There were 110 spoof news stories published in March 2016. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Ancient Wheel Displayed in Britain, Special Crooner at its Side!
The news that a 3,000-year-old wooden wheel had been found in Britain was, of course, exciting. But even more exciting was who was standing at its side when the wheel recently made its debut to the public. It was none other than the late, great cr...
Read full storySnow storm hits the Caribbean Islands
Local residents across the Caribbean Islands have woken up to find their usual warm and sunny climate is currently inaccessible due to an unusual winter blizzard that has slammed the region. Winds are howling at more than 70 mph, the Blizzard of 2...
Read full storyThe Science is in: Boogers Are Good For Your Brain
Parents, don't be so quick to slap down the hand of your booger eating child, they could be growing some serious brains. Scientists have discovered an entirely new class of compounds in boogers that they are calling cerebrogenic, or brain building.
Read full storyEarth Will Explode Soon Due to Hot Air From 2016 Elections
Science Town, USA Scientists studying the ozone layer of the Earth were flabbergasted when they compared the hot air emissions from 2014 to the hot air emissions from 2015. "The hot air being emitted in 2015 was 18 times higher than it was in 20...
Read full storyTrump Outlines Reasons He Should Be King of the USA Instead of Just President
New York, NY In his latest press conference, Donald Trump outlined his plan to "Make America Great Again." It included plans to dismantle the U.S. government, including the Judicial, Executive, and Legislative Branches, and make him King. He explaine...
Read full storyTrump Promises to Get Rid of "Bad Hair" Days
Besides building a wall that is one thousand feet tall, making the Mexicans pay for the concrete foundation, and Trump selling the multi-million dollar penthouse condominiums, he builds on this wall and the most pricey ones on the top of the wall, wi...
Read full storyModern Day Robin Hood of a Waiter gives away so many free drinks at a NYC restaurant that he is feloniously charged
New York, (NY) - William F. Powell, 27, was arrested on March 2 for giving distressed and disadvantaged IHOP patrons so many free drinks between Aug. 7, 2015 and Feb. 18 of this year that he might go to prison. Yes, these horrid acts of benevolent ca...
Read full storyTrump Exposed As "Drumpfy The Red Baboon"
In recent news, Donald Trump has denied allegations that he escaped from the Bronx Zoo in the early 1980s. This comes despite multiple sources of proof and science based evidence that have been stacked against the famed businessman turned presidenti...
Read full storyNew Keypad Let's You Butt Dial On Purpose
Chemist, and now inventor, Trevor Maxon is enabling people to accurately do on purpose what they always do by accident: butt dial. For our interview and demonstration this day, Maxon is wearing his Bluetooth enabled Boogie Pad Butt Dialer jeans.
Read full storyMan moans on Twitter about trying to write shopping list while shooting takes place outside
32 year old Simon Smith of Moss Side, Manchester has moaned about trying to write his shopping list as gang members shoot each other directly outside his house. Average resident Mr Smith took to Twitter to 'tell off' local gang members Kid Lowride...
Read full storyAmerica Not Ready for Trump Dollars, Announces Trump
New York, NY In a move that surprised no one but Trump's most devoted followers, Trump today announced that his "Trump Dollars" investments would be discontinued and that the Trump Dollar accounts had to be transferred to Trump's campaign fund. Trump...
Read full story2016 Election: A New Woody Allen Film
If you haven't already guessed, the 2016 election is really a Woody Allen film plot. Donald Trump, to be portrayed by Alec Baldwin, is a closet Democrat and a Hillary Clinton supporter, portrayed by Angela Lansbury. Donald never wanted to be pres...
Read full storyAmerican Political Dictionary (updated for the Age of Trump)
The 4th edition of the American Political Dictionary has just been published. Below is an excerpt. Available at bookstores nowhere. Active Shooter n. A white wingnut and/or terrorist with an assault weapon exercising his Second Amendment rights. See National Rifle Association. Alternative Facts. n. a rhetorical device employed by political surrogates of questionable character when re...
Read full storyNorth Korean Despot Kim Jong-Un Endorses Donald Trump
Pyongyang, North Korea A long-time admirer of Donald Trump, North Korean dictator and hater of the United States Kim Jong-Un gave a strong endorsement today for Donald Trump in the 2016 Presidential race. "I have learned many things from watching...
Read full storyBeating Trump's Bush!
