There were 215 spoof news stories published in October 2019. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Funny story: Harry Maguire: Players Are Fed Up Of Ole Gunnar Solskjaer

Harry Maguire: Players Are Fed Up Of Ole Gunnar Solskjaer

Harry Maguire, the Manchester United central defender who joined the Red Devils in an £80million summer transfer from Leicester City, has said the ongoing rumours over the future of manager, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, are starting to have a negative effec...

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Funny story: Mane's VAR mistake

Mane's VAR mistake

~Anfield After a 1-1 draw with Manchester United on Sunday, Sadio Mane was outraged with Manchester United's goal, saying that it should not have stood. He criticised VAR, and said that it had been used wrongly, claiming that Liverpool should have...

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Funny story: Manchester United Dumps Ole Gunnar: “Action” Jackson To Take Reins

Manchester United Dumps Ole Gunnar: “Action” Jackson To Take Reins

BILLINGSGATE POST: Manchester United announced today that manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer has been fired, to be replaced by Jack “Action” Jackson, an American topflight manager who caught their eye last year after posting an undefeated season with the...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire To Replace Ole Gunnar Solskjaer As Manchester United Manager

Harry Maguire To Replace Ole Gunnar Solskjaer As Manchester United Manager

In an announcement from Old Trafford just minutes ago, it was revealed that Manchester United manager, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, is to be replaced with immediate effect by £80million summer signing from Leicester City, Harry Maguire. Maguire, 26, beco...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Seriously Considering His Future

Harry Maguire Seriously Considering His Future

Harry Maguire, the Manchester United and England central defender who, it could be said, had the world at his feet just three short months ago, is now seriously considering his future, and a possible move out of Old Trafford in the January transfer...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire In Changing Room 'Groping' Incident

Harry Maguire In Changing Room 'Groping' Incident

Harry Maguire, the Manchester United and England defender is tonight at the centre of not only the famous Old Traffotd club's shaky defence, but also of groping accusations, which manager Ole Hunnar Solskjaer has said he is determined to get to the b...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Should Have Been Top Of My Shopping List - Guardiola

Harry Maguire Should Have Been Top Of My Shopping List - Guardiola

Manchester City boss, Pep Guardiola, has finally 'seen the light', and has admitted that he should have signed central defender Harry Maguire in the summer. Maguire, 26, eventually signed for City's rivals, Manchester United, in an £80million deal...

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Funny story: Manchester United Boss Ole Gunnar Solskjaer Has Gone Into Hiding

Manchester United Boss Ole Gunnar Solskjaer Has Gone Into Hiding

Beleagured Manchester United manager, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, is reported to have gone into hiding after being relentlessly slammed in the press for his team's inept performances in the Premier League this season. United sit in 12th place in the lea...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Wishes He'd Stayed At Leicester

Harry Maguire Wishes He'd Stayed At Leicester

Harry Maguire, the Manchester United and England central defender who was the subject of an £80million summer transfer from Leicester City, has experienced a somewhat disappointing start to his Old Trafford career, with United currently in tenth posi...

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Funny story: Manchester United Talking To Zinedine Zidane, Steve Bruce, And Ricky Tomlinson

Manchester United Talking To Zinedine Zidane, Steve Bruce, And Ricky Tomlinson

Manchester United, the football team that employed one manager - Sir Alex Ferguson - for 27 years, is looking to part company with the fourth manager - Ole Gunnar Solskjaer - in the space of the six years since Ferguson retired, and are talking to Re...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Helps England Almost Draw

Harry Maguire Helps England Almost Draw

It turned out not to be England's night last night, after they were beaten by a late, late goal to lose 2-1 to the Czech Republic in Prague. The Three Lions took the lead through a Harry Kane penalty after 5 minutes, but one can't help thinking it...

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Funny story: Manchester United Manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer Found Hiding In Closet Under Stairs

Manchester United Manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer Found Hiding In Closet Under Stairs

A crisis at Old Trafford was averted this morning when, after an initial panic and a frantic search, Manchester United club boss, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, was discovered at his home, hiding in a cupboard under the stairs. Solskjaer, 46, has been weat...

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Funny story: Harry Kane Says Tottenham Were Unlucky In Bayern Munich Rout

Harry Kane Says Tottenham Were Unlucky In Bayern Munich Rout

Tottenham Hotspur captain, Harry Kane, claimed his side were unlucky, and did not get "the rub of the green" in their Champions League match against Bayern Munich at White Hart Lane last night. Spurs were mauled 7-2. It could have been more.

