Spoof news stories from January 2010
There were 1,557 spoof news stories published in January 2010. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Three Reported Missing After Animal Rights Activists Take "War on Leather" to Motorcycle Gang Rally.
Johnstown, PA: Local and state police scoured the hills outside rural Johnstown, Pennsylvania, after reports of three animal rights activists going missing after attempting to protest the wearing of leather at a large motorcycle gang rally this weeke...
Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens Get Matching Intimate Tattoos
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Zac Efron and his girlfriend Vanessa Hudgens at first denied the rumor about them having matching tattoos, but both have since admitted that the tattoo rumor is actually true.
Zac said that the reason that he denied it at first wa...
Taylor Lautner to Taylor Swift: "Put out or get out!"
ROANOKE, VA (ABSNN) -- Monsignor Francois Dubois, S.J. admitted that he was involved in "couple's intervention" with the two Taylors, Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift.
"I am just assisting the youngster in probing the true depths of their budding r...
Taylor Swift to Taylor Lautner: "I've seen bigger on a three-month old!"
NEW YORK CITY (ABSNN) -- What was to be a fantasy come true, two Taylors in one bed, making hot, sweaty sex (and for one, the first time) became a bitter, howling fist fight that landed both stars in the NYC pokey!
Things began well enough, said s...
Taylor Lautner and Ex-Girlfriend Taylor Swift To Film A Condom Commercial
HOLLYWOOD - One of the stars of The Twilight Saga: New Moon, Taylor Lautner has agreed to film a public service condom commercial with his ex-girlfriend country singer Taylor Swift.
Both Taylor's agreed to do the commercial, which is entirely sanc...
Infant Arrested For Terrorism At Airport, Sent To Gitmo
New York, NY-- A three-week old infant was arrested by TSA workers today on suspicion of terrorism. The airport security workers said the infant was murmuring strange words as he tried to board a plane to Mexico with his parents. The parents were a...
Taylor Swift to Get Breast Implants, Says "Nobody Will Dump Me With Big Titties"
A boob job is in the works for country music star and actress Taylor Swift. The six foot tall singer, famous for her big hair and not-so-big rack, said that her lack of breasts are one of the things that led to her recent break up with movie heartth...
Robert Pattinson: Stage Shocks Made Illegal For Twilight Eclipse
The recently reported "secret" of the actor's surprised, shocked looks in Twilight One & Two has been declared illegal by the Board of Movie Makers, according to star Robert Pattinson.
"It has worked great in the first two movies but we'll hav...
Robert Pattinson, Kristy Stewart Reveal Secret Of The "Twilight" Series
A major secret on the set of the Twilight movies is something most producers and directors may have never tried, according to two of it's star's, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart.
"If you noticed the shocked expressions on some of our faces it...
Conjoined Twins Marry Conjoined Twins, Having Sex Problems
Conjoined twins Berniece and Euniece Watson's recent marriage to conjoined twins, Jack And Goff Spume has gotten off to a rocky start. At least on their wedding night.
The fire department had to come and later, the rescue squad, both having it's h...
Vanessa Perroncel = Porn Ass Relevance Says Mrs John Terry
London - (Offside Rule): Toni Poole has hit out at the sordid sex revelations about her lying, cheating footballer husband John Terry and French actress Vanessa Perroncel.
The England captain's wife said she'd consulted a medium about her marriage...
Didier Drogba's wife gives birth to a white baby!
Doctor's at the Chelsea & Westminster Hospital were astounded late last night when Alla, the wife of Didier Drogba, gave birth to a white baby boy!
Drogba, the Ivory Coast and Chelsea striker, was absolutely overjoyed with the new arrival and...
Breakfast Presenter Susanna Reid Criticized For Showing Off Her Puppies
LONDON - Breakfast presenter Susanna Reid has received quite a bit of criticism for showing a little too much of her puppies during an interview.
Reid was interviewing actor Hugh Grant in a rather low-cut mossy green dress. She asked Grant what he...
Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens To Star In "High School Musical 4 - The Baby Bump Years"
HOLLYWOOD - Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens have just confirmed that they have agreed to star in the fourth installment of the High School Musical series.
High School Musical 4 - The Baby Bump Years follows Troy Bolton and Gabriella Montez after the...
Kevin Jonas & New Bride Danielle Expecting First Baby
Recently married Kevin Jonas, apparently making up for lost time as a virgin, has knocked up his young wife Danielle according to reports out of Hollywood this morning.
