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Previously believed to be popular entertainers Ant and Dec were today horrified to learn that not only are they actually unpopular, but they are despised by the average TV viewer.
A top UK clothing retailer, has announced that its pre-tax profits are down 89% for the year ending April 2008, fuelling speculation that it may have to shed jobs throughout the organisation.
Wine boffin Oz Clarke today let the cat out of the bag and exposed the Wine World's biggest secret - it's all a pile of pretentious tosh.
Crawford, TX - Austria's famous Dungeon Master, Josef Fritzl, has sent his regrets to Laura Bush today, expressing his sadness over missing Jenna Bush's wedding that is taking place this Satu...
ITV has been fined a record £5m plus by Ofcom for abusing premium rate phone services in viewer competitions.
Former New England Patriots employee turned over the eight tapes to National Football Commissioner. All eight tapes were to show footage of the teams that were videotaped and the value of the tape's content that New England received from knowing opponent's sideline signals which are used to set up defensive formations.
Drug riddled rock stars Pete Docherty and Amy Winehouse were caught in a clinch tonight by a group of paparazzi in an intimate rendezvous behind her local kebab shop.
HOUSTON, TX - Following through on the Bush Administration's support for faith-based science initiatives, the National Aeronautics and Space Administration has announced the 2010 launch of its Faith Science Mission (FSM) probe, which is tasked with searching for the elusive object known as Russell's Teapot.
Co-Founder of Ice Cream Parlor Chain Passes Away At Age 90
Surviving founders Mr. Baskin, Mr. Robbins, and Mr. Flavors all say that they will miss Mr. 31.Times Square to be renamed Comic Sans Square
New York Mayor Elliot Screwzer today confirmed the name change to the iconic landmark. 'It just seems a bit friendlier..you know..more jokey', he said whilst paying £3000 an hour to some skank.Brown accepts McDonalds job
Former Prime Minister Gordon Brown has accepted a job taking orders at McDonalds. He joins former Mayor Ken Livingstone, who is flipping burgers at the Peckham branch.Livngstone has lost Erection
The Tokyo Times has reported that London Mayor, Ken Livingstone has lost his erection!Bad Hair Day
May 2nd 2008 will go down in history as a bad hair day in politics - not only did Labour suffer massive losses, Nick Clegg of the Lib/Dems and Boris Johnson also had bad hair days.What a Waste!
American Medical Scientists have determined that the average male member is 6 inches long, and the average female orifice is 8 inches deep? So in New York City alone there is over 2 miles of unused pussy!Student Counts Times Obama's Name Is Said, Wins Math Prize
Dexter Claponclapoff from Maine discovered the longest number ever recorded, by writing a program on his PC whcih counts how many times the word Obama is used in 12 hours of TV viewing. He was awarded the first Nobel Prize for Math ever given.Is John McCain Insane? Docs Test Says Yes!
Insane in the membrane. Doctors at Idaho's Mr. Potatohead Psychiatric Clinic finish a 4 day test of John McCain's brain and determined his is equivalent to a microwaved ant on LSD & is predicted to act as kooky as Bush or Cheney.
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