and get out of here. I’ve been dead since 1926, I died of peritonitis, but I’m not gonna let...
Read full storyDouble Trouble
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. That was several years ago. They haven’t been seen since. Okay, okay, strictly speaking, the twins didn’t go to “fetch a pail of water.” It didn’t happen exactly like the nursery rhyme. But they DID go up a hill and were never seen coming down. That’s a definite. And water played a big, big part in the story of the two missing seventh...
Read full storyChimpanzee Star Of 1996 Film “Ed” Accused Of Sexual Harassment
A female crew member and a male actor from the 1996 smash hit film “Ed” have come forward to accuse the film’s primate star of sexual harassment. The events, first reported by TMZ and the Huffington Post, allegedly occurred during the film’s produ...
Read full storyShock as Sir Elton John turns to Country Music
Sir Elton John may have said "let one of your fucking country singers do it" on hearing the rumour that he was to perform at President-elect Donald Trump's inauguration, but deep down, it seems he is a fan of the mawkishly boring and notoriously homo...
Read full storyElvis Presley Sightings Suggest He May Still Be Alive
The King is Dead! Or is he? The death of Elvis Presley, the King of Rock and Roll, on 16 August 1977, shook the world to its very foundations, and set in motion a concerted effort by heartbroken fans to prove that it was all a hoax, and that h...
Read full storyUS Tomahawk Missiles Hit Iran Transportation Hub: 21 Camels Destroyed
BILLINGSGATE POST: US ships in the Persian Gulf unleashed 67 deadly Tomahawk missiles this morning, blowing up a confirmed body count of 21 dromedaries, the major source of commercial transportation in Iran. These camels carry vital shipments of dat...
Read full storyPhysicists Replace String Theory With Fidget Spinner Theory
Claiming that String Theory, the theory that the universe is composed of tiny strings which behave like both waves and particles, makes too much sense, and is too intuitive, and must therefore be false, physicists at a big impressive conference met a...
Read full storyTrump Buys Huge, Fortified Estate in Russia
Mar-A-Lago, FL President Obama's secret bugs in the White House have revealed that President Trump has been trying to purchase a very large estate in Russia, surrounded by a moat and a BIG WALL. He has finally closed on it, after securing loans from...
Read full storyTrump Brothers Withdraw All of the U.S.Treasury's Money and Lose it All on Roulette
Las Vegas, NV Donald Trump, Jr., Eric Trump, and their brother-in-law, Jared Kushner, talked Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin into giving them a blank treasury check to bet with because they had a "sure thing." "Well, Donnie and I were talking ab...
Read full storyDallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Reunion Party Ends In Chaos And Disgrace
A reunion party organised for past members of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders has ended in controversy, uproar, chaos and disgrace. The party, last Wednesday at Texas Stadium, started well enough, with singing and dancing on a huge stage on the fi...
Read full storyMan Wakes Up To Find That He Can Recite Pi To A Million Places
There was a surprise in store for a man in Battambang on Sunday morning, when, woken suddenly from his slumbers by a carhorn outside his window, he started to recite the mathematical constant, Pi. Moys Kenwood, 55, was a reasonable Math student at...
Read full storyGrange Hill Roland Says He Only Ate When He Was Hungry
Erkan Mustafa, the child actor who was one of the stars in children's teatime drama 'Grange Hill', has claimed that he wasn't fat, he just had big bones. Mustafa, who played overweight Roland Browning - nickname 'Roly' - could be seen almost perpe...
Read full storyPETA Rescues Animal Crackers; Poachers and Hunters Overjoyed
Nabiscuit, owner of Humbug's Animal Crackers, under pressure from the People for the Extermination of Animals (PETA), has done “the unthinkable,” Greg Shee Ann, the Acting Director of the United States Fish and Wildlife Service, whined. The compan...
Read full story“So You Think You Can Dance” To Feature First Quadriplegic Dance Crew
In the midst of declining ratings over the past 15 seasons of So You Think You Can Dance, producer Jessica Lively confirmed today that the show has been picked up for an additional season to premier in 2019. Despite the dwindling viewership, she...
Read full storyDinosaur Extinction Re-examined By God Squad's Teacher John
Dinosaurs, which were thought to have disappeared from Earth more than 65 million years ago, did not, according to a teaching colleague of Spoof writer, Moys Kenwood. Teacher John, a Science 'expert', made the astounding claim during a long lectur...
