Pentagon's 'synthetic telepathy' technology siphoned off from retro-engineered UFO

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 14 October 2008

image for Pentagon's 'synthetic telepathy' technology siphoned off from retro-engineered UFO
The Pentagon's Thought Police division will monitor all emissions, especially nocturnal ones

Washington AC/DC - (X-Files Mess): Pentagon scientists have siphoned off synthetic telepathy technology from a retro-engineered mothercraft that was once stored in the top security Roswell hangar known as Area 51.

The move marks a radical departure from standard CIA/KGB cold war telekinesis experimentation which used psychotropic hallucinogens such as 3-quinuclidinyl benzilate, known as BZ for short.

Pentagon sources said today they can now 'create email or voice mail' and send it by thought power alone.

The radical new equipment uses standard X-files electroencephalography techniques developed on experimentation with alien abductees like Buzz Aldrin, Whitley Schreiber and Nancy Reagan.

"Using that 'little voice in your head' we can now hook you up to the World Wide Web!" Prof V Smart said today.

The new technology will be monitored by the Pentagon's Thought Police division.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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