With the US race for the White House hotting up, Jaggedone, decided to send his infamous CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) star reporter, Scumbag Sixlegged-Witherspoon-Jones, to one of Trump's most loyal sources of support, the local Loony Bin in downtown Boston, USA not England. Here his amazing, exclusive article after interviewing a group of inmates and dedicated followers: Question:Ladie...
Read full storyDr. Phil To Host Next Trump/Cruz Debate
America's favorite TV therapist is going to tackle the crack-up of the Donald Trump and Ted Cruz bromance. "These guys have a lot of anger they are expressing, but we really need to get to the root causes of their co-dependent mutually destructive...
Read full storySharapova, a grunt too many!
Maria Sharapova, Nr 1 world's best female tennis grunter, has admitted her secret weapon, screaming like a pregnant moose on the global tennis courts, was caused by using viagra to get her horny (Famous Louis van Gaal pep talk comment to his supersta...
Read full storyThe New, Improved Pledge of Allegiance
As it now stands, the Pledge of Allegiance as commonly recited in schools and at sporting events and political rallies is too simple and easy. One can chew on it without really tasting the Constitution. It allows one to dress up in the flag feeling all patriotic, self-righteous, and godly when one may be, in reality, venal and totally corrupt. Therefore, this New Pledge of Allegiance is propose...
Read full storyTrump "Disendows" David Duke On Live TV
Donald Trump spoke to CNNs Jake Tapper to finally clear up his view on the KKKs endorsement of him. "You want me to disendow David Duke, I disendow him, alright?" Trump's statement actually did little to settle the controversy. When Jake asked Tru...
Read full storyTrump: I Will Wear Pink Hillary Pantsuit If Defeated By Little Marco In Florida
BILLINGSGATE POST: A confident Donald Trump vowed to wear a pink Hillary pantsuit in the next debate if he is defeated by Little Marco in the Florida primary tomorrow. The counter-punching billionaire, stung by Little Marco's reference to his sma...
Read full storySheriff Joe Arpaio To Design Hillary's New Prison Uniform
BILLINGSGATE POST: The haute couture firm of Sheriff Joe Arpaio has been selected to design the prison uniform of Hillary Clinton pending her expected indictment by the Justice Department it was announced this morning by MSNBC's fashionable host, Ra...
Read full storyA 'Sploid' expose of a California sex doll factory sets blazing-glory journalism afire
When you're not in the mainstream media, you have to look for oddball and off-the-chain sorts of stories to write about. And that's exactly what writer Bryan Menegus and photographer Robert Benson did when they wrote an expose', coupled with a collag...
Read full story14 Killed in Political Correctness Rampage
ATHENS, AL -- The nation is in mourning today after 14 people lost their lives during a stream of inclusive, non-offensive phrases. The alleged culprit was identified as Jeffery Kleinfeld, 22, who locals knew as a perfectly racist, sexist white boy.
Read full storyTrump to be new 'Top Gear' presenter
In a shock move, the BBC announced today that Matt le Blanc would be replaced by the potential Republican nominee, Donald Trump, if he fails to win the presidency later this year. Le Blanc, who disgraced himself earlier this week by eating doughnu...
Read full storyTrump Proposes Country Invest In "Trump Dollars"
New York, NY Businessman and U.S. Presidential candidate Donald Trump convinced a gathering of his supporters to convert their cash into "Trump Dollars" today. He says that everyone should. "You get one Trump Dollar for every two U.S. dollars. Bel...
Read full storyPopularity Rating Of Boris Johnson Plummets In Wake Of EU Referendum Campaign
Recent polls have confirmed that the popularity of Boris Johnson amongst the British public has dramatically declined since 22nd February 2016. 'I'd never thought too hard about it,' said John Smith, a typical UK resident, 'but, in the past, me mi...
Read full storyTrump Announces Plan to Annex Mexico and Expel All the Rapists
New York, NY Donald Trump no longer wants to build a wall on the U.S.-Mexican border. Instead, he wants to annex Mexico to the United States and build a wall along the Mexico-Guatemala border. Trump said that all the rapists in Mexico would be sent t...
Read full storyGov. Pat McCrory, NC: "We don't want them homos and queers here, or them transponders or cross puzzlers!"
