Showing the very latest breaking spoof news snippets. You can use the calendar on the right to browse through the most recent breaking news snippets.

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Trump Names Sarah Palin as Chief of Staff of...

...the Upstairs Maid Crew for the White House!

written by Al N., 01 December 2016
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Government Deny That Photographed 'Have Cake And Eat It' Note Referred To Brexit Strategy

'Mark Field's aide, Julia Dockerill, was simply pondering on her elevenses,' said a Downing Street spokesman. 'The notes later refer to her plans to stuff her face with crisps and chocolate.'

written by Swan Morrison, 29 November 2016
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Dead ducks in Holland are not Double Dutch!

Yet again Holland leads the way in global conservationism by culling 190000 dead ducks, shipping them to Hong Hong not for eating, no, it's a brand new aphrodiziac called "Save the tiger's teeth!"

written by Jaggedone, 27 November 2016
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Fidel Castro's Death Leads to 9 Days of Mourning

Trump's election is 22 days of mourning and counting.

written by Mike Peril, 27 November 2016
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Irish Priest Barred by Vatican

Controversial Irish Catholic theologian, Fr. Finnbar O'Murphy has been excommunicated by Pope Francis for declaring that "Jesus Christ did not want to suffer... for humanity or anything else."

written by Auntie Matter, 27 November 2016
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Distress Call from Mars

The world's biggest radio telescope situated at Guizhou in South West China after only a few days operating has picked up a May Day signal from Mars claiming that aliens have invaded their planet.

written by Auntie Matter, 27 November 2016
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Fidel Castro Gone

Fidel Castro is dead aged 90.
Cuban octogenarians say he may have been poisoned.

written by Auntie Matter, 26 November 2016
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After the Mannequin Challenge

After the Mannequin Challenge set up by the NWO boys to convince the young that they are but things... comes its successor - the "Be a Douche Bag Challenge" now sweeping the nation.

written by Auntie Matter, 25 November 2016
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Rowling's Secret Billions

Sick of the "I did it my way" rags to riches Rowling myth? Well you should. The Freemasons made Rowling and protect their golden cow to a man. Who believes Potter has anything to do with literature?

written by Auntie Matter, 25 November 2016
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Mike Pence Doesn't Want to Be Called Vice-President Because He is Against Vice

He thinks "The Deputy President," or even "President, Jr." would be acceptable though.

written by Al N., 25 November 2016
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Mike Pence Doesn't Want to Be Called Vice-President Because He is Against Vice

The Deputy President, or even President, Jr. or would be okay though.

written by Al N., 25 November 2016
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Vimeo's Erotica

It has now been disclosed that ALL of the erotic videos on Vimeo are made by the same dude - retired gynecologist and tattoo artist Dr. Ramana Dick Bumsfelt of Hackney London.

written by Auntie Matter, 24 November 2016
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New Category in This Years Oscars

The new category is "The Dumbest Lyrics in a Musical".
Fav is The Bodyguard where... Whitney Houston sings to Kevin Costner..."We both know I'm not what you... you neeeed..." What he needed was specs.

written by Auntie Matter, 24 November 2016
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George W. Bush and Barack Obama Are Secretly Glad Trump Was Elected

They know that when Trump's term is over, no one will ever call THEM "Worst President Ever" again.

written by Al N., 24 November 2016
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Thanksgiving Pardon

Today President Obama pardoned all the turkeys who voted for Donald Trump.

They will live out their lives standing in unemployment lines, waiting for Mr. Trump to Make America Great Again.

written by Matt Birkenhauer, 24 November 2016
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Trump Says He Forgot His Secret Plan to Defeat ISIS

"It's so secret I was afraid to write it down. But it'll come to me, I'm sure" said Trump.

written by Al N., 24 November 2016
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Melania Trump Says She Will Live in Switzerland

"I know Donald real well and Switzerland might be the safest place to be" admitted Melania.

written by Al N., 23 November 2016
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Thanksgiving Reminder to Self

Reminder to self: If the topic of the election comes up at Thanksgiving, do NOT refer to the President-erect as the Birther-in-Chief or as President Xenophobe.

written by Matt Birkenhauer, 23 November 2016
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Ve only tell ze truth!

A document found by Jaggedone's Cockroach Infiltration Army written by Frau Goebbels in Berlin, 1945, proves that Adolf planted the seed that made Trump trump! Ask Josef Mengele & Dustin Hoffman!

written by Jaggedone, 22 November 2016
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Illuminati Declaration

"With the might and power of our science we will so condition the human mind that when we tell the truth however ghastly nobody will respond; and when we tell lies, nobody will be able to respond."

written by Auntie Matter, 22 November 2016
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Rooney orders gold-plated zimmerframe!

Jose Mourinho has told Wayne Rooney he is too slow and advised him to order a gold-plated zimmerframe from Amazon.Com! Most United fans would rather see Wayne sent up the Amazon!

written by Jaggedone, 21 November 2016
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Fatty tax on global airlines imminent!

