There have been 165 spoof news stories published in 2019. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to browse the spoof news archives.

Arabic Porno Magazine Goes On Sale From Today

Funny story: Arabic Porno Magazine Goes On Sale From Today

A 'Men's Magazine', so indecent, that we are unable to print a picture from it, goes on sale in the Persian Gulf from today. Instead, we have provided a picture of another magazine of a similar ilk, which is also geared towards Arabic men. The...

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Trump To Pull All US Troops Out Of Russia

Funny story: Trump To Pull All US Troops Out Of Russia

The always amiable and jovial President Donald Trump has announced the US will be pulling all US troops out of Russia starting at the end of February. At a press conference on Wednesday afternoon the President said the following: “It is time to ge...

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Heathrow Drone Was A UFO

Funny story: Heathrow Drone Was A UFO

A drone that was sighted flying near Heathrow Airport yesterday was not being operated by an irresponsible moron from the droning community, and was a UFO, says a man who knows what he is talking about. The UFO was seen by several members of the p...

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Man Starts Off New Year As He Means To Go On - By Cleaning His Earholes Out

Funny story: Man Starts Off New Year As He Means To Go On - By Cleaning His Earholes Out

A new year, and a new beginning were the sentiments expressed by one man this morning, as Tony Chudworth made it his New Year's resolution to clean out his earholes 'more often than in the past'. On paper, this doesn't mean very much. Chudworth ha...

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Overseas English Teacher Finds A New Way To Be More Expressive and Dynamic

Funny story: Overseas English Teacher Finds A New Way To Be More Expressive and Dynamic

Bradley Johnston, 27, moved to Changwon City, South Korea, after earning his degree in Education. When he started teaching English, however, he began struggling to find ways to get his students more excited about the English language. All too o...

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Jamal Khashoggi Murder Trial: What We Know So Far

Funny story: Jamal Khashoggi Murder Trial: What We Know So Far

The trial has opened in Riyadh, of eleven defendants accused of killing the US-based critic of Saudi Arabia, Jamal Khashoggi in the Saudi consulate in Istanbul on 2 October. The truth is that Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman ordered the kill...

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Man Suffers Narcolepsy Every Time He Thinks Of Work

Funny story: Man Suffers Narcolepsy Every Time He Thinks Of Work

A man has reacted angrily to being labelled 'workshy' by colleagues, after he telephoned his employer to tell them that he would not be able to attend work on Monday, because he was suffering from Narcolepsy. Moys Kenwood, 55, has, for a long tim...

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Trump Confesses: "I Took Orders from Moscow"

The White House. Exclusive to The Spoof. After vigorously denying, in numerous tweets, the New York Times claim that the FBI investigated President Donald Trump as a possible Russian agent who acted on behalf of Russian oligarchs, the president today...

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Man Wakes Up To Find He Can See Through Women's Clothing

Funny story: Man Wakes Up To Find He Can See Through Women's Clothing

There was a pleasant surprise in store for one man on Monday morning, when he woke from his slumbers to find that he could see through women's clothing. The x-rated X-ray treat presented itself to Malcolm Thompson when he first opened his eyes at...

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Monsanto’s First-Ever Genetically Modified Man Proves a Hit with Ladies

Funny story: Monsanto’s First-Ever Genetically Modified Man Proves a Hit with Ladies

The jury is in: Monsanto’s first-ever genetically modified human, who/which was first launched in 2016, and is the only living adult male officially certified to be Roundup-ready, has proven to be a solid hit with the ladies! Monsanto first concei...

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Second anniversary of “The Russians did it” leads to brawl in the newsroom

Funny story: Second anniversary of “The Russians did it” leads to brawl in the newsroom

Two years ago, on January 6, 2017, major intelligence agencies in the US announced “assessments” that the Russians had "interfered with" the 2016 election. These assessments bore the caveat they were only estimates, meaning they were guessing, but...

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Trump abandons plan for border wall, opts instead for 'invisible fence'

In a major concession, President Donald Trump has dropped his request for six billion dollars to build a border wall, opting instead to pursue an invisible fence along the country’s southern border with Mexico. He outlined his proposal in an address...

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Man Saw 'Riverdance' YouTube Clip, And Couldn't Keep His Feet Still

Funny story: Man Saw 'Riverdance' YouTube Clip, And Couldn't Keep His Feet Still

A man who saw a YouTube clip of the Irish dance extravaganza, 'Riverdance' was so impressed by the performances of the dancers, that he could not keep his feet still afterwards. Moys Kenwood, 55, watched the spectacle 'mesmerised', unable to look...

