Latest spoof news snippets
Showing the very latest breaking spoof news snippets. You can use the calendar on the right to browse through the most recent breaking news snippets.
Pink Loses Suit Against Manufacturer of "Lick Pink" Gear
"You can't complain about a parody that associates your brand with a sexual act if your brand is already named 'Like Pink,'" said the judge in the case.
No fun being a burger bun on the buses!
UK buses are banning burgers and their owners from boarding! Obese munching burger people take up too many seats and skinnies are being squeezed on to bikes! Terrible for the economy!
Roger Ailes Arrives in Hell
"You're here for starting a polarizing fake news station AND the sexual harassment" spoke Satan.
Anthony's Weiner Gets Him in Trouble Again
Hopefully, 2 to 3 years imprisoned with other sex offenders will make him think about it next time.
World Trembles as Trump Travels
"Meeting with Muslim, Jewish, and Catholic leaders-it's a recipe for disaster!" said everybody.
Harry Potter Republicans Gather Together to Save Trump from Witch Hunt
We are the best witch hunt protection Trump can get!
Trump is Reportedly Holed Up in a Bunker in a Hidden Location
Forsaking his tour, as most of the countries have cancelled him, Trump says he is under attack.
Brazilian President, the Estate of Chris Cornell & Bill Cosby All to Sue Trump
"So, nobody can find out anything if it isn't about Trump. He has narcistically hijacked the news."
Donald Trump's Presidential Museum Set To Be Located At Amusement Park
Coney Island, the iconic amusement park in Brooklyn N.Y, will house a kiosk with a collection of scraps of paper, napkins, crayons and other articles used by Mr. Trump to formulate his decisions.
Thousands Of NHS Patient Files Lost
When asked if this had rested from a new cyber attack, an NHS spokesman reassured reporters that such misplacement of notes was an entirely normal, every day occurrence.
Snowflake: A term used to describe anyone complaining about President Trump, used primarily by those who spent the previous eight years whining about President Obama.
The Yankees retired Derek Jeter's number this weekend. The Mets only had Sandy Alderson's IQ score to work with.
Trump Goes on Firing Spree and Fires New President of France
Also, Steve Colbert, Bill Maher, Meryl Streep, Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, & the CEO of Nordstrom.
Americans Can't Tell the Difference Between a Trump Speech and an SNL Skit
But luckily Apple is working on an app for that.
James Comey will now leverage his prosecutorial acumen on TV
Ex-FBI Director Comey will appear on NoCrimeTV. A preview of his 1st show indicates he will explain how Hitler, Pol Pot, Stalin, and the 911 Hijackers were not guilty of crimes due to lack of intent.
Trump Names Bill O'Reilly to Department of Sexual Harassment
Other members and experts in the department include Roger Ailes, Bill Cosby, Sean Hannity, & Trump.
Trump Claims That He Invented the Phrase "Prime the Pump"
Another phrase Trump invented is'stupid is as stupid does.' He also invented the word 'moron.'
Trump Says Firing FBI Director Had Nothing to Do With FBI's Investigation of Trump
"President Trump has found someone that will be hugely good as FBI Director" said Trump flunkies.
Until further notice, the role of FBI director will be played by Alec Baldwin.
Beware of flying, fire-spouting Dino!
Chinese scientists have discovered Theresa May's DNA is the same as a fire-spouting, flying, dino-dragon that once ruled the planet! Well that explains everything!
Human Ken Trashes Human Barbie
"She's all fake implants and extensions," said Human Ken as he received steroid and Botox injections.
Christopher Hitchens Drinks Satan Under the Table, Attempts Daring Escape from Hell.
Deceased author and columnist Christopher Hitchens attempts a daring escape from hell but is tackled by Satan's right hand man Johnny Cochran.
Protest Volunteers Growing Weary Over Never Ending Schedule, Demand at Least Weed Money From George Soros
Volunteers for George Soros' anti-conservative Protest Alliance group are starting to get a little dismayed at the lack of support they're getting from the top.
Slogan Rethink As General Election Campaign Begins In Earnest
Political parties have been forced to urgently revise their election strategies on discovery that all but one party leader had chosen the same vote-winning slogan: 'I'm Not Jeremy Corbyn'.
France bans skinny models!
Rich and famous people attending Parisian fashion shows can now remove their earplugs! Because the sound of strutting, Rolling Bones rattling catwalks has been banned!
Kim Jong-Un Eats Through Surplus North Korean Food
A new famine has begun and Kim's still hungry!