The newlywed bride reportedly told friends of her family that Kevin was a wild...
Dallas Cheerleaders Will Now Be Wearing Bikini Thongs Instead of Short Shorts
DALLAS - It has been announced that due to the thousands of emails, text messages, and phone calls that he has been receiving lately, a top football team decided to drop the cheerleaders standard white short shorts and replace them with white bikini...
Oprah Winfrey Shocks Her Audience By Revealing She Has A Tattoo
CHICAGO - Oprah Winfrey shocked her television audience in the studio and at home when she revealed a secret that she has been keeping for several years.
The queen of the daytime talk shows told stunned viewers that several years ago she did somet...
Apple iPad Attacks Amazon Kindle2, Chaos Erupts
A San Francisco parking lot was the scene of the altercation yesterday. Onlookers agreed that the iPad had started the fight. The Kindle2 was walking along, minding its own business, when the iPad struck.
"It was an attack, pure and simple," a...
Kristen Stewart too horny for Breaking Dawn?
Twilight Actress, Kristen Stewart, was sent off the set for getting too into a mock scene for the fourth instalment of the twilight saga.
I have an inside source who is here to tell us what went down in the house of twilight.
neongreen1397: "so what happenened with K. Stew and R. Pat?"
insider: "Robert and Kristen had to do a mock scene- this is where the do a like a sample of each...
Adam Lambert Admits He Had Penis Enlargement Surgery
Reigning American Idol Runner-Up and all around gay guy Adam Lambert admitted to reporters that he had elective surgery on his recent concert tour of Southeast Asia. "When I stopped off in Bangkok, Thailand, I decided to take advantage of their medi...
Robert Pattinson Chips Tooth On A Hair, Apparently
According to his Twilight Series: Eclipse co-star, Bryce Dallas Houston Howard, Robert Pattison, the British James Dean(?), chipped a tooth while flossing.
Bryce revealed the information after New York, New York Magazine asked her about the big sc...
American Idol Has Found The Next Kellie Pickler - Vanessa Wolfe
ATLANTA - American Idol never fails to deliver. For those individuals who have been wondering who is going to be the next Kellie Pickler, well you can stop wondering.
Simon Cowell and company have found her. She's 19-year-old Tennessee girl Vaness...
Corporate Mission Statements For Our Modern Times
Mission statements are a modern attempt to give meaning and a face to a corporation's work in its never ending pursuit of profits. They are a statement on a business's real intents and purposes. Supposedly. The problem is that the face it makes is lopsided and the meaning is muddled. If they were to say what their real intents and interests are, they would probably look something like this:
To...
Man With World's Largest Penis And Woman With World's Largest Vagina Axed By TV Channel - First Anniversary Update.
On the first anniversary of one of the decade's leading news stories, top reporter Dick Dirtbox and a couple of his drinking cronies held a press conference to announce the latest developments in the continuing saga of the man with the world's larges...
Taylor Swift Challenges Rachel McAdams and Keira Knightley To See Who Has Smallest Boobs
Taylor Swift is tired of the comparisons and is throwing down the gauntlet. She has challenged other young starlets Rachel McAdams and Keira Knightley to see which one has the smallest breasts.
"I'm sick of being compared to them. I want the dis...
Airport Scanners may prove to "discover" a new star
Recent reports to local news avenues have said that most people are not even aware that the new security scanners can actually see their naked bodies.
If you are not a terrorist with bombs concealed on your body you have nothing to fear of this ne...
Zac Efron And Vanessa Hudgens Worked As CIA Moles
The latest astonishing claim to surface here in tinseltown concerns covert activities from teen matinee idols Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens whilst they were reportedly working for the CIA on Black Ops in the middle East.
Unconfirmed reports claim...
Taylor Swift Already Dating Joe Jonas
That was a quick three-month fling that Taylor Swift had with Taylor Lautner and the paparazzi loved the double-Taylor headlines but it now appears that Taylor Swift has had her eye on Joe Jonas for some time.
Even though Joe spent the Christmas h...
The Truth Behind Roger Federer and Maria Sharapova's Pussy
It was a dark and stormy night, Roger Federer's wife had just put their baby down after a late night feeding. Roger was walking through the living room of their Melbourne time share in the dark when he felt something furry under his foot. A loud yowl...
'Bad Girls' 3D Porn System Signs Conjoined Twins To Headline New Blockbuster Skin Flick: "ClusterF*****!"