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Funny story: Harry Maguire: Man Utd Team Reading Works Of Existentialist Albert Camus

Harry Maguire: Man Utd Team Reading Works Of Existentialist Albert Camus

Harry Maguire, the Manchester United and England defender, is so absolutely hacked-off with things at Old Trafford, what with poor performances and the 'Ole Gunnar Solskjaer situation', that he is suffering from depression, and has taken to reading t...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire: Manchester United In Relegation Battle

Harry Maguire: Manchester United In Relegation Battle

It's not often you see Manchester United 'down among the dead men' and in a relegation battle, but, after Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's men were beaten yet again yesterday - this time at St. James' Park - thats precisely the position in which they find them...

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Funny story: Paul Pogba Wants More Money

Paul Pogba Wants More Money

Paul Pogba, the Manchester United football player, is annoyed, and he's annoyed because he wants more money. Pogba, who is French, doesn't know exactly how much more money he wants, but he knows, for certain, he wants more than he's getting at the...

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Funny story: Sam Allardyce Gets Manchester United Job

Sam Allardyce Gets Manchester United Job

It's taken him 28 years and a succession of posts at Preston, Blackpool, Notts County, Bolton, Newcastle, Blackburn, West Ham, Sunderland, England, Crystal Palace and Everton, but it now looks like Sam Allardyce is finally going to get his hands on '...

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Funny story: In Nod to Animal Rights, Tyson Grants Employed Birds Free Lifetime Housing and Healthcare

In Nod to Animal Rights, Tyson Grants Employed Birds Free Lifetime Housing and Healthcare

In a groundbreaking nod to animal rights, poultry producer, Tyson Foods, agreed to guarantee free lifetime room, board, and healthcare, including unlimited hormone treatment and antibiotics, for the millions of birds employed at its chicken and turke...

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Funny story: Ole Gunnar Solskjaer Makes Wild Statement After Manchester United Fail To Impress Again

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer Makes Wild Statement After Manchester United Fail To Impress Again

Manchester United boss, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, says his team were "unlucky" in Holland, as they were denied a penalty during their drab, uninspiring goalless draw with AZ Alkmaar, in last night's Europa League fixture. "It's a penalty 101 times out...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire In Halloween Trick-Or-Treat Incident

Harry Maguire In Halloween Trick-Or-Treat Incident

The Manchester United and England central defender, Harry Maguire, and his girlfriend, Fern Hawkins, have been spoken to by police after an unsavoury incident at their home last night, involving Halloween revellers. A group of young children, 200-...

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Funny story: Southampton Scoreboard Staff Consider Strike Action

Southampton Scoreboard Staff Consider Strike Action

There's a drama developing at The Dell this morning, after it was announced that the staff who operate the scoreboard for Premier League Southampton are to take industrial action over working conditions. The trouble flared up after Friday night's...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Tweet Deemed "Offensive" By Manchester United Fans, And Deleted

Harry Maguire Tweet Deemed "Offensive" By Manchester United Fans, And Deleted

Manchester United fans' love affair with £80million summer buy, Harry Maguire, may be 'on the rocks' this morning, after a Twitter tweet the star made yesterday annoyed a section of supporters with its content. This came after disgruntled United f...

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Funny story: Murder Suspect May Buy Manchester United

Murder Suspect May Buy Manchester United

The red half of Greater Manchester is buzzing with expectation tonight, after it was leaked to the media that the lead suspect in the as-yet unsolved Jamal Khashoggi murder, Saudi Arabian Prince Mohammed bin Salman, is interested in buying Manchester...

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Funny story: Sir Bobby Charlton Wades Into Solskjaer Sacking Debate

Sir Bobby Charlton Wades Into Solskjaer Sacking Debate

Manchester United legend, Sir Bobby Charlton, has weighed-in with his tuppenceworth to the debate about whether or not team manager, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer should be given more time to turn things around at Old Trafford, after the Red Devils' worst sta...

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Funny story: “View From Under The Bus” opens Thursday with sparkling cast

“View From Under The Bus” opens Thursday with sparkling cast

Star-studded and “brilliant,” according to The New York Times, the story of Joe Biden’s “noble sacrifice” is already getting rave reviews. Mr. Biden is the unfortunate tragic hero, sacrificed when Democrats surge into impeachment conflict with Mr...

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Funny story: Forever 21 Goes Out of Business--To Reopen as AARP Thrifty 63

Forever 21 Goes Out of Business--To Reopen as AARP Thrifty 63

Former fashion powerhouse retailer, Forever 21, announced it will close three Arizona stores effective December 31, and its remaining outlets in 2020. According to Forever 21 president, Jin Sook Chang, "... the retail fashion market has evolved and...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Named England Captain For Czech Game

Harry Maguire Named England Captain For Czech Game

Harry Maguire, the Manchester United central defender, is to be given the captain's armband when England travel to Prague to play the Czech Republic in their European Championship Group A qualifying match tomorrow, Friday 11 October. For Maguire,...

