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Showing stories about: Barack Obama, CIA, GOP, Hollywood, Kim Jong Un, NFL, North Korea, Republicans, Seth Rogen, Sex, Sony, The Interview

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Funny story: New Scramjet replaces President's Scare Force One

New Scramjet replaces President's Scare Force One

Washington - A solar-powered supersonic combusting ramjet built from sustainable recycled carbon fiber and organic fairtrade hessian interior has been chosen as the new presidential runabout. The latest US Air Force acquisition will be a variant...
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Funny story: Green Bay Packers Are Communists Says Congressman

Green Bay Packers Are Communists Says Congressman

The Green Bay Packers are arguably the most successful franchise in American professional sports history. They just missed this year from going to the superbowel. But the most remarkable thing about the Green Bay Packers is that as an industry th...
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Funny story: NFL Has New Policy Against Cannabis Use

NFL Has New Policy Against Cannabis Use

The NFL is now extensively testing players before football games for marijuana usage. This is a recent policy change. National Footbal League Commissioner Roger Goodell gave an explanation. "The problem with Cannabis is that it is a 'peace" induc...
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Funny story: NFL Meeting to Develop 2015-16 Season Controversies

NFL Meeting to Develop 2015-16 Season Controversies

Like all businesses, publicity is an important part of the NFL. So important that the NFL is holding a mandatory owners meeting on Monday after the Superbowl to discuss publicity for 2015. "2014 was such a great year with Ray Rice, a gay player,...
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Funny story: Indianapolis coach's explanation "not convincing," Science Guy says

Indianapolis coach's explanation "not convincing," Science Guy says

Bill Nigh, the Science Guy, a die-hard Indianapolis Dolts fan, hypothesizes that the explanation of the New England Playoffs coach, Bill Bellyache, that global warming is the cause of his team's under-inflated balls is "dubious at best." Climate...
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Funny story: Plethysmographic Research says Conservatives are Sexually Repressed and Brain Damaged

Plethysmographic Research says Conservatives are Sexually Repressed and Brain Damaged

Dr Moishe Pipick head of The Worldwide Center for Sexual Research at Berne University in Berne Switzerland stated today: "Our latest analysis of the causes of regressive behavior seen mostly in Christian Conservatives clearly shows that sexual re...
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Funny story: President Obama Sending Glozell Green to Conduct Nuclear Talks With Iran

President Obama Sending Glozell Green to Conduct Nuclear Talks With Iran

PENTAGON - Following his interview with YouTube sensation Glozell Green, President Obama was so impressed with the human bundle of energy that he announced she will be replacing the worthless and lame Secretary of State, John Kerry, in ongoing nu...
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Funny story: ISIS and Obummer agree: Israel's Nuttyyahoo "paranoid"

ISIS and Obummer agree: Israel's Nuttyyahoo "paranoid"

President Bareass Obummer is "hotter than a steaming pile of sh*t," according to Beltway insiders. "He's absolutely fuming!" What has the presidential bowels in such an uproar? Speaker of the House John Boner had the "audacity" to invite Israel...
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Funny story: Congress to Outlaw Coitus Interruptis - 'Just Another Sleazy Way to Avoid Pregnancy!

Congress to Outlaw Coitus Interruptis - 'Just Another Sleazy Way to Avoid Pregnancy!

A new Republican bill before Congress criminalizes coitus interruptis --the act of male withdrawal during heterosexual intercourse seconds before orgasm so as to avoid pregnancy. "If we're going to illegalize abortion and birth control," said Rep...
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Funny story: Obama Wraps Up State of the Union Speech on Skype

Obama Wraps Up State of the Union Speech on Skype

WASHINGTON, DC - President Obama wrapped up his State of the Union speech by Skyping with porn-star, Buster Hymen. The interview included queries about his favorite movie, what he wanted to be growing up, and what superpower he would like to possess.
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Funny story: For Traumworks' "Krazy Kat" Katzenberg, life is but a dream

For Traumworks' "Krazy Kat" Katzenberg, life is but a dream

HURRAY FOR HOLLYWOOD! -- For some 500 former employees, Traumworks is no longer a dream workplace. In fact, for the terminated workers, it's not even a dream job anymore. The animation studio was once the darling of Tinsel Town, but, due to a stri...
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Funny story: Senator Inhofe - Energy Committee Chair - Claims Fossil Fuels and CO2 "Great For Libido"

Senator Inhofe - Energy Committee Chair - Claims Fossil Fuels and CO2 "Great For Libido"