Following the lead of blockbuster 'Avatar', now with over $500M banked in just a few short weeks in the midst of a global recession, a group of Follywood Porn Promoters have come out with a complete 3D Home Porno Entertainment Center which they are...
Has shagging Vanessa Perroncel made John Terry the poor man's Tiger Woods?
London - (Offside Mess): She's a luscious, silken-bodied French underwear model; he's captain of Chelsea and England - and worth a bob or two.
But is this silly shagging caper really the new Tiger Woods?
As the UK tabloids pitch for a slice o...
Taylor Swift Admits To Mastectomy As First Part of Sex Change, But Said Nobody Noticed
Country Music singer Taylor Swift has admitted that frustration over her breakup with boyfriend Taylor Lautner caused her to take what she now considers radical steps. Upset with her body, the young woman says that she strongly considered a sex chan...
Cheryl Cole tests DNA positive for Simon Cowell's daughter
London - (Gonads): "Talent, charisma, star quality? Who needs 'em? With a secret birth Pa like Simon Cowell you can have it all!"
That's this week's LA FagHagSlagMag's lead article as alleged singer, songwriter, dancer, fashion designer, author,...
Donkey With Large Penis Gets 7-Yr. Old Student In Trouble
In Memphis, Tennessee, a young second grade student has gotten into trouble after the teacher asked the students to draw a Holiday scene.
The boy handed his in, showing a manger scene with a donkey with a huge penis that fell to the floor.
Th...
Letterman Literally Begs Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens To Appear On His Show
NEW YORK CITY - The stars of The Twilight Saga: New Moon movie series, Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens recently appeared on The Late Show with David Letterman.
David, of the tassled hair, reportedly personally called up Efron and Hudgens himself and...
Damned Trolls Interrupted My 'Nude Big Brother Twins Pics Eclipse Vanessa Hudgens' Tribute Story!
London - (Trolling Mess): "I was just about to start writing the raunchy sequel to my Nude Big Brother Twins' Pics Eclipse Vanessa Hudgens story," Spoof writer Queen Mudder said today, "but a recent flame war by anonymous cyber bottom-feeders in the...
Ava-Monroe Johnson's Kazakh relatives in Dannielynn Birkhead-esque legacy fight
Los Angeles - (Reuterus): Fears of a Borat-style Kazakh custody and inheritance farce loom over the bereaved Johnson family.
So far there's little actual likelihood of a Virgie Arthur/Judge Larry Seidlin/Howard K Stern/Larry Birkhead public punchu...
Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens Have Been Asked To Sing The National Anthem At The Super Bowl
MILWAUKEE - One of the most popular duos in America Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens were in the 'Beer City' on a promotional tour for their movie The Twilight Saga: New Moon.
Efron and Hudgens have been to 20 different cities in the past 20 days. Za...
Tennessee Volunteers Search For New Head Football Coach, Boise State's Peterson First on List
The abrupt departure of head football coach Lane Kiffin to USC has prompted the search for a replacement at the University of Tennessee. The Volunteers are scrambling to find someone else just one year after hiring Kiffin to replace Phil Fulmer.
Miley Cyrus , Selena Gomez, and Demi Lovato To Appear In New Reality Show Called "We Were Just 17"
HOLLYWOOD - Teenage music queens Miley Cyrus, Selena Gomez, and Demi Lovato have all been signed to star in the new reality show on the Teen Girl Network (TGN) called We Were Just 17.
Miley said that the title was taken from a line in the Beatles...
Lady Gaga and Elton John Practice Duet for Grammys
Observers report that the dress rehearsal for the 23-year-old Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta and the 62-year-old Reginald Kenneth Dwight went quite smoothly.
At first the performers were quite formal with each other, so the form of address...
Tiger Woods - Derek Jeter Gay Sexcapades Exposes Bi-Sexual Tiger
Celeb Jihad is now reporting the surfacing of Tiger Woods' hottest butt slapping adventures and worst nightmare- the exposure of them- and perhaps the true explanation as to why his sponsors have gone into permanent hiding - just as Tiger has.
T...
The Selena Gomez Purity Ring Is Breaking Sales Records
HOLLYWOOD - The national Who's Buying What Product Agency has reported that at present the number one selling item is The Selena Gomez Purity Ring.
They say that it has even surpassed The Miley Cyrus - Hannah Montana Lunchbox, The Demi Lovato Inst...