Governor Pat McCrory held a news conference in Raleigh this morning to explain his support of the House bill eliminating protection for LBGT residents of his state. "We don't want them homos and queers here in our great state," said McCrory. We don'...
Read full storyRepublican Party Now Classified as an Endangered Species
The International Union for the Conservation of Nature (IUCN) has now added the Republican Party to its "Red List," which is a list of species world-wide ranging from completely extinct to near-threatened. The GOP, or the Grand Obsolescent Party, as...
Read full storyApple Refuses to Share Mind-Reading Software With FBI
In a press release held Thursday morning, FBI investigator Tracey McCall expressed her frustration at Apple's refusal to cooperate with the San Bernardino shooting investigation: "We know that they install mind-reading software in all of their iPh...
Read full storyCanada Prepares For Migrant Influx After US Presidential Election
US politics has become a scorched earth zone with all sides tolerating zero dissent. Underscoring the impassable political divide, a Quinnipiac study shows that fully twenty percent of people living in the US will flee the country after the 2016 Pres...
Read full storyDonald Trump: "I'm Anointing The Motor City Madman as my Sergeant-at-Arms!"
Donald Trump announced yesterday while he was on the campaign trail that he is "Anointing the Motor City Madman as my Sergeant-at-Arms." Ted Nugent, who was unavailable for comment yesterday and early today, may or may not accept the anointing fro...
Read full storyThere's A Reason Grandma Sits That Way...
This leap year afforded the African American community an extra day of Black History Month; let's hope it was enjoyed because it may be the last one America ever has. The election season has been ugly to say the least. Amidst the turmoil of the electorate, politicians have been especially on edge. One contentious issue: black lives. Yes, they matter- but in the eyes of Washington's elite they...
Read full storyFact Checking The 2016 Presidential Campaign Rumors
A TS-Investigation - Keeping The Candidates Honest Q. Does Donald Trump Have Two heads? A. Inconclusive There have been reports of a second head emerging from Donald Trump during a press briefing, as well as a leaked TSA X-Ray image that shows...
Read full storyO.J. Simpson - Have sword will travel
Earlier this morning Med Star filming crew set up props on O.J. Simpson's former estate. They were preparing to film the last three episodes of Forensic Files. Filming was interrupted when the Prop Master found a knife buried under the Director's...
Read full storyHillary Blames Coughing Spasms On Bernie's Popcorn Farts
BILLINGSGATE POST: A mere coincidence. I think not. On "Face the Nation" Sunday, John Dickerson asked Hillary Clinton about the coughing spasm she had in the last debate with Bernie Sanders. Hillary responded by saying, "John, I would rather not t...
Read full storyAfter the Debate...Trump, Cruz, Rubio exchange barbs at urinal
Last night's Republican debate in Detroit was only half the story. Our intrepid Senior Reporter, Dale Petrie has a nose for news, which fortunately for him was plugged, because to get the real dirt, he hid in the restroom at the Fox Theater. Here is...
Read full storyGhost of Ronald Reagan Appears at Republican Debates
Detroit, MI Spectators were startled to see the ghost of Ronald Reagan suddenly appear at the most recent Republican debate in Detroit. When interviewed by journalists, Reagan's Ghost said, "I really had to come back to see if I could get all th...
Read full storyTitty-Titty-Bang-Bang
Having already scraped well beneath the bottom of numerous barrels in an attempt to attract, hold and retain any weekend viewers, BBCTV has seemingly dragged itself into the 21st Century and discovered that sex sells! Still shuddering with orgasmi...
Read full storyUpon Hearing New UN Sanctions, North Korea's Kim Jong Un Talks of Retaliation
Pyongyang, North Korea Rotund North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un issued some new threats to the Western World, in retaliation for the latest round of sanctions on North Korea by the UN. Kim Jong-Un will: *No longer allow his all-girl band to travel outside the country. *No longer let tourists photograph the giant Kim Song-Il statue. *Flood the Internet with penile enlargement spam. *...
Read full storySherrif Joe Arpaio Tied To Pink Panty BDSM Ring
Not that there is anything wrong with that--infamous anti-immigrant and law and order Sheriff, Joe Arpaio, was discovered to be part of a BDSM ring where he was paddled while wearing pink panties. In the ultimate irony, Sheriff Joe, or Sheriff of...
Read full storyAt last, euthanasia arrives in the UK!