Read full storyDavid Pecker of the National Enquirer Rose to the Occasion For Trump Many Times
The Mueller Investigation recently gave immunity to Trump's "friend" David Pecker regarding testifying about the President's expenses. When Trump needed Pecker to kill a story, Pecker would rise to the occasion. He would buy negative stories abou...
Read full storySt. Jude Children’s Hospital To Host “Little Miss Cancer Pageant”
Earlier today, St. Jude Children’s Hospital confirmed that they will be debuting their much anticipated “Little Miss Cancer Pageant”. Children under the age of sixteen are encouraged to sign up prior to the December 1st deadline, so long as they are...
Read full storySodden Carnival makes Notting Hill Revellers proud to be British
Sunday's wash out on the streets of Notting Hill brought the true spirit of Being British out in full force. A man dressed in a bin bag told us, "It's what it's all about, innit? Carnival's not all about colour, music, celebration and creativity. We...
Read full storyStock Market Goes Down, Then Up, Then Down Again.
The stock market went up, then down, then up, then down, then up, then down. It then rose before dropping. This was quickly followed by an increase, which was interrupted by a fall. The market then went up, then back down. It went up, down, u...
Read full storyCaterpillar Death Reveals How Gruesome Nature Is
A caterpillar killed outside a house in the Battambang commune of Tapon this morning, revealed just how disgusting Nature really is. The animal, a Black Fuzzy Caterpillar, about two inches in length, as thick as an adult finger, and seemingly cove...
Read full storyPiss up in a German brewery ends up in plastic boob battle!!
Dusseldorf; Saturday 18th August...After being invited to a super wedding at a German private brewery, Jaggedone, boob looker imperial, found out there was much to be observed after a number of German Fraulein's decided to hang it all out! As the...
Read full story“A Mighty Fortress Is Our Trump”
For the Evangelicals Still Standing by Their Man A mighty fortress is our Trump, a bulwark ever flailing; our Savior he amid the flood, his moral ills prevailing. For still Trump’s dauntless foes do seek to work Him woe; their craft and power are great, and armed with cruel facts, on earth are not their equals. Did we in our own strength take pride, our striving would be b...
Read full storyBox Office: ‘The Meg’ to Swallow a HUGE $60 Million-Plus Launch
Jason Statham's big budget epic “The Meg” is eyeing a North American opening weekend in the $60 million range, early tracking shows. The lower end of estimates come in at $48 million, while others are speculating earnings as high as $65 million.
Read full storyTrump Signs Executive Order Requiring All Scientific Discoveries to Be Approved by Him
Mar-A-Lago, FL President Trump appeared at a signing ceremony this morning to implement his new executive order requiring scientists to get approval from him before releasing new scientific discoveries. "I'm only doing this to protect Americans.
Read full storyPonzi Schemes Will Be the Next Big Investment During the Trump Administration
Economists have predicted that once the economy begins to tank due to high tariffs and voodoo trickle-down theories, some of the most popular investments will once more be Ponzi Schemes as investors once again look for a sure thing, with low investm...
Read full storyAbba to Reform with Grayson Perry
The music world is agog at the news that Swedish purveyors of mind-numbing middle of the road nondescript pop Abba is to reform for a world tour but without Agnetha, blonde bombshell and former "Rear of the Year". Agnetha Fältskog is now living as...
Read full storyThere She Was--Miss America
It was okay for Gretchen Carlson to strut her stuff onstage during the 1989 Miss America Beauty Pageant, but that was a looonnnnnngggggggg time ago. Carlson, who was born (some say spawned) in 1966, was only 29 then, and she had, according to the jud...
Read full storyMind Reader Told Crowd What They Were Thinking
In a case that is sure to have the science world unravelling, a man who claimed that he could 'read people's minds', and tell them exactly what they were thinking about, did just that. The man made the astonishing claim in front of a large crowd o...
Read full storyStill MORE Stuff from the Progressive Shoppers’ Mart – The Premier E-tailing Site for Enlightened Ideologues
Back by popular demand! We’ve been busy searching and nabbing the latest gems from your cherished lefty-progressive radicals. And now they’re here online! As always, to ensure you get your share of these treasures, you’ll need to move faster than...
