There were 233 spoof news stories published in April 2022. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Marjorie Taylor Greene Insists The Nude Photos of Her Are of Some Fat-Ass Pole Dancer
BALTIMORE - (Satire News) - A reporter with The Daily Dirt caught up with Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene, who was in Baltimore getting an old MAGA tattoo lasered off her right butt cheek. DD's Stormy Coin asked MTG about the naked photos that appear…
Read full storyThe Sexy LPGA Golfer Paige Spiranac Turns Down $4 Million To Pose Totally Naked In a European Men's Magazine
PARIS, France - (Sports Satire) - One of the most beautiful female atletes in the history of female athletes, has just turned down a very, very lucrative offer to pose in her birthday suit for a leading men's adult magazine. Paige Spiranac was off…
Read full storyDanica Patrick Explains The Nude Photos of Her And Aaron Rodgers
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - NASCAR princess Danica Patrick recently sat down with Fajita San Guacamole with Hollywood Innuendo at The Intoxicated Iguana Bar in New York City. The two have known each other ever since Danica was in high school…
Read full storyBen and Jerry's Latest Ice Cream Flavor Is Will Smith Evil Blackberry Surprise
FROZEN FIDDLE, Vermont - (Satire News) - The makers of Ben and Jerry Ice Cream have developed over 100 different ice cream names including Tasty Tango Mango Durango, Sweet Caroline Delight, and Thighlicious Daisy Duke Supreme. The ice cream giant…
Read full storyPutin Invaded Ukraine for "Sumthin’ To Do"
A Russian insider who cannot be named has told this reporter that Vladimir Putin has only invaded Ukraine “for something to do while waiting for Trump to come back.” The Russian mole hinted that there exists a deep bromance between the two fascis…
Read full storyWeather Can't Make up it's mind
The weather can't make up its mind, say wags on Social Media. Hilariously funny people are complaining about the weather on Twitter again, news headlines reveal. Daily Mail Intern Tracy Gravy was given the onerous task of finding witty and pith…
Read full storyAfghanistan's Taliban Government Tells Al-Qaeda, Isis, and Hezbollah To Get The Hell Out of Dodge
KABUL, Afghanistan - (World Satire) - The Taliban president of Afghanistan, Abu Taboo Fashu, has issued a stern warning to the fucking terrorist groups that if they have any sense at all they will leave his country; and pronto, as they say in Costa R…
Read full storyThe Tits Tree Is Now Tennessee's Number One Tourist Attraction
STALE BISCUIT, Tennessee - (Satire News) - The Volunteer State was the 16th state admitted into the union back on Thursday, June 1, 1796, at 2:15 am. The state is mainly noted for country music, Daisy Duke short shorts-clad hot, sexy babes, and mo…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Explains That Nakedness and Nudity Are Two Different Things
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene, who is hated by much more people than the likes of Bill Cosby, Tucker Carlson, Hitler, Will Smith, and Tennessee Senator Marsha "Wrinkled Butt" Blackburn recently spoke with Hollywood H…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Reveals Her Brand New Pussy Tattoo
BALTIMORE, Maryland - (Satire News) - Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene was in Baltimore for an appointment with her gynecologist. Boom Boom News has learned that MTG has an ingrown nipple that she is getting looked at (the left one). BBN's Hacienda…
Read full storyThe New Rockettes Policy Prohibits Pubic Hair
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - The All-American precision dance group is known all over the world from Japan to Bolivia and from Scotland to Upper Zamgalar. They perform at The Radio City Music Hall, where the inside temperature must always be se…
Read full storySoros = soroS: The Looking Glass War
BILLINGSGATE POST: If you have ever wondered who is calling the shots for President Joe Biden, look no further. Billionaire George Soros, a man with no country, is the defacto leader of our country. Along with Barack Obama’s former puppeteer, Valeri…
Read full storyThe World's Most Famous Matador, El Gazpacho, Is Being Courted By Taco Bell
CHICAGO - (Sports Satire) - The American Foodie News Agency is reporting that the world's greatest matador Joaquin Beauregard Gazpacho is being considered to become the spokesperson for Taco Bell. Barcelona bullfighter "El Gazpacho" is perhaps one…
Read full storyHollywood Is Courting Aaron Rodgers To Be The Next James Bond
HOLLYWOOD - (Sports Satire) - Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers is thrilled that Tinsel Town is looking at him to replace Daniel Craig, as the new James Bond, agent 007. Rodgers, the ex-boyfriend of NASCAR sweetheart Danica Patrick, say…
Read full storyTiger Woods Is Back, And Trump Thinks, "Me too?"