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Funny story: Manchester United Could Be Facing Relegation Battle By Christmas

Manchester United Could Be Facing Relegation Battle By Christmas

If Manchester United fans thought their heroes were up against it after their disappointing 1-1 draw with Arsenal at Old Trafford on Monday night, they would have been doubly so after checking the fixture list and seeing that next up is a tricky away...

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Funny story: Boris Johnson "Groped Queen"

Boris Johnson "Groped Queen"

British Prime Minister Boris Johnson is in deep trouble this morning, after the number of women alleging sexual assault against him rose to three - the latest being Her Majesty the Queen. Her Royal Highness has said that, during her meeting with t...

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Funny story: Manchester United Penalty Woes Continue

Manchester United Penalty Woes Continue

Manchester United picked up three easy points in their 3-1 victory against Norwich City yesterday, but their on-field problems continue, as they managed to miss TWO more penalties, bringing their total number of spot-kick failures this season to four...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire “Big Hat-No Cattle” Said New Manager “Action” Jackson

Harry Maguire “Big Hat-No Cattle” Said New Manager “Action” Jackson

BILLINGSGATE POST: It didn’t take long for new Manchester United Manager “Action” Jackson to ruffle some feathers, once he took over his new job from Ole Gunnar Solskjaer. Action grew up on a ranch in North Dakota, where fools and imposters were...

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Funny story: Vapers, Anti-Vapers Debate at Madison Square Garden

Vapers, Anti-Vapers Debate at Madison Square Garden

Madison Square Garden, NYC. By Woof Blister, reporting for SIN, Spoof International News. Before a capacity crowd of 20,789 agitated partisans, the long-anticipated Great Debate between those supporting the right to vape Ecigarettes and their opponen...

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Funny story: CDC issues nationwide Zombie Apocalypse Alter on spread of TDS

CDC issues nationwide Zombie Apocalypse Alter on spread of TDS

Washington, DC - On Friday, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) issued a nationwide Zombie Apocalypse Alter on the spread of Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS). Back on May 16, 2011, the CDC offered guidance to Americans by publishing...

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Funny story: Washington Post - "Remembers Softer Side of War"

Washington Post - "Remembers Softer Side of War"

WASHINGTON DC - It's often considered poor etiquette to "speak ill of the dead", and the staff of the Washington Post newspaper has gone the extra mile to show kindness when the Cold Hand of Death reached out on the field of battle. In this case, the...

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Funny story: Denver- If Colorado Were Like The Human Body and Flawlessly Designed By God Then Denver Would Be The Rectum

Denver- If Colorado Were Like The Human Body and Flawlessly Designed By God Then Denver Would Be The Rectum

Denver! Denver, Colorado! Denver- where the pus of the plains erupts to the surface and spreads like lava over a 155 square radius of otherwise pristine land. Denver- a scab that envelopes the foot of the Rockies and gives them athletes foo...

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Funny story: Trump Announces the Construction of a Luxury Prison

Trump Announces the Construction of a Luxury Prison

Washington, DC In the wake of several convicted felons, some of whom are personal friends of Donald Trump, the President has made an announcement to build several luxury prisons across the United States. "A luxury prison is something that this cou...

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Funny story: Trump: “I Don’t Know Erdogan, Giuliani or the Kurds, I Take Photos with Lots of People”

Trump: “I Don’t Know Erdogan, Giuliani or the Kurds, I Take Photos with Lots of People”

Washington - President Trump distanced himself from the Syrian Crisis and the Ukraine Scandal today by claiming not to know any of the key players involved in the two issues. “They say Rudy was my lawyer. Maybe he did do a little work for us year...

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Funny story: Nancy Pelosi to star as Blanche in Off-Broadway re-make of “A Streetcar Named Desire”

Nancy Pelosi to star as Blanche in Off-Broadway re-make of “A Streetcar Named Desire”

Ms. Pelosi is reported enthused over this role, especially due to Representative Schiff taking the part of Stanley Kowalski, formerly performed by Marlon Brando. Mr. Schiff does a variation on the muscular Brando via his eyes, which bulge and prot...

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Funny story: Racist Bulgarian Ultras So Disgusted, They Left At Halftime

Racist Bulgarian Ultras So Disgusted, They Left At Halftime

There was another easy three points for the England football team in Sofia last night, as Gareth Southgate's boys absolutely annihilated Bulgaria by a trouncingly-reassuring 6-0 scoreline, settling fans' nerves after last week's poor show in the Czec...