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Saudi Arabian Woman Due To Disappear Sometime This Week

Funny story: Saudi Arabian Woman Due To Disappear Sometime This Week

Miss Rahaf Mohammd al-Qunun, the 18-year-old Saudi Arabian woman who renounced Islam, and became involved in an uneasy stand-off at Bangkok airport on her way to Australia to seek asylum, is due to disappear sometime later this week. The Thai auth...

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Canadian Troops At US Border

Funny story: Canadian Troops At US Border

US military chiefs are in a mild panic tonight, as Canadian troops continue to pour into Manitoba, with the intention of repatriating an area of the US totally detached from it, known as the Northwest Angle. The Northwest Angle is an area - essent...

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President Trump Wants Wall On Canada Border

Funny story: President Trump Wants Wall On Canada Border

President Donald Trump has expanded his plans for territorial protection, and, as well the southern border wall to restrict the movement of Mexicans, he has now proposed a wall on the Canadian border to do the same with Canucks. The border, known...

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Steve Alford fired; "Shaq" Named UCLA Head Coach

Westwood Village, CA. Exclusive to The Spoof. As predicted by The Spoof last spring, three days after the firing of UCLA basketball coach Steve Alford, the Bruins have announced that former NBA superstar Shaquille "Shaq" O'Neal has accepted a positio...

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President Trump In Attempt To Shutdown UK Government

Funny story: President Trump In Attempt To Shutdown UK Government

US President Donald Trump has rebounded from the Democrats refusal to provide funding for the building of his Mexican border fence, by insisting that the UK government help to pay for it, hinting that, failure to do so might result in a shutdown at W...

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Polyana Viana Teaches Man A Painful Lesson

Funny story: Polyana Viana Teaches Man A Painful Lesson

A man who tried to rob the MMA fighter, Polyana Viana, outside her apartment in Brazil, received his comeuppance in no uncertain terms, when the UFC competitor kicked the living shit out of him. Viana was outside her Rio de Janeiro home when the m...

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President Trump Winning People Over

Funny story: President Trump Winning People Over

After almost three years in the job, US President Donald Trump has been the subject of a public evaluation exercise, and has fared much better than many people expected he might have done. A questionaire was completed by 14,500 members of the Amer...

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Chinese Takeaway Has Opened On The Moon

Funny story: Chinese Takeaway Has Opened On The Moon

It's been revealed that the very first Chinese takeaway has been opened on the Moon. The news was announced as part of Chinese state media's press conference on the Chang'e-4 space probe, which is exploring the dark side of the Moon, and hopes to...

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New Study Successfully Compares Apples and Oranges (Spoiler Alert: Apples Win!)

Funny story: New Study Successfully Compares Apples and Oranges (Spoiler Alert: Apples Win!)

Contravening the age-old adage that apples and oranges are inherently too different to compare, a groundbreaking new study published by the Johnny Appleseed Association reported that when considered side by side, based on a number of relevant factor...

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Snow Forecast For Switzerland Again

Funny story: Snow Forecast For Switzerland Again

Weather forecasters in the wonderful Alpine winter wonderland of Switzerland are in an excitable mood this morning, after it was looking like snow would once again fall in the country, just as it always does. Heavy snowfalls are expected in Anderm...

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New Study Casts Doubt on Science of the Stars

Funny story: New Study Casts Doubt on Science of the Stars

A new study just released by the Institute of Actual Science casts doubt on the validity of the age-old practice of astrology, which seeks to divine information about human character and affairs from the movements and relative positions of celestial...

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Trump Administration Plagued by Technical Difficulties; Prayerful Vice President Remains Cool Under Pressure

Funny story: Trump Administration Plagued by Technical Difficulties; Prayerful Vice President Remains Cool Under Pressure

Rumors are flying that, due to a number of mysterious technical difficulties, the Trump administration has lost the computer file containing the engineering design plans for President Trump’s proposed border wall. Many predict that if the missing fil...

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Nashville Man's New Year Off to Mixed Start

Funny story: Nashville Man's New Year Off to Mixed Start

After making a number of regrettable decisions and unfortunate choices in 2018, Bart Biggs of Nashville, Tennessee, resolved to do better in 2019 – specifically, he vowed to quit partying like a sociopathic rockstar, make the most of his professional...

