The Reverend T. J. McCorkle of Louisburg, North Carolina held a news conference this morning in Raleigh to announce that he had, in the last day, emitted a giant turd.
The emission weighed six pounds, seven ounces and McCorkle stated, "It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life," he hesitated and added with a slight smile, "both figuratively and literally...if you catch my drift!"
Most of the journalists in the room, knowing McCorkle from previous times, laughed nervously.
McCorkle, who was the founder and developer of the first NC Fart Farms is well known among local residents and is also the owner of Moose, the famous "gaseous hero dog" a fixture in the Obama administration and who also was in the Trump administration until he was fired because of an accusation that he had "cold nosed" Andrea Merkel at a EU summit.
It was later proven to be false, however the WH refused to tell who was the real culprit.
McCorkle stated that Bernard, the turd, was doing well and would have a great future.
"He is from my loins, a true gift from the almighty and his future is limitless. Harvard has enthusiastically accepted him into it's law school and Anna Mae and I couldn't be more proud!"
He paused and then gestured, hands held high...
"Who knows, one day Bernard may be the second big turd in history to become the President of the United States of America!!!"