Read full storyThe Real Reason Liam Left Cheryl
Liam Payne from Boyband One Direction, has revealed the real reason he left his twice-married wife Cheryl, today. In a typically candid and outspoken interview, Liam revealed that Cheryl was obsessed with her figure, and refused to get pregnant in...
Read full storySpoof Writers Reach Agreement Over Pay Offer
Spoof writers were said to be 'satisfied' last night after months of patient negotiations with Spoofboss Mark Lowton finally paid off. The writers emerged from the Lowton residence just before midnight on Monday evening, and set fire to a wheelie...
Read full storyGod Admits He Is An Atheist
The world was left stunned today when the almighty God descended from on high to announce that He, the Alpha and Omega, has officially become an atheist. The surprising revelation had an even more surprising origin, as the Father confirmed that the c...
Read full storyFBI detains Trump family pet poodle; canine said to be cooperating with investigators
Washington, DC In another sign that the Mueller team charges with investigating Russian Collusion is closing in in the President himself, the French Poodle “Fifi”, a gift from the President to his wife Melania, has been detained by FBI special age...
Read full storyBeatles Getting Back Together
At a London press conference, Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr announced their plans to get the rock group back together and start touring again. The plans involve cloning John Lennon and George Harrison in a procedure costing an estimated 21 Billi...
Read full storyPaine Fights Moe Howard, Eagles in “I Plan to Kill You Now, Too”
Hollywood is all aflutter for the upcoming release of action movie star Jordie Paine’s new summer blockbuster, I Plan to Kill You Now, Too. It’s the highly-anticipated sequel to the 2016 film, I Plan to Kill You Now, in which the musclebound assas...
Read full storyShoplifting Now UK's Fastest-growing Industry
There was brighter news for industry today, when it was announced that, despite poor performances in nearly all the UK's industry sectors, there was one major area of growth - shoplifting. Whilst energy, manufacturing, the services sector, financi...
Read full storyNew Study Suggests Your Pets Not Actually Children
In a shocking study released by Arizona State University on Monday, researchers suggested that your pets may not actually be children. The consensus has attracted criticism from pet owners and scientists alike, who have nothing else tethering them to...
Read full storyBarry Chuckle Has Chuckled His Last Chuckle
Barry Chuckle, one half of the Chuckle Brothers, the zany, chuckling, brothers who caused so much chuckling in the 1980s, 90s and in the early part of this century, has chuckled his very last chuckle, I can confirm. Barry, 73, had been ill for som...
Read full storyMerde On The Orient Express
There was a major controversy in South London on Saturday afternoon, when French football supporters travelling to a game in Leytonstone were confronted by a problem they could not, in their wildest dreams, ever have imagined - a merde on the Orient...
Read full storyVolga Olga to star in Hollywood blockbuster called 'Lethal Pussy 69!'
Insatiable, 85-year-old, super-nymphomaniac, Russian hag, Volga Olga, has had her (wet) dream come true and will play the leading role in a Hollywood blockbuster directed by none other than Quentin Tarantino! Volga Olga came to fame in the fabulou...
Read full storyAmazon announces the 'Hey you!' digital assistant for adults
Amazon took the technology industry by surprise today when it announced 'Hey you!', a new digital assistant aimed specifically at the adult home market. Unlike the company's market-leading 'Alexis', which responds to all questions with standard, i...
Read full storyHeatwave in Amsterdam brings 'Gays' in their 'Gay Parade' to boiling point!
It seems that the incredible European heatwave has more consequences than hot, sweaty bodies, people escaping to waterholes, burnt grass, forest fires, lack of booze, tarmac melting, OAPs dropping dead, and our world is nearing an apocalyptic end, NO...
Read full storyNashville Man Revels in Absurdity of His Existence
Kenny Hartwell of Nashville, Tennessee, recently decided to abandon his preconceived notions about what his life should be like and revel in the absurdity of his existence. “It's going well,” said Kenny of his new approach to life. “For instance,...
Read full storyNASA postpones mission to the Sun
Bright thing in the sky, great lighter of days and harbinger of daytime. The Sun is something that most of us see every day (but not every night). NASA have promised for years to send a mission to conquer the fiery body, but have run into problems.
