Written by P.M. Wortham

Monday, 13 October 2008

image for Nancy Grace Changes Hairstyles

On day 120 of her continuous search for the truth in the Caylee Anthony disappearance case, Nancy Grace has agreed to change her hair.

Incapable of changing anything else on her questionably popular but sensationally scripted news broadcast, Ms. Grace set aside a small portion of her show to announce that she would be altering her "style" in the hope that it alone might help change the luck in the search for the missing child.

Apparently oblivious to other daily crimes against humanity from around the world, Grace and her news team continue the daily line up of pre-law students and pathology drop outs who might have an opinion on the Caylee case, though not connected to the case at all.

"She does tend to be myopic", says CNN producer Tom Tinear, "Especially when it comes to news about cute little girls or rich blonde teenagers". Tinear referred to the 300 episodes spent on the missing Natalee Holloway case. "But they do pull the best ratings".

Famous for her soup-bowl haircut, 4 inch bangs and her lunge-forward method of firing questions at her guests, Ms. Grace has been fruitlessly searching for ratings as well as Caylee Anthony. "I'll do whatever it takes to find this girl", Grace announced Thursday. "I'll completely change my hair, if that's what it takes to get a break in this case."

Grace showed up to the CNN set on Friday, but with no visible change to her hair. Tinear stopped to ask her if she planned to alter styles over the weekend, but she replied, "I cut my bangs back a full quarter inch, can't you see that?" To which Tinear reportedly replied, "Yes, Ms. Grace".

In a related story, producer Tom Tinear suddenly resigned from the Nancy Grace Show to take an assistant manager position at McDonalds. He appeared to be much happier.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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