Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Cheryl Cole

Saturday, 9 January 2010

image for Big Feud Erupts As Cheryl Cole Mentions Lily Allen's Third Nipple
Lily Allen showing the belt buckle that Queen Elizabeth II gave her as a Christmas gift.

LONDON - Cheryl Cole was asked about the song which Lily Allen wrote which mentions her in the lyrics as well as in the title.

Cheryl replied that she thought that it was nice of Lily to mention her in her song "Cheryl Tweedy."

But when Cheryl was told that the words were not complimentary and were actually meant to make fun of her she exploded.

Cheryl started ranting and raving and saying how dare that little Lily twat make fun of her like that.

When Cole was asked why she felt that Lily had poked fun at her the way she did she replied that it was probably due to two reasons. One she was sure that Lily was probably on her period when she wrote the song and two, she was just mad because she has three nipples whereas she (Cheryl) only has two like most normal women do.

Allen was asked if Cole was right about what she had said. The 24-year-old Allen said that Cole was wrong about her having written the song when she was on her period. She said that she had already been off her period for six days when she wrote it.

Lily then stated that regarding the third nipple, Cheryl was in fact correct about that, but she added that it was pretty much common knowledge that she was born with polythelia, which is having an extra nipple.

Allen said that several famous people were born with polythelia including Carrie Underwood, Mark Wahlberg, and Ann Boleyn, the second wife of Henry the VIII.

The Hammersmith native, Lily Allen said that she heard that Cheryl has two G-Spots, but that doesn't mean that she is going to just go around telling everyone.

In other news. The city of Rome has finally agreed to make the much needed improvements to the Roman Coliseum. A spokesperson for the city council said that all the council members agreed that the improvements are centuries overdo.

Phase 1 will include putting a roof over the coliseum to keep it from deteriorating any more and Phase 2 will include painting and completely carpeting the entire structure.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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