Read full storyJohn L. Way says "hell no" to Colon Pencildick
Denvah, Collie Raddo—Has-been NFL quarterback John L. Way, who now manages to manage the Denvah Broncs, said, “No way will Colon Pencildick play foosball for my team. He stinks.” The has-been quarterback and general manager of the Broncs added, “W...
Read full storySatan Uncomfortable With Overwhelming Success
In a candid one-on-one interview, Satan, the prince of darkness and ruler of all seven circles of Hell, confirmed that he is uncomfortable with the overwhelming success he’s acheived in the realm of mortals. While his influence had always been preval...
Read full storyElon Musk Supports Trump Administration's Plan for a United States Space Force.
Elon Musk today threw his weight behind the Trump administration's plan to form a new branch of the armed forces, the United States Space Force. "The first troop carrier to space will be the TEZLA MACH 25!" declared Musk. "We must be ready, not on...
Read full storyGoogle Spying On Its Users
Google is spying on its users and tracking their movements in a secretive way, according to stuff I read on the internet. So that they can feel safe, and to conceal their whereabouts, Google's users are usually advised to turn off their 'Location History', but this has been found to be insufficient, and that Google are still able to track users' locations, unless the user also disables the opti...
Read full storyNashville Man Sticks Foot in Mouth at Yoga
After hearing all his East Nashville friends rave about the restorative effects of yoga, Trey Mulligan of Nashville, Tennessee, recently decided to check out a class for himself – only to wind up sticking his foot in his mouth. “It was intense,” s...
Read full storyScorpion Was In Man's Shoe
A major incident was narrowly averted in the Battambang commune of Tapon this morning, when a man discovered a horrible, ugly, black scorpion hiding in his shoe! Moys Kenwood, 55, was on his way out to work at around 6:30am, and sat down to put hi...
Read full storyWife's Pregnancy Test Had Man On Tenterhooks
A man who allowed himself to get somewhat 'carried away' during coitus with his wife, had an uncomfortable wait today, whilst she performed a home pregnancy test on herself. The man, who is not normally so irresponsible, is a man who you do not kn...
Read full storyNew Facebook Study Confirms You’re Right About Everything
Earlier today, Facebook released a study that has officially confirmed that you’re right about absolutely everything. The study, which was conducted over the course of your 10+ years on the social media platform, and in no way compromised your privac...
Read full storyDemocRATs want to live large "like Putin"
La La land, USA—In a follow-up to a Gal Lupp poll in which 51% of DemocRATs confessed to preferring socialism to capitalism, respondents to the poll gave their reasons for their preference. “Why work when I can get stuff free?” Freddy the Freeload...
Read full storyWoman Flicked Her Friend's Bean In Full View Of Boss
An office worker at a major financial company in New York, landed herself in hot water this afternoon, after an unsavory incident in the firm's canteen. Marsha Wibblestein, 22, was having lunch with co-workers, Gretchen Hilder, Tammy Papp and Bren...
Read full storyNo More Monkeying Around!
Congressman Ron DeSantis, now the GOP candidate in Florida's upcoming gubernatorial election, has drawn major country-wide consternation for using the word “monkey” when discussing the idea of voting for his new opponent, Tallahassee Mayor Andrew Gil...
Read full storySpunk Stains Cost Man Job
There was more than a touch of regret for one prospective employee this afternoon, when a Pennsylvania man turned up for his job interview with unsightly spunk stains on his clothing. Mark Virile, 26, from Pittsburgh, was attending an interview fo...
Read full storyLots of Nominees for Asshole of the Year!
Every year, the list of nominees grows longer, but this year, there has been unprecedented growth. This year's list includes: * Kim Jong-Un * Vladimir Putin * Bill Cosby * Sarah Huckabee Sanders * Alex Jones Runners-up were Roseanne Barr and Harvey Weinstein. But the actual winner was too late to be added to the nominating ballot, but won by a landslide as a write-in candidate. And...
Read full storyPresident Trump To Be Cryogenically Frozen
President Donald Trump has announced that he will be meeting scientists later today to discuss his new plan for the future which will involve him being cryogenically frozen. Trump, 72, said he 'hatched' the idea recently during the furore which su...
Read full storyNation Forgets Why They Are Outraged
In an almost-unprecedented event, the entirety of the United States seemingly forgot what it was that they were outraged about this morning. The phenomenon hasn’t been experienced since mid-September of 2013, and experts are hard at work to determine...
