Funny story: Hulk Hogan and Jesse Ventura are Actually Women, Doctor at NASA Discovers

Hulk Hogan and Jesse Ventura are Actually Women, Doctor at NASA Discovers

JACKSONVILLE, Fla. - Hulk Hogan and Jesse Ventura are actually women and are not men at all, and both came kicking and screaming into this world with feminine genitals, a NASA senior medical doctor discovered late last week. NASA, which does inte...
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Women Live Longer Than Men Because They Aren't Married To Women

Studies show in a deep part of missouri that indeed, women do in fact live longer than men because they aren't married to women. Donald Trump says he "isn't really surprised" by the news. A local bystander by the name of 'Dick Trickle' says "he f...
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Scientists: Anus Will Replace Fingerprint for Security Checks

Scientists are now predicting that the anus will soon replace fingerprints for security, such as gaining entry to a building, or to computers and other sensitive or high clearance materials or locations. The anus it seems is even more complex and ind...
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Funny story: U.N. To Build Small Orbiting Planet

U.N. To Build Small Orbiting Planet

At first it was considered a wild rumor only. "We can't even get along here on the earth, how will we get together on one we build?" However, some of the things we are receiving from Edward Snowden shows that, for our own good, several major natio...
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Funny story: For First Time, Hard Drive Crashes Surpasses Car Crashes in Washington DC

For First Time, Hard Drive Crashes Surpasses Car Crashes in Washington DC

Washington D.C. - An epidemic of hard drive crashes is sweeping this city and, for the first time in history, the number has exceeded the total number of car crashes that have occurred within the city limits since 2011. It is truly uncanny how man...
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Sarah Palin Says Her Grandpa Used Dinosaurs to Plow the Fields

SOMEWHERE IN ALASKA Former vice-presidential candidate and governor of Alaska Sarah Palin, a devout creationist, stated today that it was true that dinosaurs and homo sapiens existed at the same time because she remembers that her grandparents had to...
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MRI scans reveal 2,500 year old Siberian princess died of acute cannabis deficiency

Siberia, Russia - An ancient Siberian mummy has tested positive for a cute cannabis deficiency. MRI scans reveal it 'dislocated her joints' and blew her skull wide open high up in the Altai Mountains circa BC500. The remains were discovered p...
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Funny story: Apple Ends Our Misery

Apple Ends Our Misery

Recently, while describing the new iOS8 software capabilities, Apple representatives ended the press release with a vague statement, "…among other things." Young adults, none of whom actually pay for their phones or services thanks to parental guilt...
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Breaking News...

Obama... Ordinary like us.

Yesterday, President Obama was refused entry into a restaurant for not wearing a tie and later fined for double parking and... ordered to return his library books... and thrown off a tram...and...


 
Funny story: Crop circle circumcises Cerne Abbas Giant's dick

Crop circle circumcises Cerne Abbas Giant's dick

Cerne Abbas, Dorset - A crop circle has been blamed for emasculating the huge erect penis of a 180ft ancient Neolithic colossus known as the Cerne Abbas Dick. Uh, Giant. Carved into a Dorset chalk hillock over 10,000 years ago the club-wielding f...
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Funny story: Science Proves That the Earth Was Destroyed Millions of Years Ago

Science Proves That the Earth Was Destroyed Millions of Years Ago

Scientists announced today that they have discovered light rays emanating from space that show the Earth being destroyed by a meteor swarm 21 million years ago. When asked why we didn't remember or find evidence of such a calamity before, one of...
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Funny story: iPads implanted in human fetus, starts texting at 5 months!

iPads implanted in human fetus, starts texting at 5 months!

In a press release today, the Cleveland Clinic in conjunction with several other teaching hospitals around the country announced that they had successfully implanted I-Pads in human fetus! "What is amazing," said Dr. T. J. McCorkle of The Clevela...
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Funny story: Sarah Palin and Alaskans Complain About Sardine Cum Polluting Waters

Sarah Palin and Alaskans Complain About Sardine Cum Polluting Waters

Anchorage - Sardines entering coastal waters off Alaska have once again left a milky substance for miles of Alaskan coastline, causing conservatives to complain about the open display of unwanton sex! "It's just disgusting!" said Sarah Palin, "All...
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Funny story: For Everyone to See: Divorce Notices via Jumbotron

For Everyone to See: Divorce Notices via Jumbotron

Arlington, TX-A group of local divorce lawyers have teamed up with Jerry Jones, owner of the Dallas Cowboys, to offer a newfangled way of delivering divorce notices to spouses. They will put them on the over 3,000 Sony® LCD displays around th...
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Funny story: Apple launches iPhone 6 with holographic Caller ID Image

Apple launches iPhone 6 with holographic Caller ID Image

Cupertino, California - A full-screen sized hologram of Caller Identity Images will be popping up each time Apple's swish new all-bells-and-whistles iPhone 6 gets an incoming or makes an outgoing call. And a new voice-over feature will see hologr...
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Funny story: United Launch Alliance and Russia Claim NASA

United Launch Alliance and Russia Claim NASA

Orlando, Cuba - The United Launch Alliance (ULA), a monopolistic joining of Boeing and Lockheed that is wholly dependent on Russian rockets, has stepped from the closet and taken sides with their suppliers. Speaking at a media resource event in Or...
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Funny story: Edinburgh Zoo's panda on medical marijuana program after 'losing' cub

Edinburgh Zoo's panda on medical marijuana program after 'losing' cub

Edinburgh, Scotland - Feckless time-wasting panda Tian Tian has been accused of faking yet another pregnancy despite a certificate of fecundity from keepers at Shanghai Zoo from which she is on loan. Scottish veterinarians had become convinced the...
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Dr. Billingsgate
Dr. Billingsgate
Joined: 22 February 2010
Stories Written: 379

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