The first branch of 'Cark It Right' will open the doors of its brand new, custom built suicide centre on St. Peter's Close on Monday. I spoke to the company M.D. Graham Reaper today. "Hello Graham, exciting time for you?" "Oh yes, we think it's a killer idea; people have been dying for an opportunity like this." "Erm..." "Sorry about the dark humour." "Don't you mean Christmas crack...
Read full storyKim Jong-Un to Host Labor Camp Convention in North Korea
Pyongyang, North Korea Kim Jong-Un, rotund hereditary dictator of North Korea, announced that his country would be hosting a symposium on labor camps, invitation only. It is expected that it will be attended by Russian gulag representatives, a fe...
Read full storyElephants Revolt Against Republicans
Washington, D.C. - A recent survey of over 1000 elephants from zoos across America, confirmed what biologists who study the great, big animals have thought all along - elephants are very aware that they are the face of the Republican Party - and they...
Read full storyJimmy Fallon, Stephen Colbert, Seth Meyers and John Oliver to Quit if Trump Loses
NEW YORK, NY - In a rare act of unanimity, late night television hosts, Jimmy Fallon, Stephen Colbert, Seth Meyers and John Oliver have announced they will step down if Donald Trump does not become the Republican candidate for President of the United...
Read full storyDonald Trump Seeks to Buy the Planet Mercury
Science Town, USA Donald Trump made an announcement today that he wished to purchase the planet Mercury. "I had my people do a title search and it appears that it is not owned by anyone. I therefore claim the right to purchase the planet. I should...
Read full storyTrump Supporters Sucker Punch Barack Obama
Washington, DC As Donald Trump was wrapping up another racist rant, Barack Obama slipped away from his Secret Service agents to go up to the stage to chastise Trump for his racist and sexist stances. All of a sudden, a Trump supporter rushed up an...
Read full storyNew Rio Olympic Sport Added - The Kayak Condom Scoop
Rio De Janeiro, Brazil - The Head of the International Olympic Committee announced on Monday that his hard-working team has figured out an interesting approach to dealing with the disgusting cesspool that laps at Rio's shore, also known by its other...
Read full storyTrump Hurls Crap at Supporters
Milkforce and I snuck into the Trump Rally at Two Forks, Tennessee. We brought Stosh Armstrong with us for protection in case they started throwing punches. Stosh kept a low profile, staying about ten feet behind us in the crowd. It's not that he was...
Read full storyHomeowners must provide pamphlets guiding potential burglars to high value items
In a major victory for a campaign run by The Sunday Telegraph, the Department for Justice will move to bring in a new law protecting criminals who break into people's houses. Ahead of the new law being introduced in the House of Lords this week, C...
Read full story'Trump University taught valuable lessons,' says former student. 'Like Trump is an asshole.'
NEW YORK, Ny - The line of students claiming that the education they received from Trump University was as worthless as the bogus brochures that first enticed them is about as long as a Trump Tower turned on its side. In two sworn depositions take...
Read full storyBoston Celtics Crotch Problem
Marcus Smart of the Celtics has a Crotch Problem. Star basketball player Smart was fined $15,000 for an obscene gesture aimed at the referees. Please, don't shoot with that itchy trigger finger. In a world of endless and myriad ways to convey a...
Read full storyNigeria's oil business is corrupt! Now that is real news!
Nigeria's blessing in disguise, the discovery of black gold on their shores, was meant to propell the whole nation into realms of wealth, jobs, homes, affluence, good health care, and basic prosperity for every Nigerian. This Utopian dream has now tu...
Read full storyTrump Inaugurates "Trump Madrasa" to sign up muslims, then immediately ban them.
Coming off what he describes as a "huge success" in Trump University, Donald Trump held a ribbon cutting ceremony inaugurating his next education venture, "Trump Madrasa," and describes it as "a fabulous initiative" to have muslims self-identify and...
Read full storyKim & Kanye's Love Banned from UK Schools - Rest Of World Could Follow
Lincolnshire, UK - Parents are in a moral panic after a seemingly harmless art class left at least five children with a warped sense of love and relationships. Another two are said to be questioning their sexuality. Many more will need to see the sch...
Read full storyFidel Castro is losing his marbles et cojones!
US Hotel giant Starwood has been allowed to purchase three hotels in the Cuban capital of Havana. As part of the purchase, the hotel chain will renovate the hotels to US standards, meaning plastic breakfasts, plastic cutlery, rubber waffles and plent...
