Dirty, sexy stiletto politics

Funny story written by isabar

Monday, 6 October 2008

image for Dirty, sexy stiletto politics
Look out 'bama

"Obama has been palling around with terrorists who would target their own country," Sarah Palin has been repeating into the microphone for a few days now, strutting around in her black stiletto boots.

What can Obama do? He can't ignore the attacks, no matter how incredible (he explained his relationship with Bill Ayers during the last debate). So Obama's dusting off his "Charles Keating's McCain's best friend" ads to fight fire with fire.

Karl Rove and his team are counting on a cavalcade of paranoid schizophrenic conspiracy theorists still connecting Obama with Osama. We love a conspiracy theory. Palin's latest mantra resonates with those who still believe Barack Hussein Obama is a Muslim who attended a Madrassa in Indonesia as a child. Unfortunately, inciting such fears can endanger Barack Obama's life.

Yesterday I saw a mentally ill homeless man running up and down the street screaming menacingly, "Obama is Osama, Obama must be stopped before the election!"

The Rove Team has perfected Swiftboating gutter politics designed to win presidential elections by assassinating the character of the opponent. That free for all, everything goes kind of campaign tactic gave us George W Bush, twice. They're counting on us buying into it a third time.

The tanking economy's not helping McCain. Less than a month before the national election (early voting has already started in some states), McCain's way down on the polls. What else can he do? He must focus on Obama's strongest suit, charisma and credibility, and attack it relentlessly until Election Day.

McCain's camp has been pushing the limit on campaign strategy from the beginning of his campaign, but this time they have a lass action superhero. Sarah Palin knows how to smear more than lipstick. She smeared her way into the governor seat in Alaska in stilettos.

But McCain might not win on smears alone. That's why I suggest they remove Palin's smarmy glasses, have her show some cleavage, wear a cape and brandish a whip. I guarantee that'll win McCain the presidential election, or at the very least, a TV series.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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