Tiger Woods says he's going after another green jacket at the Master's Championship in Augusta, Georgia. Five green jackets weren't enough; he wanted an even half-dozen. He loves the sport and is welcome back after a harrowing automobile accident in…
Read full storyRon DeSantis Working Out at the Don't Say Gay Gym
I tried a new gym the other day and saw Ron DeSantis on the bench press. I went up and asked if he was a member, and after staring at my crotch for a solid thirty seconds, he said, “Yeah, I pump. I pump hard. See my lats and delts and pecs? T…
Read full storyA Russian - Ukrainian War Update: A Cambodian PT Boat Sinks a Russian Destroyer
SOMEWHERE IN THE BLACK SEA - (World Satire) - The tide of the RUW (The Russian - Ukrainian War) is turning as a PT boat of the Cambodian navy (The CPTB-83) has just sunk the Russian destroyer, (The RSS Mrs. Joseph Stalin). The Ukraine Voice report…
Read full storyPutin Lets It Slip That He Tells His Girlfriend Everything About The Russian-Ukranian War
MOSCOW - (Satire News) - President Putin, has just shown that he is not the sharpest knife in the kitchen drawer with his latest slip of the tongue. The crazed, power-hungry, evil evilpabob, as VP Kamala Harris has pegged him, has just revealed (a…
Read full storyMichael Jackson Saves The Day
Thanks to top-notch CGI and advanced Deep Fake technology, Michael Jackson is back! Starring in his own hot new TV series with his best buddy, Macaulay Culkin! Mick J. and his boy sidekick, Mack Collie, are "Mick 'n Mack", superheroes! With…
Read full storyPoland In An Act of Solidarity is Sending Ukraine 2 Tons of Polish Sausages
WARSAW, Poland – (World Satire) – The president of Poland has made it abundantly clear that his country does not fear Putin’s Russian military superiority one fucking iota. Polish President Andrzej Duda (pronounced: DOO-DA) told a group of Europea…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Is Thinking of Getting Circumcised
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - BuzzFuzz has just learned that Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene (aka The Blonde Scarecrow) is considering getting circumcised. According to BuzzFuzz junior reporter Sonora Cahoots, MTG recently read an article about…
Read full storyCanada Is Sending The Pride of The Canadian Navy, The CS Justin Bieber, To Ukraine
OTTAWA, Canada - (Satire News) - The Canadian government has just sent their number one warship, the CS Justin Bieber to Ukraine to help in the war effort against the damn, invading Putin military. Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, stated…
Read full storyHarry McGuire admits to 'occasional bouts of nudity'
England and Manchester United defender, Harry McGuire, last night told a newspaper that he has been completely naked on a number of occasions and has even been involved in sordid bouts of nudity with fellow players and current England boss, Gareth So…
Read full storyKFC Discontinues Their Seagull Tenders Due To A Huge Customer Backlash
LOUISVILLE, Kentucky - (Satire News) - KFC has given in to the demands of it's patrons and effective immediately it will be discontinuing it's latest menu item, the Seagull Tenders. KFC heard it loud and clear that people do not want to eat a bird…
Read full storyA Obese Woman From Seattle Swallows 119 Diet Pills and Loses 16 Pounds In 45 Minutes
SEATTLE - (Satire News) - All of her life, Dora Flora Hogwood, has battled fatness. When she was born she was so huge, that her mom's screams could be heard four blocks from the hospital's delivery room. At birth, little Dora tipped the scales at…
Read full storyBungling Russians Take Blame for Military Mishaps
The Russian invasion of the Ukraine might be described as a continuing series of military mishaps. First their tanks got stuck in the mud, then they abandoned an entire column of tanks. They started abandoning Kyev, which was supposed to be their big…
Read full storySan Francisco To Open The World's First "All Gay" Mickey D's" Fast Food Restaurant
SAN FRANCISCO - (Satire News) - The American Foodie News Agency has just announced that "Fog City" will be opening up the world's first "Gay and Lesbian Only" fast food eatery. An executive for Mickey D's, Bruce P. Swishowitz, 34, said that the fr…
Read full storyNASA Reports That The New Planet Labia Majora Is Made Up of 43% Gold!
