There were 1,284 spoof news stories published in October 2008. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Georgina 'Satanic Sluts' Baillie on her high whorse about shagging Russell Brand
London - (Ross/Russ Mess): The foxy siren at the center of the Jonathan Ross/Russell Brand lurid phone call fiasco lashed out today at tabloid reports she had 'dared' her ex-shag to phone her Grandpa about shenanigans in the back seat of her 1999 La...
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Iceland Bankrupt
Alistair Darling today revealed that the whole of Iceland has gone bankrupt following the collapse of the only Icelandic Bank, Landsbankinn. Thousands of people have been left without jobs as the credit crunch hit Iceland, and many more have been...
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Dolly Parton says Miley Cyrus' Tits are too small
Country music legend Dolly Parton has told teenage superstar Miley Cyrus that her tits are too small and that she'll need to work on making them bigger. Parton was of course referring to Cyrus' avian titties and the small size of the chicks compar...
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Jamie Lynn Spears Pregnant Again, Expecting Second Child Three Months After Birth of First
Teen mother and actress Jamie Lynn Spears is once again pregnant, just three months after the birth of her first baby. The 17 year old left her cable television series, and will apparently not be going back any time soon. When asked to verify her...
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Sarah Palin sex tape shows she dressed up as Tina Fey for Halloween
New York, New York - It is well known that Sarah Palin dressed up as Tina Fey for Halloween but until the release of the Palin sex tape on the Internet, no one knew that she would often would remain in character back home in the bedroom where she wou...
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Grace arrested over Caylee Anthony kidnapping
FBI raided the offices of the Nancy Grace show yesterday and placed Headline News Cable TV's Nancy Grace in handcuffs. Grace was arrested regarding the kidnapping Caylee Anthony. That same evening Nancy Grace's home was also raided and her twins...
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Miley Cyrus reveals she likes to shower naked
Raunchy 'Hannah Montana' star Miley Cyrus has told an insider that she likes to shower completely naked. The sultry singer/actress has said she likes nothing more than feeling warm water flowing across her body while she stands beneath a hose. Som...
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A Millwall Brick: How To Make One
When I talk to people about football, and the 'old days', the conversation invariably comes around to violence, or perceived violence, because, a lot of the time, it just never happened. Lots of running around, posturing, arm-waving and shouting, yes...
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Jamie Lynn Spears and Miley Cyrus have joint orgasm while sitting on a washing machine
One of teen-lands most popular stars and the sex-craving talent less little sister of Britney Spears shared a special moment whilst doing the laundry yesterday. Jamie Lynn Spears brought her dirty knickers over for the weekly wash at gal-pal Mile...
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Miley Cyrus seeks Tits advice from friend Dolly Parton
Miley Cyrus has been visiting country legend Dolly Parton's house to get advice on making her tits more comfortable. Miley - an avid breeder of birds, mostly tits - inherited an aviary from her great-great grandmother's estate and has spent all he...
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Direct TV Poltergeist Commercial Draws Complaints From Public
"They're here!" That's right, they are here. People complaining about the use of a scene from the 1982 movie Poltergeist in a Direct TV commercial. The scene features the late Heather O'Rourke sitting in front of a television set in her parent...
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Hannah Montana star Miley Cyrus says Vanity Fair pic was 'one dumb decision,' has now posed for Sports Illustrated with Sarah Palin
HOLLYWOOD (FMLiveWire) -- Miley Cyrus, the star of the Disney television series Hannah Montana, has admitted that posing nude for a Vanity Fair photoshoot was "one honestly dumb decision." The 15-year-old actress and singer found herself embroile...
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Nancy Grace Changes Hairstyles
On day 120 of her continuous search for the truth in the Caylee Anthony disappearance case, Nancy Grace has agreed to change her hair. Incapable of changing anything else on her questionably popular but sensationally scripted news broadcast, Ms...
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Obama Orders New Presidential Limo: See It On TV's "Pimp my Ride!"
Zastava, Yugoslavia/Daily Worker Saying he is a "Man of the People", President by Acclimation Barack Hussein Obama , announced today he has commissioned a new Presidential Limousine to replace the gas guzzling, ostentatious ride of former US leaders...