Serena Williams wears no knickers at Aussie Open, her bum flashed all over the world causing a male heart-attack pandemic!
Serena Williams, pretty good tennis player and wearer of flashy tennis wear has really shocked the world this time out!
Down-under is not "DOWN-UNDER" any more, Serena has flashed it all.
Every time she received, bent over, grunted, smashed, se...
Cindy McCain and Daughter Meghan McCain Agree To Pose Nude
NOGALES, Arizona - Senator John McCain's wife, Cindy and their daughter Meghan were in town visiting one of Mrs. McCain's seven mansions.
Mother and daughter had a great time enjoying the noon-time Mexican food buffet at Senor Pancho Villa's Mexic...
Federer Refuses to Shake Hands with Tiger at Australian Open
Sydney - Down under you might think that Tiger Woods reputation might actually be seen as a macho achievement, but not in the eyes of Roger Federer.
Tiger's tennis pal apparently snubbed the Tiger after he finished his semi-final with Tsongas. He...
Chris Brown Snubbed with News of Rihanna's New Dodger Boyfriend
Still trying to mend fences with his former plaintiff/victim girlfriend Rihanna, Chris Brown was shocked at the news that Los Angeles Dodger outfielder, Matt Kemp, has been dating her in recent weeks.
Though Rihanna was not reached for comment on...
Danyl Johnson, Olly Murs, and Lloyd Daniel Join To Form Boy Band - X-Factory
LONDON - Simon Cowell, CEO of 19th Hole Productions and ex-boyfriend of Pixie Lott, has verified the rumor that had been circulating between London and Portsmouth. Three of this years X-Factor male contestants have joined to form a trio.
The three...
Johnson family's tough love 'reduced Casey to Brooke Astor squalor'
Los Angeles - (Chaos Theory): A celebwatch website has accused Casey Johnson's billionaire family of practising a tough love dogma that lead to her death by squalor.
LA FagHaghSlagMag's lead column said today that just like Brooke Astor the carrot...
X-Factor's Joe McElderry Admits He's Dating Lindsay Lohan
GUSTAVIA, St. Barts - X-Factor winner Joe McElderry has admitted that the rumors are true. He is in fact dating the infamous LiLo, Lindsay Lohan.
Joe was seen at The Wet Willie Swimsuit Shop in Gustavia walking hand in hand with LiLo as she shoppe...
Jay Reatard's death at 29 finally knocks Tila Tequila off her twittering perch
Memphis - (OMG!) The sudden, unexpected death in his sleeep of garage rock nihilist Jimmy Lee Lindsay - aka Jay Reatard - has finally upstaged Tila Tequila's manic twitterings.
The musician died mysteriously at home in Memphis on Wednesday - with...
Cheryl Cole Wins SeX Factor's Galaxy Class Ass Contest; Passes Kate Beckensale for Most Beautiful Woman Awards
The ever attractive and multi-talented Cheryl "Tweety" Cole has rocketed to fabulous fame and fortune time and time again over the last four years and has done it yet again, winning SeX Factor's Contest for the Best Galaxy Class Ass.
The Dynamic D...
Kristen Stewart Buys Robert Pattinson A Texas Cattle Ranch
LAREDO, Texas - Kristen Stewart recently flew down to Texas and checked out some South Texas ranches that she had seen for sale on eBay.
She stated that she knows how much her Twilight co-star Robert Pattinson loves to do the "Cowboy Thing" so she...
Twilight's Ashley Green Posing Nude Again
Ashley Greene, fresh from the Twilight New Moon blockbuster, is posing nude for her new role in Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Special, sort of. How can she sort of pose in the nude? Well, let's admit that she IS totally in the nude, but there is a cost...
'Naked' And 'Sex' Are Hot Topics Says Beyonce - Cheryl Cole Agrees
At last. It's official. 'Naked' and 'Sex' can come out of the closet without fear of reprisals because they are HOT TOPICS, as was confirmed tonight by Beyonce, and seconded by Cheryl Cole.
This applies even moreso on satirical websites and on sea...
'No Brittany Murphy' Casey Johnson OD'd on Tequila?
Los Angeles - (Propofool): LA pathologists were piecing together today Casey Johnson's final hungover hours.
Reports claim she'd lain in a coma for nearly a week 'before fiancee Tila Tequila reckoned she could be dead.'
Three weeks previously t...