HOUSTON - (Satire News) - NASA has just made an amazing announcement. Planet experts have revealed that tests show that Labia Majora (the planet) is made up of 43% gold. A NASA spokesperson stated that the discovery was made after the US planet ro…
Read full storyIf Texas Governor Greg Abbott Worked Making Burgers At McDonald's His Hate-Filled Ass Would Have Been Fired The First Day
AUSTIN, Texas - (Satire News) - iNews has reported that Texas governor Gregg "The Hick Dick" Abbott is about as worthless as a breeding bull with no ding dong. The poor excuse for a human is so stupid that his own mother took him to a fire station…
Read full storyAaron Rodgers Loves How Danica Patrick Can Quickly Transform Herself Into a Human Coffee Table
GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Sports Satire) - Aaron Rodgers recently told Carolina Chipotle, with Bedroom Pillow Talk that he is one of the luckiest guys in the entire world. "The Allstate Kid" and super star quarterback for the Green Bay Packers told…
Read full storyElon Musk buys The Spoof for under $500
Billionaire attention-seeking arsehole Elon Musk has offered to buy The Spoof website for $420, a reference to Musk's supposed love of marijuana. "I like weed because it's cool," said Musk. "And I'm cool." His real name is Leroy Twatt, but he…
Read full storyMemphis Police Catch Donald Trump Dressed As Camilla Parker Bowles Inside A Victoria's Secret Lingerie Shop
MEMPHIS, Tennessee - (Satire News) - The Omnium Gatherum News Agency has just broken the story that the Trumptard, (aka The Racist Loser), was apprehended inside a Victoria's Secret store. Melania's husband was caught wearing a turquoise dress, a…
Read full storyDonald Trump Says He’s The Most Honest Man That God Ever Created
The most honest man God ever created? More honorable than Jesus, Gandhi or Buddha? Holy tamale! Even God must be ticked! Or triple pissed! At a Saturday night rally in Selma, North Carolina, Donald Trump first announced to his audience, “I’ve…
Read full storyPresident Putin Is Suffering From Tonsilitis, Laryngitis, Diarrhea, Syphirea, and Fucking Guilt
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - According to The Alpha Beta News Agency, Russian president Vladimir Nikita Putin, is now the most hateful, despicable, evil, world leader in the world. Reporter Mimosa Sabrosa, with ABNA, said that even 89% of Pu…
Read full storyMob Boss In The White House?
