Phwoar and Peace!

Funny story: Phwoar and Peace!
With the news that it has been 'sexed up' the new BBC 're-telling' of Tolstoy's achingly stunning saga, War and Peace, promises to be a masturbators dream. Any attempt to do justice to the late great authors work has been jettisoned to appeal to a...
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Betting for Britain: Osborne goes to the dogs...and horses

Funny story: Betting for Britain: Osborne goes to the dogs...and horses
As stock markets become more volatile and interest rates remain pitifully low, George Osborne, Chancellor of the Exchequer, is looking for lucrative alternatives to invest the nation's surplus income, and has discovered a genuine money-spinner. Osbor...
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Revised UK Department Of Health Guidance On Alcohol Consumption Meets With Widespread Anger And Criticism

Funny story: Revised UK Department Of Health Guidance On Alcohol Consumption Meets With Widespread Anger And Criticism
Revised UK Department of Health guidance on alcohol consumption has met with widespread anger and criticism. 'Government cuts have now gone too far,' said John Smith, a typical British drinker. 'First they reduce spending on essential public servi...
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Sex Ordinary School in Trouble

Funny story: Sex Ordinary School in Trouble
A pupil at Granchester Comprehensive has caused trouble for the school with a spelling mistake. He sent an tweet to a friend that he was going to a 'sex ordinary school' when he meant secondary school. This slip resulted in the media descending...
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"Walk this way..." School curriculum to include lessons in carriage and deportment

Funny story: "Walk this way..." School curriculum to include lessons in carriage and deportment
Carriage and Deportment is to be introduced as a compulsory subject in a pilot project in British schools as of the new school year, with the aim of preparing British youth in, well, how to walk and stand around. Little known to the public, world...
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Petticoats and Davy Lamps

Funny story: Petticoats and Davy Lamps
Following the discriminatory wristband scandal in Cardiff, where refugees were required to wear coloured bands to ensure they could be identified by staff serving meals, the government has apologized unreservedly and has introduced measures which, th...
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Donald Duck for President

Funny story: Donald Duck for President
Presidential hopeful Donald Duck - known to his friends as Goofy - has been taking the mickey out of front runner Minnie Cliton. Teasingly Donald refers to his rival as Clit and claims Minnie has never understood America's favourite poet from the...
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Ratatouille two-step

Funny story: Ratatouille two-step
A man who had previously complained that a rat had 'run up his leg' while he was eating in his local Wetherspoon's pub has been exposed as a fraud. Dick Soars, 57, was on a blind Internet date with, Mona Lotz, a nubile Lithuanian wench and had arr...
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Breaking News...

Trump has no need of prayer . . .

. . . says he can talk to himself anytime he wants to.
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Funny story: An Englishman named George Bush is jailed for selling dead monkey heads and having beastiality images

An Englishman named George Bush is jailed for selling dead monkey heads and having beastiality images

LONDON, England - Some psycho named George Bush (no, he's from the Erith section of London, England, and he is not, and I will repeat, he is not from the powerful, influential, Republican, Texas family of U.S. Presidents), has been jailed for 14 mon...
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Funny story: Two robbers chased down by lionhearted Englanders on a combine harvester

Two robbers chased down by lionhearted Englanders on a combine harvester

SOMEWHERE NEAR A CROP CIRCLE IN ENGLAND - When a fleet of fast police patrol cars isn't available, there's always a very odd chance that the trusty combine harvester might be around to go after rogue criminals. A trio of Englishmen stopped gun-wie...
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Funny story: Old Salford Sense of Humour

Old Salford Sense of Humour

There have been fewer migrant incursions into the Channel Tunnel as word spreads through the Calais camp about what life in Britain is really like. I come to Britain because I thought it was fair, decent and beautiful country," said one man who id...
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Funny story: Met office storms to be renamed

Met office storms to be renamed

The Met office today announced a change to the naming convention it has used for the last fifteen years. The change follows the increase in over the top reporting that follows when it gets a little bit windy outside, Normally, the storms a...
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Funny story: Chip butty 'central' to continued EU membership, says Cameron

Chip butty 'central' to continued EU membership, says Cameron

Fundamental, far-reaching changes to redefine Britain's membership in the European Union were outlined by the Prime Minister, David Cameron, yesterday in a hand-written letter to the EU. MEPs in Brussels were taken aback by some of them, which inc...
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Funny story: Disabled man sues mountain for discrimination

Disabled man sues mountain for discrimination

A disabled man who was unable to climb the Ben Nevis mountain in Scotland was unlawfully discriminated against and deserved an apology, a tribunal has ruled. John Dixon, 43, from Stowmarket, Suffolk was keen to climb the UK's tallest mountain, unt...
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Funny story: Corbyn's Plans To Turn Downing Street into Refugee Camp

Corbyn's Plans To Turn Downing Street into Refugee Camp

Jeremy Corbyn has today vowed that he would turn Downing Street into a refugee centre. Speaking from one of the spare bedrooms in his North London detached house, Corbyn said this: "We need to show compassion. We need to show the world we are pre...
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Funny story: Put More Old People On the Moon

Put More Old People On the Moon

Following the roaring success of this year's Christmas John Lewis advert featuring a lonely old man living on the moon a government minister has come up with a unique solution to help all old, lonely, elderly, people. Norman Bygate, MP for Staff...
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IainB
IainB
Joined: 07 October 2008
Stories Written: 1,525

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