Read full storySharapova Drugs Scandal: Hotel Carpet Hits Back After Slur
The assembled press came to see one loser as Maria Sharapova admitted taking the recently banned substance Meldonium. But there was another one on show: an innocent carpet, left bruised and with its shag swept against the natural lay. As she offer...
Read full storyMan Writes Story To Alleviate Boredom
A Englishman man living in the Thai capital of Bangkok has revealed how he wrote and published a story on satirical news website TheSpoof.com simply to try to make himself feel better, 'cheer himself up', and to alleviate symptoms of 'pure and unadu...
Read full storyTrump Will Make the Space Shuttle Air Force One
New York, NY Donald Trump announced some of the changes he will make when he becomes President of the United States. "For starters, I will be replacing Air Force One. My own plane is much nicer so I think the only comparable thing the government h...
Read full storyZika Tourism: The Hopeful Side of a Plague
Gibsonton Fl: There is a well known but little discussed community of unemployed, self proclaimed "freaks" who've eked out a parcel of land in Gibsonton Florida. Men with scales, women with beards, "children" born during the Carter administration sta...
Read full storyBernie Sanders Unveils Plan to have the United States Invade Socialist Nations
Today, in a local debate against democratic candidate Hillary Clinton, Sanders delivered his plan to have the US break off from the United Nations, and to put 100% of Military funding into invading Cuba, Scandinavia, and China. "We need to conquer th...
Read full story2016 Presidential Bumper Stickers For The Rest Of Us.
PLEASE - JUST HOLD THE ELECTION NOW AND GET IT OVER WITH! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE! - Did anyone else notice that we ultimately are allowed only two choices? - I turned on the TV and thought it was a beauty pageant until I saw Bernie. - Do I really have to wait until after November before I get my regular TV programming back? - Personally, I want Angela Merkel to run. - Donald...
Read full storyDonald Trump: "White sizses matter!"
At a rally in Fayetteville, North Carolina yesterday presidential candidate Donald Trump said to a enthusiastic crowd, "You better believe it, white size matters! Just ask Micro Marco!" The crowd roared its approval. "You know they say, it's not t...
Read full storyMotorway signs are all lies
The warning signs seen across British motorways are written entirely by compulsive liars, it has emerged. Signs such as "Queue Ahead" and "Obstruction in carriageway" simply aren't true. A spokesperson for the British Highways has admitted "We...
Read full storyDear Vlad
Dear Vlad, Thank you very much for your letter. I wish my Russian was as good as your English! You're doing a terrific job over there, making Russia huge again. A piece of Ukraine here, a piece there. By the way, nice job in Syria! Thanks also for the advice, and let me return the favor. There's no reason why you should let sanctions and low oil prices deflate your country's economy. I...
Read full storyPrince Philip Asks Prince Harry to Become New Prince Consort
London, UK In a story leaked by a reliable source, it is reported that Prince Philip is unable to keep up with the Queen and he knows that, since the Queen is even stronger than her mother was, she will probably remain at work for at least another 20...
Read full storyNorth East to observe a minute's silence for victim family suffering austerity who had to cancel Sky subscription
A one minute silence across the North East will be held tomorrow in observation of the loss of a family from Teesside who had to cut their Sky TV subscription due to austerity. As a result, Dan Matthews of Middlesbrough will no longer be able to f...
Read full storyRepublican Candidates for President Pressured to Release Their Anatomical Endowments
Detroit, MI--After Donald Trump revealed at the Republican debate that he was "huge," in response to Marco Rubio's implicit criticism of the size of his genitals, all of the candidates now vying for the Republican nomination are being asked to releas...
Read full storyHull Man Refuses To Write Donald Trump Story
A writer on satirical news website TheSpoof.com has refused to buckle to media pressure and write an inane and pointless story about American businessman, politician, television personality, and candidate for the Republican nomination for President o...
Read full storyThe Little Black Book of Diplomacy
A whistleblower from MI6 using the pseudonym of "Mull of Kintyre" has published on the web a document that has the government reeling. It is a memo that is written by the Home Office for use by ambassadors, politicians, spies and other functionar...
Read full storyTrump calls in National Rifle Association
Republican front-runner, Donald Trump, has revealed further plans relating to defense since announcing his intention to curb American commitment to the North Atlantic Treaty Organization. "NATO is just too expensive. If they want us, they can coug...