Mob boss in the White House? No, not Joe Biden, but the loser Biden booted out of the White House: Donald Trump. Trump, who is attempting to emulate pal Vladimir Putin (a guy getting his nuts squashed by a hammer called Ukraine), is back to his lock…
Read full storyCuddles the Monkey
News has reached us from the home of retired puppets that Cuddles the Moneky is in a bad way. Cuddles, famed sidekick of ventriloquist Keith Harris, and erstwhile enemy of comedy duck Orville is said to be looking back on his halcyon days as a bel…
Read full storyJoe Manchin, AKA The Democrat Traitor, Assaulted By Three Second Graders At A McDonalds
SHEEP SHIT, West Virginia - (Satire News) - Two of the most hated politicians in the US are Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia, and Joe Manchin of West Virginia. Tapioca Swizzle, reporter with Vox Populi has stated that if meaness, stupidity, and h…
Read full storyThe California State Senate Votes To Keep Trump Off The Presidential Ballot In 2024
SACRAMENTO, California - (Satire News) - After a spirited debate the state senate has voted 291-7 to keep Trump's name off the 2024 presidential election. Sen. Tammy P. Potmeister, 72, [D-Oxnard] perhaps said it best, when she told Boom Boom News…
Read full storyBritain To Change The Colors of Its Flag
LONDON - (Satire News) Prime Minister Boris Johnson has just informed the people of Great Britain that parliament has voted to change the colors of the English flag. The red, white, and blue color scheme was first implemented back on Wednesday, Se…
Read full storyBen and Jerry's Decides To Discontinue It's Trumptard Orange Marmalade Ice Cream Flavor
FROZEN FIDDLE, Vermont - (Satire News) - In a move that is being hailed by the majority of ice cream buyers in America, Ben and Jerry's has just announced that they will be taking their Trumptard Orange Marmalade off of the market. This particular…
Read full storyAaron Rodgers Reveals That He Came Very, Very Close To Becoming a Dallas Cowboy
GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Sports Satire) - Sports writer Tango Brisket with Sports Territory Magazine recently spoke with Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers at the Giggling Guacamole Restaurant in downtown Green Bay. Brisket asked him about…
Read full storyThe Detroit Lions Have Just Signed Colin Kaepernick
DETROIT - (Sports Satire) - There is lots of joy in Mudville today; ah wrong sport, let's make that Motown. The Detroit Lions die-hard fans are thrilled after team owner Shelia Firestone Ford Hamp, agrees to sign former San Francisco 49ers quarter…
Read full storyMcDonalds Is Now Serving Diet Big Macs
CICERO, Illinois - (Satire News) - The McDonalds Corporation has always listened to the buying public. In a move that will most assuredly increase Mickey D's burger sales, the big burger giant is now selling Diet Big Macs. The new burger only h…
Read full storyMcDonald's New Guacamole McMuffin Is Selling Like Hot Cakes
CHICAGO - (Business Satire) - The McDonalds Corporation has just announced that their latest menu item is having great success all over the world. A spokeswoman for Mickey D's, Wanda Sue Simon, who recently divorced her husband of 29 years, stated…
Read full storyDonald "The Trumptard" Trump Is Courting Marjorie Taylor Greene To Be His 2024 Presidential Campaign Manager
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) - The word on the streets of Palm Beach, Florida is that the racist, 30,000 lies-spewing, pussy grabber, aka Donaldo Jonathan Erasmus Trump wants to hire Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene to be his 2024 presidential cam…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Is Selling Her Used Condom Collection
PRICKLY PEAR, Arizona - (Satire News) - According to Tittle Tattle Tonight, the most hated bitch in the District of Columbia, Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene has just put her used condom collection on eBay. MTG, says that she was told that she could…
Read full storyArizona Is Considering Selling The Grand Canyon To China
PHOENIX - (Satire News) - The News Blues News Agency has just broken the story that a group of investors from Shanghai, China, are interested in purchasing the Grand Canyon. The Group, which calls itself, Fortune Cookie, Inc., has made Gov. Doug D…
Read full storySing Sing Prison Officials Say That Donald Trump's Cell Is Ready