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Trains To Get Flushable Toilets

Funny story: Trains To Get Flushable Toilets

There was good news for train commuters earlier today, when it was announced that, later this year, several of the major rail operators would be introducing toilets that flush. Train companies are reacting to criticism from passengers, who say tha...

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New York Writer Confident that 2019 Will Bring Life Muse and/or Divine Inspiration

Funny story: New York Writer Confident that 2019 Will Bring Life Muse and/or Divine Inspiration

Aspiring writer Noel Underwood of New York City, who waited in vain all of 2018 for literary success to be thrust upon him, is confident that 2019 will be the year that he happens upon his life muse and/or is struck by divine inspiration, finally cau...

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College Student Throws Calculus Textbook At Doppelganger In Sad Attempt To Make It Go Away

Funny story: College Student Throws Calculus Textbook At Doppelganger In Sad Attempt To Make It Go Away

Iowa. Nathan Lansky, a 19-year-old undergraduate student at St. Matthew's College, threw his calculus textbook at a doppelganger on Monday, January 7th at 10:30 pm, sincerely hoping that his act of frustration and rage would make the creepy appariti...

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Mueller To Trump: “Dont Call Me Flyface.”

Funny story: Mueller To Trump: “Dont Call Me Flyface.”

BILLINGSGATE POST:. Newsworthy or not, has a sitting president ever called the man charged with investigating him such a despicable name? I think not. “Flyface” connotes an image of incredible filth and ugliness. Notwithstanding the fact that Robe...

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"Grain Brain" Doctor Advocates for Lyric Change to Classic Patriotic Hymn

Funny story: "Grain Brain" Doctor Advocates for Lyric Change to Classic Patriotic Hymn

"Oh beautiful for spacious skies, for amber waves of grain," is a line that has made the hearts of countless Americans swell with patriotic pride, but David Perlmutter, M.D., whose book Grain Brain instructs people to eliminate all grains from their...

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Man Has Learnt His Lesson

Funny story: Man Has Learnt His Lesson

A man guilty of a catastrophic miscalculation has vowed never to make the same mistake again. The man, who spoke to us only on condition of anonymity, says that, although he acted with the best of intentions, he did so on impulse, and only realise...

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New Study Reports that Grass Really IS Greener on Other Side

Funny story: New Study Reports that Grass Really IS Greener on Other Side

While the adage that the grass is always greener on the other side is commonly taken as a psychological misperception that we all most want that which we do not have, a groundbreaking new study from the Niels Bohr Institute of Quantum Physics recentl...

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Local Resident Weeps and Considers Changing His Life After Reading Warning Label On Light Cigarettes

Funny story: Local Resident Weeps and Considers Changing His Life After Reading Warning Label On Light Cigarettes

Portage County, Wisconsin. Timothy Jacoby, 39, looked at his pack of Marlboro Lights last weekend and became incredibly alarmed when he saw a warning packet attached to it. Because a Federal Court has ordered the tobacco companies to make a sta...

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Spurs Boss Pochettino To Take Up Barcelona Job

Funny story: Spurs Boss Pochettino To Take Up Barcelona Job

Mauricio Pochettino, the Tottenham Hotspur coach, who has guided his team to their highest position on football's ladder for 140 years, has announced that he is to leave the club, and is Barcelona-bound. He will become a waiter in a top hotel.

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Pocahontas Visits Pocahontas

Funny story: Pocahontas Visits Pocahontas

BILLINGSGATE POST: if you ever visit Princess Park in Pocahontas, Iowa, you must check out the 25' tall Pocahontas statue, her custom-built teepee and a historic log cabin. While there, check out the historic Pocahontas Court House. Be sure to stop...

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OK Not OK With LGBT, Single Parents; Makes Entire Nation Look Bad

Funny story: OK Not OK With LGBT, Single Parents; Makes Entire Nation Look Bad

In a 60-26 vote, the state of Oklahoma's legislative body passed the Adoption Protection Act, an act that makes it legal for adoption agencies to refuse to work with LGBT, single people, and those whose lives contradict an agency's strictly-held reli...

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President Trump Meeting With Nancy Pelosi Ends Amicably Enough

Funny story: President Trump Meeting With Nancy Pelosi Ends Amicably Enough

President Donald Trump stormed out of a meeting with senior Democrats yesterday, after disagreements arose on a variety of topics. The meeting, in the Situation Room, a conference centre in the West Wing basement, was, primarily, to talk about fun...