Read full storyScamatology to Merge With North Korea
Clearlyclinical, FL North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un and Scamatology dictator David Makemerich (through a Scamatology spokeperson Karing Sow) made a joint announcement today when they confirmed the rumors that Scamatology will merge with North Korea...
Read full storyOrange shirt "Trump Troopers" replace Secret Service as Trump security detail!
The press corps following Donald Trump was shocked this morning as Trump left his hotel in Fayetteville, North Carolina. He was accompanied by a group of twelve men wearing orange shirts with black arm bands that read TRUMP TROOPERS! A small bolt...
Read full storyUS Citizens Embarassed By Donald Trump Pose As Canadians When Abroad
Fueling a spike in sales of all things Canadian, Americans going overseas are depleting store stocks, especially of sports gear, in the US and abroad. While visiting France, Brendy Wells and her boyfriend Scott Winter were soon tired of explainin...
Read full storyList of white nationalist organizations submitted to Trump for disavowal; Trump accepts all endorsements
Washington, D.C. - Holding Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump to his word, a list of white nationalist organizations was submitted Tuesday to Mr. Trump. During an interview with CNN on Sunday, Mr. Trump, who was unclear what an endorsemen...
Read full storyThe Emperor's New Academy
"Boo-hoo", screamed the tantrum-prone emperor at his education secretary. "I want a new school that no other emperors have, even if there is no empirical evidence that it works. "Of course your majesticness", the emperor's education secretary grovell...
Read full storyBill Cosby is Only Attendee at The Cosby Show Reunion
Los Angeles, CA Bill Cosby was chagrined to find himself the only attendee at the latest Cosby Show reunion. "I don't know why they aren't here! And I ordered and paid for prime rib dinners for everyone! It's really strange, since three years ago,...
Read full storyLeicester City Now Most Popular Team In Thailand
Leicester City, the team who spent almost the whole of the 2014/15 season battling against relegation from the Premier League, and who have taken the country by storm this time around, are on the verge of something spectacular. The Foxes are abou...
Read full storyNFL Owner Gives Headaches, Not Aspirin
The risk of taking a baby aspirin is as dangerous as owning an NFL franchise. Scientists ought to spend billions to learn what owner Jim Irsay of the Indy Colts already knows. Yes, it appears that being a member of the billionaire bozo club is not...
Read full storyTrump shocks poetry world
For National Poetry Month, Walt Whitman's recent return from the dead for his reading of "Song of Myself" was overshadowed by the shocking arrival of Donald Trump, who said that he had not heard of Whitman, but was intrigued by the title, which he thought was "Shlong of Myself," and by prospects for spontaneous "call and response." However, sources confirm that his outbursts merely echoed phrases...
Read full storyDiscount airliner Ghost Airlines reaping huge profits from anti-perk services
Coral Springs, FL - People are always looking for ways to set themselves apart from the crowd. Who the hell would have thought that putting sugar back into formerly sugar-sweetened beverages would be so popular? Well they are and some experts say...
Read full storyCruz Bimbo Report By Wile E Coyote
BILLINGSGATE POST: The five bimbos the National Enquirer claim had carnal knowledge with Ted Cruz have one thing in common; None of them have names at this time. That is just as well. Experience has taught this reporter that the slower a story unfo...
Read full storyTrump Receives Award From The Letter
At a press conference in Snohomish, WA, the self-described "alphabet capital of the world," the letter I (pronounced "eye") announced that presidential candidate Donald Trump would receive the 2015-2016 award for most use of an important letter as a...
Read full storyдорогая Donald
My friend, I very happy you doing so well running for president of United States. I very confident you winning in November. Then we can unite our two countries and make strides to domin . . . to lead free world. But first, I must give advice. Is good advice, from my own experience in becoming president, premier and president of Russia. Is good you throw protestors out of rallies, but better...
Read full storyTrump Supporters Ponder Which Guns To Take To RNC
Now that tens of thousands of gun enthusiasts have pressured the Republican National Convention to allow guns, the real question is which of their guns they should bring. Participants will be limited to no more than one rifle or two pistols each t...
Read full storyDebate: Rubio exposes himself! Trump suspends campaign!