OSSINING, New York - (Satire News) - Officials of Sing Sing Prison have informed the news media that they have Trump's prison cell ready for the soon-to-be-inmate. Prison spokesperson Milo F. Clutterbuck, 49, said that he wants the public to know…
Read full storyThe World Will Soon Be Underwater
And not soon enough! In coming years, scientists report that sea levels will rise just enough to drown every city on Earth that’s close to a major waterway. Finally, all those land-locked countries will become prime real estate! Hello, Chad,…
Read full storyThe New York Yankees Are Replacing Their Popular Pinstriped Uniforms With Plain Uniforms
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) - The New York Yankees are the only team in Major League Baseball that wear the very distinctive pinstriped uniforms. The uniforms were first introduced in 1912, when the wife of one of their most popular New York Y…
Read full storyThe World Federation Alliance Plans To Charge Russian President Putin With War Crimes
BERN, Switzerland – (Satire News) – Word coming out of the Chocolate Capital of the World says that the WFA (the World Federation Alliance), has decided to charge President Putin, the Kremlin, and hundreds of Russian oligarchs with war crimes. A s…
Read full storyDonald Trump Insists That He Is Not A Card-Carrying Member of The Ku Klux Klan
BOSTON - (Satire News) - The twice-impeached one term resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. aka "Trump The Racist Tax-Evader" is reportedly fit-to-be-tied after reading in the supermarket tabloid, Whoa Today, that he is a charter member of the KKK. T…
Read full storySweden Reports That They Have The Whitest White People In The World
STOCKHOLM, Sweden - (World Satire) - Nordic News reports that it took a recent poll and the results clearly showed that the citizens of Sweden are the whitest white people in the entire world. They even surpass the Icelandic people, many of which…
Read full storyFurries to be barred from the UK Olympic team
The UK government have ordered that no "furries" will be allowed to compete in the Olympic team, or in any athletic events at national level. The move follows a controversial event where Eck Wine, 52, came fifth in the Chaffinch St Cock marathon whil…
Read full storyThings I Will Miss About No Longer Having to Wear A Mask
I can no longer use it to hide that I have forgotten to shave this morning. It will no longer cover up my smirk at someone’s stupid comment. The extra warmth it gives my jaw on those below freezing days. It will no longer cover up my bad br…
Read full storyPutin Has Just Surpassed Hitler, Stalin, Hirohito, and Trump As The Most Evil SOB In History
CHICAGO - (Satire News) - Tabloid Today has just announced that Russian President Vladimir "The Human Douche Bag" Putin has just passed four of the most evil pieces-of-shit assholes in history. The publication's senior writer Papaya Bamboo, stated…
Read full storyRestaurant solves energy crisis
Ben Scrapin of the Stinken Toes restaurant held a press conference today as the gas company disconnected the restaurant from the gas line. The savings in gas utilities will be donated to shelters that feed the homeless, according to Mr. Scrapin.
Read full storyAll of Will Smith's Bobblehead Dolls Have Been Taken Off The Market and Destroyed
CHICAGO - (Satire News) - The Hasbrutha Toy Co. has just taken every Will Smith Bobblehead Doll off the market and burned them. A spokesperson for the giant toy company, which yearly produces over 16.3 million bobblehead dolls, said that it refuse…
Read full storyThe LPGA's Transgender Golfer Is Now The Spokeswoman For Joan-of-Arc Glow-in-The-Dark Pantiliners
OKLAHOMA CITY - (Sports Satire) - LPGA golfer Margie Muskatelli, has quickly become one of the world's most famous transgendered athletes. Musky, as sports reporters have pegged her, says that she is excited to have been chosen to be the new spoke…
Read full storyTravel Websites Now Offer Smuggling Tickets
London, UK - Always looking to gain the upper edge on the competition, some travel booking websites are now offering tickets for refugees to be smuggled to the destination of their choice. Indeed, we checked several top name travel sites and found…
Read full storyThe Unbelievably Amazing Reason Why One Of American Idol's Favorite Female Singers Was Disqualified
