Funny story: Russian man who was given suspended prison sentence for vandalising Colosseum denies he was ever in Rome

Russian man who was given suspended prison sentence for vandalising Colosseum denies he was ever in Rome

A Russian tourist visiting the city of Rome was given a suspended jail sentence yesterday by an Italian court for committing an act of vandalism. The resident of Moscow scrawled the words "This belongs to Mother Russia" on the ancient Colosseum. T...
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Councillor Resigns Over "Parasites" Tweet

A late night tweet by Dr. Bernard-Fortesque-SmallPeace of the Council for the Rehabilitation of Bloodsucking Creatures, labelling tapeworms as good for nothing parasites has upset the Society for for symbiotic organism equality. Dr. Fortescue-S...
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Queen and Prince Philip Keep Location a Secret to Hide from Charles and Camille

London, UK It was leaked by Buckingham Palace that the reason that no one knows where the Queen and Prince Philip are holidaying is that they wanted to go somewhere where Charles and Camilla can't locate them. "I don't want ONE MORE holiday ruined...
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Funny story: UKIP triumph in Rochester & Screwed

UKIP triumph in Rochester & Screwed

Kent - A British far-tight party has swept to orifice in a K*nt by-election won by some turncoat ex-Tory twat. Mark Feckless, 69, won the Rochester and Screwed by-election by 2,920 votes after coming second in a previous Pole. Uh, poll. UK Prim...
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Funny story: "Offended" Woman to Sue

"Offended" Woman to Sue

A 23 year old London woman is to sue British Rail for what she claims is "personal trauma". It seems the woman boarded a subway train on the Bakerloo line on her way home from work. Then a couple of young men seated opposite her made what she cal...
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Robot Butchers wins pie making award

Archibald Braithwait is a 3rd generation master butcher however he has been gazumped by his 5th generation robot butcher in this years annual pie making awards held in Edinburgh. Braithwait & Sons & Son introduced technology to their butc...
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Labour shadow cabinet minister apologises for spray painting a phallic symbol on a Rochester voter's wall and tweeting a photo of it

Labour front bencher Seely Kau today expressed "regret for any offence I may have caused" after tweeting a photograph she had taken of a Rochester UKIP voter's house on which she had spray painted a phallus. Ms Kau, who lives in a £3 million house...
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Funny story: Most Xmas Turkeys Ready Now Due To Global Warming

Most Xmas Turkeys Ready Now Due To Global Warming

A glut of enormous fat turkeys in Norfolk is a result of early ripening due to global warming, our Christmas fowl correspondent was told by the Bishop of Norfolk this morning. This is the second year running that the church has got it wrong since mo...
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Breaking News...

New York now belongs to the Polar Circle!

The deep freeze hitting northeast US has forced Google Maps to enter the area into the Polar circle. Eskimos and Polar Bears were seen playing in the snow after deserting their global-warmed homeland!
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Funny story: Bear necessities now include a chauffeur in Russia

Bear necessities now include a chauffeur in Russia

In a shock report from the University of Novosibirsk, Russia, it has been found that just 1% of Russian brown bears now own 60% of territory in the country. Inequality of bear wealth has increased sharply since the fall of communism. The report gi...
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Funny story: Isle of Wight News - Island Too Long. E.U. To Shorten It By 3.45 Km.

Isle of Wight News - Island Too Long. E.U. To Shorten It By 3.45 Km.

The Isle of Wight has fallen foul of E.U. regulations by being above the mandatory 65 mile maximum length for a British Isle. The Isle, famous for its Rock Festivals and sequence dancing has steadfastly refused to lop 2 miles from its length, even th...
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Funny story: Kippers flounder over Euro-footy plaices

Kippers flounder over Euro-footy plaices

Nigel Farage has always been more of a coelacanth - an extinct fossil - than a bream come true. But now his "whaling" threatens the flying fish of his populist campaign as a cod-right winger. But enough fishy metaphors. UKIP members - commonly ref...
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Funny story: Isle of Wight Latest - New Airport Terminal Name Is Leaked

Isle of Wight Latest - New Airport Terminal Name Is Leaked

The new flagship £5000 Isle of Wight Bembridge airport terminal is to be named T.8 in an official ceremony tomorrow according to leaked documents. The product of ten years of planning, expensive ground breaking engineering achievements and dogged det...
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Funny story: Hollywood Movie on Banking... the Whole Nine Yards!

Hollywood Movie on Banking... the Whole Nine Yards!

A new film "The Banker" is set to make Hollywood history. Starring Kevin Costner, Al Pacino, Joe Pizza, Marcella Pretzel and Kevin Downey Junior... this could be the film of the decade. It lifts the lid off the American banking fraternity for good. A...
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Funny story: London Mayor Boris Johnson has denied that he plans to run for Pope next year

London Mayor Boris Johnson has denied that he plans to run for Pope next year

Boris, who has been in charge of the nation's capital for several years now and is well-known for his unruly hair, eccentric way of talking and extra marital affairs, says that he has never considered being Pope and would not be qualified for the job...
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Funny story: Isle of Wight News - Record Breaking Mole-Hill

Isle of Wight News - Record Breaking Mole-Hill

The Isle of Wight has yet another world record to add to the burgeoning collection of records held in Newport Town hall, when it was discovered that the World's Largest Mole Hill has been discovered in Merstone. "Not many people visit Merstone," s...
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Funny story: Divorce Saudi Arabian style

Divorce Saudi Arabian style

Jeddah, Saudi Arabia - A young Saudi bridgegroom who filed for divorce after less than ten minutes of marriage has appeared before a special Sharia court to explain his actions. Speaking via a divorce lawyer Kamel al-Moussa explained the marriage...
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Bryan McManus
Bryan McManus
Joined: 22 February 2010
Stories Written: 13

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