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Funny story: Gasoline Prices In US Tumble To 10c A Gallon As Trump Inducts Saudi Arabia As 51st State

Gasoline Prices In US Tumble To 10c A Gallon As Trump Inducts Saudi Arabia As 51st State

Following the September 14 attack on Saudi Arabia’s Aramco refineries, America promptly blamed Iran for the attack. “It’s an Act of War on US interests,” declared the world’s greatest sanction-slapper, President Donald Trump. “Oil is always a US inte...

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Funny story: General Anesthesia Recommended for Majority of American Population

General Anesthesia Recommended for Majority of American Population

With over half of Americans regularly taking at least one prescription medication for either physical or psychological ailments or both, the Food and Drug Administration has recommended that the majority of the population simply be put under general...

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Funny story: Man And His Wife Saw EastEnders Ricky Butcher In Magaluf

Man And His Wife Saw EastEnders Ricky Butcher In Magaluf

A man and his wife enjoying an evening promenade in the Majorcan tourist resort of Magaluf were shocked and surprised to see the EastEnders character Ricky Butcher sitting outside a bar with his friends, getting blathered. His ex-wife, I mean.

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Funny story: BBC One announces Autumn Programming Lineup

BBC One announces Autumn Programming Lineup

BBC One announced a full roster of new programming for the autumn, with the following new shows: "All Things Well Done under the HUN" - A historical documentary series about the torment endured by artistis who knew early, and who tried to warn the...

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Funny story: AZ Alkmaar Consider Sacking Boss After Failure To Beat Manchester United

AZ Alkmaar Consider Sacking Boss After Failure To Beat Manchester United

Club executives at AZ Alkmaar are, this morning, involved in an emergency high-level meeting over the future of the oddly-named team boss, Arne Slot, after last night's game against Manchester United, which ended 0-0. Slot, which is pronounced by...

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Funny story: Buddhist Meditation Video on Disgustingness of the Body Goes Viral

Buddhist Meditation Video on Disgustingness of the Body Goes Viral

Striking a chord with many, a Buddhist video on the practice of asabha bhavana, a meditation in which one focuses on the loathsomeness of the physical body and its dirty, disgusting nature, went viral overnight, reaching millions eager to contemplate...

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Funny story: Sudoku Puzzle Finally Completed

Sudoku Puzzle Finally Completed

Sudoku puzzles can be tricky things to complete, especially if they are in the 'hard', or even 'fiendish' categories, so imagine the relief one man felt when he eventually finished off another version of the complicated Chinese game which, instead of...

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Funny story: That "My Life" Website: It Ain't My Life

That "My Life" Website: It Ain't My Life

For many years I've tried to find Anne, who, like me, was a first-year high school teacher in Sacramento 62 years ago. Last week I found her...on My Life. Phone number, address, and enough info to convince me that I had located the right Anne. I had,...

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Funny story: Staring At The Sun Can Damage Eyesight

Staring At The Sun Can Damage Eyesight

A warning published today by the British Medical Council says that staring at the Sun for hours on end could seriously damage a person's eyesight, and could, ultimately result in blindness. The Sun is a giant orange orb in space, located around 93...

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Funny story: Hell Becoming Increasingly Uninhabitable Due to Climate Change

Hell Becoming Increasingly Uninhabitable Due to Climate Change

While never pleasant, climate experts report that hell is becoming all but uninhabitable due to global warming. "People there are having an even tougher time than usual," said underworld reporter David Cohan. "Poor souls!" Cohan stated, too, th...

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Funny story: The Donald J Trump removal program fully explained

The Donald J Trump removal program fully explained

As impeachment proceedings intensify, and a second whistleblower has come forth, we turn to Dr. Rollon Shystrovski for further details. Dr. Shystrovski is an independent analyst with anonymous origins and several degrees in State Secrets and Other...

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Funny story: The Onion Steals Johnny Shlep From The Spoof: Highway Robbery!

The Onion Steals Johnny Shlep From The Spoof: Highway Robbery!

BILLINGSGATE POST: Former TheSpoof.com writer Johnny Shlep has been proffered an offer he couldn’t refuse. The Onion, an American satirical digital media company located in Chicago, announced that Johnny Shlep, formally one of the elite writers for...

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Funny story: Greta Thunberg Is Planet Earth's Number One Enemy

Greta Thunberg Is Planet Earth's Number One Enemy

Greta Thunberg, the schoolgirl activist on climate change, is, according to a man sat thinking about it in his tea break, Planet Earth's 'Public Enemy Number One'. Moys Kenwood, 56, was reading a report about Thunberg's campaigning exploits, when...

