Funny story: Pensioners' bus trip goes awry

Pensioners' bus trip goes awry

A group of Dorking pensioners' bus trip to the south of France suffered a mishap yesterday when a satnav error led the driver to deliver the elderly tourists to a euthanasia clinic in Switzerland. Sadly all seventeen of the passengers were slaughtere...
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Police have tazered kids, but it's an act of kindness

British Police have multi - tazered University Students, now it appears they have tazered kids, teenagers of 14. 'It's really just to give them a light reprimand, as opposed to being shot dead', says DCI Jonny Tennyson 'We are issued with bulle...
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Queen Defends The Fabulous

The Queen of the Purple Isles has hit back at suggestions that The Fabulous should be banned from socialising with so-called 'Ordinaries'. Harry Rump of the Roundguts claimed that The Fabulous are a bizarre group who differ on every conceivable so...
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Funny story: UKIP Offers Voters Marmite

UKIP Offers Voters Marmite

UKIP has taken to the streets of Britain, handing out free jars of marmite to passers-by as a goodwill gesture to potential voters. In the run-up to the election, the party is determined to ensure it remains in the political race. UKIP original...
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Funny story: Health officials warn "Toblerone in a fridge" is a lethal weapon

Health officials warn "Toblerone in a fridge" is a lethal weapon

Top health officials have issued a warning to people not to put Toblerones in a fridge. They state that when the triangular chocolate bar becomes cold and hard it can become a "lethal weapon capable of damaging members of the public and even buildin...
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Queen caught sneaking out of the Palace and pretending to be a homeless person again

Members of the royal family and local security picked up the Queen yesterday after she went missing from Buckingham Palace. Palace guards reported her gone at lunch time shortly after Sunday mass. Prince Charles and Camilla then drove round the...
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Bashar al-Assad claims he is in trouble

Bashar al-Assad claims he is economically devastated since he decided to squash democracy. Reports are surfacing that ISIS is planning new tactics on the al-Assad regime by sending agents into al-Assad's territory to convert and unite an undergrou...
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Funny story: Whyalla, the undiscovered gem in South Australia

Whyalla, the undiscovered gem in South Australia

Whyalla, South Australia is a steel making town nestled in the picturesque desert region of the what is quaintly called the "Iron Triangle". Whyalla is progressive town with many attractions such as the world famous Whyalla Foreshore Cafe and the...
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Breaking News...

Ancient Hercules statue returning to Italy 2,500 years after theft

Damn Etruscan thieves sentenced to 12 months community service after pleading guilty to smash and grab
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Funny story: Toxic cloud billows over Catatonia

Toxic cloud billows over Catatonia

Spain - A huge orange cloud of toxic crap has erupted from a chemical plant at Igualada in Spain's notoriously brain-dead region of Catatonia. Firefighters described the fumes as a heady cocktail of nitric acid, ferric chloride and the orange foo...
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Funny story: Iain Duncan Smith says that anyone healthy enough to claim benefits doesn't need benefits

Iain Duncan Smith says that anyone healthy enough to claim benefits doesn't need benefits

Secretary of State for Work and Pensions Iain Duncan Smith has outlined a new philosophy on benefit claimants while talking to the BBC, suggesting that anyone well enough to claim benefits probably doesn't need them. Speaking of people with mental...
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Funny story: Elgin Marbles Row - Britain Cheated, Claims Greek Games Minister

Elgin Marbles Row - Britain Cheated, Claims Greek Games Minister

The Greek minister for skipping and street games, Mr. Aristos Popadopalus Papadopolus has accused the late Lord Elgin of cheating and using illegally weighted marbles in the 1800 contest in which he won a ship full of priceless "marble" marbles.
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Funny story: Munch bunch on strike

Munch bunch on strike

Cornflakes, Frosties and Co-co Pops have all indicated they will take industrial action at the beginning of the week after it was revealed that a former serial killer who ate his victims, has been made CEO of Kellogs. Many other breakfast staples...
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Funny story: Rage in the streets of London as sleeping rough protest

Rage in the streets of London as sleeping rough protest

A wealthy Indian billionaire is upsetting homeless people in London after using anti homeless spikes outwith his London residential complex. A homeless spokeswoman named Alice Cornfoot complains that the population in Britain is increasing while...
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Funny story: German Dominatrix Handcuffs Obama To Podium: 50 Shades Of Ukraine

German Dominatrix Handcuffs Obama To Podium: 50 Shades Of Ukraine

BILLINGSGATE POST: German Chancellor Angela Merkel performed a dominatrix hat trick on willing participant Barack Obama as Vladimir Putin watched on with bemused interest. With the fate of Ukraine hanging in balance, President Barack Obama allowed...
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Funny story: All Priests Should Be Castrated After Taking Vows says Children's Council

All Priests Should Be Castrated After Taking Vows says Children's Council

Dr. Meyer Pipick, head of The World Council to Prevent Child Rape, said today from Berne, Switzerland has announced that castration is the only way to stop priests from sexually violating children. He said: 'It is now obvious that nothing can sto...
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Funny story: Greek banks go begging in streets of Athens!

Greek banks go begging in streets of Athens!

Distraught Greek bank personnel and managers were spotted carrying begging bowls along the streets of Athens and other major cities in the country! After refusing to accept the EU's reforms and repayment conditions Greek multi-millionaires and nor...
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Jean Le Fete
Jean Le Fete
Joined: 14 May 2007
Stories Written: 300

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