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10#8514#Bureau#39996.7061111#1

Supreme Court Decision

The United States Supreme Court has decided to finally hand down a ruling on the couple that had that argument two years ago and kept the whole neighborhood up all night.

8#8514#Bureau#39996.7043519#2

Nurse Tried Everything

Nurse attending Michael Jackson that she tried everything, even clicking his heels together three times.

10#9135#The San Francisco Onion#39996.5969097#3

Raising a stink

High-end neighborhood's residents demand Porta-John company manufacture facilities that blend better with community, tired of teal eyesores in front of multi-million dollar properties.

10#9135#The San Francisco Onion#39996.5934606#4

A show of hands

California police getting cramps writing tickets as countless motorists ignore hands free phone law. Last text sent by one man reads:

wtf just got pulled over :(

6#10310#tlmedia#39996.5771296#5

The Economy Is So Bad

Even muggers can't find work.

2#10310#tlmedia#39996.5757523#6

The Greatest Practical Joke In The World

Hack into a hospital computer and change all the patient orders to Do Not Resuscitate. What fun!

2#10310#tlmedia#39996.5746644#7

My Family Was So Poor

They couldn't have children

2#10310#tlmedia#39996.5742361#8

Michael Jackson Was An Alien

Where else would he learn the "Moon Walk?" Makes sense to me!

8#8514#Bureau#39996.5740856#9

Combined 3,000 Pounds Too Much

Seven top executives resign at Krispy Kreme Headquarters after building collapse.

10#8514#Bureau#39996.5713542#10

New Viagra Warnings

Warning proposed for Viagra, Cialis, Levitra: "The Surgeon General has determined that this product could affect brain cells, could cause blondness.

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