Read full storyDr. Quigley Answers Gentlemen's Health Questions
Dear Dr Quigley I suffer from recurrent migraines, but my GP always wants me to give a sample of semen whenever I see her, and she insists on helping me. Is this right? S. Perm-Donor, Balham. Lots of patients would love such personal service from their GP. It sounds like she is using the ancient Chinese practice of acuwankture to relieve your headaches and I am sure you feel much better afterw...
Read full storyCISA Certified Mohd Aidil Harith Resigns From BPMB After 5 Year Stint
Mr. Mohd Aidil Harith has resigned from Bank Pembangunan Malaysia Berhad's (BPMB) System Auditor with immediate effect. Aidil has been with the Bank for the past 5 years since May 2013 and has changed BPMB's IT landscape. Aidil is a Certified Info...
Read full storyMorgan Freeman Offers To Be Trump's Voice and Human Avatar
"In an attempt to ease the pain of most normal human beings," Morgan Freeman paused at a news conference in the west wing today, "I have decided to sacrifice the final days of my life to be the voice and visual of Donald Trump." "Now, I know this...
Read full storyResearchers Cut The Cheese in the Tomb of Ptooie Punte
Researchers in the tomb of Ptooie Punte, Mayor of Memphis Eygpt, discovered that the ancient mummy mayor was packing cheese! Indeed, that cheese contains contaminants that may have killed the pharoah and many in his family. "This cheese causes ext...
Read full storyPetty Criminal? Bearing a Grudge? No Luck With the Ladies? Loser? Why Not Join Isis?
Paid content on behalf of Isis Recruitment Services, bomb crater, Syrian Desert. We know how you feel. You've done time in prison for shoplifting or burglary. You hate your job stacking shelves in Lidl or counting chicken nuggets. You've been thrown out of college for failing your accountancy exam. You're an incel, girls don't want to know you and Pornhub is your only outlet. You spend too much...
Read full storyTrump lawyer Rudy Giuliani: Truth isn't truth and Trump isn't Trump
In further evidence of the phantasmagorical world in which President Donald Trump and his minions are living, the US President's lawyer, Rudy Giuliani, has claimed that "truth isn't truth" during a television interview. Mr Giuliani was arguing tha...
Read full storyPresident Trump Resigns After A Job Well Done
Citing his unbelievable success at everything he has ever attempted, Donald Trump resigned from the office of president of the United States. I have achieved all I have set out to accomplish in record time. My ratings were greater than any other...
Read full storyLongwood High School Welcomes Its New Counselor, Mr. Peter Grabber
Longwood High School is proud to welcome its new School Counselor, Mr. Peter Grabber. Mr. Grabber was recently interviewed and hired by District Principal, Mr. Rod Whitestain, and his Assistant Principal, Ms. Oval Peckertracks. He will be replacing the school's previous counselor, Mr. Bendem Overfast. When asked why he chose 'student counseling' as a career path, Mr. Grabber said he was inspir...
Read full storyMan Cut Finger On Door Latch, And Almost Bled To Death
A teacher in a hurry to urinate was left ruing his decision to stop and lock a toilet door today, after he cut his finger on the metal latch, and almost bled to death. Moys Kenwood, 55, was, aside from two receptionists who were working at the fro...
Read full storyRatting Out Trump
When Donald J. Trump tweeted that White House attorney, Don McGahn, wouldn’t: “Rat him out like John Dean” or words to that effect, Trump was confessing that McGahn had some “Rat stuff” to hide about Donald Trump’s criminal behavior. Lots and lot...
Read full storyElderly minister emits giant turd, names it Bernard, enrolls it in Harvard!
The Reverend T. J. McCorkle of Louisburg, North Carolina held a news conference this morning in Raleigh to announce that he had, in the last day, emitted a giant turd. The emission weighed six pounds, seven ounces and McCorkle stated, "It was the...
Read full storyWhole Foods Targets Local Markets with “Enhanced Whole Foods” in NYC and “Holy Foods” in Nashville, TN
It's no secret that Americans love] processed foods or that plenty more love Jesus – and Whole Foods CEO John Mackey recently announced that the company will be tapping into local sentiment by bringing specialized branches to certain markets, beginni...