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Bookshop Has Closed, Leaving Man Flabbergasted And Morose

Funny story: Bookshop Has Closed, Leaving Man Flabbergasted And Morose

A secondhand bookshop that was the only one in the area, has closed down for good, making a man sad in the process. The somewhat oddly-named 'Smiling Sky Bookshop', in Battambang, was a first-rate outlet for readers of fusty old books whose pages...

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Stabbing Now More Popular Than Slapping People In The Chops

Funny story: Stabbing Now More Popular Than Slapping People In The Chops

A study on knife crime based in London, has concluded that stabbing is now more popular than harmlessly slapping someone in the chops. Stabbing, which used to be seen as a 'last resort', has made giant leaps and bounds in the recent past, and is n...

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Man farts in elevator; elevator breaks down

Funny story: Man farts in elevator; elevator breaks down

Already heralded as an omen for the new year, today’s incident in a major American city (anonymous in this report) has brought significant developments. That the elevator was also crowded has added to how to respond to the problem. Numerous que...

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Bird Box Challenge Starts To Get Out Of Hand

Funny story: Bird Box Challenge Starts To Get Out Of Hand

After the story of the Utah teenager who drove a car 'birdbox' on the freeway yesterday, dozens more similar-yet-unsimilar incidents have come to light, all using the same premise of completing activities whilst 'birdbox' - blindfolded. The 'bir...

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Bill Cosby Stool Sample Frowned Upon By Prison Doctor

Funny story: Bill Cosby Stool Sample Frowned Upon By Prison Doctor

Bill Cosby, the former comedian who is currently serving a prison sentence for sex offences, is in trouble with the authorities again, after providing a stool sample that was 'less than clean'. Cosby, 81, was required to give the sample in accorda...

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Man Decides To Get Everything Off His Chest

Funny story: Man Decides To Get Everything Off His Chest

A man who has been keeping his cards close to his chest with regard to several areas of his life that are giving him concern, has decided to come clean, and share his problems with others he knows he can trust. M*** K****** (name changed to protec...

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Jeff Bezos Divorce Proves Money Can't Buy Happiness

Funny story: Jeff Bezos Divorce Proves Money Can't Buy Happiness

The world's richest man, Amazon boss, Jeff Bezos and his wife, MacKenzie, are to divorce after 25 years of marriage, proving, without a shred of a doubt, the old maxim that money can't buy you happiness. Bezos created the multinational technology...

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Part-time Male Library Assistant Kidnapped By Wealthy Voluptuous Woman

Funny story: Part-time Male Library Assistant Kidnapped By Wealthy Voluptuous Woman

Platteville, Wisconsin. Todd Wilkinson, 27, was kidnapped by a wealthy-looking, voluptuous female last Tuesday around 3:20 pm. Todd, a part-time assistant at Karmen Library, had been sitting at the front desk helping community members check out...

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Trumplovian Dog Slobber Caused By Marmaduke Acid Reflux Syndrome (MARS)

Funny story: Trumplovian Dog Slobber Caused By Marmaduke Acid Reflux Syndrome (MARS)

BILLINGSGATE POST: Newsworthy only because it appears to be, this subject might seem to be relevant, even though it’s not. If it were, no one capable of understanding it would read it, especially in this forum. In a much discussed experiment invo...

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Brother And Sister Who Married Each Other Having Second Thoughts

Funny story: Brother And Sister Who Married Each Other Having Second Thoughts

A brother and sister who did what many other people would consider to be 'the unthinkable', and married each other, are having second thoughts, and may get a divorce. Trevor Hucker, 18 and Trina Hucker, 17, tied the knot in November, creating a se...

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Town appalled flume ride uses dirty water

Funny story: Town appalled flume ride uses dirty water

It was recently discovered by residents of Goodstun, Arizona that the local log ride, built in 1957, has, in fact, been using dirty water for years. The discovery was made when local scientists from the Goodstun YMCA tested the ph balance only fo...

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Kevin McCarthy Rolls Eyes Behind Trump

Funny story: Kevin McCarthy Rolls Eyes Behind Trump

Fox news isn’t talking about it, but the free press has been directing the viewers’ eye toward people standing behind Trump while Trump is giving one of his rambling, incoherent, pointless, monologues, with freebies thrown in, like: "lots of people a...