Jim Inhofe, chair of the environment and energy committee, has released findings from his own research that fossil fuels and CO2 are a natural elixir for the human spirit. Jim explained: "When I do barbecue at my ranch in Oklahoma and I eat that...
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Funny story: NFL commissioner reveals email that started inflategate investigation

NFL commissioner reveals email that started inflategate investigation

New York City, NY. - NFL commissioner, Roger Goodell, explained today that his investigation into ball pressure was sparked by an email. "I was at the stadium watching the game and dodging calls from Terrell Owens, then I received a mysterious em...
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Funny story: Mitch McConnel Calls for Vulgar Straight Talk With Obama

Mitch McConnel Calls for Vulgar Straight Talk With Obama

Senate Speaker Mitch McConnell speaking today, published verbatim. The president and I should start "Straight Talking" with one another and cut the crap! Look - everyone knows I'm a straight shooter - and so let's just cut the crap and have some conversations with each other that most Americans,and especially southern conservative can really relate to and understand! For example - Barak -...
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Funny story: For Romney, Third Time's the Charm

For Romney, Third Time's the Charm

WASHINGTON - It has surfaced that Mitt Romney has desire to run again for his third presidential bid. Although he has yet to officially throw his hat into the 2016 mix, sources close to him say that he is excited and has a good feeling about th...
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Funny story: Lights! Camera! Action! Amazon enters the movie business: now, THAT's entertainment!

Lights! Camera! Action! Amazon enters the movie business: now, THAT's entertainment!

Look out, Tinsel Town! Tired of being an entertainment middleman, Amazon.com has announced that it's going into the film-making business. "We're producing a movie a month," Amazon Studios Vice-President in Charge of Vice, Leroy Price, crowed. T...
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Funny story: The Astrology Channel pulls out of State of the Union coverage

The Astrology Channel pulls out of State of the Union coverage

Washington DC - Citing an off-color Mars/Neptune conjunction in Pisces followed by a psychotic Aquarius New Moon the acclaimed Astrology Channel has suddenly turned chicken. And cancelled Tuesday's live stream Presidential rant. It's the first...
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Funny story: 80% of Porn Searches are by Terrorists - Entire Culture Obsessed with Sex and Death

80% of Porn Searches are by Terrorists - Entire Culture Obsessed with Sex and Death

Teheran - Iranian sexologist Sheik Ratel-n-Rol, the "Renegade Imam" is on the run again tonight after publishing Goggle's 2014 statistical analysis of internet porn use on his popular "Under the Hijab" sex-discussion blog. According to the report...
View '80% of Porn Searches are by Terrorists - Entire Culture Obsessed with Sex and Death'
Funny story: 'He Has The Right To Remain Obnoxious' - GOP leader tells the Senate as Obama proposes massive tax hikes to soak the rich

'He Has The Right To Remain Obnoxious' - GOP leader tells the Senate as Obama proposes massive tax hikes to soak the rich

Washington - "The President has the right to remain obnoxious," US Senate majority leader Mitch McConnell said on the Sleazy-SS Channel's Fuck the Nation program in a timely free speech rant. "But he won't be getting a single red cent from decent...
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Funny story: Cheesy law regarding football spawns other gridiron lunacy

Cheesy law regarding football spawns other gridiron lunacy

BAINBRIDGE ISLAND, WA -- Bainbridge Island, Washington, has outlawed cheese. At least, during the upcoming NFC Championship game that pits the Seattle Seahawks against the Green Bay Packers. And it's not only cheese per se that's banned, but al...
View 'Cheesy law regarding football spawns other gridiron lunacy'
Funny story: Belichick Bets Infamous "Half-Sleeved Hoodie" on Championship Game

Belichick Bets Infamous "Half-Sleeved Hoodie" on Championship Game

Foxborough, MA - During Friday's post-practice interview, Patriot's head coach, Bill Belichick stated that he would "bet my hoodie that we take home the AFC championship this year." These are strong words from a reserved coach who has coached th...
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Funny story: Republican Party to Take Over the Name "Democrats"

Republican Party to Take Over the Name "Democrats"

Washington, DC In a surprise move, the majority party, the Republicans, also known as the GOP, voted to take over the name "Democrats" and "Democratic Party." The party members of the party formerly known as the Democrats all voted against the measur...
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Breaking News...

Irritable General Colon Bowel Syndrome flare-up among Israel-Hezbollah might be over

Colonic Irrigation Regiment sent in to flush out anyone crapping on tentative piss talks
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