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Sol Campbell In Call For 'More Gay Footballers'
Sol Campbell, the Portsmouth defender, has said in a statement that there are far too few gay footballers, and has called upon players to support the under-represented minority by 'becoming gay'. Sol, real name Sulzeer Jeremiah, who, some claim, i...
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Miley Cyrus dumps on Zak Efron's cock while he's away camping
Pop-tart Miley Cyrus couldn't resist the urge to empty her bowels onto the head of High School Musical 'hotty' Zac Efron's pet cockerel while minding his house for the weekend. Efron was away on a camping trip with some muscular, tanned male 'budd...
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Jonathan Ross Sacked Over Bestiality Allegations
BBC film cwitic, Jonathan Ross, has been sacked after he was arrested by police on charges of Bestiality. Ross was appearing as a guest on the Russell Brand BBC Radio 2 show on October 18, when the host telephoned ex-Fawlty Towers actor Andrew Sac...
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"Top Gear" Show Causes More Controversy!
Producers have strongly denied that the latest feature to appear on the popular motoring show "Top Gear" will be harmful to the environment. Previous features on the programme have included a dog vs car race across the unblemished and pure wastes...
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Naked Miley Cyrus used as easy points-earner by spoof writer
A trend has grown amongst a group of desperate (in every sense of the word) spoof writers in which the nudity of young Hollywood starlet Miley Cyrus is used for gaining fame and fortune. Sentences like "naked nympho Miley Cyrus" and "busty teen ba...
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Jonas Brothers Unlucky In Love
Now while the alleged romance between Nick Jonas and Selena Gomez is yet to be revealed, an insider has reported that they're already on the rocks. "Nick and Selena are constantly fighting these days. With Nick touring all the time they barely have t...
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Demi's Trainwreck with Meaning Behind Lyrics Revealed
Demi Lovato, sixteen, has had a hard time fending off the press lately when now ex-best friend Selena Gomez spilled the beans on the meaning behind the song Trainwreck, a song written by Demi which was released on her debut album, Don't Forget. S...
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Georgina 'Satanic Sluts' Baillie To Take Over Russell Brand Radio 2 Show
Georgina Baillie, the 23-year-old granddaughter of Andrew Sachs, at the centre of the BBC prank calls row, has said she was "horrified and disgusted" by Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand's behaviour, just before it was announced by BBC bosses that she...
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Miley Cyrus has gay thoughts
Pop princess Miley Cyrus has told a magazine that she has had "gay thoughts" in the past. The Hannah Montana star was speaking to respected Gay magazine 'Gloryhole' about live, love and gay stuff. In the interview she says: "The other day wh...
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BBC Sachs Russell Brand & Jonathan Ross
London, England - The BBC has sacked top-paid presenters Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross following overwhelming public complaints against the pair for recent on-air inappropriate behaviour. Pranksters Brand and Ross had made controversial on-air p...
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Man With World's Longest Finger Dead in Bizarre Fairground Accident
The man with the longest finger in the world, Mr Brian Spindle, is reported to have been killed in a bizarre fairground accident earlier today. Mr Spindle, from Leek in Staffordshire, was reported to have suffered a fatal injury whilst riding the...
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Cindy McCain To Pose Nude
CASA GRANDE, Arizona - Several months ago Cindy McCain received a call from Hugh Hefner telling her that he was going to be putting out a brand new men's magazine. He told her that it would be just like his original magazine, with the exception that...
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Paris Hilten Shows Her Pussy Flaps to US Presidential Candidates!
As a part of her 'fake' presidential campaign, Paris Hilten showed of her Pussy Flaps to the real presidential candidates earlier today in a media frenzy that has bored the world. Hilten, best known for going out, getting pissed and generally fuck...
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Famous astrologer forsees Charles-Camilla scenario for Prince William-Kate Middleton. Secret Boleyn curse dooms their chances for wedded bliss!
With speculation rife that Prince William and Kate Middleton are about to split, Royal-watchers are in a downright tizzy. After six years of dating based on an "understanding", Kate was horrified to learn that Wills has decided to put his RAF career...
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Emma Watson does all she can to get a Dick inside
The actress Emma Watson, frustrated by red tape, has done all she feels she can to help get a Dick inside. The diminutive young actress is almost at her wits end having run out of options to help her new escort Dick Doubtfire obtain a flat within...