Chad Ochocinco to Change Name--Again
Cincinnati Bengals wide-receiver Chad Ochocinco (whose last name used to be Johnson) has stated he will change is name again to Chad NumeroUno despite what NFL commission Roger Goodell has to say about it.
"He can't stop me," Ochocinco said. "He c...
Mila Kunis Says She'll Wed Macaulay Culkin On Valentine's Day
SANTA MONICA - The former star of That 70's Show, Mila Kunis informed her manicurist that she will become Mrs. Macaulay Culkin, on February 14, 2010.
The 26-year-old Kunis, which rhymes with 'Boonies,' said that she has decided that it is time for...
Kate Middleton Elopes With Prince Harry
Saint Croix, VI-- Kate Middleton has finally snagged herself a prince. The raven-haired beauty eloped last night with her longtime beau's baby brother. In the worst fraternal betrayal since Cain killed Abel, Prince Harry married Prince William's gi...
Many of Hollywood's Breast Actresses Upset That They Were Not Invited to Smallest Boobs Competition, Saying It's A Big Deal
Several high profile Hollywood Actresses are upset that they were not invited to compete in a "smallest boobs" contest between Taylor Swift, Keira Knightley, and Rachel McAdams.
These "A" list women (in more ways than one) say that this competit...
Big Feud Erupts As Cheryl Cole Mentions Lily Allen's Third Nipple
LONDON - Cheryl Cole was asked about the song which Lily Allen wrote which mentions her in the lyrics as well as in the title.
Cheryl replied that she thought that it was nice of Lily to mention her in her song "Cheryl Tweedy."
But when Cheryl...
Horror in Haiti Earthquake hits in the land of Voodoo
A major earthquake in Haiti has caused the deaths of hundreds of people there are also reports of thousands buried in the rubble. Its the strongest earthquake to hit Haiti since 1770.
A voodoo master Dr De Prince has claimed that this earthquake i...
John Edwards/Rielle Hunter sex tape 'a hoax' says Hollywood madam Michelle Braun
Los Angeles - (Savage in Limbo): "It's just a lil ole tongue-in-cheek teaser," the former Hollywood brothelkeeper chuckled today, "shot by pals of Jay McInerney!"
Braun was talking to reporters following the release of Zaprudder-like footage of Se...
Zac and Vanessa To Perform For The U.S. Troops In Detroit
HOLLYWOOD - Zac Efron's agent has just confirmed that he and Vanessa Hudgens have agreed to perform a concert for the American combat troops currently stationed in Detroit.
Hayden Applebocker, Efron's agent said that he has been approached by the...
Naked Breast Pics To Be Axed By Tabloids
For over thirty years now, the British tabloid press have been entertaining the working men of Britain with topless photographs of nubile nymphettes, usually tucked just inside the front page on page 3 or page 5 or in some instances, on every single...
'Twilight' Movies Really Good - Pattinson And Stewart Excellent - Gervais And Dee
It was something of a surprise when British comedians Ricky Gervais and Jack Dee - both renowned for their sardonic wit - came out unanimously in support of the Twilight movies starring teen heart-throbs Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart.
Speak...
Ashley Cole Ticketed For Driving His Lamborghini At 104 MPH!
LONDON - Chelsea football star Ashley Cole and his wife Cheryl were merely out driving to get some fish and chips when they were stopped by London police on the A3, aka The Portsmouth Road.
The officer Bardolf Crownridge informed Mr. Cole that he...
Jimmy Saville's midnight hospital dash
Sir Jimmy Savile was involved in a midnight hospital dash last night. Night porters at local hospital St Nicks were startled during the nightshift, when they heard strange noises coming from one of the rooms.
One porter, who does not wish to be na...
Too Many Cooks Spoil Broth
"La Shite", the upscale local restaurant specialising in shite food has gone into liquidation after blowing a wad of cash by buying in a bunch of TV chefs purely for a publicity stunt.
Ugly, craggy-faced gonad-featured Gordon Ramsey, Marco-Pierre...
Elin Nordegren Visits Tiger In Mississippi - Says She Probably Won't Divorce The Man Ho
HATTIESBURG, Mississippi - Elin Nordegren traveled to the Delta state to visit her husband, Tiger Woods, who is in rehab to cure him of Dickaliticus, which is the inherent urge to try and poke every white female of pokeable age.
Elin, who still an...
Alex Reid Wins Celebrity Big Brother - Katie Price Buys Him A 16th Century Castle
LONDON - Cage-fighter Alex Reid emerged victorious in this years edition of Celebrity Big Brother.