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Chinese Lunar Rover and Lander Obsessed with Selfies

Funny story: Chinese Lunar Rover and Lander Obsessed with Selfies

A Chinese rover and lander have taken multiple images of each other and themselves on the Moon's surface, and despite Chinese mission control scientists' best efforts, they refuse to stop doing so. The Chinese space agency says the spacecraft ar...

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Apocalypse 2019 - "Everyone to Kill Everybody Else"

Funny story: Apocalypse 2019 - "Everyone to Kill Everybody Else"

New Orleans, LA - Throughout the ages, there have been many predictions about the "End Times" or the Apocalypse. The "Doomsday Clock" has been at "three minutes to midnight" almost a dozen times in less than 20 years. The simple conclusion that an or...

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Brave South Carolina Youth Prevails Over Arrogant Young Buck

Funny story: Brave South Carolina Youth Prevails Over Arrogant Young Buck

In a dramatic contest of wit, might, and tactical maneuvering, seventeen-year-old Kurt Johansen of Charleston, South Carolina, persisted and ultimately prevailed against a three-year-old buck who’d been arrogantly roaming the forest, considering the...

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Hannity: Newly Elected House Democrats to Propose that Children of Wealthy be Eaten

Funny story: Hannity: Newly Elected House Democrats to Propose that Children of Wealthy be Eaten

Washington - According to sources quoted by Fox News commentator Sean Hannity, freshmen Democratic Congresswomen and “leftist baddies” Alexandria Ocasio-Cortes and Rashida Tlaib will, among other radical laws under consideration, soon suggest that al...

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Suggestions Pour In For the Wall

Funny story: Suggestions Pour In For the Wall

Many Americans have helpfully provided hints and suggestions on building President Trump's wall. The Meldrum Brothers Nursery and Landscaping Co. feel that a wall of shrubbery would be very effective in deterring illegal immigrants. Banksy and...

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Hillary Clinton sidles up to Joe Biden in split dress to urge herself into VEEP position

Funny story: Hillary Clinton sidles up to Joe Biden in split dress to urge herself into VEEP position

Yesterday, flashing his big smile, Mr. Biden announced he is the only one who can defeat Mr. Trump in 2020. Given how his family needs him these days, he is reluctant, but he might just have to run to save The Nation. He would be happy not to,...

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Nashville Man Realizes His Life Has No Style

Funny story: Nashville Man Realizes His Life Has No Style

After struggling to complete a human resources questionnaire on diversity and lifestyle for his employer, Henry Mills of Nashville, Tennessee, came to the unfortunate conclusion that his own life has no style. “Embarrassing,” he said. “But I didn’...

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Aliens Deny 'Heathrow Drone' Accusation

Funny story: Aliens Deny 'Heathrow Drone' Accusation

There was further controversy in the Heathrow drone incident this morning, when aliens from distant galaxies contacted the airport to deny all knowledge of who was responsible. The drone was seen by several members of the public who were driving a...

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A Bag Of Chips Could Be £3 After Brexit

Funny story: A Bag Of Chips Could Be £3 After Brexit

The price of a bag of chips from a local fish and chip shop is likely to rise to £3 after Britain leaves the EU, voters have been warned, a revelation that struck fear into the hearts of the underclasses. The Prime Minister, Theresa May, told repo...

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Man With Beard Admits He Hasn’t Seen New “Gillette” Ad

Funny story: Man With Beard Admits He Hasn’t Seen New “Gillette” Ad

A local man was blushing with embarrassment as he admitted he still hasn’t seen the controversial new “Gillette” advertisement. The man claims that the reason for this lack of interest is his long beard and that he doesn’t care about watching or list...

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Employee Login System Became More Frustrating For Local Workers

Funny story: Employee Login System Became More Frustrating For Local Workers

Crawford County, Wisconsin. Employees at Bob's Quality Lumber Products were incredibly frustrated last Thursday when they found out that the website allowing them to easily access their payroll documents and W2 forms had changed dramatically over th...

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Anarchist group disbanded upon realization its an organization

A local anarchist group, known for protests and causing general unrest, disbanded this week, when members realized that they were, in fact, an organization “I didn’t sign up to this group for us to become organized,” said long time member, Barlow...

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Pompeo starts up new line of clothing for diplomats and world leaders

Funny story: Pompeo starts up new line of clothing for diplomats and world leaders

Following a recent speech in Egypt claiming the US as “a force for good,” US Secretary of State, Mr. Mike Pompeo, has said he is proud to support a new line of clothing. This new line has already been recognized all over the globe for its glisteni...

