Written by Al N.

Sunday, 26 August 2018

image for David Pecker of the National Enquirer Rose to the Occasion For Trump Many Times
The President insists it doesn't bother him that Pecker has immunity, and has been wearing his "happy face" all

The Mueller Investigation recently gave immunity to Trump's "friend" David Pecker regarding testifying about the President's expenses.

When Trump needed Pecker to kill a story, Pecker would rise to the occasion. He would buy negative stories about Trump, supposedly for the National Enquirer, and bury them in his safe.

"I know that there were a lot of stories about Trump's indiscretions because that Pecker kept buying bigger and bigger safes" said this guy called Chaz who we met down the local bus station and who told us he was a former employee.

"Everybody that worked at the Enquirer thought that Pecker pulled a lot of boners with Trump. We thought he was collecting all the dirt on the President to give him super blackmail material, because we couldn't imagine anyone actually liking Trump," said Chaz, "but that's not all there was to Pecker's boners..."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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