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Sarah Palin Vaginal Discharge Video Clip Clocks Up 1 Million Hits On YouTube
Republican VP candidate Sarah Palin is at the centre of US political news again, after a graphic video clip of her mopping up some vaginal discharge reached more than 1 million hits within two days of being posted on YouTube. The Alaska governor h...
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Michelle Bachman Says She Meant to Call Obama a Terrorist Not Anti-American
Today Congressman Michelle Bachman, Republican from the Sixth District in Minnesota said that during her appearance on "Hardball" her comments were taken out of context, and that "Political pundits from the Socialist Right who used my exact quotes un...
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Garth Crooks Sacked From Match Of The Day
Garth Crooks : Hello Is that Johnny?, It's Garth here, Calling from London, I'll get straight to the point, I have been sacked as a Pundit by the BBC, let's face it the Match of the Day Boys all hate me, I think I have a good case for Wrongful Dismissal it could be racially motivated, but we don't have any "Showbiz" Black Lawyers in England, are you interested?". Johnny Cochrane : "Let me get t...
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Shocking News - Japanese Don't Like Foreigners
Tokyo, Japan - "Don't come to Japan if you're a foreigner." That's the message from many Japanese hotels in a recent survey conducted by the Japanese Ministry for Tourism. "We don't have Gaijin (Japanese word for foreigner) and we don't want them...
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Russell Brand 'shagged all five of Andrew Sachs' granddaughters'
London - (Sassy Ass Mess): Hampstead residents reckon their lothario comedian neighbor Russell Brand 'shagged all five of Andrew Sachs' granddaughters' and not just the eldest, burlesque glamor-dancer Georgina 'Satanic Sluts' Baillie. Brand, 33,...
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Katie Price Has One Tit Bigger Than The Other
Katie Price, aka 'Jordan', has startled her fans and millions of 'laptop wankers', by emerging from her latest round of plastic surgery in Los Angeles with one tit bigger than the other. Price, who is married to that Peter Andre, had the tit-enlar...
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The 2008 Canadian Lingerie Football League
World Wide Wonderfully Wondrous Sports Magazine recently sent one of its senior writers, Rhubarb 'Seventh-Inning Stretch' Stretchalini to Saskatoon, Saskatchewan to interview Pierre Thibodaux Lafayette, the commissioner of the brand new all-womens fo...
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Keanu Reeves To Star In New Superman Film
Looking to hopefully break the Superman jinx, Keanu Reeves has accepted the title role of Superman in a new film expected to be released in June 2005. "Keanu is the perfect actor for the role. His work in The Matrix was second to none and he will be...
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Obama, Well Hung According To Wife Michelle, While She Be'littles' McCain
Larry Flynt Daily Sex Report - The hot item today is a bombshell of off-campaign remarks made by Michelle Obama. Appearing on the Spokane, Washington radio talk show show, 'Top U.S. Hos Talk About Their Studs,' the obviously-inebriated Ms. Obama...
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Federer: "Nadal is shit and he smells"
In his own words, Roger Federer, today revealed his true feelings and his bitter resentment towards Rafael Nadal, his biggest rival. On speaking about Rafeal Nadal, the world number one, Roger said the following regarding his feelings on being nu...
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Double Entendres List "Getting Bigger"
Researchers at the Oxford English Dictionary have revealed that the list of phrases classed as Double Entendres is getting bigger. "Last year's list was big," said Richard Small, research co-ordinator at the OED. "But compared to this year's, it w...
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Blossom Goodchild predicts Obama landslide!
USA - (Psychic Ass Mess): American celeb psychic Blossom Goodchild has upped the ante of her alien UFO predictions and stated that Barack Obama will 'win a landslide' election victory. Goodchild, 69, has said that 'aliens come in love' and famousl...
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Lizzie Maguire star Hilary Duff changes her name to Miley Cyrus to get media attention
Hilary Duff, the former star of children's television show Lizzie Maguire, has changed her name to Miley Cyrus in a desperate attempt to reclaim her 'teen-queen' crown. The singer/actress/toy brand has struggled to compete with her singing-acting-...