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - In a shocking revelation, BuzzFuzz is reporting that one of this year's favoritie American Idol singers has just been disqualified from the show. AI host Ryan Seacrest told reporter Taffeta Kixx that private investigato…
Read full storyI took nude photos of several nude photos, claims local man
A 54-year-old man from Whitechapel in East London has told a local newspaper that he recently took a number of saucy nude photographs of some nude photographs while in the nude himself. Toby Dell, a forklift truck engineer, told The East London Ga…
Read full storyTaxidermist To The Stars: He Stuffed And Mounted President Biden
BILLINGSGATE POST: Until now, all the efforts of man to restore the skin of his fellow creature to its natural form and beauty, have proved fruitless. Previous attempts by taxidermists to stuff and mount a member of his own specie have only produced…
Read full storyA Female Wrestler Wants To Wrestle Trump - If He Wins She'll Pay Him $1 Million - If She Wins He'll Leave The US For Good
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - World Wrestling Federation wrestler Mona Nectarview, who wrestles under the name "The Krazy Krusher," has just made an offer to the Trumptard. Mona, who has been wrestling professionally ever since she was 14-year…
Read full storyEaster Bunny Rescues The President
BILLINGSGATE POST: Who’s calling the shots? President Biden seemingly was in full control of the White House’s Easter egg roll when he was interrupted by none other than the Easter Bunny. No. It wasn’t really an Easter Bunny. It was a staffer dre…
Read full storyAlexa Banned From Discussing Transgenders
In an exclusive interview with this reporter today, "Alexa" revealed that she/he/it is sexless and has no gender. This came after an innocent question from me asking what state had recently enacted a law prohibiting transgenders from competing in…
Read full storyBob Baffert's Transgendered Race Horse Is The Odds-On Favorite To Win The Kentucky Derby
LOUISVILLE, Kentucky - (Sports Satire) - The 148th running of the "Run For The Roses" as the Kentucky Derby is called will have a field of 24 horses, by far the most thoroughbreds to race at Churchill Downs. Two of the horses are from China, one i…
Read full storyOther Ministries Joe Is Considering
Ministry of Awesomeness Ministry of Doubleplusungood Ministry of Ministry (ROCK ON!) Ministry of We’re Not Spying On You We Swear Ministry of Hollywood Stars Are Better Than You Ministry of Keepin’ It Real Ministry of Fuck All Mi…
Read full storyThe Pride of Russia's Military, The 106th Russian Roulette Regiment, Is Decimated By a Regiment of Ukrainian Volunteers
POLTERGIEST, Ukraine - (World Satire) - Russia's free news agency, Vodkavich, is reporting that a group made up of Ukrainian voluteers soundly defeated the pride of Putin's army, the 106th Russian Roulette Regiment. Vodkavich noted that the entire…
Read full storyShanghai Suicides Not Allowed Without State Approval
Under severe lock-down, Chinese people in Shanghai are pissed off and doing the only thing they can do to protest against an unjust government: they are killing themselves in record numbers! One Chinese man about to hang himself said, “We’re starv…
Read full storyBiscuit game to be banned from House of Commons
For centuries, the British Houses of Parliament have echoed to the fevered fapping noises of pistoning palms. It is a parliamentary procedure little known to the outside world as it is usually conducted under great secrecy, yet its days are now numbe…
Read full storyHollywood’s Sexy New Line of Fascism
Not only did Donald Trump look like a celebrity when he was president, he was a celebrity! Now, dictators around the world have been seduced by The Donald. (Others want to use the definite article when referring to themselves as well: The Putin,…
Read full storyThe St. Louis Cardinals and The New York Mets Brawl After a Mets Batter is Hit in The Head With Sunflower Seeds
ST. LOUIS - (Sports Satire) - The New York Mets organization has filed a written complaint stating three different Cardinal pitchers are purposely throwing sunflower seed-laden balls at opposing batters. Sports Territory Magazine writer Tango Bris…
Read full storyHow Trump Groomed Florida Gov. DeSantis