After Samoa Airline led the way it seems that all global airlines will implement a "fatty tax" on board their planes. Ryanair support the action too! No fatty people, just fatty profits please!

written by Jaggedone, 20 November 2016
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Trump tweets about his excrement

Donald Trump has tweeted, "I just took a huge crap. It was so big, I'm telling you, there are no problems down there. I am so good at going to the toilet, the best. No-one is better at it than me."

written by Sir Geoffroy Cockface, 19 November 2016
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Coral reefs rebound

For years choral reefs have been dying and becoming bleached out rocks due to rising sea temperatures. Luckily U.S government policy that global warming is a hoax has given these reefs a second chance

written by wasabiphil, 19 November 2016
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Mars and moon to switch places

Due to strong demand for more moonlight for lovers, NASA is planning to place Mars in orbit around the earth. The moon will take the old Mars orbit, but will not be red, similar to this snippet.

written by wasabiphil, 19 November 2016
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Donald Trump never loses at bridge

In addition to being such a fantastic president-elect, Donald Trump never loses a game of bridge for obvious reasons.

written by wasabiphil, 19 November 2016
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First Amendment Rewrite

Republicans have rewritten the Establishment Clause, "Congress shall make no law respecting the practice of Islam but shall make one prohibiting the free exercise thereof."

written by Matt Birkenhauer, 19 November 2016
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Worst Places to Take a Selfie

1. Divorce Court.
2. Hijacked Plane.
3. Funeral Mass.
4. Death Row.

written by Auntie Matter, 17 November 2016
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Trump Will Tear Down White House and Build a Variation on Trump Tower

It will look kind of like a castle and be re-named the White Castle.

written by Al N., 16 November 2016
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Donald Trump, Jr., Admits His Dad Did It All to Impress Billy Bush

Hopefully, Billy isn't impressed by nuclear explosions.

written by Al N., 16 November 2016
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Trump Will Not Deport All Aliens-Some He Will Just Build A Wall Around

...And make them pay for it!

written by Al N., 16 November 2016
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End of The World

HEADLINE:
"America has declared war against Russia and China!"
You will never miss breaking news with GOOGLE News Alerts

written by Auntie Matter, 15 November 2016
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Donald Trump's Newest Book

Donald Trump has released his newest book, called "They Pussy Grabber-in-Chief Tells All: How to Seduce Women and Voters with Tic Tacs and Bombast."

On sale at adult book stores everywhere.

written by Matt Birkenhauer, 15 November 2016
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Trump has choice words after meeting with Hillary Clinton...

"....That bitch just groped me!"

written by Jill The Shill, 15 November 2016
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Trump vows to build a wall around Mississippi, Alabama and Oklahoma...

"....the keep the poor white trash that voted for him from stopping by the White House."

written by Jill The Shill, 15 November 2016
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Nostradamus Prediction About Trump Unclear

Interpreters can't tell if he was saying Trump will destroy the desert or ruin the dessert or both.

written by Al N., 14 November 2016
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Confusion

Who the hell is J.K Rowling? Who's saying what, when, where and how..about what? And who really has written what about what? Why all the secrecy? Where is her ex-husband, her editors? Who dey? WTF!?

written by Auntie Matter, 13 November 2016
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Plagiarism Lawyers

Skillings, Rowling's lawyers who took 60+ people to court on her behalf, state. "Writers pleading plagiarism against our clients, go home. Thanks to the web, we can find antecedents to anything. OK?"

written by Auntie Matter, 13 November 2016
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Taylor Swift, Mad That Her Candidate Lost and Writing A Song About How She Will Never, Ever Vote Again

She will further consider voting a reason for breaking up with someone (and writing a song).

written by Al N., 12 November 2016
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Belfast Names Twin City

Belfast, Northern Ireland has named Palermo Sicily as its twin city. "We have so much in common," explained Sinn Fein councillor, Finnbar Corleone.

written by Auntie Matter, 12 November 2016
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America celebrates its first disabled president

Disability groups over the whole world have praised the US for being so progressive as to vote in its first disabled president. Donald Trump suffers from tiny hands and multiple mental problems.

written by Sir Geoffroy Cockface, 11 November 2016
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Trump Campaign Crew Revealed to Be Behind Killer Klown Konspiracy

"We knew we had to get America scared enough before they would ever vote for Trump!"

written by Al N., 11 November 2016
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Grunting, sniffing Sharapova becomes UN ambassador!

Banned ex-tennis star is the new UN ambassador for global drug-runners! Maria will assist runners to get faster and fitter and her experience as a major grunting sniffer will be invaluable!

written by Jaggedone, 10 November 2016
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Trump's Son Looks Strange

Donald's son looks strange as his dad accepts the nomination on camera. As well he might, because he knows the Chosen One was Clinton and something has gone badly wrong.

written by Auntie Matter, 10 November 2016
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Trump Still Can't Get Gates and Buffet to Talk To Him

Trump was once again was not allowed to attend the meeting of the Billionaire's Club.

written by Al N., 10 November 2016
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Trump Announces He Will Have White House Painted Red

"Just like that beautiful Red map you saw when I won!" trumpeted Trump.

written by Al N., 10 November 2016
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Trump Claims He Made the Market Go Down to Punish Hillary Supporters

Trump knows his followers think the market is where you buy groceries and beer.

written by Al N., 10 November 2016
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Trump Claims the Election is Rigged and Then Is Informed He Won

"Never mind" said Trump.

written by Al N., 09 November 2016
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11/9 Is The New 9/11

Everyone will one day talk about remembering just where they were when they heard about 11/9.

written by Al N., 09 November 2016
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Hurricane destroys US!

Hurricane Donald would have been too obvious! So let's call it Hillary instead and keep to tradition! Women destroy everything!

written by Jaggedone, 09 November 2016
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