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Pentagon's 'synthetic telepathy' technology siphoned off from retro-engineered UFO
Washington AC/DC - (X-Files Mess): Pentagon scientists have siphoned off synthetic telepathy technology from a retro-engineered mothercraft that was once stored in the top security Roswell hangar known as Area 51. The move marks a radical departur...
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"Russell Brand is talentless, diseased 'scum' says filthy whore"
The unfunny, overpaid, walking piece of frozen urine Russell Brand has been 'branded a giant petri dish' by a drunken street-walker. 'He gave me gonorrhea says doxy' Commom 'harlot' Sharon Macall stated "While I have never met the repulsively...
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My Gay Affair with Obama
London, England - Retired Royal Air Force pilot and pre-op transsexual Polly Graff has revealed that she had a one-night stand with US Presidential hopeful Barack Obama when she was a gay man. According to Ms Graff, the tryst occurred a dozen years a...
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Teen Queen, Brenda Song, and Jonas Brother, Joe Jonas, Hate Each Other!
Tween-dream sensations Brenda Song and her rumored boyfriend Joe Jonas, are currently fighting in the latest feud (the first being Miley VS Selena, the second is the new Demi VS Debby). A couple of rumors surfaced the internet this year stating t...
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X Factor Cheryl Cole To Quit Show After Husband's Wembley Booing
Cheryl Cole, the X Factor judge, has said she is considering leaving the show as a protest against the booing and barracking her husband, footballer Ashley Cole, received at the hands of 'so called' England fans. Mr Cole was jeered endlessly by 's...
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Enema Craze could sweep the Nation
Hollywood, California, an apparent new craze, that appears to have originated in fraternity hazing rituals and propagated by Hollywood 'cool' people has gripped the nation. Enema parties, that involve group enemas and mass bowel expulsions are curre...
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Raw Sewage Threat to Booming Dubai
The once-pristine tropical beaches bordering the prestigious Dubai Yacht Club and neighbouring prime tourist hang-outs have recently become swamped in raw sewage. The putrid problem is caused by the illegal dumping of untre...
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Britney Spears Poses for Madame Tussot's Wax Museum
Britney Spears has finally agreed to sign a contract for the formal pose and measurement process to enter the famous wax museum exhibit. Madame Tussot museum curator, Hans Sticken discussed the process with "E" Entertainment News over the week...
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Man Dies After Wank in Bath
A 42 year old man from Dudley in the West Midlands died earlier today after having a wank whilst in the bath. After his bath he popped down to his local newsagents and was instantly killed as he stepped out in the path of a lorry whilst attempting...
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Stereophonics front-man Kelly Jones confesses to picking up man in nightclub high jinks shame
Kelly Jones, lead singer and top hair stylist with the Tom Jones international tribute band, the Stereophonics has admitted to picking up men in sordid and seedy nightclubs, often very late at night at times when he really should be tucked up in bed...
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Arsenal Captain William Gallas Leaves Nightclub With Fag
Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger has reportedly summoned his team captain William Gallas to a private meeting, livid that the player has been snapped by photographers at an exclusive London nightclub, with a fag in his mouth. The moody Gallas, 31, ha...
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Senator Joe Biden admits to Tourette Syndrome-like disease
Perhaps to lower expectations about his performance during the upcoming October 2 debate with Sarah Palin, Senator Biden today seemed to admit to some kind of speech disability. "The world knows I have a brain sensor problem. It's a disability l...
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Sperm Bank Deposits Dry Up Overnight
Financial sectors received another blow today when the world's two largest and most respected sperm banks separately announced that they were in a sticky situation. The Nobel Sperm Bank in Oslo and the Jade Pagoda and Two Golden Drums Sperm Bank in C...
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Sarah Palin forced to sell her high-priced Panties on eBay; debriefed proceeds not going to charity
Washington, D.C. - In an attempt to calm the waters over the controversy of the RNC purchasing $150,000 worth of clothing for vice-presidential nominee, Sarah Palin, the McCain campaign has announced today that it is putting up Palin's underwear for...
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Camilla's nude pix go missing - were to have been part of 60 gifts for Prince Charles' birthday
LONDON: Camilla Parker-Bowles -AKA - the Duchess of Cornwall's plans to surprise her husband with 60 different gifts on his 60th birthday came a cropper when it was discovered that a book containing nude pictures of the Duchess has gone AWOL. The...