President Trump Has an Enlarged Heart
The president accidentally told the truth when he said he has a big heart for Dreamers: it seems Trump is suffering from cardiomegaly, an enlarged heart brought on by his poor health.
Jeremy Corbyn To Vote Conservative On 8th June
'I've been a lifelong Labour supporter,' he told reporters. 'I'd like to see a Labour government, but, with the political situation as it is just at the moment, I think I need to play safe this time.'
Chuckle Brothers Decide Not To Sue Jeremy Corbyn And Tim Farron
'They're not deliberately copying our material,' said Chuckle Brothers, Barry and Paul Elliott, magnanimously. 'It's not their fault that the public keep mistaking them for us.'
Jeremy Corbyn Promises Paradise On Earth If Elected
'There will be no more wars,' he told the last remaining Labour voters. 'Peace, joy and love will prevail for all eternity. Dianne Abbott intended to announce this today,' he added, 'but she forgot.'
Congressman Chaffetz Has Foot Removed From Mouth
Still in a cast after the historic surgery, the head of the house oversight committee hopes to get back to the investigation of Hillary Clinton's role in the Russian hacking of the 2016 election.
What a drag.
Uber to fly the unfriendly skies
Within three years, Uber intends to offer flying cars to serve as taxis or, for passengers who no longer want to be dragged down an airplane's aisles, as surrogates for United Airlines flights.
Rapper Kodak Black may be imprisoned for real
For violating house arrest and visiting a strip club, rapper Kodak Black could face hard time in prison. "If I goes to jail, it be worth it," he said. "Them titties was sexy!"
Bill Cosby eager to clear his name
As he awaits trial on rape charges, has-been comedian Bill Cosby says he can't wait until he's acquitted so he can, uh, "perform" again.
Website harasses Coulter
A website, Jess's Belles, sexually harassed conservative pundit Anne Coulter, calling her a "blowhard," a euphemism for someone who performs oral sex.
Jaggedone just reached 1500 spoofs and he's still alive!
Lawsuits, terrorist threats on his life, Mark Lawton's editorial clap-trap cannot keep an old spoofer down! Jaggedone reached a milestone; 1500 spoofs and still bullshitting! Now where's my cheque?
I got the results back from my Telomere kit to find out how old I was in Teloyears, and discovered that I've been dead since 2007. Bummer.
The First Two Hundred Days
BREAKING NEWS: After No Major Legislative Wins, President Trump Signs an Executive Order Extending the First One Hundred Days to Two Hundred Days
Transylvania Airlines Announces Policy Change
"From now on, when flights are overbooked, we will no longer impale surplus passengers beside the airport tarmac," announced company president Vlad Teppish.
Bill O'Reilly and Roger Ailes to Form New Network
All women must sign non-disclosure agreements before working for them.
Wonder drug comes too late for Jaggedone!
Scientists have developed a drug that stops neurodegenerative brain diseases, including dementia! Who the fuck is Jaggedone???
Jeremy Corbyn Welcomes Election
'He's had to say that he welcomes an election,' said someone living in the real world. 'I wonder if Theresa will force turkeys into saying they welcome Christmas.'
Giant iceberg causes meltdown among global drink companies!
A giant iceberg struck the coast of Canada causing a meltdown between global drink giants. Red Bull, Coca Cola, etc, tried but to buy it, but a Scotch whisky giant called it Titanic and won the race!
White House Cleaning Staff Accidentally Flushes Trump Administration
"Sometimes it's hard to tell the trash that people want to keep."
"Someone should have left us a note," said unnamed staff member.
Trump Offers to Fight Kim Jong-Un to Settle Conflict
"My proxy is ready to go-Vladimir Putin! So, Kimmy Boy, you aren't chicken are you?" tweeted Trump.
Celebs should never say never!
John Cleese is the latest celeb to eat his words after crawling back to the BeeB. He will play a gay Basil Fawlty who falls in love with Manuel and divorces Sybil; promises to be a bender!
Tesco Apologise For Booze Ad: 'Great Offers On Beer And Cider. Good Friday Just Got Better'
'We're now working on our Christmas campaign,' said a Tesco spokesman. 'What do you think of: It's Boozemas. Come to Tesco for mangers full of cheap hooch?'
United Airlines Now Offers Both a Red-Eye Flight and a Black-Eye Flight
The friendly skies just ain't what they used to be!
Donald and Melania Trump Forgot About Barron and He Was "Home Alone" During Christmas Vacation
The worst part was there was only around $102,000 in petty cash in the penthouse!