Trump Proposes a Revival of NASA to Conquer Space and Claim It All For America!

Funny story: Trump Proposes a Revival of NASA to Conquer Space and Claim It All For America!
Washington, DC President Trump gave a press conference to announce that he had signed an executive order permitting him to control future space exploration, and to stake legal claims to anything found. "I don't think it's unfair to give the perso...
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My friend Jacko lands a job interviewing dead people who voted for Hillary Clinton

Funny story: My friend Jacko lands a job interviewing dead people who voted for Hillary Clinton
Upon much hesitancy and bewilderment, I joined my friend and neighbor Jacko, who visited a few local graveyards yesterday for a new job he just started. Jacko landed a job in the messy, stinking "Trump Dumpster" as an interviewer, investigator, a...
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Donald Trump Proves Existence of the Multiverse

Funny story: Donald Trump Proves Existence of the Multiverse
In a groundbreaking pronouncement, the International Forum of Theoretical Physicists today stated that Donald Trump's election confirmed the existence of the multiverse. At a press conference held at the National Academy of Sciences, Belinda Suarez,...
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Texas Instruments introduces the Wife's Calculator

Funny story: Texas Instruments introduces the Wife's Calculator
Jenn Swenson V.P. of business development for Texas Instruments Inc. has brought to market a product that many people feel existed already. The Wife's Calculator is 99% a regular calculator, it adds, subtract, multiplies, divides, works percentages,...
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Scientist Says "Sticky" Dark Matter Influenced Presidential Election

Funny story: Scientist Says "Sticky" Dark Matter Influenced Presidential Election
We can't see it or measure it directly, but scientists say they can detect the decay of dark matter around the universe and on earth, especially in Washington DC. It's a new type of dark matter though that has been discovered around Washington DC,...
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North Korean DIC-tator Kim Jong-Un Starting to Affect Gravity

Funny story: North Korean DIC-tator Kim Jong-Un Starting to Affect Gravity
Science Town, USA Scientists announced today that something in North Korea is beginning to affect Earth's gravity. "We are sure the object causing the irregularity is North Korea's dictator Kim Jong-Un. He has continued to expand as he gains weig...
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Earth to Become One Giant Candyland

Funny story: Earth to Become One Giant Candyland
If certain climatologists are to be believed the earth may one day become one giant Candy Land. The study based on actual climate models dispenses with the myth that oceans will rise and croplands become deserts, focusing instead on what happens to o...
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SMASH theory of physics fixes the Standard Model

Funny story: SMASH theory of physics fixes the Standard Model
Assachewsets Institute of Technocracy - Professor Hecktor Nogginbanger of AIT today announced a theory of everything that resolves all the unexplained problems in the Standard Model of physics. The new theory, some just call it fact, is called SMASH...
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Breaking News...

Randy Quaid's act unconvincing

Has-been actor Randy Quaid was arrested at the border when, according to Mounties, he tried to impersonate a Canuck in order to illegally enter Canada. (The U. S. doesn't want him, either.)
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Funny story: Astronomers discover planets that look like Earth! However, do we need another one?

Astronomers discover planets that look like Earth! However, do we need another one?

Thank the heavens (literally) that the seven planets discovered by astronomers are so far away, it would take roughly 770000 years to get there, because we really do not need another planet like ours! Jaggedone, sent his favourite scientific, unde...
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Funny story: Amazon is totally judging you

Amazon is totally judging you

Scientists have proven beyond all known doubt, that yes, Amazon is totally judging you, and all of the lifestyle choices you have ever made. Every book, CD,product from China, kindle book you have downloaded, clothes you have bought, and review yo...
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Funny story: Studies show Trump supporters are retarded

Studies show Trump supporters are retarded

Scientists from the University of Downton, England, have discovered that Americans who support Donald Trump have a significantly lower IQ than the average American. The news comes as little surprise to poor-basher Professor Tarquin Smythe-Wazzock, wh...
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Funny story: Scientists discover missing particle responsible for racism

Scientists discover missing particle responsible for racism

Work carried out by scientists at CERN and published in this month's Nature Journal detail the surprise results of the experiment. Prof Brian Cox (not the leading scientist on the experiment but the only one lay people know) explains the findings, wh...
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Funny story: Self Driving Car Crashes After Texting And Playing Pokemon Go

Self Driving Car Crashes After Texting And Playing Pokemon Go

Self driving cars were supposed to usher in a safe new era of travel for everyone on the road, but in the latest failure of the technology, a Google car has crashed into a police station in Lakewood Co. After analyzing recorders in the car, Google...
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Funny story: Scientists Work on Time Machine to Take Them Back Before Trump Became the Republican Nominee

Scientists Work on Time Machine to Take Them Back Before Trump Became the Republican Nominee

Science Town, USA Scientists, appalled at the thought of Trump becoming President of the U.S., once again began working feverishly on the time machine that they first started when Bush defeated Gore in 2000. "I'm not sure what we could do about Tr...
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Funny story: Trump Talks About How Science Enslaves People

Trump Talks About How Science Enslaves People

Podunk, ND Trump gave a speech today about how he had seen an HBO special in his hotel room about how people were being abused by Science. "On the HBO program I saw how Science had kidnapped people, and how they would make people disconnect from t...
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Funny story: Trump Gets Science and Math Confused

Trump Gets Science and Math Confused

Loafers Glory, NC In North Carolina, on a town hall campaign stop, Donald Trump was asked by a high school girl what his favorite subjects in school were. "Well, I liked that one with all the dirt and dinosaurs and elements like gold and stuff," s...
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Skews Me
Joined: 07 March 2007
Stories Written: 140

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