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Topless Risqué Photos of Barack Obama's Paternal Grandmother Surface
Kenya, Africa - Last week reported photos of Barack Obama's mother, Stanley Anne Dunham, completely nude surfaced on the internet causing many to speculate if there were any more scandalous photos of Barack Obama's family members in provocative poses...
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Man with large Penis buys Porsche
The marketing division of Porsche international has been thrown into disarray after it was revealed last week that a 944 Carrera was purchased from a German dealership by a man with a large penis. Suspicions that the Porsche's marketing strategy...
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Daylight Savings Time - Big Changes Announced This Year
Baltimore, Maryland (IPP) - The U.S. Naval observatory has announced big changes to this year's Daylight Savings Time Change on November 2, 2008. The hour from 11:00 PM until 12:00 AM is being totally eliminated. Dr. Povenmire Finootch held a pres...
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Paris Hilton to run for President (of Albania)
In what some have described as a shrewd professional move, Paris Hilton announced today that she is seeking nomination for the candidacy of the Albanian Presidency. Despite her own unsuccessful tilt at the American presidency, Paris is now boldly...
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Gisele Bundchen dating Leo DiCaprio's best bud Lukas Haas!
Supermodel Gisele Bundchen has teamed up with her ex-boyfriend Leonardo DiCaprio's best friends to shoot a new music video. Entourage cutie Kevin Connolly directed the beauty in a video for blackcowboy's new song "Come On" late last week on the stre...
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Asteroid 2008 TC3 Appears on Time Over Africa
Sudan, Africa (IPP) - A bright fireball appeared over Africa just as predicted at 10:46 EDT or 0246 UT. The asteroid is designated as 2008 TC3 or 8TA9D69 by the International Astronomical Union (IAU). Dr. Povenmire Finootch, President for life...
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The Fox Network Presents: "The Wasilla Hillbillies"
QUEENS, New York - The Fox Network has approached John McCain and Sarah Palin about staring in a semi-reality quasi-situation comedy show named "The Wasilla Hillbillies." Genghis W. Frisbee a high-ranking Fox Network executive stated that since e...
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Miley Cyrus changes her mind and now admits she doesn't shower naked
Tween sensation Miley Cyrus has made a u-turn on a previous statement she made about showering naked. The stupid twat now admits that she showers fully clothed in a dark, windowless dungeon using spit and a scrubbing brush to remove her thick make...
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Olympic Doping Scandal Jolts Fans
Lausanne, Switzerland - A committee of officials have dramatically taken away all 100 medals awarded to Chinese athletes at the Beijing Olympics following drug retesting. Committee chairman, Stan Ozolol, defended the controversial decision at a recen...
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Clothing Manufacturers Seeking Commercial Spokesman Compete For Man With World's Largest Penis
Levi Strauss and Wrangler dominate the denim blue jeans market. They are now competing to hire a new commercial spokesman; Bargis Tryhol, famous as "the man with the world's largest penis," is the object of the marketing war. When asked how he fe...
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Alien Contact A Result Of Blackpool Man's Penis
A Blackpool man who has the world's smallest penis, is in the spotlight this week, as scientists prepare for what they believe will be the first organised contact with aliens from another solar system. Art Hurpint, 43, the owner of the tiny append...
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David Tennant loses his rag
David Tennant, star of the vaguely known sci-fi show 'Doctor Who', lost his temper yesterday. The actor, 37, who was in a cafe at the time, stunned people nearby as he leapt to his feet, took a sonic screwdriver out of his pocket with a flourish...
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Woman, 89, Busted for Keeping Kids' Balls
Blue Tick, Ohio - An 89 year old Ohio woman faces charges of petit theft and grievous bodily harm after being arrested for keeping neighbourhood children's balls. Edna Gonads was taken into custody by Blue Tick sheriff's deputy, Barney Fife, over...
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Mr Drummond from 'Diff'rent Strokes' arrested for 'stroking' kids
Fictional TV "dad" Mr Drummond from Diff'rent Strokes was arrested last night for, 'stroking' kids, in all sorts of different and unsavoury ways. Mr 'D' is fictional dad to Kimberly, Willis and 5 inch funny boy 'Arnold'. A lawyer acting on beha...