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Melania Antoinette, on Plight of Government Workers during Shutdown

The Versailles Tower, Paris, France. 2019. Special to The Spoof. With the national government ordered by King Donald XVI into a shutdown mode that now stretches into its fourth week, nearly a million workers and their families are without pay, and u...

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No Parking: A Story of Revenge

Funny story: No Parking: A Story of Revenge

They say New Year’s Eve in New York is special. Well, this one was, that’s for sure. At least for me. I stare down at the stained blue rug. The corpse has been wheeled out to the mortuary van, but the chalk outline of the literary critic’s tortured body remains as a creepy reminder for me and the other ten members of my writing club. The clock is striking twelve; the New Year has begun. But s...

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Man Wearing Lederhosen Discovered On Beach

Funny story: Man Wearing Lederhosen Discovered On Beach

Police and immigration officials were called to a beach in Norfolk this morning, when a man was discovered only half-conscious, and wearing only a pair of lederhosen. He was soaking wet. The location for this momentous event was the seaside villag...

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Sears to Merge with Upscale 99 Cent Store

Sears Tower, Chicago. Edward Lampert, hedge fund manager and the largest stockholder in Sears, Roebuck and Co., today announced that his company's 400-plus stores would remain open under a deal he just negotiated with the nation's largest cut-rate do...

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Lady Gaga Has Second Thoughts About Her “Do What You Want (With My Body)” Duet With R. Kelly.

Lady Gaga now regrets the song she did together with the popular pervert, proliferater of pubescent pornography, and deflowerer of underage girls and perhaps small furry animals, R. Kelly. The Ga now says of her 2013 conjugal ditty, that 'Do What You...

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Tunnels Discovered On US/Mexico Border

Funny story: Tunnels Discovered On US/Mexico Border

President Donald Trump's border wall is to be the topic of a high-level meeting at the White House this evening, after it was reported that US Homeland Security officers have found several tunnels near the Mexican border. Two of the tunnels, near...

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A Look Back at Simpler Times When People Ate Rocks

Funny story: A Look Back at Simpler Times When People Ate Rocks

Aside from all the genocide, poverty, racism, sexism, and discrimination, it was a simpler, more innocent time growing up in the 1940s. Popular music still had trumpets in it, Shemp joined the Three Stooges, and kids played stickball in the streets.

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Hacker leaks Bolton in front of his bathroom mirror addressing himself as “Mr. President”

Funny story: Hacker leaks Bolton in front of his bathroom mirror addressing himself as “Mr. President”

The hacker group Dark Overbored has come forward with leaks of new details on the Trump presidency. The suspicion that the presidency has secretly changed hands from Mr. Trump to Mr. Bolton is bolstered by these leaks. At issue specifically is...

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Vatican Temporarily Sanctions American Suicide

Funny story: Vatican Temporarily Sanctions American Suicide

In a gesture of solidarity with politically-despondent Americans, the Vatican has announced that for the duration of Donald Trump's presidency, suicide by Americans will not be considered a mortal sin disqualifying them from eternal salvation. "We...

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Marks & Spencer Staff Barricade Themselves Inside Shop

Funny story: Marks & Spencer Staff Barricade Themselves Inside Shop

Staff at a Marks and Spencer store have taken the extraordinary step of barricading themselves in the shop, to prevent it being closed down. The store, in Hull, East Yorkshire, is one of seventeen M&S branches which is earmarked for closure as...

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Did Notre Dame v Southern Methodist Rivalry Create Religious Tension?

It's been three decades since the last game was played in one of the nation's great football rivalries. In 1989, Notre Dame's Fighting Irish beat Southern Methodist's Mustangs for the tenth time in a series that stretches back to the 1930s. SMU, near...

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Transit Security Administration Employee Brings Laser Focus to His Job at LaGuardia International Airport

Funny story: Transit Security Administration Employee Brings Laser Focus to His Job at LaGuardia International Airport

Transit Security Administration employee Mark Roberts brings laser-focused attention to detail to his position at LaGuardia International Airiport. “The second you put on that uniform, you gotta be on,” said Roberts. “That’s the job.” Among the...

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Nashville Fly Finally Finds a Place to Rest

Funny story: Nashville Fly Finally Finds a Place to Rest

A hectic world in which many pride themselves on being so busy that there’ll be “no flies resting on them” has made for rather a tough row to hoe for Nashville fly, Freddie Diptera. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m busy, too,” said the weary Freddie. "I'...

