Funny story: For First Time, Hard Drive Crashes Surpasses Car Crashes in Washington DC

For First Time, Hard Drive Crashes Surpasses Car Crashes in Washington DC

Washington D.C. - An epidemic of hard drive crashes is sweeping this city and, for the first time in history, the number has exceeded the total number of car crashes that have occurred within the city limits since 2011. It is truly uncanny how man...
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My new pet just arrived UPS, and man is he cool!

I just got the best pet in the world. A Goliath Birdeater, a spider that's been shipped from the Amazon Rain Forest to my little abode in New Jersey. My Goliath Birdeater has the dubious honor of being the largest arachnid in the world. It's about...
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Donald Trump Will Keep Donating Money to Science Until they Find a Way to Make Him Immortal

New York, NY-Blowhard billionaire Donald Trump stated in a press conference that he was afraid for the world after he had passed. "I know there will be widespread mourning and depression when the Donald leaves this mortal coil and I want to try to...
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Funny story: Planets Stand Still - Steven Hawking Changing O.S. Rebooting In 5 Mins . . . . .Please Wait

Planets Stand Still - Steven Hawking Changing O.S. Rebooting In 5 Mins . . . . .Please Wait

Tidal Waves, Earthquakes, Tsunamis and Volcanic Plasma Flows ravaged the earth at 2.00 am. this morning for 1000th of one second as Steven Hawking changed the O.S. of the solar system from Windows to Mac. "The changeover went smoothly with minimum...
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Funny story: Farting Adds To Your Life Expectancy

Farting Adds To Your Life Expectancy

Scientists in an international project located in Bordeaux, France, have declared the relevancy of he "fart" to the health of humans. "Farts," said Franz Lipken, the German member of the team, "are fun. They give people the chance to relax and...
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Sarah Palin and Alaskans Complain About Sardine Cum Polluting Waters

Anchorage - Sardines entering coastal waters off Alaska have once again left a milky substance for miles of Alaskan coastline, causing conservatives to complain about the open display of unwanton sex! "It's just disgusting!" said Sarah Palin, "All...
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Elite Squad of Twitter Birdies Handles the Queen's Tweets

Shortly after it was announced that the Queen had sent her first tweet it's been revealed that only "special" Twitter birds are entrusted with the royal tweets. Not just any old birdie will do. In addition to possessing a royal pedigree (commone...
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Funny story: Hulk Hogan and Jesse Ventura are Actually Women, Doctor at NASA Discovers

Hulk Hogan and Jesse Ventura are Actually Women, Doctor at NASA Discovers

JACKSONVILLE, Fla. - Hulk Hogan and Jesse Ventura are actually women and are not men at all, and both came kicking and screaming into this world with feminine genitals, a NASA senior medical doctor discovered late last week. NASA, which does inte...
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Breaking News...

New York now belongs to the Polar Circle!

The deep freeze hitting northeast US has forced Google Maps to enter the area into the Polar circle. Eskimos and Polar Bears were seen playing in the snow after deserting their global-warmed homeland!
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Funny story: "People You May Know" Removed From Facebook

"People You May Know" Removed From Facebook

It has been scientifically proven that anyone who has added someone after finding them through the 'people you may know' feature on Facebook is a colossal cretin, leading Facebook to delete the feature. Social networking research experts Pew Resea...
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Funny story: Evolution Confirmed in Lost Bible

Evolution Confirmed in Lost Bible

JERUSALEM- Archaeologists have discovered a lost book from the Christian New Testament, allegedly confirming the principles of evolution. The work was found in a cave near the city of Jerusalem. Entitled the 'Book of GEROM', (Genetic Evoluti...
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Funny story: Smoking Not Bad For You Says Research

Smoking Not Bad For You Says Research

New research is suggesting that smoking is not dangerous, does not cause strokes, heart disease or lung cancer and, in some cases, may improve quality of life and increase lifespan. The study and research, carried out by a conglomeration of scient...
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Funny story: United Launch Alliance and Russia Claim NASA

United Launch Alliance and Russia Claim NASA

Orlando, Cuba - The United Launch Alliance (ULA), a monopolistic joining of Boeing and Lockheed that is wholly dependent on Russian rockets, has stepped from the closet and taken sides with their suppliers. Speaking at a media resource event in Or...
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Funny story: Apple launches iPhone 6 with holographic Caller ID Image

Apple launches iPhone 6 with holographic Caller ID Image

Cupertino, California - A full-screen sized hologram of Caller Identity Images will be popping up each time Apple's swish new all-bells-and-whistles iPhone 6 gets an incoming or makes an outgoing call. And a new voice-over feature will see hologr...
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Funny story: Dolphins Fitted With Microphones Swear A Lot

Dolphins Fitted With Microphones Swear A Lot

Marine Biologists fitting Dolphins with voice headsets have reported that they all swear profusely. They are apparently very intelligent fish, but use the "F" and "C" words all the time. UnderSeaworld, the Corporate Entertainment giant who though...
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Funny story: Crop circle circumcises Cerne Abbas Giant's dick

Crop circle circumcises Cerne Abbas Giant's dick

Cerne Abbas, Dorset - A crop circle has been blamed for emasculating the huge erect penis of a 180ft ancient Neolithic colossus known as the Cerne Abbas Dick. Uh, Giant. Carved into a Dorset chalk hillock over 10,000 years ago the club-wielding f...
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Funny story: Pediatricians Urge Parents to Read Aloud to Kids, Starting at Birth

Pediatricians Urge Parents to Read Aloud to Kids, Starting at Birth

"Yippee!" said one bookseller when she heard the news. She continued,"This is our big chance to dump our inventory of kids' books." Giving a thumbs-up sign to an assistant, she said, "Get all the junk onto the selling floor and prepare to sell, sel...
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Bryan McManus
Bryan McManus
Joined: 22 February 2010
Stories Written: 13

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