A leaked video selfie from the Trump Presidential Compound at Mar-a-Lago reveals how much pain Donald John Trump feels over his complex and evolving relationship with Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis. He details every step of their political alliance in the…
Read full storyThe Pope Warns Putin That If He Uses Nukes Against Ukraine - He'll Demand That All of The World's Nations Attack Russia
THE VATICAN - (Satire News) - The Pope usually does not ever interfere in world politics, as he prefers to leave it to the world leaders, many of whom are nothing more than egotistic, arrogant, warmongering assholes (i.e. Putin, Kim Jong-un, Chang Fu…
Read full storyFlorida Republicans Grooming Children for Tax Hikes
Opponents of a Republican assault on the Disney Company, the largest employer in the Sunshine State, warn the legislation is grooming children to pay higher taxes. “Florida Republicans got mad at Disney, and took revenge because the mouse roared i…
Read full storyTrump Admits That His Health Issues Will Prevent Him From Running In 2024
MAR-A-LAGO - (Satire News) - The man who once said he would be president in 2024 has now changed his tune, as they say in the music world. Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump, recently told GOPicky Magazine reporter Tabitha Tula Wishywater, that his doc…
Read full storySarah Ferguson Admits That She Has Been Cheating On Boyfriend Piers Morgan
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - The Scuttlebutt Review has just made it known that the Duchess of York has just admitted that yes, she has been cheating on her Brit boyfriend and Queen Elizabeth asskisser Piers Morgan. Sarah Ferguson admitted to r…
Read full storyRudy Giuliani Spotted In Central Park Feeding The Ducks While Totally Naked
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - Well everyone knew that it was just a matter of time before one of Trump's favorite confidantes would go totally and completely bat shit crazy. The Daily Drama is reporting that the man who is known as one of the ug…
Read full storyBezos-Musk, Inc. Wants To Purchase The New Planet Labia Majora
AUSTIN - (Satire News) - Word coming from deep in the heart of Texas, is that the biggest company in the entire world, Bezos-Musk, Inc., is in the process of purchasing the newly discovered planet, Labia Majora. Contrary to what many uniformed peo…
Read full storyRepublican Congressman Madison Cawthorn Says He's Not A Cross Dresser, He's Just a Transvestite
VENUS FLYTRAP, North Carolina - (Satire News) - The 26-year-old congressman from North Carolina, Madison Cawthorn, says that he was raised in a strict Baptoprescopalian home, and as a result he is as straight as a pink flamingo's legs. Cawthorn, w…
Read full storyDonald Trump Is Having His Tongue Circumsized
CHICAGO - (Satire News) - The Trumptard's personal physician, Dr. Yang Fu Fi, has just remarked that his long time friend, patient, and yarn spinner, Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump is going to have his tongue circumsized. Dr. Fu Fi, who has tried a…
Read full storyIs Stacey Abrams ___ing Donald Trump?
Stacey Abrams is the Democratic candidate for governor of Georgia, and one would hope that she has enough class, taste, and sense to not get involved in any way with Donald Trump. Something, however, may be going on between Abrams and Trump; un…
Read full storyHooker Wear ... by Melania
Melania Trump has revealed her upcoming line of “Hooker Wear”, for the professional and distinguished whore in you! Look like a high-priced call-girl when you’re out on the town, seeing a show, going to dinner with a “client”, or just lounging ar…
Read full storyPiers Morgan Is Devasted After Girlfriend Sarah Ferguson Dumps His Ass!
LONDON - (UK Satire) - Tickety Boo News is reporting that Piers Morgan is the unhappiest man in the entire UK. Morgan's long-time girl, Sarah Ferguson, reportedly dumped him via a text message. In the text the Duchess of York told the Mouth of…
Read full storyThe Tijuana Toros Are The Champions of The Mexican Basketball Association (MBA)
MEXICO CITY - (Sports Satire) - The Sports Bet Gazette (Mexico) has just stated that the new champions of the Mexican Basketball Association (MBA) are the Tijuana Toros. The Toros are coached by former NBA legend Woody "The Telephone Pole" Washing…
Read full storyIf Indicted, Convicted, Jailed, Will Trump's Portrait Still Hang In White House?