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Funny story: "The Right to Vape" is a First Amendment Guarantee

"The Right to Vape" is a First Amendment Guarantee

Washington, D.C. Special to The Spoof. Vapor Manufacturers of America, a trade organization that brings together the major producers of E-cigarettes, today launched a public relations campaign to stop the anti-vaping movement that has led to the bann...

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Funny story: TESLA introduces new Child Safety Features

TESLA introduces new Child Safety Features

Inspired entrepreneur and caring parent Elon Musk, flanked by smiling board members, unveiled the new "Tesla Tussle Egg", designed to instantly spray out and surround children in a space-age, see-through foam which protects both car interior, and chi...

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Funny story: Did The New York Times Plagiarize Dr. Billingsgate?

Did The New York Times Plagiarize Dr. Billingsgate?

BILLINGSGATE POST: Did the New York Times pick up and run with this story, falsely attributing it to President Trump instead of Dr. Billingsgate? You decide. New York Times By Michael D. Shear and Julie Hirschfeld Davis Oct. 1, 2019 Quo...

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Funny story: Kurds Were Unable to Participate in 1944 Normandy Invasion Because of Bone Spurs, Say Historians

Kurds Were Unable to Participate in 1944 Normandy Invasion Because of Bone Spurs, Say Historians

Washington - President Donald Trump, justifying his abandonment of the Kurdish people that fought ISIS in Syria on behalf of the United States, pointed out that the Kurds were "not our allies during World War 2", and did not "participate in the Norma...

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Funny story: President Trump May Have Been Given Blow Job By Anne Sacoolas

President Trump May Have Been Given Blow Job By Anne Sacoolas

It's been rumored that, after she was summoned to the White House to meet the parents of a young motorcyclist she had killed in England in August, Anne Sacoolas, the wife of a US intelligence officer, may have given President Donald Trump a blow job.

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Funny story: Lifestyle Medicine Doctor Urges Americans to Stop Shaming Fat People

Lifestyle Medicine Doctor Urges Americans to Stop Shaming Fat People

Dr. Lyle Hackett, a lifestyle medicine physician who helps people cure chronic health problems through changes to their diet and lifestyle, made an impassioned plea for Americans to stop shaming fat people. "Just because you're grossly obese and c...

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Funny story: Sir Bobby Charlton Is 82 Today!

Sir Bobby Charlton Is 82 Today!

Sir Bobby Charlton CBE, the former Preston North End and England legend, is celebrating his birthday today - he's 82 years young. Sir Bobby - real name Sir Robert - was injured but survived the 1958 Munich Air Disaster, playing for many more year...

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Funny story: “Action” Jackson, The Original “Flyover” Dude

“Action” Jackson, The Original “Flyover” Dude

BILLINGSGATE POST: He trod the same prairies as the mastodon. A virtual combination of Captain America and caveman, Jack “Action” Jackson is what America is all about. If there is such a creature as the Flyover Dude, Action is he. Growing up in...

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Funny story: Why Liberace Was Buried Face Down

Why Liberace Was Buried Face Down

BILLINGSGATE POST: Wladziu Valentino Liberace was born to play the piano, in the year 1919 in West Allis, Wisconsin. He was buried In the year 1987 in Forest Lawn Cemetery in Los Angeles, face down. He went by other names during his career; Walte...

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Funny story: Philosopher Brings Debate to Halt by Asking whether Scientology Opponent Is High

Philosopher Brings Debate to Halt by Asking whether Scientology Opponent Is High

In a heated debate over the existence of God, free will, and fundamental life spirit, philosophy professor and outspoken atheist, Dr. Donald Cartwright, brought the discussion to a screeching halt by asking whether his debate opponent, Church of Scie...

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Funny story: New App Helps You Learn A New Language In As Little As Two Years

New App Helps You Learn A New Language In As Little As Two Years

A new phone app on the market next month enables you to learn and speak a new language fluently - to native speaker standard - in as little as two years, it has been claimed. The app - DIY - explores a revolutionary new method of learning, which,...

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Funny story: The Ralph Lauren Express

The Ralph Lauren Express

Land in London, taxi to Woodstock for the Blenheim Horse Trials, then train to Scotland for falconry, at the British School of Falconry, train back down to London. Three in the morning, “ouch.” Serious big, “ouch”. Call the paramedics! No, not th...

