Commerce Department Approves Big Pharma Merger

Funny story: Commerce Department Approves Big Pharma Merger
Officials at the US Department of Commerce endorsed the largest merger in corporate history by rubber-stamping the paperwork prior to returning it to the roll in the toilet stall at the lavatory down the hall. The amalgamation involved the acquis...
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Apple Reveals New iBitch Robot

Funny story: Apple Reveals New iBitch Robot
Electronics giant Apple chose New York City as a venue to introduce its new dominatrix robot, the iBitch, to consumers last week. Spokesbitch Ivana C. U. Hirt explained to reporters and tech gurus that the idea for the iBitch was actually spawned...
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Quackberry Launches New Smartphone App

Funny story: Quackberry Launches New Smartphone App
As predicted, the release of Apple's new iBitch robot has prompted arch-rival Quackberry to respond with a competing product. However, Quackberry has chosen to tap the same market niche via a completely different approach. At a press conference y...
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Fed Intentionally Trying to Maintain the American Dollar's Low Value Worldwide

Funny story: Fed Intentionally Trying to Maintain the American Dollar's Low Value Worldwide
While the American Economy struggles to regain its footing following the massive recession and credit crisis, the Fed seems to have their own agenda. Economists on Capitol hill have been expressing growing concerns over the budding economy. One f...
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Dunkin Donuts Says Minimum Wage Hike Will Lead To Mechanization of Donut Hole Making

Funny story: Dunkin Donuts Says Minimum Wage Hike Will Lead To Mechanization of Donut Hole Making
St. Louis, MO - For years, Wilbur Jones of St. Louis has been working the graveyard shift at Dunkin Donuts, making donut holes with his dick. "They hired me because the circumference of my wang when erect was the size of a donut hole," Jones said,...
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Banks Reply to Greece

Funny story: Banks Reply to Greece
Yes folks, it's ALL FOR YOU, isn't it? "Why can't we all just... get along?" "The International Monetary Fund (IMF) is an international organization headquartered in Washington, D. C., of 188 countries working to foster global monetary coopera...
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Disney sues NASA: "Pluto is ours."

Funny story: Disney sues NASA: "Pluto is ours."
Reports today have emerged that conglomerate Disney is suing NASA over the naming rights of Pluto. The entertainment giants claim that the recent media interest given to the dwarf planet is detracting from their brand and causing them to lose tens of...
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Rapper .50 cent Lowers His Price For Walmart Ad

Funny story: Rapper .50 cent Lowers His Price For Walmart Ad
Los Angeles, CA - Rapper .50 cent has apparently completed terms on a contract with retail giant Walmart, in an agreement to cross-market one and others brands. The Walmart folks want America to know that there is nothing that they can't cut the pric...
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Breaking News...

Pirates' Cruise Ship Snack Attack

A motley crew of swashbuckling pirates commandeered a luxury cruise ship off the coast of Somalia and demanded 10 million dollars until the buccaneers dined in the cafeteria and died of food poisoning
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Funny story: Apple watches to give you the time of your life

Apple watches to give you the time of your life

Apple wants your money, as much (or as little) of it as it can get--as much being $10,000 (for Big Spenders), as little $349 (for cheapskates). That's right, the company founded by Johnny Appleseed has added wristwatches to its collection...
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Funny story: Prices of guitars skyrocketing - Buy one now before they cost more than you do!

Prices of guitars skyrocketing - Buy one now before they cost more than you do!

Hipsters, douche-bags, failed musicians, and people without many friends alike need to buy their guitars and fast. As summer rolls around, the beaches of the coasts are going to be flooded with morons, failing college students, hot babes and guys...
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Funny story: Snoop Dogg backs dope drone app

Snoop Dogg backs dope drone app

Los Angeles, California - Rolling Stoned magazine is reporting today that well known US rapper Snoop Dogg is a leading backer of an innovative $100m start-up business delivering medical marijuana by aerial drone. Mr Dogg, real name Calvin Cordoza...
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Funny story: Finance Ministers lacking Financial Acumen are victims of crafty Advisors

Finance Ministers lacking Financial Acumen are victims of crafty Advisors

An inquiry into the Banking Collapse in Ireland has called a former Finance Minister to account. Brain Mccowswaine's answer to awkward Press Questions , tended to the claim that, he and others, were acting on the information available at the time...
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Funny story: Mcdoogles is moving their corporate office to Indiana

Mcdoogles is moving their corporate office to Indiana

Mcdoogles is moving their corporate office to Indiana to take advantage of the religious freedom law. Out of the burger business and into … religion? Corporate executives at Mcdoogles are filing tax exempt status for their state and federal ear...
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Funny story: Teddy Bears Protest Planned Closing of FAO Schwarz

Teddy Bears Protest Planned Closing of FAO Schwarz

Even for New Yorkers who think they've seen it all, this was a unique sighting! Yesterday on Fifth Avenue in NYC, a large group of teddy bears protested the planned July closing of the world-famous toy store FAO Schwarz. The bears staged the prote...
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Funny story: McDonalds to Hire 500 Chimpanzees In 250 Test Stores

McDonalds to Hire 500 Chimpanzees In 250 Test Stores

A major announcement from McDonald's -who like all companies forced to compete in the global marketplace - is committed to using good old American creativity and resourcefulness to beat China and India at their own game. "McDonald's will be employ...
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Funny story: McDee's To Test New "Make-It-Yo-Damn-Self" Locations in L.A.

McDee's To Test New "Make-It-Yo-Damn-Self" Locations in L.A.

Los Angeles, CA - In an effort to keep up with the times and not slide down the grease sewer of bankruptcy, McDonald's is rolling out implementation of their latest marketing gimmick. "We've poured hundreds of millions of dollars into this project...
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The Big C O Jones
The Big C O Jones
Joined: 17 October 2008
Stories Written: 24

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