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Iceland auctioned off on eBay to highest bidder
Reykjavik, Iceland - The Icelandic parliament met this week in the capital of Reykjavik to discuss their financial predicament. The Icelandic Prime Minister, Geir Haarde, has gone over several options to fix the financial crises in Iceland. One op...
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Sarah Palin Kidnapped Prior to Vice-Presidential Debate
According to anonymous Republican moderates, Sarah Palin, the GOP Vice-Presidential candidate, was temporarily kidnapped just before her debate with Democrat Joe Biden this past Thursday. These multiple sources state that certain far-right die-h...
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Las Vegas Strippers, Hookers and Mobsters Losing Money in Recession
LAS VEGAS (FMLiveWire) -- Sandy Smegaloff who spends her evenings stripping, lap-dancing and hooking at Frick's Cabaret here says she's making only a fraction of her income of a year ago. ''You don't shop, you don't buy stuff you can't afford now,...
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Russell Brand A F*cking Wanker, Says Andrew Sachs
Andrew Sachs, the actor who so brilliantly portrayed Spanish waiter, Manuel, in Fawlty Towers, has reacted angrily to a prank telephone call Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross made to him on 18 October during Brand's radio show. Sachs was unavailabl...
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Morrissey Arrested In Possession Of A Millwall Brick
There was real controversy after the League One game between Millwall and Leeds United at the New Den this afternoon, when ex-Smiths frontman, Steven Morrissey was arrested by police officers in Los Angeles for carrying a Millwall Brick. Morrissey...
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Pizza Hut Changes Name to Pasta Trough
Pizza Hut is rebranding itself as Pasta Trough in a radical overhaul of its corporate image and menu offerings. Logos have been replaced at corporate headquarters in Dallas and new signs are being installed at the chain's outlets worldwide. Asked...
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Miley Cyrus Really Billy Ray's Ex-Wife
Investigative reporters have uncovered birth certificate and other legal documents proving the young Disney phenom to be the ex-wife of former country music star Billy Ray Cyrus, and not his daughter. Miley, now 26, had been hiding her age in o...
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Boogergate: Palin Picks Nose In Nursery School
[Below is a transcript of the latest broadcast from BCD news] Charley: A bombshell revelation is roilng the 08 presidential campaign today. Apparently reaearchers at the Washington Post have uncovered evidence that republican VP nominee Sarah Palin was observed back in nursery school, picking her nose during afternoon naptime. For more on this bombshell we go now to our man in the field Rick...
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Man Buys Sofa for Full Price, Retail Downturn in Tailspin
Consumer confidence has hit an all time low in Britain with the announcement from home furnishings giant DFS that a man bought a sofa for full price over the weekend. Corporate spokesperson Polly Urethane broke the bleak news in an interview with...
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Manchester City And Manchester United To Be Included On Monopoly Board
Manchester City, the world's richest football club, and their city rivals, Manchester United, are to be included in the latest edition of the popular financial property game for players of all ages, Monopoly. It's the first time that clubs have be...
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Johnny Depp Takes on Role in Pirates of Somalia
United Nations, New York - The UN Security Council today took the unprecedented step of appointing Johnny Depp to lead the fight against the growing threat of pirates off the African coast. With maritime pirate attacks increasing worldwide at an alar...
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Jade Goody has media website closed down
Reality TV Queen Jade Goody has put up with much personal abuse over the years but has always endured it with good grace. However, her patience finally ran out today with a court order cutting the media bully 'Digital Lie' down to size. The site...
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Lewis Hamilton Disqualified After China GP Win!
Following his emphatic victory in the Chinese Grand Prix, British racing driver Lewis Hamilton has seen joy turn to despair after being disqualified and relegated to last place by Grand Prix officials, following the end of the race. The Officials...
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Hefner Dumps Girlfriend, Scouts New Prospects at Band Camp
Long time Hugh Hefner girlfriend and former Playmate, Holly Madison, has been kicked to the curb after her rumored spit swapping session with mediocre Las Vegas magician, Chris Angel. Madison, along with two other "girlfriends" had been publicly jo...
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Victoria Beckham To Sue Peterborough United Over Nickname
Victoria Beckham, the wife of that footballer, is to take legal action against Peterborough United Football Club over their nickname, it has been reported. Beckham, who used to be known as Posh Spice when she was a member of all-girl band the Spic...