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Funny story: Berkeley Profs Sell Endorsements, Images and Classroom Naming Rights

Berkeley Profs Sell Endorsements, Images and Classroom Naming Rights

Berkeley, CA. Exclusive to The Spoof. After Gov. Gavin Newsom signed a bill allowing California university athletes to take pay for endorsements and images, the faculty senate here at Berkeley decided that the university's professors could supplement...

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Funny story: Lewis Hamilton Wins Mexico Grand Prix Wearing A Sombrero

Lewis Hamilton Wins Mexico Grand Prix Wearing A Sombrero

Formula One motor racing fans probably thought they had seen everything the sport had to throw at them over the years, but British driver, Lewis Hamilton, had a surprise for fans at the Mexican Grand Prix yesterday, as he rode - and won - the race we...

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Funny story: Man Annoyed That He Probably Won't Get To See Halley's Comet Again

Man Annoyed That He Probably Won't Get To See Halley's Comet Again

A man that is interested in seeing things has said that he is upset and annoyed that, in all likelihood, he won't get to see Halley's Comet again. Moys Kenwood, 56, was born in 1963, and, as the comet is not expected again until 28 July 2061 when...

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Funny story: English Subtitles Spoilt Man's Enjoyment Of Chinese Film

English Subtitles Spoilt Man's Enjoyment Of Chinese Film

A man watching a Chinese-language movie with English subtitles has revealed how his enjoyment of the production was spoilt because of the sub-standard skills of those responsible for the translations. The movie was on the TV on Saturday morning, a...

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Funny story: Donald Jr. and Ivanka Trump Land Jobs at Breitbart After Exposing Hunter Biden Nepotism Scandal

Donald Jr. and Ivanka Trump Land Jobs at Breitbart After Exposing Hunter Biden Nepotism Scandal

Washington - As proud father Donald Sr. stood by, Donald Trump Jr. and sister Ivanka Trump accepted positions with the Breitbart News Organization as Investigative News Editors in a public ceremony in Washington yesterday. The appointments were ba...

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Funny story: Man Describes Himself As An Organ Grinder

Man Describes Himself As An Organ Grinder

A medical man has raised eyebrows in literary circles this morning, and done himself no favors whatsoever, by casually and misguidedly referring to his good self as an 'organ grinder'. The literary doctor, who must remain nameless, labelled himsel...

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Funny story: Toilet Plunger Was 'Sent From God'

Toilet Plunger Was 'Sent From God'

A man who bought a toilet plunger to be able to deal with his family's constantly-blocked toilet, has described the item as "an invaluable purchase", and "an absolute Godsend". The problem with the toilet at the home of Moys Kenwood, 56, may not h...

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Funny story: Hillary Clinton falls off subway platform; saved by psychic Russian immigrant

Hillary Clinton falls off subway platform; saved by psychic Russian immigrant

Despite the dramatic rescue of Hillary Clinton in front of a subway train, her rescuer may not be rewarded. Yesterday, Ms. Clinton was addressing a subway platform crowd on “the Russian menace” when she accidentally fell (or was shoved) off a subw...

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Funny story: Animal Control Tasked With Arresting Rudy Giuliani

Animal Control Tasked With Arresting Rudy Giuliani

Washington, D.C. - When Trump's personal attack dog, Rudy Giuliani, inevitably gets arrested soon, the job will not be dealt with by the police, or even the FBI, says a Justice Department spokesperson. No, the job of arresting Trump's lawyer will fal...

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Funny story: Jimmy Sham Attacked By Hong Kong Phooey

Jimmy Sham Attacked By Hong Kong Phooey

One of the leaders of the Hong Kong protests, Jimmy Sham, has been taken to hospital after suffering a hammer attack, and being left in the street, covered in blood. Several witnesses said the attacker looked "a bit like a canine Kung Fu exponenet...

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Funny story: Gabbard’s Strong Coalition Includes Anti-Clinton, Pro-Assad and “Guys Who Just Want a Hot President” Groups

Gabbard’s Strong Coalition Includes Anti-Clinton, Pro-Assad and “Guys Who Just Want a Hot President” Groups

Washington - An emerging coalition of groups supporting Democratic Presidential candidate Tulsi Gabbard includes voters who side with her versus Hillary Clinton in their developing dispute. Adding these backers to assorted Russian bots, pro-Assad Sy...

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Funny story: Robot Galley Slaves And Silicon Sex Chicks Found In Wreckage Off Carthage Coast

Robot Galley Slaves And Silicon Sex Chicks Found In Wreckage Off Carthage Coast

BILLINGSGATE POST: In a diving expedition off the coast of Carthage, a sunken Roman Galley, dating back to the Punic Wars, was found submerged in 60 feet of water. Until now, it was thought that these warships were rowed by galley slaves, either...

