Funny story: Woman Looses Breast Implant In Vacuum Cleaner Mishap

Woman Looses Breast Implant In Vacuum Cleaner Mishap

Spartanburg, SC: A bag-less upright is bag-less no more. On Friday a woman was convalescing from a breast augmentation when a tragedy occurred. Around 1:15 PM police and medical personnel were dispatched to the home of a hysterical husband. Lt. Br...
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Plastic surgeons gave Angelina stick-on nipple falsies says Syrian ambassador

New York - They were the only real point of interest at the United Nations today when the Hollywood actress turned up to lecture officials on lipgloss and trout-pout following her controversial mastectomy op. The monotony of the session was soon...
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Blues Singer Fired By His Own Wife, Who Then Leaves Him For New Employee

Braxton, Mississippi - Henry Johnson Jr., a Mississippi Delta blues singer, was fired from his job at an auto tire shop by his own wife today, who then had sex with another man she hired to replace him. "The other man had no auto tire shop experie...
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Funny story: Pittsburgh Area Commuter Breaks Down

Pittsburgh Area Commuter Breaks Down

A Pittsburgh area commuter bus suffered a severe breakdown during it's morning run yesterday, leaving 75 passengers stranded during rush hour. The 8:41 Forbes Street left on schedule, but about 5 minutes into it's run, the bus suddenly shuddered, sho...
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Funny story: Californians Sick Of Producing Nation's Almonds

Californians Sick Of Producing Nation's Almonds

Los Alamos, New Mexico - Known as the desert home of the nuclear bomb, Los Alamos, New Mexico has become a kind of refuge for Californians sick of working in the Almond industry. "It's not an industry," said a self-descirbed "almond refugee" who a...
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Republican Hopeful Marco Rubio, "I Would Happily Eat The Right Testicle Of A Gay Gingerbread Man Left For Santa By Lesbian Test Tube Grandma"

Tampa Bay, Florida - Republican Presidential Candidate Marco Rubio had hoped saying he would attend a gay wedding if invited would be the end of him having to comment on hypothetical homosexual scenarios, but his answer has only encouraged more quest...
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Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Opens Inductee Nursing Home Next Door

CLEVELAND - A little known news item from the recent 2015 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame ceremonies which saw musical legends like Stevie Ray Vaughan, Lou Reed, and Joan Jett and the Blackhearts, to name a few, inducted into the Rock Hall, was the op...
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Funny story: Iowans to Clinton, "Give Us Money For Not Growing Corn"

Iowans to Clinton, "Give Us Money For Not Growing Corn"

Des Moines, IA - Continuing her van tour of Iowa, Democratic Presidential Candidate Hilary Clinton told a table full of everyday Americans that "she heard their concerns." "If I could sum up what all of you said, you want to stop working and enjoy...
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Breaking News...

New Jersey Gov Has New Promotion Gig

Chris Christie was named by the American Lard Assn as their new spokesperson. Lard Ass President Bud Gristel named the Gov after learning that Christie's favorite book is The Count of Mounds of Crisco
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Funny story: Senate Confirms Loretta Lynch As Attorney General

Senate Confirms Loretta Lynch As Attorney General

Washington DC - The fuckin' Senate confirmed President Obama's God damned nominee for Attorney General today. "I am very glad to have received their fuckin' approval," said Loretta Lynch, the first African-American woman to ever serve as America's...
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Funny story: President Obama Issues Executive Order, Combining ATF, USDA, GMOs and Climate Change

President Obama Issues Executive Order, Combining ATF, USDA, GMOs and Climate Change

WASHINGTON, DC - President Obama issued an executive order today, directing the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF), United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) to be combined into one department. Mr. Obama's spokesman, T...
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Funny story: Canada Seeks To Trade Away The Biebs

Canada Seeks To Trade Away The Biebs

Ottawa, Ontario - Canada's Department of National Beaver Pelts and Other Foreign Trades, has initialized negotiations with its #1 trading partner, the U.S., to see which downtrodden celebrities they might be able to get in exchange for Pop-Star, Just...
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Funny story: Clinton Foundation Donation From Kazakhstan Uranium Company Raises Spectre of Bribery

Clinton Foundation Donation From Kazakhstan Uranium Company Raises Spectre of Bribery

Washington DC - A Fox News investigation shows that just months after the Clinton foundation received a two million dollar contribution from the President of a Kazakh held Uranium company, the US State Department signed off giving that company privil...
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Funny story: Alabama Man Finally Delivers First Rape Baby!

Alabama Man Finally Delivers First Rape Baby!

Birmingham, AL - Cleevon Huckleby, 39, first became famous when he accidentally volunteered to become the very first man in America to have a fetus, tragically conceived during a sexual assault, shot into his stomach lining, in an effort to save the...
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Funny story: President Obama Proposes Building 10,000 Mile Dike To Protect USA From Climate Change

President Obama Proposes Building 10,000 Mile Dike To Protect USA From Climate Change

WASHINGTON, DC - This morning, President Obama proposed utilizing the USA's military to build a dike around the lower 48 states, combating climate change. The dike would be approximately 10,000 miles long and would be 6 inches tall, preventing ris...
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Funny story: Republican Presidential Hopefuls Spar On Educational Policy At Iowa Pork and Corn Dinner

Republican Presidential Hopefuls Spar On Educational Policy At Iowa Pork and Corn Dinner

Dubuque, Iowa - Republican Presidential Candidates debated educational policy on a makeshift stage at a Holiday Inn Express breakfast room in Dubuque, Iowa as potential Iowa caucus voters feasted on corn and corn fed pork dishes. Texas Senator Te...
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Funny story: Colorado Spends Some of its Mad 420 Loot!

Colorado Spends Some of its Mad 420 Loot!

Denver, Colorado - Governor John Chickencooper (R) wasn't so sure about letting his citizens grow mad weed and flog it out across the rest of America like a big weed rainbow, lighting up the sky - but he's sure enjoying the big pot of gold which has...
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Stevey G.
Stevey G.
Joined: 28 June 2010
Stories Written: 112

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