Read full storyHarried Horticulturist Lacks Time to Stop and Smell Her Own Roses
World-renowned horticulturist Meghan Barlow, pressured on all sides to produce more award-winning zinnias, pentuias, celosia, and other blooms, recently realized that she lacked the time to stop and smell her own roses. "It's a problem," she ackno...
Read full storyFat Bastard Also Had Halitosis
An obese woman who must have weighed around 400lbs also had breath so foul-smelling that many people talking to her would insist upon her observing a buffer, or 'exclusion zone' for their own protection. Angelina Jung, around 38, was a supervisor...
Read full storyNorwich Man Charged With Walking Pig Without a Lead
A man has been charged with walking a pig along a busy city street in Norwich - without a lead. His pleas that "this is Norwich, everyone does it, and, anyway, she's my girlfriend," were dismissed by Norwich Constabulary Special Victims' Unit. No...
Read full storySeven Year Old Wrongly Accused In Game Of Cops & Robbers
Controversy embroiled Franklin Baxter Elementary today when seven-year-old, Lewis Blackman, was wrongly accused in a friendly game of Cops & Robbers during lunch recess. The young boy, who was participating in an adjacent game of Rock, Paper, Sci...
Read full storyAncient Document Sheds Light on Trumps Scottish Ancestry
It has been revealed that an ancient and valuable document has been found in the Outer Hebrides, part of Scotland, relating to POTUS Donald Trump's Scottish ancestry. The delicate parchment was discovered in a previously-unsearched chamber, deep b...
Read full storyGiuliani Says That The Truth is NOT Truth!
Today on Meet The Press, Rudy don't define anything Giuliani, claimed on National television the Truth is not Truth. This is why President Trump has not been willing to submit to questioning by Robert Mueller, for fear that Trump's Truth will not mat...
Read full storyTo Would or Would Not Part 3
......at the end of Part 2! We need you to bring a French underground hero here, just like you wouldn't do in Casablanka." "Now look you my name wouldn't be Rick and I would never be in Casablanca," said Treetrunk. That evening after doing what he said he would not, Treetrunk, Mike Pinch, were on the fishing boat headed out through heavy fog to pick up an unknown French underground hero.
Read full storyFish Cheat Death In Daring Escape Bid
Residents in the Battambang commune of Tapon were on alert for a time this morning, after two fish went on the run from a high-security bucket. Local resident, Sawon Kenwood, had purchased the fish yesterday afternoon, with a view to cooking them,...
Read full storyTrump Declares The Spoof to be "Enemy of the People"
It was the fate of The Spoof to be singled out in a spat with "Leader of the Free World" President Donald Trump. The orange baby has repeatedly criticised the media before and during his presidency and Mr Trump's attacks have drawn criticism from eve...
Read full storyMBE for Ben Stokes for Brave Defence of Gay Friends During Attack
The England cricketer, Ben Stokes, was today put forward for an MBE for his brave defence of a gay couple on a night out in Bristol. Stokes, who was completely sober during the Bristol club-crawl with his mates, first encountered the gay couple af...
Read full storyGoogle Agrees To Adjust Algorithm To Find Positive Trump Stories
Google today agreed to adjust their Algorithm for their search engine to search for positive Trump stories. White house officials have been invited to observe this change and the technical aspects were explained to them, so they could understand.
Read full storyBBC's Great British Menu in Hot Water Over Controversial NHS Menu
One of the BBC's longest running and much loved cookery shows 'Great British Menu' - has been plunged like a pus-covered scalpel - into hot water. The theme of this year's competition, Seventy Years of the NHS has challenged twenty four of the UK's...
Read full storyJumbo Jet Lands On School Playing Field
Disaster was narrowly averted today when the pilot of a British Airways Jumbo Jet mistook a school playing field for an airport runway, and landed his flight on it. The flight, BA296, from Chicago to London Heathrow, should have been 2 miles farth...
Read full storyTrump Outlines His Ransom Plans for the U.S.
Mir-a-lago, FL President Trump has promised to shut down the U.S. Government if his Border Wall doesn't start getting built. Besides building the wall, today Trump added more items to his ransom demands: 1. Every business and home should display h...
Read full storyWFFC reviews collusion blues and tap dance show with Skripal Chorale for the 2018 midterms
WFFC (World Federation of Fed Up Citizens) reps have come forward to evaluate the current roadshow out of Washington: “The Collusion Blues Festival.” This performance has been touring the globe on the theme Trump is controlled by Vladimir Putin, w...