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Funny story: NASA Mistakes Kim Kardashian's Rear as Earth's Long Theorized Second Moon

NASA Mistakes Kim Kardashian's Rear as Earth's Long Theorized Second Moon

In an embarrassing mistake sure make some heads roll, as well as eyes, NASA issued a retraction to a recent story that the long-theorized, but never confirmed, "Earth's Second Moon" had been found, once it was confirmed it was actually a picture of...

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Funny story: Manchester United And Liverpool Will Walk Off If Anyone So Much As THINKS Anything Racist

Manchester United And Liverpool Will Walk Off If Anyone So Much As THINKS Anything Racist

The game between Manchester United and Premier League leaders Liverpool is just about to kick off at Old Trafford, and the big news is that both teams have agreed they will walk off the pitch if any of the supporters so much as thinks anything of a r...

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Funny story: GOP Will "Shut Down Impeachment Hearing in House With More Really Cool Signs" Says Jim Jordan

GOP Will "Shut Down Impeachment Hearing in House With More Really Cool Signs" Says Jim Jordan

Washington - House Republicans including Jim Jordan and Matt Gaetz vowed to "completely destroy Nancy Pelosi, Adam Schiff and the Socialist Radicals in the House," during the upcoming impeachment debates, by utilizing "really cool signs" that are "ev...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Stuns Soccer World by Announcing Early Retirement

Harry Maguire Stuns Soccer World by Announcing Early Retirement

Manchester, UK. Woof Blister reporting for SIN - Spoof International News. In a shocking tweet posted in late afternoon today, the most beloved [and parodied] player in European and UK soccer history revealed that he will retire early - in fact, this...

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Funny story: Treatment to eliminate pedophilia has been discovered

Treatment to eliminate pedophilia has been discovered

A recent ground-breaking discovery has discovered that pedophilia is linked to a mineral deficiency in the brain. According to Dr. James Harpington of Area Research Center in Reasonville, "We have determined that sex offenders tend to lack suffic...

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Funny story: Maker of Manafort's Ostrich Jacket to Donate $100 for Each Sold to Help Trump Fight Corruption in Ukraine

Maker of Manafort's Ostrich Jacket to Donate $100 for Each Sold to Help Trump Fight Corruption in Ukraine

Washington - The Alain Charcuterie Boutique Men's Store in New York City has said it will help President Trump's crusade to end corruption in the Ukraine by donating $100 for each $15,000 ostrich leather jacket it sells before Christmas. The jacke...

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Funny story: Pocahontas: “Mexico Will Pay For Our Health Care.”

Pocahontas: “Mexico Will Pay For Our Health Care.”

BILLINGSGATE POST: Pocahontas has finally been pinned down. For months, she has dodged the question regarding who would come up with the 30 trillion dollars to pay for our health care. Taking a page from President Trump’s successful campaign mant...

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Funny story: MPs Seek Brexit Extension "Until The End Of Time"

MPs Seek Brexit Extension "Until The End Of Time"

It's been more than three years now since the UK referendum on whether or not to leave the EU, and still the government can't quite get the country 'over the line'. Prime Minister Boris Johnson has repeatedly asserted that, deal or no deal, Octobe...

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Funny story: President Trump Reveals He Has Been Joking About Everything

President Trump Reveals He Has Been Joking About Everything

In a speech that will have sent shockwaves all around the world, President Donald Trump last night revealed that, despite all the evidence to the contrary, his antics over the past four years have been mere jest, he was "just joking", and he is surpr...

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Funny story: Yin and Yang Seek Divorce, Citing Irreconcilable Differences

Yin and Yang Seek Divorce, Citing Irreconcilable Differences

Yin and Yang, one of the world's most beloved and recognizable couples, have filed for divorce, citing irreconcilable differences as the reason for their split. "It happens," said the dark-haired Ms. Yin. "After thousands of years, couples just gr...

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Funny story: New Fad Of Carrying An Intravenous Drip Whilst Riding A Motorcycle, Sweeping Through City

New Fad Of Carrying An Intravenous Drip Whilst Riding A Motorcycle, Sweeping Through City

A new 'fad' of riding a motorcycle after having visited a doctor to have an intravenous saline solution drip fitted, has swept through one southeast Asian country almost as fast as the Dengue Fever it's hoped the drip will help clear up. The quirk...

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Funny story: Encylopedia of Pretexts for Politics and Business due out by Christmas on Amazon dot com

Encylopedia of Pretexts for Politics and Business due out by Christmas on Amazon dot com

This newly-established encyclopedia already shows massive pre-sales, with release date December 24. It bears an array of acknowledgements on its title page: “Fascism is the cockroach of contemporary politics—even a nuclear war will not kill it!...

