Funny story: A science experiment in Boston: Three stories of trash and half a $5 bill encased in ice remain as Old Man Winter heads south for a while

A science experiment in Boston: Three stories of trash and half a $5 bill encased in ice remain as Old Man Winter heads south for a while

BOSTON, Mass. - Remember that horrible Boston winter that had a blizzard effect all over the cable news networks? Well it's still around. It's not snowing on the East Coast now that Memorial Day has come and gone, but the remnants of last winter stan...
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Edgar Nernberg admits he is wrong about creationism

Edgar Nernberg tells an audience of Harvard University students that he's stupid and is no better than a dodo bird after being confronted with the truth by a Satanist about his latest fossil find. Eddie Charlton, leader of the Church of Satan conf...
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Trees watch the Happening, and decide to "at least make allergy season sucky this year."

After watching the perennially criticized M. Knight Shayamalan film "The Happening" trees have been attempting to replicate the effects on humans from the movie, but thus far have only gotten some people to sneeze and cough a lot. Mountain cedar...
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Funny story: Study finds that everything you do is "killing you"

Study finds that everything you do is "killing you"

A recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine has concluded that every activity you perform brings you one step closer to death. DR David Katz published an article that suggests that nobody has really discovered the perfect healt...
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Funny story: Research suggests parasite may be responsible for religious belief

Research suggests parasite may be responsible for religious belief

CALIFORNIA - In 2012, the Czech evolutionary biologist Jaroslav Flegr made headlines for his claim that the parasite Toxoplasma gondii was influencing the way we think and behave. Since the publication, researchers of the Stanley Medical Research...
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Apple to Introduce Slew of Wearable Technology Products Next Year

CUPERTINO, CA - Apple Inc. CEO, Tim Cook, announced today that they would introduce several new wearable technology products in Spring of 2016. Products will be available for both men and women. Men's products will include: iShoes, iSocks, iPants,...
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Climate Change Deniers Deny Denying the Existence of Climate Change

After a non stop barrage of natural disasters has made climate change deniers look like ninnies, several high profile culprits have started changing their tunes. Although, not everyone is ready to completely commit to the problem. Jim DeMint, Pre...
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Funny story: Philae Comet Lander transmits pics of International Space Station astronauts taking a slash

Philae Comet Lander transmits pics of International Space Station astronauts taking a slash

Space - A long range camera fixed to the Rosetta craft's Philae Lander has snapped Buzz Aldrin on board the ISS taking a surreptitious dump. NASA's famous spaceman and his pal Neil Armstrong were captured peeing out of the ISS saloon bar porthole...
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Breaking News...

Kerry Deals With Hostage Crisis

A spokesman for the U.S. State Department announced that Secretary of State John Kerry has been taken hostage by Iranian terrorists and is involved in negotiations demanding his immediate release.
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Funny story: Miami Hires SpaceX For 4th Of July Fireworks Display

Miami Hires SpaceX For 4th Of July Fireworks Display

Miami, FL - Miami Mayor, Roberto Pinkipants, needed to find a new fireworks display company for their upcoming 4th of July fireworks extravaganza - and they needed it fast! But, of course, the problem is, every company in the business is pretty busy...
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Funny story: Lady Gaga says I.Q. tests matter

Lady Gaga says I.Q. tests matter

Tanzanian - After the disappearance of several albino people, blonde bombshell Lady Gaga comes out to say that theories on human intelligence must be correct. "We need to find a solution to the problem and fast," says Lady Gaga. Armed gangs of...
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Funny story: Endangered species no longer endangered

Endangered species no longer endangered

It has been "leaked" from Dr. Phineas Provolone, Chair of the Ornithology Section of the Smithsonian, and will appear in tomorrow's "Bird and Cuckoo Digest," that an endangered bird specie is no longer endangered. The leaked information is in the...
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Funny story: 1,000 year-old 'Eye of Newt & Hair of Dog' remedy a superbug killer

1,000 year-old 'Eye of Newt & Hair of Dog' remedy a superbug killer

Switzerland - An Anglo-Saxon potion 'for curing ye poxe' has been found to kill 99% of the antibiotic-resistant flesh-eating Necrotizing fasciitis virus scientists said today. Discovered in a 9th century almanack of remedies called Baldy's Leechbo...
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Funny story: Veggies linked to poorer semen quality says glowing tampon manufacturer

Veggies linked to poorer semen quality says glowing tampon manufacturer

California - Vegetarians and other non-flesh eaters are most likely to be shooting blanks these days according to a sanitary protection specialist pimping glow-in-the-dark tampons. The manufacturers of RadiantPlugs periodwear said today that thou...
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Funny story: Energy Efficient Lighting Improves Sex Lives of Medical Examiners

Energy Efficient Lighting Improves Sex Lives of Medical Examiners

Since 1998 there has been a baby boom among medical examiners and coroners. This, according to experts, coincides with the increased use of CFL and LED lighting. Psychologist believe that the ghastly cyanotic hue of the skin under these lights allows...
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Funny story: Anonymous Hacks Autocorrect, Changes Every Fourth Word To Pizza

Anonymous Hacks Autocorrect, Changes Every Fourth Word To Pizza

The cyber watchdog group Anonymous just issued a statement claiming responsibility for the latest internet attack that has journalists, bloggers, texting addicts and people searching for cat videos all over the world shaking their fists in frustratio...
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Funny story: NASA discovers the "Gods of Creation"

NASA discovers the "Gods of Creation"

NASA experts, have concluded that this universe was created by advanced life forms that live outside of the universe. "We have found conclusive evidence of their existence," said Ellen Stofan, NASA chief scientist. While mission control was co...
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Jack Battler
Jack Battler
Joined: 01 March 2007
Stories Written: 36

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