Read full story"I Will Build A Space Force and The Martians Will Pay For It!"
The president signed an executive order diverting all the people's pensions into his new program, whose new motto will be "To Infinity And Beyond", in honor of the projected budget. "And the best part is the Martians are going to pay for it. Trust...
Read full storySteve McClaren Seen Holding A Towel
Steve McClaren, the new Queens Park Rangers team manager, is thought to be urgently 'reconsidering his position', after his side were treated to a 7-1 drubbing by West Bromwich Albion at the Hawthorns, yesterday. The former England boss was seen b...
Read full storyWhere are they now? Comical Ali
We loved him, you loved him, everybody loved him. Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf was comedy gold in his role of the outrageous Iraqi Information Minister during the 2003 Iraq invasion. He earned the nicknames Comical Ali and Baghdad Bob for his wild claims and colourful statements, made while Iraq was being invaded and overrun by American and British forces. His smiling demeanour was a delight to beh...
Read full storyIn final battle of Mexican-American War, Tucker Carlson reclaims tacos for America
On last night's state run media broadcast of Tucker Carlson Tonight, host Tucker Carlson reignited old hostilities that lay dormant for over 150 years. The issue: ownership of the disputed El Territorio de los Tacos. Halfway into a segment with ...
Read full storySex Swap Couple's Romance Due To Typewriter Accident
A 'sex swap' couple in Ontario have revealed how their meeting and subsequent romance were a complete accident, after both suffered from a bang on the head at work. Leslie Jones, 48, a bricklayer at the Straight-Up Building Company in the city, wa...
Read full storyRocker Plays to Standing Room Only Crowd in Bathroom at Fenway Park
Aging rocker Mick Elliott says he loves playing small halls and theaters these days rather than large arenas and stadiums. It’s clearly a lie he tells himself because he could never fill up an arena if he paid people to attend. “You couldn’t pay m...
Read full storyCIA Plotting Overthrow of Trump?
Anonymous and usually unreliable sources in the intelligence community, who are on rare occasion somewhat right, have told The Spoof that high ranking officials in the Central Intelligence Agency have a contingency plan to replace President Donald J.
Read full storySuspiciously Striped Zebra At Egyptian Zoo
An Egyptian student has accused a zoo in Egypt of painting a donkey with black stripes in order to make it look like a zebra. The student's photograph of the suspicious looking zebra, named Muffin, has been examined by several experts who claim th...
Read full storyIran Retaliates: Dyspeptic Camel Befouls Trump’s Bed
BILLINGSGATE POST: As promised, the curse Iran President Hassan Rouhani levied on President Trump has been carried out. Inexplicably, a dyspeptic camel found its way past White House Secret Service Agents, and, in a show of extraordinary chutzpah,...
Read full storyPresident Trump Bans Spoof Stories About Himself
US President Donald Trump, has addressed the US press corps at the White House this afternoon, and has placed a full and complete ban on ALL spoof stories about himself, especially ones that portray him in a bad light. Mr Trump claims he tired of...
Read full storyTrump Says He'll Retire From Politics When He's 100
President Donald Trump has said he will retire from politics 'completely', when he reaches the age of 100. He told reporters at the White House that, though he believes he has much to give, there is also much he has to receive, and he fully intend...
Read full storyUnclear on the Concept, Trump Offers to Host Next Year's World Cup
Mar-A-Lago-Lago, FL Donald Trump tweeted that he didn't get to watch the World Cup this year because he was too busy being President and helping out on Fox and Friends. Trump then tweeted that he loves football and always cheers whenever the tea...
Read full storyNashville Narcissist Finally Figures Out Where His Father Utterly Failed Him
After years of fending off complaints about his self-centeredness, grandiosity and extreme narcissism, Trent Lockwood of Nashville, Tennessee, finally figured out that any emotional shortcoming on his part was due to the fact that, as a young boy, hi...
Read full storyMonkey Dust Hits Stoke School in Daytrip Disaster
Pupils at a local Stoke-on-Trent High School were looking forward to a long-arranged day trip to a popular animal centre today, but disaster struck soon after they arrived. The schoolchildren, aged 11 to 16, were visiting the local "Monkey Forest...
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