Elvis Presley Sightings Suggest He May Still Be Alive

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 14 August 2018

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Elvis 'sightings' in the last 6 minutes

The King is Dead!

Or is he?

The death of Elvis Presley, the King of Rock and Roll, on 16 August 1977, shook the world to its very foundations, and set in motion a concerted effort by heartbroken fans to prove that it was all a hoax, and that he was still alive.

The Elvis Hunters, a band of committed Presley 'diehards', are organised. They operate in 37 US cities, and have branches in 13 other countries around the world. They act as contact points for people who believe they have 'seen' Elvis, logging all information, and carrying out their own independent investigations. So far, this year, there have been more than 900 sightings worldwide. The Hunters say that, one of these days, Elvis will be found.

Indeed, only last week, an 81-year-old man with poor eyesight in Nashville, reported to his local EH branch that he had spotted the King standing outside a store in the city. Two Hunters raced to the scene, only to discover a lifelike plastic model of Elvis standing outside a secondhand music shop. They regularly go to supermarkets, sports stadiums and Elvis conventions, certain they will, one day, bring the King 'back to life'.

Sightings have been made all across the globe, and on each and every continent, with nearly 200 in China alone. An Elvis Lookalike event in Bridlington, England recently, aroused the hungry attentions of the Hunters, but again, blanks were drawn, when none of the 'doubles' looked remotely like Elvis.

It's not clear why the Elvis Hunters think the King of Rock and Roll would have wanted to have faked his own death, and to have remained at large in the world for 41 years, but I just report the news - I don't make it up.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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