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Funny story: Fortnite powers down. Millions of boys reunited with loved ones

Fortnite powers down. Millions of boys reunited with loved ones

Parents and siblings are rejoicing today after reuniting with missing family members thought lost forever. The popular video game Fortnite powered down Sunday, leaving only a black hole visible on the screen and millions of players confused and unab...

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Funny story: Man's 'Lost' Glasses Turn Up Safe And Sound

Man's 'Lost' Glasses Turn Up Safe And Sound

A man who thought he had misplaced his reading spectacles and looked all over his house for them, is celebrating this evening after they subsequently turned up safe and sound - on his head! Moys Kenwood, 56, spent his evening between playing with...

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Funny story: Trump Requires All Countries in World to Attend Anti-Corruption Summit at Mar-A-Lago or Risk Sanctions

Trump Requires All Countries in World to Attend Anti-Corruption Summit at Mar-A-Lago or Risk Sanctions

Washington - President Donald Trump will require every country in the world wanting to have diplomatic relations, trade with, or receive aid from, the United States to attend a week-long anti-corruption seminar at his Mar-A-Lago luxury resort in Palm...

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Funny story: Man's Family Acquires Rabbit

Man's Family Acquires Rabbit

Rabbits are lovely, although a bit dimwitted, creatures, and don't always make the best pets due to their lack of interaction with their owners, but one family is celebrating their good fortune this evening after being presented with one of the lovab...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Successfully Forces Things

Nashville Man Successfully Forces Things

Though frequently commended for his laid-back, easygoing manner, 46-year-old Jake Hamilton of Nashville. Tennessee, grew tired of waiting for life to start working for him, and made up his mind to start forcing things - which he did, with enormous su...

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Funny story: Racist Bulgarian Ultras Strike Again In England's Heartland

Racist Bulgarian Ultras Strike Again In England's Heartland

The racism that England players so bravely put up with, turned the other cheek to, and ultimately vanquished, reared its ugly head once more yesterday, this time on home turf, as an exciting FA Cup fourth qualifying round game was ruined by hordes of...

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Funny story: Trump says He will accept Impeachment if a Majority of Representatives Can Spell It

Trump says He will accept Impeachment if a Majority of Representatives Can Spell It

In an effort today to prove that he is smarter than his Democratic counterparts, President Trump said he would accept his impeachment by the House of Representatives if those who want to impeach him can spell it. In a statement released by the...

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Funny story: Hong Kong: Carrie Lam Calls In Hong Kong Phooey

Hong Kong: Carrie Lam Calls In Hong Kong Phooey

The crisis in Hong Kong deepened still further today as the island's leader, Carrie Lam, having been forced to abandon her policy address when members of parliament disrupted her speech and drowned out her voice with heckling, took the most drastic a...

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Funny story: Rural "wild dog" school provides an alternative to state-funded education

Rural "wild dog" school provides an alternative to state-funded education

An unusual school in Mississippi is proving surprisingly popular with local families. There are no teachers, no classrooms and no curriculum. The pupils are cared for by wild dogs in a pit in the woods. School governor Jeff Hound explained the ide...

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Funny story: Six Ways to Get an Atheist's Goat

Six Ways to Get an Atheist's Goat

Tired of hearing your heathen friends whine about science and organized religion while completely ignoring your warnings about hell? Well, here are six  ways guaranteed to get those smooth-talking tricksters off their game. Why six? Because if yo...

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Funny story: Anne Sacoolas Denies Driving On Wrong Side Of The Road

Anne Sacoolas Denies Driving On Wrong Side Of The Road

Anne Sacoolas, the American woman who was the driver involved in a road accident in England, which killed a 19-year-old motorcyclist, has denied that she was driving on the wrong side of the road when the accident happened. Harry Dunn was killed o...

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Funny story: Trump PS to Erdogan letter used as rolling paper denied

Trump PS to Erdogan letter used as rolling paper denied

Breaking: Mr. Trump not only sent a letter to Turkey’s President Erdogan on October 9, he also sent a PS--not disclosed by mainstream press so far. Mr. Trump’s first message is famous as deposited “in the bin” by Mr. Erdogan, according to insider...

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Funny story: VAR To Sort Out If England 1966 World Cup Goal Was In Or Not

VAR To Sort Out If England 1966 World Cup Goal Was In Or Not

VAR, the Video Assistant Referee, which has proved so successful in helping on-field officials reach correct decisions in football matches all over the world, is to be used to determine whether or not the ball had crossed the line in England's 1966 W...

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