TERMINATOR 9 - New Schwarzenegger Movie

Funny story written by Zabdgrov667

Sunday, 27 October 2019

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LGBTQXYZ+ Sex Cyborg - Unstoppable in Bed ... "will take on all comers"

HOLLYWOOD, CA - In 1984, "Terminator" was the stunning Sci-Fi action movie which put humanity in a life-and-death struggle against the ultimate killing machine of the future, made by man and perfected by Artificial Inteligence. Arnold Schwarzenegger played the role of the Cyberdyne Systems Series T-800 Model 101, a cyborg tasked with preventing the existence of a future leader.

Although much of this "Terminator" installment uses the general plot line of "BOOM-KAK-KAK-KAK-BOOM-BOOM-dead-bodies-everywhere", two aspects of the movie are worth noting. First, two of the central actors are OLD, and little effort is made by the make-up department to conceal the fact. Second, after all previous efforts to destroy humanity through Global Thermo-Nuclear War fail, the Artificial Intelligence determines that a new strategy is required - ULTIMATE PORN.

The Cyberdyne AI reviews its assumptions and environmental data models at the beginning of the movie, creating an Alternate Global Model where it projects for a "Theory of Doing Nothing":

    "No Action" Analysis Chicago - Confirm Elevated Human Death Count....
    "No Action" Analysis L.A. - Confirm Elevated Human Death Count....
    "No Action" Analysis Syria - Confirm Elevated Human Death Count....
    "No Action" Analysis Mexico - Confirm Elevated Human Death Count....

Too Many Babies

In the 1984 movie, the Artificial Intelligence expected Global Thermo-Nuclear War as a 100% probability, so the most logical way to destroy humanity was by the "perfection" of warfare. However, the humans never "disappear", and the Cyberdyne Systems AI realizes that BABIES keep "popping up." In a microsecond, multi-vector data analysis establishes a 100% correlation for "Babies-to-Human-Vaginas" (with an emphasis on "Sluts"). No matter how many people shoot other people, and no matter how many people blow up other people, there are always "more babies."

Skynet subordinates its US Strategic Global Digital Defense Network and the related military assets. PORN-NET becomes the ultimate goal, with development of two new cyborg models: T-69XXX and T-69LGBTQXYZ+

If John Connor's Resistance Movement changes, Cyberdyne can win by humans dying through attrition. If John Connor's number one mission is "Get-Your-Freak-On", then John and his followers can "bang" the Cyberdyne Sexbots, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, but the power-cells in the cyborg units will still outlast the humans by 20 years.

T-69XXX model is the hottest optimization of porn star behavior, which can mimic 64 "primary modes" such as Virgin, Spoiled Rich Girl, MILF, Trailer Park Slut, Goth Lolita, and more.

T-69LGBTQXYZ+ model "will do anything" (aka. "Crazy Bitch"), is driven by Chaos Theory decision processes, and has a "primary mode" of Steam-Punk.

In addition to the standard movie trailer, one clip has gotten more views than others.

Clip "Sodom-a-tor" - Open with T-69LGBTQXYZ+ "driving" from behind ("Doggie Style").... Cut to Police Investigator who says "That's the BIGGEST Smile I ever saw on a dead body."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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