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Sara Palin 'stimulated' by Barack Obama
Aspiring Republican Vice-Presidential hopeful Alaska governor Sarah Palin allegedly became sexually aroused during the debate between Arizona senator John McCain and Illinois senator Barack last night, according to several sources at the scene. "S...
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Dirty, sexy stiletto politics
"Obama has been palling around with terrorists who would target their own country," Sarah Palin has been repeating into the microphone for a few days now, strutting around in her black stiletto boots. What can Obama do? He can't ignore the atta...
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Snow White's Doc Discredited
Doc, often seen as the most intelligent of Snow White's Dwarfes has been discredited. It is thought the Doc's qualifications were bought over the Internet, from the University of Tesco. Speaking to us earlier, Sneezy said 'Atchoo' before being...
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Sarah Palin reads Playgirl Magazine! "Only for the articles, doggone it," says Palin
Anchorage, Alaska - Unlike President Jimmy Carter, whose popularity shot through the roof in the polls among liberals when he confessed to reading Playboy magazine as one of his vices, Sarah Plain was fearful of losing her conservative base if she a...
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High School Musical 3: The Film Is Shit
Screaming fans greeted the stars of High School Musical 3: The Film Is Shit! for the film's premiere in London's Leicester Square last night, but the biggest moment came when star of the film, Zac Efron, told the crowd: "The film is shit." A hu...
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Dallas Cowboys Cancel Game Against St. Louis Rams
FORTH WORTH, Texas - Dallas Cowboys Head Coach Wade Phillips told ESPN that he has talked to Cowboys owner Jerry Jones and that they have decided that it would be best to cancel next Sunday's game against the St. Louis Rams. Phillips said that th...
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Obama Loses Erection - Moves to Japan to be Enka Singer
Tokyo, Japan - Baro, real name Barrack Obama, is now to be found in Tokyo as an aspiring enka singer. "I never would have entered the presidential race if I thought there was a chance of me losing my erection," explained Baro, in his newly acquired J...
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Stayin' Alive can Kill You Softly
Atlanta, GA - The Center for Musical Disease Control in Atlanta has announced that the Bee Gees' hit song "Stayin' Alive" has one of the best beats for performing CPR. The song played during John Travolta's famous dancing scene in Saturday Night...
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Martha Stewart Crashes Howard Stern's Wedding
Though the actual ceremony dates remained a closely guarded secret by the Stern Show and family, domestic-arts queen, Martha Stewart, had apparently crashed the wedding ceremony at its most inopportune moment. Bursting through the door of the re...
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Madonna to divorce Guy Richie for Lance Armstrong!
It's official - Madonna and Guy Richie are headed for divorce court. And, it is not Alex Rodriquez that is coming between this power couple, the cause of this celeb breakup is none other than Lance Armstrong. Armstrong and Madonna have secretly...
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Jonathan Ross actually got into trouble due to his pronunciation
It has been revealed today that presenter Jonathan Ross actually got himself into his current spot of bother over pronunciation. With 6 million reasons (running to 18 million reasons over 3 years) why he didn't want to resign following his recent...
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Want More Sex? Wear Red
Rochester, NY - Researchers at the University of Rochester have found that wearing red increases sex appeal. It was a red letter day for psychologist Dr Rosie Redfern when she received word that her recent research would be published in the prest...
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McCain Finally Blames Palin For Low Poll Numbers
HOBOKEN, New York - Well it appears that the honeymoon between Senator John McCain and Governor Sarah Palin is finally over. McCain speaking before a crowd gathered at Sinatra Park in Hoboken said that he is extremely disappointed at the latest r...
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Manchester United "Shitting Themselves" Over Hull City Match
Hull City manager Phil Brown is in confident mood as he plans to take his side to Old Trafford to face champions Manchester United on Saturday, and says Sir Alex Ferguson's team of world-beating superstars are "fairly shitting themselves at the prosp...
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Michael Phelps' Girlfriend Confirmed to be Michelle Phillips
Insiders have confirmed that Michael Phelps and co-founder of The Mamas and the Papas Michelle Phillips were seen locking lips last week at a tapas bar near Washington D.C. Ms. Phillips, who has been passing herself as the fictitious 'Nicole Johns...
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