The 34-year-old Reid upon being announced as the winner quickly proclaimed that Katie Price is not only the love of his life, and the woman of his d...
Taylor Lautner "Death Rumor" A Hoax
It appears Twilight star Taylor Lautner has finally beaten Robert Pattinson to something finally, according to news all over the internet...no not Kristen Stewart, but "Death!
That is, if you believe the current internet death hoax doing the round...
Meghan McCain comforts ex-squeeze Tila Tequila
Los Angeles - (MuffBuff): Dirty Sexy Politics: A True Story author Meghan McCain is back in LA comforting a bereaved Tila Tequila.
The daughter of GOP presidential candidate 2008 John McCain and his wife Sindeep (sic) broke off an exploratory good...
Miley Cyrus, Taylor Swift, And Amy Winehouse To Perform On 47-City U.S. - U.K. Tour
LOS ANGELES - The On The Road Again Concert Promoters Agency of Pasadena, California has just informed the music media that Miley Cyrus, Taylor Swift, and Amy Winehouse have all agreed to a 47-city concert tour of the United States and the United Kin...
Jon and Kate make nice with new show
The Home and Food network announced today that Jon and Kate Gosselin have agreed to star in a new show for the network. The couple will be reviewing restaurants in the Los Angeles area.
The new show will be called "Jon and Kate Just Ate," a parod...
Angelina Loses It After Drunken Naked Brad Pitt Shows Up At Door
According to neighbors, there was a big fight a couple of weeks ago in which they could not help overhearing from standing in their yards in the wind and snow.
"It's not everyday that you see a drunken nude Brad Pitt get out of a car and go up t...
Casey Johnson's will 'leaves half $$$s fortune to Tila Tequila'
Los Angeles - (Probate Mess): Reports from an LA attorney's office claim deceased socialite and pharma heiress Casey Johnson left half her $30 million trust fund to fiancee Tila Tequila.
The December 2009 will was drafted shortly after the gals go...
Planet X seen on Xmas day
A whistleblower at NASA claims that they have discovered planet X or Nibiru and have calculated that it is heading our way.
Scientists at NASA claim that Planet X showed up clearly on Xmas day on various powerful telescopes throughout the World bu...
Washington Redskins Hire Mike Shanahan As New Head Coach
Mike Shanahan was announced this morning as the new head coach of the Washington Redskins. The team, which has had 119 head coaches under owner Dan Snyder, announced that Shanahan would begin work immediately to rebuild the former once proud dynasty...
"Man" Changes Mind After Sex Change Operation
M. Woods of England (first name withheld upon request) moved to Thailand last year to complete gender reassignment surgery (more commonly known as a sex change operation). The male comedy writer said that he wanted to be a woman, and had felt that w...
Joan Rivers Barred From Boarding An Airplane In Costa Rica Because She's The Wrong Gender
BANANAVILLE, Costa Rica - Comedienne Joan Rivers was not allowed to board a plane bound for Newark, New Jersey because her passport read Joseph Rosenberg instead of Joan Rosenberg her real name.
The airline agent identified as Eppie De La Nutterwo...
Man City Table Leeds United Bid
World's richest football club Manchester City have shocked the footballing community this afternoon ahead of the January transfer window by slapping in a transfer bid to buy the entire Leeds United team after the Yorkshiremen defeated City's city riv...
Latest fitness rage for 2010, "SEXCERCISE" keeps you thin, shiny, healthy and HARD!
Scientists, at long last have proven what every (hetro) man and women wants to hear: SEX, SEX, AND EVEN MORE SEX keeps you fitter than all of the torturous exercising and plastic surgery.
SEXCERCISE, is the latest rave to be medically proven as t...
Following Avitar's 3D success the first 3D porno film, a remake of Caligula, is about too "ejaculate" upon the world!
After the resounding success of Avatar in 3D the first 3D porno film is about to be "ejaculated" upon the world.
Tino Brass, Italien director of flop Caligula is making a 3D porno version of the film. In its original it was plain porno, now with 3...
Robert Pattinson, You'll Want To "Eat Him Up" Also!
In his first big time role in advertisement, where people such as Michael Jordan, Peyton Manning and others have made a fortune, Robert Pattinson of the Twilight movies is about to sign a contract with Madison Avenue Cosmetics for their new line of "...