The media is calling it the most disgusting debate in the history of US political campaigns! Last night at the GOP debate, the 2016 campaign for Pre3sident of the United States reached a new low in this year of rude, crude and unattractive democra...
Read full storyScamatology Head David Makemerich Asked to Star in Movie Blockbuster About Him
Clearlydelusional, FL In startling movie news, Scamatology Head Cheese has purchased a large movie studio in the El Lay area to twin up with the other movie studio he bought a few years ago. The first movie announced by the new studio will be a b...
Read full storyThy sins forgiven - go forth and urinate
Mayor Bill de Blasio and NYPD announced that consumption of alcohol, urinating in public or littering will henceforth be considered as minor offenses. People will no longer be shackled at their ankles or handcuffed to a fire hydrant. The only gro...
Read full storyAfter Hillary's Emails, Hunt For Who Outed CIA Agent
After the investigation into Hillary Clinton's emails has been exhausted, the same investigative team will turn their attention to who in government, (during the Bush administration) gave the green light to make public the name of CIA undercover agen...
Read full storyThe Apprentice, Part Deux
[It's November 18, 2016. An announcer off stage yells out: "Ladies and Gentlemen! The President-elect of the United States - Donald Trump!" Trump walks on stage as an orchestra plays "Hail To The Chief."] "Thanks everyone, and thanks to all of you who voted for me last week. As for the rest of you, all I can say is, you're not welcome here any more, and maybe you should think about moving...
Read full storyBudget for women and the disabled
George Osborne introduced a Budget aimed to assist women and the disabled in a move that stimulated immediate approval from the 'Daily Male'. Disabled people will be given the chance to return to the workforce so that they can maintain an income t...
Read full storySleep Deprived Attorney Incriminates Client During Pretrial Hearing
K.C.,MO: The 1998 cold case murder of 17 year old Martin Keif seemed to be on it's way to a resolution until a well respected defense attorney brought everything to a screeching halt. Jared O'Connell Esq. (aka Mr. Not Guilty) is one of the most f...
Read full storyOrange Shirt Trump Troopers expand to fiifty states, start citizen arrests!
The Donald Trump campaign confirmed in a written statement this morning that the Orange Shirt Trump Troopers have been organized in all of the fifty states. According to the statement, plans are also in the works to open private prisons in most state...
Read full storyBatman Unanimously Named Republican Presidential Candidate
By wild acclamation, Republicans have elected Batman to run as the party's presidential nominee. Donald Trump, claiming that he owns Gotham City, railed against the convention's decision. "I bet Batman's dick is just, full-throttle, 2 inches lon...
Read full storyGovernment to introduce 'flab' tax
Slim as a bin-liner Chancellor of the Exchequer, George Osborne, is targeting people's appearance as a major parameter for budget strategy. The increase in tax on sugary soft drinks is merely the tip of the iceberg for Cameron's financial darling.
Read full story"Waller" Movement Wants To Build A Wall Around Trump
They call themselves Wallarous, it rhymes with kangaroos, and it's short for Wall Around Trump. They are supporters of the growing worldwide Waller movement that seeks to rein in Donald Trump's presidential ambitions by building a wall around the blo...
Read full storyCries to "Show the Dome" pour in as Trump's Honesty called into question.
As lie after lie is piled on by current leading Republican Presidential nominee, Donald Trump, most reasonable people have called into question his self proclaimed virtue of "telling it like it is." "I tell it like it is, and that is why everybody...
Read full storySpice Girls to Reform for Adult Nappy Commercial
London, England The Spice Girls announced yet ANOTHER reunion of the band. This time, the reason is purely economic, as were the last eight reunions. The prematurely old Girl Power band are clearly not "girls" anymore. Years of hard living and par...
Read full storyLouis van Gaal to rule the Universe?
Louis van Gaal has set his sights on The European SuperLeague Copa America Asian Cup after their 1-0 victory over minnows Manchester City today. In a statement leaked to Sneaky Snoops, he said "we've just beaten a very crap team, who were challen...
Read full storyTrump Analyzes Foreign Policy in Exclusive Report
Donald Trump gave his views on foreign policy to this magazine. We think you will find his views to be quite insightful. On Russian leader Vladimir Putin: "Putin thinks he's a big he-man, has a nice physique, likes to pose without his shirt on, he works out, rides horses, etc. What I would do would be to challenge Putin to a one-on-one, man to man boxing match, with the winner to decide the...
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