Bezos Takes Over National Enquirer and Merges it With Washington Post

Written by Al N.

Friday, 15 February 2019

image for Bezos Takes Over National Enquirer and Merges it With Washington Post
The National Enquirer still makes people want to hide their faces.

Although it was thought that the National Enquirer would become the advertising insert of the venerable Washington Post, it turns out it is actually to become more of a print version of Amazon.com.

Bezos has long envied the Enquirer's place on the newstands, and when it wanted to settle after the multitude of lawsuits Jeff Bezos of Amazon launched, Bezos ended up in control of the Enquirer.

If you think that the Enquirer is done muck-raking, don't forget that Bezos has ended up with the secret files kept in the deep dark safe in David Pecker's repossessed office. In fact, Bezos first sent a bomb patrol in to check it before entering, and they were able to disable all the booby-traps Pecker had set.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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