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Man Claims Cat Committed Suicide

Funny story: Man Claims Cat Committed Suicide

A cat that was killed on a busy road in the Battambang commune of Tapon late last night, may well have been a willing participant in the incident, it has been claimed. The cat, a mousy-colored thing, had been seen 'moping about', and looking sever...

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Nashville Man Encounters Trouble on Road Less Traveled

Funny story: Nashville Man Encounters Trouble on Road Less Traveled

In the interest of not becoming unthinking, unfeeling, and inescapably conventional. thirty-four-year-old Nate Black of Nashville, Tennessee, opted to take a more scenic, out-of-the-way route to his workplace, thinking that the less-traveled road mig...

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Satire Writer Stays True to His Art and Blows Opportunity for Financial Success

Funny story: Satire Writer Stays True to His Art and Blows Opportunity for Financial Success

Peter May, long-time writer of clever, witty, hard-hitting, little-read satire, was recently offered a chance at great financial success, but opted instead to stay true to his art - and broke. May’s fabulous professional opportunity came in the fo...

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Tory Knocking Shop Pimps Out Douchesse De Corbin

Funny story: Tory Knocking Shop Pimps Out Douchesse De Corbin

London - (Sassy Ass Mess): A Westminster purveyor of knobs and knocker knock-offs has rolled out its eagerly-anticipated 2019 brass neck collection from the revamped Douchesse de Corbin street door range. Douchesse is thought to have been named a...

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Emperor Qin Shi Trump Builds China's Great Wall

Peiping, China. 220 BC By executive order - which is the way emperors usually do things - Emperor Qin Shi Trump today began construction of a 5000-mile wall along China's border with the Mongolian steppes. Opposition to construction ceased when their...

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Airports To Use Their Own Drones To Attack Enemy Drones

Funny story: Airports To Use Their Own Drones To Attack Enemy Drones

Officials at Gatwick airport have welcomed a decision by the UK Civil Aviation Authority (CAA) to employ a squadron of drones at airports to combat drones being irresponsibly flown by members of the public. Gatwick was closed recently due to the a...

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Jesus Budda Nightclub Opens In Acapulco

Funny story: Jesus Budda Nightclub Opens In Acapulco

A deluxe new nightclub in the heart of the Mexican tourist resort of Acapulco is to open its doors for the first time on Friday. The 'Acapulco Apocalypso', is the brainchild of one-time social misfit and London gangland figure, Jesus Budda, who sp...

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Second English Civil War Is 'On The Cards'

Funny story: Second English Civil War Is 'On The Cards'

The English Civil War, which raged throughout the land in two periods between 1642 and 1651, was the last time the people of England were so divided on opinion that they had to revert to inflicting violence upon one another, but the current state of...

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Football Gossip: Borussia Dortmund Sniggers, Jobbygate, Craig Bellamy shock, Leeds pen?

Funny story: Football Gossip: Borussia Dortmund Sniggers, Jobbygate, Craig Bellamy shock, Leeds pen?

Borussia Dortmund officials are sniggering at Chelsea's profligacy as it was made official that United States international Christian Pulisic is now a Chelsea player for a fee of £58m. Pulisic will remain at Dortmund until the end of the current sea...

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President Trump: Who The F**k Does He Think He Is?

Funny story: President Trump: Who The F**k Does He Think He Is?

President Donald Trump has got it wrong about his wall. He should be made to shut up about it, before someone decides to shut him up, full stop. Those were the words of social commentator Myke Woodson this morning after Mr Trump went on TV to appeal to the American people about his godamned fucking wall, an idea so ridiculous, that if there were a God - if there were a God - He would strike dow...

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We had no idea Congressman who wore Blackface to Congressional Halloween party was a racist, say Republicans.

Senior Republicans last night said that they had no idea that Rep. Steve King was a racist even though he wore Blackface to their last Halloween party. Party leaders said that Mr King had shocked them to their cores after saying in a New York Time...

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April Fool!

Associated Press, February 7, 2019. Following his success in getting $5billion for his border wall, President Trump once again is threatening to shut down the federal government, this time over his demand that the U.S. Mint issue quarters, half dollars and silver dollars stamped with his likeness. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer have labelled this demand a “ch...

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Mitt Won't Run? But Here's His Campaign Song

Exclusive to The Spoof. In a scathing Washington Post op-ed attack on President Donald Trump, freshman senator and former Republican presidential candidate, Mitt Romney, made clear that he's the party's only alternative to Trump in the 2020 primarie...

