Funny story: 'We kicked Donziger's ass good and proper' Chevron tells shareholders meeting

'We kicked Donziger's ass good and proper' Chevron tells shareholders meeting

Midland, Texas - The world famous Rogues Gallery at Midland's Permain Basin Petroleum Museum got a horrible new addition this week as racketeering New York lawyer Steven Donziger was finally inducted into its corruption rankings. Acclaimed by the...
View ''We kicked Donziger's ass good and proper' Chevron tells shareholders meeting'

Wireless Carriers Want to Add "Mauled By Rabid Raccoon" to Terms of Breaking Contract

Washington D.C. - A conglomeration of the country's six largest wireless carriers are lobbying the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) to allow them to add "Mauled by rabid raccoon" to the consequences to a consumer of breaking the contract they...
View 'Wireless Carriers Want to Add "Mauled By Rabid Raccoon" to Terms of Breaking Contract'

Upstate Pizza: "We're not related to Upstate Urology"

Upstate Pizza and Subs of Troy, NY clarified yesterday that they weren't related to Upstate Urology, another establishment, located in another part of town, and using the same name as the sub and pizza shop. David Grushim, proprietor of the eat...
View 'Upstate Pizza: "We're not related to Upstate Urology"'
Funny story: Twitter Birdies Go On Shopping Spree

Twitter Birdies Go On Shopping Spree

"Shop till you drop" doesn't apply only to humans. Twitter birdies, bored with their usual endeavors, have taken to shopping. Boy, have they taken to shopping! During the last few weeks, the best stores on Fifth Avenue in NYC have been packe...
View 'Twitter Birdies Go On Shopping Spree'
Funny story: Friday the 13th Full Moon roller coaster countdown for beleaguered NewsCorpse chief

Friday the 13th Full Moon roller coaster countdown for beleaguered NewsCorpse chief

New York - The last time a full moon occurred on Friday the 13th, in October 2000, Rupert Murdoch was sitting pretty in his NYC NewsCorpse HQ confidently predicting Al 'Weird Al' Gore was just daze away from being elected the next President of the U...
View 'Friday the 13th Full Moon roller coaster countdown for beleaguered NewsCorpse chief'

Women Get Advice On Fox On How To Succeed

A Fox & Friends segment on Monday warned women looking to succeed in business "not to raise their voices" and not to talk too much. Fox News host Steve Doocy introduced Sylvia Ann Hewlett, author of "Executive Presence." She suggested that w...
View 'Women Get Advice On Fox On How To Succeed'

Falklands In Argentinian Government Bonds Rescue

The British Falkland Islands are now the new owners of all Argentina's Government bonds, infrastructure shares, mining and commodity stock after an anticipated IMF approved rescue plan was implemented at 6.00 hrs this morning. The move is expected t...
View 'Falklands In Argentinian Government Bonds Rescue'
Funny story: Sporting Goods Chain Refuses to Pay for Employees' Boner Pills

Sporting Goods Chain Refuses to Pay for Employees' Boner Pills

Self Righteous Sporting Goods Corporation recently announced that their employee health plan will no longer cover medication for erectile dis-function (ED) unless the employee is married, Christian, and seeking to procreate. The closely-held retail c...
View 'Sporting Goods Chain Refuses to Pay for Employees' Boner Pills'
Breaking News...

"I Made Up Global Warming" Admits Gore

"I needed a new campaign hook and that bit about me inventing the Internet just wasn't going to fly so I just thought up that one," said Al Gore, Nobel Prize winner and former Vice-President.


 
Funny story: Hellfire Bank loses Argentina license

Hellfire Bank loses Argentina license

New York - Five billion dollars of the Pope's private funds are about to go up in smoke after his Manhattan-based hedge fund, the Hellfire Bank, lost its Argentinian banking licence. Along with His Holiness's five billion bucks. Hellfire has b...
View 'Hellfire Bank loses Argentina license'
Funny story: Inflation Has Pushed Price of "Your Thoughts" to 9.5 Cents: Most Thoughts Not Worth The Investment

Inflation Has Pushed Price of "Your Thoughts" to 9.5 Cents: Most Thoughts Not Worth The Investment

Wall Street - Economic inflation has pushed the price of "your thoughts" to nine and a half cents ($0.095) and most investment experts agree that it is usually an extremely bad investment yielding not only no actual positive return, but it has the po...
View 'Inflation Has Pushed Price of "Your Thoughts" to 9.5 Cents: Most Thoughts Not Worth The Investment'
Funny story: Shades of 'Ecuador judicial model' as $100m bung to German court ends F1 boss' bribery trial

Shades of 'Ecuador judicial model' as $100m bung to German court ends F1 boss' bribery trial

Munich - Not since bent NYC lawyer Steven Donziger perpetrated the mass bribery of Ecuador's justice department, judges, court officials, etc, in the notorious $19bn Chevron scam has another sovereign state's judicial system been exposed as blatantly...
View 'Shades of 'Ecuador judicial model' as $100m bung to German court ends F1 boss' bribery trial'
Funny story: Bear Lying in a Hammock Offered a Job

Bear Lying in a Hammock Offered a Job

He was relaxing and minding his own business when the photo went viral. The bear has told friends he fails to see why it's such an oddity. "What's so interesting about seeing someone relax in a hammock?" he asks. A major hammock maker thought i...
View 'Bear Lying in a Hammock Offered a Job'
Funny story: Thefts reveal retail giant's plans to sell "adults-only items"

Thefts reveal retail giant's plans to sell "adults-only items"

BUG TUSSLE, AK -- Despite its treatment of its employees, many of whom receive minimum wages and no health or other benefits, Mallwart has the reputation, whether deserved or not, of being a "family-friendly" retailer. However, in the wake of rece...
View 'Thefts reveal retail giant's plans to sell "adults-only items"'
Funny story: GM finds the cause of its ignition switch debacle

GM finds the cause of its ignition switch debacle

Detroit - Rabbits' feet have proven to be unlucky for what used to be the world's largest car maker. The key chain charms have been fingered by General Motors engineers as the cause for sudden ignition shutdown that could affect millions of vehicles.
View 'GM finds the cause of its ignition switch debacle'
Funny story: GM Recalls Every Car They Ever Made

GM Recalls Every Car They Ever Made

Millions of GM car owners got a big surprise in their mailbox this week, a recall notice informing them that their, Caprice, Colbart, Corvair, Vega, Chevette, Corvette, Trailblazer, Suburban, Yukon, Malibu or any other GM car ever made is a death tra...
View 'GM Recalls Every Car They Ever Made'
Funny story: NASA predicts Richard Branson's space travel pipe dream will bomb

NASA predicts Richard Branson's space travel pipe dream will bomb

Washington DC - Wannabe astronut Richard Branson is a complete charlatan whose daft Virgin Intergalactic Corp should be renamed Vergin' on the Ridiculous according to a NASA memo published this week. The world's premier space agency reckons decade...
View 'NASA predicts Richard Branson's space travel pipe dream will bomb'

Interested in writing your own spoof news stories like these?

Yes, tell me more!

Profile Featured Writer

bartlebysnopes
bartlebysnopes
Joined: 23 January 2008
Stories Written: 36

Seven day catch up

Check out anything you've missed with the archive:

Go to top