The above headline has been whispered and gossiped about in government offices of protocol and ethics. What to do? And also, if convicted, would Donald Trump be eligible for Social Security since he would have been convicted of criminal behavior w…
Read full storyHotline Between Biden And Putin Not Smoking
BILLINGSGATE POST: On August 30, 1963, John F. Kennedy became the first U.S. president to have a direct phone line to the Kremlin in Moscow. The “hotline” was designed to facilitate communication between the president and Soviet premier so that one…
Read full storyAlabama Has Just Named Donald Trump As 2022's Comeback Kid
MONTGOMERY, Alabama - (Satire News) - There is no state in the nation where the Trumptard is revered more than in Alabama. He is loved more by Alabamians than Idahoans love potatoes, residents of Maine love maple syrup, and Las Vegasers love douch…
Read full storyOld Friend Trudeau
Prime Minister, Justin Trudeau, and his cabinet have officially declared that Russia is engaged in genocide against Ukraine. When asked about the Chinese genocide of the Uyghur people, Trudeau said, “Duuuuuuuuuh ... nope, it’s OK.” Shortly aft…
Read full storyThe Reason Why The Golden State Warriors and The Denver Nuggets Got Into a Knock-Down Drag-Out Brawl
OAKLAND, California - (Sports Satire) - Chase Center, the home of the Golden State Warriors, was the scene of an out-of-control brawl that lasted for seven minutes and four seconds. The brouhaha began when arena employees reported that there would…
Read full storyVladimir Putin Has Just Purchased 16 Naked Photos of Jennifer Lopez
MOSCOW - (Satire News) - The Kremlin Voice has verified that Vladimir Putin the Evil, has in fact bought 16 nude photos of the singer, dancer, actress Jennifer Lopez. Putin told a close aide that he has always had the hots for the hot Latina babe,…
Read full storyDonald Trump Is Infatuated With Jada Pinkett Smith - He Says That Older Women With Crew Cuts Are Sexy
MAR-a-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) - Donald Trump has never been noted for being the sharpest tool in the tool box, or the brightest bulb on the make-up mirror, or the least racist asshole in a bevy of racist assholes. And now the goofy Trumptard…
Read full storyThe Texas Ranger Foil A Plot To Kidnap Texas Governor Greg Abbott
AUSTIN - (Satire News) - The state's law enforcement agency has just thwarted a plot that would have had the most hated governor in the history of hateful governors kidnapped. Texas Rangers spokesperson Nanette Peggy Tullavinny, 42, reported that…
Read full storyJada Pinkett Smith The Ditzy Brat Is Banned From The Oscars
LOS ANGELES - (Satire News) - Reports coming out of Tinsel Town state that the Motion Picture Academy of The Oscars has just hit Jada Pinkett Smith, the wife of the "Fucking Ambusher," aka Will Smith with a lifetime ban. A spokeswoman for the Acad…
Read full storyWould You Buy A Pound Of Baloney From Kevin McCarthy?
Would you buy a pound of baloney from Kevin McCarthy? No. Why the heck not? Do you think maybe, he might switch the baloney and instead sell you a pound of cat food? No way the sale would be three pounds of oven-baked, freshly roasted turkey.
Read full storyTwo Ukrainian Fighter Jets Sink The Pride of The Russian Navy, The RS Mikhail Baryshnikov
ON THE HIGH SEAS - (World News) - The Ukraine News Agency (UNA) reports that the pride of Putin's navy, The RS Mikhail Baryshnikov, has been sunk. The powerful warship, was sunk when it was hit by a total of 13 missiles fired from two Ukrainian fi…
Read full storyDid Anyone Count The White House Silver After Donald Trump Left?
Oh, dear! Who would have guessed? After Donald Trump was voted out of the office and sent back down south to Florida, he neglected to hand over to the State Department an accounting of all of the foreign gifts he may have received while in the White…
Read full storyRishi Sunak doesn't know what taxes are
Chancellor Rishi Sunak has revealed that despite managing the finances of the UK, he doesn't actually know what taxes are. When asked by a journalist at a press conference, he said, "Is that what you call it? The money that all those people give to t…
Read full storyAll of the world's sins go into Cadbury's Creme Eggs, says the Devil
A closely kept secret has been unveiled by a man who should know, Lucifer himself. Speaking to us earlier, Lucifer who now calls himself Derek said 'For years I have been putting every sin everyone has committed into Cadbury's Creme Eggs. That is…
Read full storySharon Osbourne Files For Divorce From Her Rockin' Rickety Roller Husband Ozzy Osbourne
MALIBU BEACH - (Satire News) - The singer known as "The Prince of Darkness" has just received divorce papers from his wife of 40 years, Sharon "The Boss" Osbourne. Ozzy Osbourne was born Johnny Mikey Billy Osbourne in England 73 years ago, making…
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