Written by K.C. Bell

Monday, 21 March 2016

image for After Hillary's Emails, Hunt For Who Outed CIA Agent

After the investigation into Hillary Clinton's emails has been exhausted, the same investigative team will turn their attention to who in government, (during the Bush administration) gave the green light to make public the name of CIA undercover agent Valerie Plame.

While Hillary's emails are very important, to a few in government…

EMAIL: Don't forget to pick up some milk and cat food.

…the life of Valerie Plame and the lives of people in her network throughout the world were compromised by making Ms. Plame's name public. Compromised is a sanitized word for the possibility of being targeted, captured, tortured, assassinated or murdered. Even in death, the names of CIA agents remain secret. They are silently memorialized with a star carved into marble at the CIA Memorial Wall. Stars, but no names.

EMAIL: And we're out of potatoes, carrots and dishwasher soap. We might take out Muammar Gaddafi if he invades Benghazi. And don't forget to buy some bananas. I'm getting cramps in my legs. No brown spots, please.

So, it is with great anticipation that the person who outed Ms. Plame will at last also be outed, arrested and brought to justice. And it just might have something to do with yellowcake. That wasn't an email to pick up a yellowcake. Yellowcake uranium is an ingredient used to produce WMD. Yellowcake wasn't sold to Saddam Hussein.

EMAIL: Huh? Yellowcake wasn't sold to Iraq's Saddam Hussein?

EMAIL REPLY: Nah! He never had WMD. Without WMD, there couldn't be an invasion of Iraq! Halliburton would have been so disappointed.

EMAIL: Wasn't Dick Cheney president of Halliburton before becoming Bush's vice president?

EMAIL REPLY: Yes, and the messenger who revealed that Saddam Hussein didn't have yellowcake was Ms. Plame's husband, former Ambassador Joseph Wilson.

EMAIL: The batter thickens.

EMAIL REPLY: Delete all of the above emails.

EMAIL: Can't. They stay in the hard drive like forever. Ask Hillary.

EMAIL REPLY: Take out that hard drive and hammer it to death. Make an urn out of it. Entomb or cremate it. Bury it in Forest Lawn. Forward it to Hillary's computer.

EMAIL: Done.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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