American Idol: 62-Year-Old General Larry Platt Performs "Pants On The Ground"
ATLANTA - General Larry Platt, at 62, is a little over the 28-year-old age limit, but he certainly brought the American Idol auditioning house down with his original song ditty.
The Platter, as his 103-year-old grandmother Hattie Henrietta Platt c...
Cheryl Cole's Lips Suddenly Double In Size - Mick Jagger Is Jealous
LONDON - X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole was spotted at London's Heathrow Airport with a pair of lips that Mick Jagger, Angelina Jolie, and Lisa Rinna would all be jealous of.
Cole was asked about the sudden fullness in her lips but made no comment. Ac...
Patriots Lose, Tom Brady Wears Black Underwear
The New England Patriots 33-14 loss to the Baltimore Ravens in the playoffs eliminates the chance for a possible fourth Super Bowl for Bill Belichick and Tom Brady. Viewers who tuned in to watch this gridiron battle noted Tom Brady's obviously black...
Lady Sovereign 4 Big Brother
It was announced this week that Lady Sovereign will be appearing in this years Big Brother.
It's nice to see that channel 4 are branching out with their ideas and have gone for Celebrity Tramp Big Brother this year rather than the more traditional...
Taylor Lautner As Spiderman, In Spiderman 4?
Not only is Taylor Lautner not dead from a Cocaine overdose as was rumored this past weekend, but the wolf man from Twilight may have gotten the role of Spiderman according to the latest from Insiders in Hollywood.
Of course, those same sources h...
Tennessee ' Volunteers' Can't Get Anyone to Take Over Trashed Football Program!
The NCCA is investigating the possibility of reducing the University of Tennessee's football program to Division III level after the recent departure of Coach Lane Kiffin, and the inability of the Athletic Department to find a replacement after conta...
The Bachelor Boots Off The Only Non-Caucasian Woman (Hmmmmm)
HOLLYWOOD - Season 14 of The Bachelor started off with this years lucky guy getting his pick from a record-breaking 73 girls.
This years lone male on the 2010 edition of The Bachelor - On The Wings of Love, is Jake Pavelka, a pilot from Dallas, wh...
Tiger Woods Has Face Bleached, Nose Redone
Perhaps all the recent goings-on have caused the talented golfer to go a little bananas but a source close to Tiger has told us that Tiger Woods has bleached his face till it's whiter and had a nose job.
He also wants custody of the kids so he ca...
Much Controversy Over Taylor Swift New Double Album: "Best Of Country"
No one does country music like new sensation, Taylor Swift, no matter if it's a slow ballad or a tail-shaking boot stomping boogie! But the selections on her latest, "The Best Of Country" is leaving several people shaking their heads.
Swift told r...
The truth behind Tsonga
So Jo-Wilfried Tsonga, the testosterone driven french tennis player, who came into limelight sometime last year after beating Rafael Nadal in the semi finals of the Australian Open seems to have exposed his secret of success.
After days/months of...
Kate Gosselin: "My new hair extensions make me look six kids younger, don't you think?"
"I could never have longhair before," explained Kate Gosselin as she sat in a hair salon chair admiring her new hair extensions with a handheld mirror. "You know, because Jon always kept getting bubble gum, popsicle sticks or his sticky fingers stuck up all in it. That's how I ended up with that crazy looking hairdo. I was always having to cut it and all the time it kept getting shorter and shorte...
Tennessee Football Fans Savour Kiffin's Legacy: The Toilet Bowl!
A dazed and confused student body from the University of Tennessee met at a late night wake on campus after the announcement that Football Ho Lane Kiffin had picked up and left town for the head coaching job at USC in the middle of the night, leavin...
Alex Lambert: Yes, Adam Is My Big Sister
The newest Lambert on American Idol, Alex Lambert may have a shot at reaching the top two heights of Adam Lambert, whom he calls "My Big Sister".
Alex then stated that he knew Adam would appreciate the humor of his remarks.
"Adam loves controv...
Adam Lambert Blows His Cover
Singer Adam Lambert has admitted up front that he is gay but now a story is going around TV land that he has gotten a young lady follower pregnant.
The story is said to have originated with an Ellen DeGeneres close friend in the gay world but no o...
Mariah Carey Still Explaining Acceptance Speech
Using the relatively negative press coverage over her recent attempt at an acceptance speech for winning this year's "Breakthrough Actress Award", Carey and her publicists are spinning her poor showing on stage with follow up explanations and photo o...
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