Boris Johnson "Groped Queen"

Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 3 October 2019

image for Boris Johnson "Groped Queen"
Johnson's zip down, revealing a selection of 'dirty spuds'

British Prime Minister Boris Johnson is in deep trouble this morning, after the number of women alleging sexual assault against him rose to three - the latest being Her Majesty the Queen.

Her Royal Highness has said that, during her meeting with the PM in August, when he asked her to suspend Parliament, he laid his hands on her "in several places", and either smiled or grinned whilst doing so.

Once, he winked.

Further details are unavailable, but Johnson's initial handshake may have been too long.

And his flyhole may have been open.

Johnson already faces an investigation over an allegation that he groped Sunday Times journalist, Charlotte Edwardes, in 1999, and the idea that he may have pawed the leader of the Realm will not sit easily with many of Her subjects.

Buckingham Palace officials have labelled the PM "a lout", and someone who should "give his head a wobble".

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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