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Fear Of Youth

A crisis of confidence has gripped youth players across the world’s top leagues. With the news that Manchester United have sacked manager, Jose Mourinho, there is now a real fear that he could rock up at any of the world’s top clubs and ruin their yo...

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Bugseye Pelosi vs Flyface

Funny story: Bugseye Pelosi vs Flyface

BILLINGSGATE POST: A horse’s head is a horse’s head, of course, of course. If this ain’t news, I will eat your shorts. Some two months ago it was reported that Mafiosa lioness, the notorious Bugseye Pelosi, dumped a horse’s head on the bed of Do...

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Similarities Between Fox News/the Republican Party and the Church of Scamatology

Funny story: Similarities Between Fox News/the Republican Party and the Church of Scamatology

Sociologists who examine cult phenomena have noticed similarities between the techniques of the Trump administration, the Republican Party, and Fox News: 1. They all illogically follow a leader who tells obvious falsehoods and is a blatant narcissicist and misogynist. 2. They both push books, supposedly instructive, that are loaded with bullshit. 3. The Trump administration and the "Chur...

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Man Got Drunk, Sat In A Wheelbarrow, And Cried For His Mommy

Funny story: Man Got Drunk, Sat In A Wheelbarrow, And Cried For His Mommy

Christmas isn't always a happy time, and, for some people, it can be a period of downright misery. This was the case with one man on Christmas Day, when the pressure of his work, the failure of his relationship, and the alienation and isolation of being left all alone by the death of his mother earlier in the year, conspired against him. Roy Boggins, 57, a self-employed builder, woke up on Chri...

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Easier For Terrorists To Board Planes Than Walk Into United States

Funny story: Easier For Terrorists To Board Planes Than Walk Into United States

Taxpayers are all asking: Why is Trump making it easier for terrorists to board a plane than to walk into the United States? Inquiring minds need to know. Inquiring is sometimes spelled with an 'e' thanks to Trump pal, David Pecker. If terrorists, ISIS members, gangsters, drug dealers and “lots of other really bad people,” threaten the safety of the United States by crossing the border, shouldn’t...

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You Know You're Old When ---

YOU KNOW YOU'RE OLD, AND MAYBE AN OLD SOUTHERN CALIFORNIAN... When none of the names on the senior golf tour are familiar If you can remember using a fountain pen When a successful morning is a satisfactory bowel movement If you remember riding on the running board of your Dad's car If you recall smudge falling on laundry hanging on the clothes line When you come across blue c...

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Guns Are Safe But Trump Cages Children

Funny story: Guns Are Safe But Trump Cages Children

According to the news, Trump says guns are safe. However, children ripped away from their mother's arms belong in cages for weeks or months. “I’m getting the word from lots and lots of children that they love being put in cages. It’s like their s...

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'Most beautiful girl in the world' awarded royal title of 'most beautiful face'

Funny story: 'Most beautiful girl in the world' awarded royal title of 'most beautiful face'

An ordinary person who once held the rank of the "most beautiful girl", is now getting a royal title for being the "most beautiful face in the world." Julie Nutbanger, the daughter of artist, Patrick Nutbanger, and French fashion designer Veronika...

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Hackers expose bogus WaPo broadsheets as “supplemental expansion” of mainstream media propaganda ploy

Funny story: Hackers expose bogus WaPo broadsheets as “supplemental expansion” of mainstream media propaganda ploy

Responding to fake news WaPo editions currently circulating in Washington, the hacker group Dark Overbored has stepped forward once again. This time Dark Overbored argues the fake editions are the latest (hidden) establishment efforts to undo th...

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At My Age, How Long Will I Live?

A SPOOF OP-ED. The IRS has sent out its latest life expectancy guess, the formula for stealing money from the IRA accounts of those over 70. That's the age at which you must start withdrawing money from your nest egg. Those under 70 merely have to consult the Internet to answer their curiosity about their longevity, and Google's websites are probably more accurate than what IRS uses for senior cit...

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David Cameron has amassed a sex doll collection

Funny story: David Cameron has amassed a sex doll collection

David Cameron who has amassed a collection of ten silicon sex dolls has insisted that he does not care about being labelled a “genius” and he regards the dolls as his surrogate girlfriends. “My love for my dolls is a manly responsibility,” said Ca...

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